Authors: Amanda Boone,Amber Duval
4.
Mason didn’t make it quite to the end of the day, and the rest of the week passed in the same way. He’d have sobbing attacks in class and I’d take him for a quick walk to help calm him down. The first week was over, and so far I’d spent more time soothing Mason than actually doing work in my office.
Mrs. Hill had tried to call another teacher to help, and he hadn’t responded to them. It seemed like I was the only person who could get him to settle down. He still hadn’t spoken, however. Mrs. Hill was worried, and I didn’t blame her.
I’d left messages for Justin Steele twice daily since the first one. My blood boiled every time I thought of the man who was ignoring me and, consequently, his son’s needs.
I was so glad it was Friday that I didn’t even care that I’d ended up being the last to leave the building because I was playing catch-up with the rest of my work.
I needed a distraction from school and Amanda had wanted to go out, so I agreed to go to a bar with her. She was the only person I was even remotely comfortable being myself around. I needed that easiness. I thought about running home to change out of my casual Friday wear but decided against it. The last thing I wanted was a run-in with my mom.
I took off the professional blazer I’d been wearing for work and looked in the rearview mirror. My long black hair was curling in every direction, but it gave me a nice, wild look. My green eyes were bright, and the makeup I’d applied that morning was still in place. The tight jeans and black camisole I wore were more revealing than I’d normally wear, but I was exhausted and didn’t care.
Amanda met me at Hank’s Bar and Grill. She was wearing jeans with a top that left her midriff bare. Her red hair was done in large curls that sat perfectly against her back. She looked great, as usual.
“You’ve got the ladies out tonight, Sara Jane!” She fanned herself while checking out my chest.
I gently shoved her and laughed. “I didn’t want to go home and change. I can put the blazer back on if you think this is too much.”
She shook her head. “You look hot! Don’t change a thing.”
The bar was packed as we made our way in, but Amanda managed to get us a table toward the back. We immediately ordered food and drinks and then talked about our weeks. I noticed she didn’t bring up the Steele brothers anymore and pointed it out.
Her cheeks flushed, but she didn’t look away as she told me that she’d just realized that they were normal men. I’d launched into a speech about how giant of a jerk Justin was, and when I’d finished, I realized how tipsy I’d already gotten.
Amanda was downing her drinks faster than me, and her eyes were constantly roaming. “You know…I think those brothers must all be assholes.”
I raised my eyebrows. “I thought you liked them?”
She groaned. “I’ve changed my mind. Just forget I ever said anything good about them.”
I let it go for the time being and took a big bite of my nachos. I’d ended up skipping lunch again that day and I was starving.
“How come I only ever see you when I already have a date?” The familiar deep voice came from right beside me, and I jumped.
I looked over and, sure enough, my cowboy stranger was standing next to me. An older blonde was by his side, her nails practically digging into his arm. When I met his amber-colored eyes, I felt like I’d been punched. He was too handsome to handle in a not completely sober state.
“Maybe you have dates too often?”
He grinned at me with his dimples showing. “Maybe so. You owe me. You left me with your mom the other day and I got interrogated about how we knew each other.”
My face heated, and I looked at Amanda to have somewhere for my eyes to get relief from the cowboy. “Owe you? I understand how tough my mom can be, so I’m willing to negotiate.”
Oh, god. Had I just
flirted?
What was wrong with me? No more drinking. I clearly couldn’t handle my liquor.
He stepped closer and leaned down until he was speaking directly into my ear. “How about I make my demands privately? They’re going to be huge. Your mom asked me what my intentions were and then told me, in no uncertain terms, that I was to stay away from her baby. The look she gave me when I told her I had no intention of staying away from you was worth at least a few nights of your time.”
I didn’t know whether to slap the beard right off his face or kiss him senseless. My body said kiss while my mind liked the slapping version. I shivered when his warm breath washed over my neck and bare shoulder.
“Um, Justin? Aren’t we going to get a table?” His date called for him.
Through the fog in my brain I felt connections trying to fire. Cowboy. Justin. I snapped my eyes back to Amanda and her annoyed expression said it all.
“Justin Steele?”
He gestured for his date to give him a second and squatted next to my chair so that I was in between his strong legs. “You’ve heard of me?”
I decided I didn’t like the cocky edge to his voice. I was sure being a champion bull rider got him plenty of play with other women, but it wasn’t going to work with me, my previous flirtation aside. I’d have been more impressed if he was a champion
dad
.
“A few times. Beyond that, I’m the woman who’s been leaving you messages all week long.”
His full eyebrows slammed together in confusion, and a frown erased any sign of the dimples he liked to show so much. “What?”
Amanda snorted. “You didn’t know who he was?”
I shook my head but focused my anger at Justin. “Sara Barrows. I’m the counselor at Mason’s school. I’ve been trying to get in touch with you all week long.”
His easygoing attitude shifted, and he rested an impatient hand on the back of my chair. “I haven’t gotten any messages.”
“Well, maybe if you’d left your actual number instead of your publicist’s, I could’ve reached you. I get that you’re a big deal or whatever, but if there’s an emergency with Mason, I don’t want to have to contact anyone but you. I would think you’d want a direct line of communication with Mason’s teacher as well.”
Anger sparked in his eyes and made itself a home. He was stunning normally, but angry, I couldn’t look away. His features sharpened and took on a dangerous look that made my mind spin together dark fantasies.
“I thought I did leave my personal number. If I didn’t, it was a mistake. As for your messages, I haven’t received any. I’ll speak with Hannah about that. Now, tell me what’s going on with my son.”
Once again, my mind was the only part of me reacting badly to him. It pissed me off that he was speaking to me like he was. I straightened in my chair and turned to face him dead on. “I’m assuming that you spend time with Mason. He’s not adjusting to being in school. All this week he’s sobbed so hard in class that his teacher, Mrs. Hill, had to ask me to take him out and calm him down. I’ve never seen a kid have quite as much trouble assimilating to school.”
His date tugged at his arm. “Can’t you do this some other time, Justin?”
He shrugged her arm off and cast a cold glance in her direction. “Date’s over. I think Devon’s still outside. Why don’t you see if he’ll give you a ride home?”
Amanda sucked in air and then looked away when I glanced at her. The blond woman hissed out a sharp breath and then shot me a dirty look before storming away. Justin just turned his angry face back to me. There was so much going on with the people around me that I was having a hard time keeping up with what was actually happening.
“I don’t like that you’re trying to imply that I don’t spend any time with my son. I’ve had Mason by my side nonstop since he was born.”
I knew I shouldn’t, but I felt myself scowling. It seemed as if, in the face of Justin Steele, I lost everything I’d ever learned in etiquette classes. “Maybe that’s part of the problem. He should’ve been in school last year. He’s behind everyone else.”
Justin edged closer to me, and his eyes burned like molten lava. Mixed with his dark hair, he was a force to be reckoned with. “I did what I thought was best. Why is he crying at school?”
I took a deep breath and tried to calm down. It wasn’t like me to speak to anyone the way I was speaking to him, but I couldn’t seem to help myself. Still, I tried. “I haven’t done any real work with him yet. I’ve just been keeping him calm enough to go back to class so he can try to learn. If I had to guess? I’m sure a part of it is separation anxiety, if what you’re saying is true and he has been with you constantly. The rest I’m not sure about yet, honestly.”
He shook his head. “
Anxiety
? Nice try,
doc.
He’s six, though. He doesn’t have anxiety.”
I grabbed my drink and finished it. “I’m just telling you what I think. You don’t have to do anything with it. At the current rate, however, Mason isn’t going to learn anything. He can’t calm down enough to pick up anything Mrs. Hill is teaching.”
“Oh, I’m so sure she’s taught
so
much in one week.”
I slapped my hand down on the table, rattling the plates and glasses and drawing eyes to us. I leaned down until he could hear me clearly but no one else would. “I don’t know what your issue is, but I suggest you put it aside for the sake of Mason. He’s a sweet kid, but he hasn’t opened his mouth once all week. He holds my hand while we walk and has taken to smiling at me but he still won’t speak. Something is going on with him, whether you like it or not.
“As for Mrs. Hill’s curriculum…it may be a small school, but we’ve received an A rating for the past seven years. It’s an advanced curriculum. If he gets behind it’ll be hard to catch him up. Do you really want him to be seven in kindergarten next year? Twenty when he graduates high school?”
I took a deep breath and shook my head. “I know it seems dramatic, but you haven’t heard the way he screams in class. It’s heartbreaking. I just want to help, and it’ll be a whole lot easier if I don’t have you behind the scenes fighting me constantly.”
When I paused, Justin took off his hat and rubbed his hands down his face roughly. I wasn’t completely finished yet, though. “And you should be nicer to your dates. That was really rude of you.”
5.
Justin stormed out of the bar and left a crowd of Martinsville’s finest citizens staring at my table. I’d known a lot of them my whole life, and I knew they’d never seen me act out of character.
My face was bright red, and I suddenly didn’t want to be in public. I looked across at Amanda, whose mouth was hanging open. “I have to go. I’m sorry for that.”
She snapped her jaw together and shook her head. “Don’t apologize. It was amazing. You’ll have to tell me the whole story later.”
I nodded. “Sometime. I’m completely sober now. You want a ride home?”
“I’m going to stay and try to forget what a crappy week this has been.”
I moved around the table and hugged her. “Call me if you need anything tonight.”
I left the bar quickly and retreated to my car. I glanced over at my passenger seat, which was full of paperwork for school. It just reminded me of Mason and made me sad. I’d handled Justin poorly. I should’ve been calm and nice, but I was so stressed about Mason not being okay that I’d let anger build in me all week until it’d lashed out in an ugly way.
I drove home to my apartment and groaned when I spotted my mom’s silhouette in the doorway of the staircase that led up to my front door. I wasn’t ready to deal with anything else.
Before I could even get out of my car, she was talking at me. “What are you wearing, Sara Jane? Your clothes are too tight. You’re supposed to hide some things. You’ve got every curve on your body showing right now.”
I looked down and shrugged. I was a curvy woman. It wasn’t that big of a deal if it showed. Not to
me,
anyway.
“I heard you were with that Justin Steele again. I don’t think he’s good for you, Sara. He’s vulgar and rude. He’s been seen with a different woman every night. I don’t want you to be one of those women.”
I forced myself to remain calm. “Of course not, Mom. I’m not interested in Justin. I’ve been working with his son, Mason. That’s the only thing we were talking about.”
She nodded. “Good. Keep it that way.”
I knew what was coming when she clasped her hands together and her face transformed into a grin. “I found the perfect guy for you, Sara. I’m so excited about this.”
I just stared at her. It was getting harder and harder to remain sweet.
“He’s my friend’s son. He’s been out of town on business, but he just got back. His name is Walter Williams. He wants to go out with you. He’s free tomorrow night.”
If I opened my mouth I was going to lose it. I went with shaking my head instead.
“Now, honey, you’re twenty-five. It’s time to settle down. Be ready tomorrow at six-thirty. He’ll pick you up then.”
She marched off quickly to avoid any protest I might’ve had. I just stood there, staring after her.
I let myself into my apartment and sat down on my couch. My head had started throbbing at some point, and it was all I could do to sit up. Finally I gave up and fell over into my soft pillows. The pillows that mom had suggested looked too colorful.
I shut my brain off and let my eyes close. I needed to rest before I tried to do anything else.
***
The next day I felt more energized but no less annoyed with my life. I was once again getting ready for a date that I didn’t want to go on with a man that I was probably going to hate. I
was
twenty-five. Yet I was living like I was still in high school. Mom and her rules were still controlling me.
An urge to fight back in any way that I could settled in my bones, and I decided to wear something that I liked instead of what mom liked. She wanted me to cover my body completely, until maybe no one could tell I was curvy. I liked to wear cute clothes and show off the fact that I was a woman with a soft body.
I wore a peach-colored, lace-fit, and flare dress that stopped several inches above my knees. Nude wedge heels and gold bangles finished the outfit. I even curled my hair and did a nice smoky eye.
I looked at myself in the mirror and smiled. I looked good. Sexy, even. Mom would absolutely hate it.
At six-thirty exactly Walter Williams showed up. When I opened my door, his grin died the second he saw me. I watched as his eyes went to my hips, and he shook his head just a bit before looking back up at my eyes.
I wanted to punch him already. “Hi. I’m Sara.”
He introduced himself and then led me to his car. “I haven’t been back in town for long, but I’ve tried the bar called Hank’s and it’s really good. Is that okay with you?”
I bit my lip and nodded. Once again I’d be sorely overdressed. At least I’d look good this time, I thought bitterly. I hadn’t planned on showing my face at Hank’s so soon, but I didn’t see a way to avoid it.
The same as the night before, the bar was full. Walter scored us a table after waiting for a few minutes and then we sat down. There’d been no conversation yet. My skin was practically crawling from how uncomfortable it was. I decided right then and there that I’d gone on my last blind date for my mom. She could go to hell.
Walter kept glancing at my breasts and then down at my stomach before looking away. It was obvious he had an issue with my weight. Normally I wouldn’t care, but I’d spent time and effort on looking good. He was looking at me like I was morbidly obese. Not that his looks would be acceptable even if I was.
When the waiter came to get our order, I saw that he was a kid from the high school. He looked at me and grinned. “Damn, Miss Sara. You clean up nice!”
I laughed and shook my head. “Thank you, Trevor. That’s sweet of you.”
“You know, I graduate this year.”
Walter cleared his throat and frowned. “I don’t see how this is appropriate.”
I barely hid my eye roll. “Do you know what you’d like to eat?”
“I’ll take the classic burger with cheese. Sara, um, why don’t you get the salad?”
It wasn’t the first time it’d happened, but having it happen in front of a student set my cheeks on fire. Anger followed embarrassment quickly, and I looked up at Trevor. “Will you hold off on putting an order in?”
He nodded and winked at me before moving away.
Walter crossed his arms over his chest. “I was ready to order some food.”
I nodded and kept my voice steady. “Look, I’m sorry. I don’t know how my mom always finds men that prefer thin women. It’s obvious that you don’t like my curves and that’s fine. You’re not going to look at me in disgust and order a salad for me, though. I don’t need it.”
He raised his eyebrows and sat back in his chair. “What
do
you need, then?”
“Someone who appreciates me. Not this.” I was about to say more when I felt little arms trying to wrap around me. I looked down and there was Mason.
It was early still, so plenty of families were still in Hank’s, enjoying the food before the drinks got going. I was still surprised to see Mason, though. I leaned down and wrapped my arms around him and grinned when he looked up at me.
“Hi! I didn’t think I’d see you this weekend! Did you miss me?”
His answering smile and nod melted my heart.
“Come on, Sara. Clearly you’re not happy with your weight either. You practically throw yourself at people for attention. I just think that if you weren’t fat, you’d be nicer.”
He did
not
say the f word. I wasn’t fat! That was the kicker. I looked down at Mason and swallowed my angry words. “I’m going to make sure he gets back to his dad. Why don’t you settle the bill for us?”
“Really? Now you’re going to dramatically end the meal? What a waste of time. I should’ve known something was wrong when your mom gave me money to cover dinner.”
My face burned when I heard what he said, and I balled my free fist up. I wanted to hit him so badly.
Mason tugged at my other hand and I let him pull me away. He led me to the other side of the bar and right up to his dad. I nearly cried on the spot when I saw that it was clearly a family get-together.