Come Back To Me (17 page)

“Hey, what’s going on in there?”

“Nothing,” she called, trying hard not to laugh. “Just caught in the sheet.”

“Need any help?”

“Nope, I’m good.
I’m very, very good
.

J
ames’ fellow residents and his family were stunned by the swiftness with which he committed to Cara. His friend, William Donovan, was the first to be won over to their cause, although he immediately took Cara aside to complain. “You never gave me a chance.”

James’ mother and his sisters were next. As soon as he had another free weekend, James drove a very nervous Cara up to Minneapolis to meet his family. James’ mother and his two sisters were affectionate with each other and with James. Watching their interaction made it easy for Cara to see where James had learned how to treat a woman.

Cara’s mother was another story altogether. She was vehement about her opposition to their relationship, yet she refused to give Cara any explanation as to why. James’ mother insisted upon speaking with Louise Franklin personally, to discuss the situation and ask her to give James and Cara a chance.

After the phone call, Cara’s mother admitted she felt a kinship with his mother, learning she too had lost her husband. Louise talked to Cara about how much the two of them had common, both widows and single mothers raising teenagers. The irony wasn’t lost on Cara, but at least her mother stopped criticizing James.

The summer months passed in a flash. James rotation in Infectious Disease wound down, and he began packing in mid-August. He waited until Cara’s semester finished so she could fly to North Carolina with him to help choose an apartment since she would be sharing it after she graduated in December. He’d be there for two years and neither wanted to be apart any longer than necessary.

Cara’s plans for Grad school had now changed because of her involvement with James, and Cara hadn’t yet decided where she would apply. Once James left for Durham, she figured she’d have plenty of time to consider her options. Between the nights she spent with him, the research on her senior thesis for Art History and her hours in the studio, Cara didn’t have much time left to think about it. Besides, she and James were focused on other things. Like each other.

As a third year resident, James had more freedom than he’d had for the previous six years. He had Boards to consider, but he figured if he didn’t know his stuff by now he never would so he didn’t bother reviewing. He’d already arranged to take his Boards out in North Carolina where he wouldn’t be so distracted by Cara. He found it hard to concentrate when he could smell the sunshine on her velvety skin, when she tasted like nectar and she fitted him like a kid glove.

Cara and James spent three days in Durham, renting an apartment near the med center that satisfied them both. It had a large kitchen for James and a lot of natural light for Cara.

The hardest part was returning to Iowa City to help James pack his things and load up his car. They wouldn’t see each other again until Thanksgiving, when they planned to meet in Minneapolis.

James stuffed his sports car to the roof with his clothes, kitchen equipment, music albums and books. Cara loaded a box of glasses into the back seat, her eyes filled with tears. Since their first night together she and James had been in either her bed or his. He’d become an integral part of her life, flowing through her bloodstream with every single beat of her heart. She didn’t want him to leave. Cara reminded herself that she’d see him in three months.

James came up behind her. His arms slid around her waist and he pulled her against him.

“It’ll go by fast,” he said, his voice low in her ear.

Cara leaned her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes. For a few moments she didn’t trust herself to speak. She didn’t want to make this parting any harder for him than it already was. James put his hands on her shoulders and turned her around to face him. She burst into tears.

“Honey, it’s okay.” One of his big hands moved beneath her hair to cradle the back of her head.

“It feels like . . . It feels like my heart is being ripped out of my chest.” Cara sobbed. As James began to say something she put a hand over his mouth. “I know it’s only for a few months. I know, but it seems as if I’ve just barely found you and I’m already losing you.”

James laughed. “Losing me?” He tilted her chin up. “Baby, you couldn’t lose me if you flew to the moon. Don’t you get it? I’m yours. I am hopelessly in love with you. Let me repeat that. I am hopelessly in love with you.”

James pressed his lips against hers, hard, claiming her. Cara twined her arms around his neck and returned his kiss with equal fervor.

God almighty, he takes my breath away.

“I have something for you,” James said, breaking off the kiss.

“Hmm?”

He reached around her into a box he’d set on the roof of the car. He pulled out a stack of cassette tapes.

“I made these for you. My favorite music. I hope when you listen to the tapes you’ll remember me.” James flashed the grin that obliterated every one of Cara’s defenses.

She held out her hands for the tapes. As into details as James was, he’d labeled each tape with the artist, the songs and the date of release. She smiled despite her tears. As if she’d forget the songs they’d made love to.

“Thank you.”

“That’s all you have to say? Thank you? Not thank you, James, I love you too? Thank you, James, I’m yours forever? Thank you James, I’ll wait for you until the end of the world?”

Cara laughed. “All of the above. I love you too. I’m yours forever. I’ll wait for you until the end of the world. Remember that. I will love you no matter what.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

“All right, sweetheart, I have to get going. You’ll be okay.”

“Yes, I’ll be fine.” Cara pretended a confidence she didn’t feel. “Drive safe and call me as soon as you arrive.”

James pulled her close for another kiss, and another.

“I will,” he said.

James tossed the last box onto the floor of his car and climbed into the driver’s seat. Rolling down the window, he grabbed Cara’s tee shirt, drawing her towards him for a final kiss. Cara’s lips tingled when they separated. She watched in silence as he pulled away from the curb. James stuck his arm out the window and waved. She waved back, standing at the curb until the car vanished from sight.

Cara sighed and headed down the hill towards the river. The air seemed heavy as she walked back to her apartment. Despite the fact that the morning was already oppressively hot, Cara felt chilled. Thunderheads built in the western sky. She wondered if a thunderstorm was just what she needed. It would match her dark mood. Despite James’ reassurance that all was well, she couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off. Perhaps after the rain had passed her anxiety would pass with it. She decided to spend some time in the studio. She still needed to finish the portrait of James. When she was with him, she hadn’t felt any urgency to get it done. Now she did. Yes, an afternoon in the studio would do her good. Concentrating on a painting would rid her of this growing sense of unease.
It’s only because you’ve grown so accustomed to his presence. James is right, everything will be fine
.

Thanksgiving 1976

O
f course it rained on Thanksgiving. As anxious as she was to see James, she had her mother and her grandmother in the car, so she was forced to take her time. Her mother seemed more relaxed than she’d ever been. Cara suspected it had a lot to do with Phil Jackson, her father’s old law partner. He’d lost his wife to cancer the year before and he and her mom were
seeing
each other. Her mother actually smiled often during the trip. She refrained from criticizing Cara’s driving and she was quite attentive towards Cara’s grandmother.

Well, if Phil had something to do with these improvements then Cara had to hand it to him. It was nice to see her mom happy for a change. Come to think of it, Cara wasn’t certain she’d seen her mother happy. This was a revelation. The changes in her grandmother were another. Although her grandmother’s mind was as sharp as ever, her physical condition had deteriorated. She now needed a wheelchair and she’d been forced to move out of her own home and into a nursing facility. Maybe the changes were more apparent because Cara didn’t see her very often. She decided to make a point of visiting back home before she moved to North Carolina. Her grandmother might not have much time left.

Cara blinked away tears. It was hard enough to see the road with the rain coming down.

Unless there was a delay in Chicago, James’ plane should have landed by now. He was due in at one thirty and it was almost three. Cara’s stomach was busy turning cartwheels and her heart sped up whenever she thought of him. So did the car. Cara wished she could go a tiny bit faster, but James would be waiting for her whether it took her forty-five minutes or another two hours.

Regardless of how busy he was, James took the time to write to her. Cara read his letters over and over. James didn’t waste words, he told her exactly what he was doing, what his plans were and how much he loved her. Cara cherished his letters. She stored them in a shoebox along with a few items he’d given her over the summer . . . Wildflowers that she’d dried and preserved between two sheets of waxed paper, along with a pencil sketch he did of her lying on his bed. The drawing was so awful it made her laugh, but every time she pulled it out of the box she remembered how he’d looked at her when he drew it. She would never forget the expression on his face or the way he made love to her afterward.

Cara negotiated the Minneapolis holiday traffic and pulled up in front of the house, rain still pouring down. James stood in the front yard, soaked to the skin, his shirt clinging to his broad chest. Shoving the car into park, heedless of the downpour, she raced towards him. With a big grin, James opened his arms. Running all out, Cara jumped into them, clutching his neck, kissing every part of him within reach. James laughed so hard he stumbled backward and sprawled onto the wet grass, Cara cradled in his arms.

James flipped her over and covered her with his hard body. For an instant Cara was aware of lying in an icy puddle, but she forgot the cold the instant James’ eyes locked on her face. His pupils dilated, changing from golden brown to black, exactly the way she remembered.

James lowered his mouth to her, kissing her like he was a starving man. Cara’s fingers slid up over his shoulders, threading their way into his wet hair in a desperate attempt to pull him closer. He pressed against her, both of them heedless of the rain and the eyes that stared at them from the car windows.

“Hey! Hey! Take it inside! What the hell is the matter with you two?”

James growled against her mouth, expressing his unhappiness at the interruption. Cara pulled away and tilted her head back. She stared upside down into William Donovan’s grinning face. Cara laughed at the sight.

“What are you doing here?”

“What do you think? Hanging out with my best bud and his girl. There wasn’t time to fly back to New York, so here I am.” He pointed toward Cara’s car, squinting. “I think you need to get your grandmother inside.”

“Oh shit!” Cara placed her palms against James’ chest, trying in vain to shove him off.

“Uh-uh, not yet,” he said. “I like you all wet beneath me.” He lowered his lips to hers once more.

Cara melted into his kiss.

“Oh for god’s sake!” William stomped over to the car with an umbrella and escorted Cara’s mother to the front door.

Still grinning, James got to his feet, pulling Cara up with him. He helped her unload her grandmother’s wheelchair while William returned with the umbrella. The three of them managed to get her grandmother indoors and then William and James went back for the bags. Waiting, red-faced and dripping in the entryway, her grandmother gave her a wink and Cara burst out laughing. James’ sister handed her a towel and she dried off as best she could, mopping up the floor just as James and William trooped in, enlarging the puddle.

“That seems kind of hopeless,” said James’ mother. She gave Cara a hug. “Why don’t you two go upstairs and get changed and I’ll take care of this.”