Cravings (Fierce Hearts) (22 page)

“That is a beautiful house.” Kennedy stared at the large, four-story brick home surrounded by forest and fields. “This is where you grew up?” She climbed out of the car and scanned the property. “It’s like heaven.”

Casey walked up beside her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “Growing up a were-lynx is difficult. There were so many rules and so many restrictions. I felt different in public school. But here,” he spread out his arms, “here I felt protected, at home. I’m sorry you didn’t have that, Kennedy.” He frowned and shook his head. “I was very lonely. I would have loved to have had a little sister to tease.” He gave her a glistening smile.

Just then, the front door opened. “Casey, Kennedy, come inside. It’s cold out here.” A woman in the doorway beckoned them inside. “I’m Camille.” She dropped the end of the sentence, a tentative smile lingering. She stepped up beside a man standing in the entryway. “And this is Jerry, my husband.”

“It’s nice to meet you.” Kennedy could have suffocated in the tension.

Camille led them to the living room and gestured to the overstuffed couch and chairs. A fire crackled in the stone fireplace, lending a warm ambiance to the room.

Kennedy tried to suppress her shivers. She wasn’t cold, just petrified. She lifted her chin a bit and first looked Camille in the eye, then Jerry. What she saw made her gasp. Their eyes gleamed with absolute acceptance and love. The words she was about to say fell back down her throat.

“Here, you can sit here beside me, Kennedy,” Casey offered, and patted the couch cushion next to him.

Camille stared at Kennedy. “You’ve hurt your leg?” Her voice came out soft and hesitant.

“Yes. I broke it yesterday. Jonathon Novak stomped on it.”

Camille brought her hand to her mouth and uttered a moan. Tears glistened in her eyes. “Your adoptive father, the man who raised you, broke your leg … on purpose?”

Kennedy stared at the floor. “I wasn’t complying with his plans for me to further the project of The Nexus Group.”

Jerry sputtered. “My God! This is terrible. Where is he now?”

While Casey brought them up to speed about what he knew about her life and the carnage of The Nexus Group, Kennedy sat silent, intermittently touching the thumb of each hand to each finger and twisting a lock of her hair around her finger. She didn’t want to come across as a victim and a weak, whiny woman. But Jerry and Camille’s sorrowful faces and sympathetic utterances touched her. Acknowledgement and acceptance of the hell she’d lived through both held her up and at the same time left her limp .

Jerry shook his head. “Kennedy, I hope you can understand that our participation with The Nexus Group through William Carter was against our will.” His head sank in his hands, and sobs broke from him. When he lifted his head, his eyes were puffy from his tears. “And most of all, you must believe us. We knew nothing of you, your whereabouts, or your ordeal. We were told you died at birth.”

Tears streamed down Kennedy’s face. “I was told you both were killed in a car accident. Then later, I was told you were alive but you didn’t want me.” Casey reached around her and pulled Kennedy close. “Nights I would dream of you coming and taking me away to a home that was safe and loving. But I finally gave up dreaming and hoping.”

“I’m so sorry, Kennedy. Even after we were told you had died, I loved you. I held you in my heart, believing I would never see you. I love you now as much as the days when I carried you in my body.” Her mother’s tears drizzled down her face and dropped into her lap.

“I gave up hope for a good life and a mother who loved me unconditionally, until, that is, Casey and his colony rescued me from the drug experiment TNG was conducting on cats and were-lynxes.” Kennedy turned her eyes on Casey, and he smiled down at her, his golden eyes shining with clarity. “I’ve been coming back to life, so to speak, ever since. I hope they’ll let me stay. I have a lot to learn and to repay them for.”

Jerry wrapped an arm around his sobbing wife and walked her closer to Kennedy. He took Kennedy’s hand and helped her to feet as she pulled on Casey’s hand to join them.

“Could we have a group hug and just hold each other in the awareness of what we’ve been through and the pain and suffering inflicted by TNG? Would you two be comfortable with that?”

“I could use a hug from my real mom and dad.” She put out her arms and joined in an embrace between her brother and her parents.

She stood there, letting the harsh reality she’d lived stand with her, along with the pain the other three had endured for years. The embrace remained hard and grasping. Holding each other in awareness, their tears mingled and fell to the floor. Long minutes ticked by, and still they hugged. Finally, the crying stopped. Kennedy stepped out of the circle, a new sense of belonging growing inside her gut. Casey kissed the top of her hair, and her father kissed her forehead.

Kennedy looked in her mother’s eyes and saw love and something more. Determination. “My precious daughter,” she said. “I’ve missed so much, but we have time to get together and spend lazy hours having fun.” She reached across to Kennedy and pulled her close. Mother and daughter hugging. Kennedy clung to her mom with matching determination.

Uncertainty still sifted through her veins. It would take time and interaction to fully engage with her new family. But moment-by-moment was all she had to think about. She couldn’t wait to talk to Asher about this one.

• • •

Asher paced his living room floor, checking the clock over and over again. Agitation set his nerves on edge as he waited for Kennedy to return from meeting her parents. He’d opted to work from home today so he’d be readily available if she called or needed attention when she arrived. So between pacing, he sat with his laptop, writing a preview of the university’s men’s basketball upcoming season. Fortunately, the sports information department was able to set up an interview with the head coach during a break in the coach’s schedule so Asher could meet his deadline. He prided himself on being dependable and always delivering his articles on time… but with Kennedy’s needs and the unrelenting onslaught from The Nexus Group, he’d been hard pressed to find time for his actual job.

His fingers hammered out the story. Line by line, the words came together in sentences and paragraphs. Finally, he smiled to himself, pleased with how his words had come together and relieved he’d finished. He filed it and plopped on the couch.

Thoughts of Kennedy circled inside his head. He knew her parents, and he expected that if she were willing to be a part of their life, they would welcome her completely. They’d lost her twenty-two years ago, but in the time he’d known them, he’d observed that the alleged death of their child had worn heavy in their hearts regardless of time passing.

He grabbed the paper with his mother’s contact information that Kennedy had given him. Pain gripped his stomach. His own family fell in a different category. They’d cut him out of their lives and didn’t seem to suffer for it. He, on the other hand, struggled with losing them and with finding peace regarding his role in their reaction.

He grabbed handfuls of his hair and screamed inside his head for what he’d done to his brother. How could he even consider for one second that his family would forgive and forget … ever?

Gratitude for Kennedy’s efforts to give him a phone number stirred his beliefs. He wanted to believe they would take him back. He thought of Kennedy and all she’d gone through, yet she’d made significant changes for the better. She’d been so brave. How could he be anything less?

Nerves jangling, he punched in the phone number and waited. One ring. Two rings. Three rings. Four rings.

“Hello?” The sound of his mother’s voice weakened his knees. He reached for a chair to slump into.

“Mom, this is Asher.”

Silence on the other end made his hope waver. Then he heard a sob.

“Asher? Oh my gosh, son. I can’t believe it. I’m so sorry for everything. Please forgive me.”

His breaths came in short pulls. This was unexpected. Holding himself together took all his energy. “Mom, I want to see you and the rest of the family. I’m sorry for all the harm—”

“Shh. Don’t, Asher. Please come home. We’ll talk all about it. Your father and I and your brothers have missed you, son.”

They made arrangements for a visit and hung up. He checked the clock again. Kennedy should be home soon. He couldn’t wait to tell her about the phone call. Excitement tempered his nerves.

A warm spot grew in his heart. He had to talk with Lara. She’d always been there for him, loyal and supportive, even to the extent of distancing herself from the family, too.

He punched in her number and tapped his fingers on his leg, waiting for a response. Finally she answered.

“Hi, Asher. What’s up?”

“Something pretty spectacular.”

She growled low. “Then quit making me wait. Spill!”

“I called Mom.” He heard her faint intake of breath. “She said I could visit her and the rest of the family. I’m planning to go tomorrow.”

“Oh, Asher. Is that what you want? That is amazing. Boy, I haven’t talked to her in years. What was it like?”

“I was nervous, but she was welcoming. We didn’t talk long. Do you want to go with me to see the family?”

Again silence stretched on the other end. “It was wrong what they did to you. If you’re sure reconnecting is what you want, then I’m very happy for you.” Time ticked by as Lara remained quiet. “I said some things that hurt both Mom and Dad. I can’t take them back, and I don’t want to.”

“I get that. But Lara, you’ve made a huge difference in my life. Without you, I don’t know how I would have made it in the world. If you’re not ready to reunite, maybe I shouldn’t either.” Loyalty to his sister meant something to him. He wouldn’t let her down.

“No, I’m not offended that you’ve made plans to see them. I’m glad for you, Asher. I mean that.”

“So you’ll go with me?” He heard the hope lift the tone of his voice. But he wouldn’t want her to do something she was uncomfortable with.

“No, I think this is something you need to do on your own. Mend fences, catch up. I’ll consider what I want to do afterward.”

“If you’re sure.”

“I am. And Asher, I’m proud of you.”

He disconnected and put down his phone, his thoughts churning. He couldn’t imagine what it would be like to see the rest of his family. Would they be able to mend fences? What he’d done was so terrible.

His heart lay flat in his chest. Lara was right. After they left the family, things had been very hard until they’d joined the colony. But he was ready to do whatever it would take to convince them he was different now. And he regretted what he’d done. If he could take it back, he would.

A car in the driveway sent him to the window. He peeked discreetly through a slit in the blinds and saw Casey and Kennedy standing in the snow, hugging. He sighed, relieved to see Kennedy happy and hugging, like it was something she and Casey did all the time.

He turned away and melted into the couch again. Happiness burbled inside his gut. Happiness for Kennedy. She’d finally come home, and home had welcomed her, it appeared.

He heard the car drive away at the same time Kennedy came through the front door. She tossed off her coat and exploded into smiles.

“So everything went well?” Asher walked to her but stopped just short of her reach.

“Better than I could have expected. It’s going to take time to get to know each other. But, Asher, I could feel my parents’ love for me. I couldn’t take it all in.”

“I’m so happy for you.” Why was he letting his own fears about his family keep him detached from her when he really wasn’t?

Kennedy took one step to him and reached out. “Come here.” Her arms wrapped around his neck, and he placed his hands on her waist, noticing the slim curves of her body. He leaned his head on her shoulder, nuzzling her neck. Her scent filled him with her softness, her hard edges, her pain and her joy.

He couldn’t take it. The emotions she elicited spilled through him like water breaking a dam. His breath caught in his throat, and a growl rumbled in his chest.
My God, I’m falling apart.

She didn’t say a word, but she pulled him closer and tightened her arms around him. He didn’t know for sure if he was relieved to see her happy, or if her success triggered his fear of his family’s rejection.

He did know her embrace might have been the only thing keeping him standing. He kissed her neck, breathing in her scent fully. She pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. When she pulled back, she captured his gaze and studied him. “Tough morning?”

He guided her to sit on the couch. He rolled his shoulders and avoided her eyes. “I was worried about you. I guess more than I realized.” He touched her outstretched leg. “Any pain today?”

“Very little. Stop changing the subject.” Her eyes twinkled at him.

“I’m fine.” He avoided her eyes. “I called my mom while you were gone.” He looked up and saw the surprise in her eyes. “You were right. I need to try to make amends. Thank you for providing the information I needed to get started.”

“And what happened?” She jumped up and leaped in tiny, impatient bounces. “Tell me.”

Asher released a pent up breath, relieved Kennedy was here, relieved her reunion with her parents went well, and excited to tell her all about the conversation.

He pulled her down into the couch. “We’re making a trip tomorrow to Estoria. My family wants to see me.”

Kennedy’s hand went to her mouth. “Oh. My. God. Asher, that’s wonderful.”

“Is it? I don’t know what will happen. But I know I have to try to talk it out.”

“Did you talk to your sister? Does she want to go with us?”

Asher chuckled. Kennedy’s excitement cheered him up. “Yes, I did talk to her. She’s going to pass this time.” He wrapped his arms around Kennedy and stood, lifting her off her feet. “But you’ll be there. I’m grateful for that. I won’t be entering hostile territory alone.” He offered her a grimace and walked to the window. The peace outside his window sifted through him. But the jangling nerves persisted.

Kennedy walked up behind him and rested her head against his shoulder. It was a feeling that comforted him.