Bound by Spells (Bound Series Book 2) (11 page)

“Okay! Okay, I believe you!” I had to laugh. There was nothing but light and laughter in the air. I needed to leave but I was worried about what would happen if I walked away again. Would they merge back together like before? As quickly as the thought appeared, the purple and green-tinged light was inches from me. It collapsed down into a smaller and smaller ball, until it was the size of a basketball hovering right in front of my right hand. As I slowly lifted my arm parallel to the ground, it followed it up, staying level with my outstretched fingers. I inched forward and my fingertips grazed the ball of energy. It snapped and sounded like twigs crackling in a fire. It hurt, but not really. Without allowing myself another thought, I shoved my arm through the ball, all the way to my elbow, fully immersing the cuff. In one thunderous boom, the ball burst into a million individual particles, showering the room. I shielded my eyes from the bright light and was awestruck to find it snap back together just as fast. It stayed a small ball, hovering in front of me.

“What just happened? Will you stay this way now?” I didn’t expect an answer, but the orb quickly illuminated, dimmed, and then settled in the back of the room. The violet and blue energy pulled together and came to me in the same way. I repeated the act of pushing my cuff through each one until the white energy was all that remained, but it didn’t come to me. It hovered at the top of the room, refusing to come down. I cajoled and begged, but exhaustion was quickly taking hold again. Finally, I could barely hold my eyes open and frustration got the better of me.

“Fine!” I yelled. “You just stay up there and don’t let me help you. But I’m going to need you and you can’t mess this up!” It was maddening to know I was yelling at charged air. But the white ball reacted and then slid even further from me. With a harrumph
,
I backed out of the room and slowly closed the door. I looked through the crack right before I shut it and everything looked just as I had left it. As I pushed the door firmly closed, I waited for the wailing and emotion to rise again, but felt nothing. It was quiet. Quiet was what I needed. Sleep was what I needed. I opened my eyes to find myself in my bed and only left them open long enough to pull the cord on the lamp and let sleep take over.

Aidan
. He was there again, waiting for me in the woods. I found myself in the same place we had been last time and he was just across the clearing. I stood quietly, simply allowing myself to watch him. A part of me knew he had to know I was there, but he hadn’t shown it. He continued to clean himself, taking slow licks across one paw and then rubbing it over his head. As a wolf, his movements were deliberate and sure, just like when he was human. The fur on the top of his head stood up in the same way his human hair had. I ached for human Aidan. I wanted him to hold me, to whisper in my ear…to make me laugh. I wanted a brief escape but my mind refused to give him to me in that way, so I took a step toward the only Aidan I was allowed.

As soon as my foot collided with the earth and the dry leaves crunched under me, Aidan’s head lifted. I saw it in his eyes. He had been waiting for me to make the first move. His eyes never wavered from mine—a spotlight through the clearest blue ocean. If I did nothing but look in his eyes, I could pretend I was walking toward Aidan the man. My mind’s tricks were everything I needed and everything I couldn’t take, all at once.

As I stopped in front of him, unsure of what to do, I was suddenly nervous and unable to make eye contact. I fidgeted and a shyness I hadn’t felt since his initial pursuit took over. As I waged an internal war over what to do, Aidan did what he did best—taking control of the decision for me. He had always known what I needed before I did. He got up and circled me. He stopped when he was facing me and sat down. Even sitting, his head was close to chest level. His tail swished back and forth behind him and his eyes were full of patience. He let out a low yelp and it was all the encouragement I needed to drop to the ground and wrap my arms around him. My body was positioned between his front paws and he nuzzled into my hair as I struggled to maintain control of my raging emotions. I held on to him, as if he were my life raft in the sea of uncertainty and fear I now lived in.

After a few minutes, I pulled back, feeling silly and uncertain. I was close to crying and cuddling with a giant wolf. A wolf my mind created to take the place of my used-to-be-human boyfriend. I was completely losing it.

Aidan must have felt my withdrawal. He let out a series of short yips and I looked up, seeing his frustration. The wolf wanted to talk to me as much as I wanted the real Aidan to talk to. Since I was there and we were both clearly looking for something, I just started talking. The words fell from my mouth like leaves from a tree in autumn, one after the other in a quiet rush to the ground. I had so many things I was never able to say to him and I was saying them now.

“I never wanted to walk away from you, Aidan, and though it seemed like I had a choice, I never truly did. Since I was old enough to understand, I’ve known a destiny had been set for me and it wasn’t fair of me to involve you in any of it. You just wouldn’t let me let you go.”

He snorted, and it was too close to the sarcastic sounds he would have made in human form. I had to laugh.

“You gave me something I’d never had. You gave me hope. You made me believe I was more than the words from some old woman, more than the power inside me everyone seems to want. You made me believe that someone could choose me for who I was, not what I was.” He whined a soft, low sound that brought tears to my eyes and forced me to take our conversation in a different direction. There was so much he didn’t know about me and being honest with him felt good.

Every so often, I glanced up to find him looking me directly in the eyes. Aidan listened raptly as I explained who I really was and the story of my life. I started at the beginning, with what I knew about my people and my parents. And when it came time to explain the night my mother died, he came to me, not allowing me to relive the memory alone. He lay down and pawed at me until I lay with him. He stretched out and I put my head on his chest, near his head. I could hear his heartbeat and I breathed him in. I stopped talking and just savored each inhale, trying to memorize the feeling. I wanted to pull him inside of me and keep him there for whenever I felt alone. I turned on my side and splayed one hand into the fur of his chest. He almost purred in response, a throaty sound reminding me of the way his voice would deepen before he kissed me.

I told him stories about Baleon and Micah and he would sometimes snort or growl, which told me he knew what I was saying. Finally, I just lay there with my eyes closed, letting the feel of our magic together become the only thing I knew. I could see my violet smoke, wispy and wafting, encircling his blue fire. They pushed into each other, becoming a color I couldn’t name but knew was just as special as what we had.

I sighed as I both thanked and cursed my mind for giving me this gift. I worked hard to only show Micah the strong side of me. To take everything in stride. But I was terrified and had no idea what I was doing. I stayed in the fetal position, relishing in the feel of him around me for as long as my mind would allow. When I woke up, curled around a pillow, I could still smell citrus and woods. I swallowed down the tears I wouldn’t allow and forced myself to sit up. It was a new day and another day closer to when the Queen would come home. I had work to do.

Chapter 11

The
caves weren’t so bad. Or so I kept telling myself. They were dark and smelled like dirt and wet fur. They were small and cramped. But, they were a product of volcanic activity and helped hide the AniMages from the Queen and her Hunters, so it wasn’t like I could complain. Bethany, Charlie, and I had been kept together, as we were the only ones who didn’t really belong. Elias put us closer to the entrance, since Bethany didn’t have the benefit of nocturnal vision like the rest of us.

I had given up trying to sleep hours ago, as my too-long legs jutted off the end of a twin mattress. Bethany was just across the small space they called our room and Charlie sat sentry between us, tall and stiff. His only movements were to turn his head left or right, looking at Bethany or me when we would jostle on our beds. I hadn’t forgotten the Hunter referring to him as a Sentinel, but it didn’t seem like something anyone else had guessed or understood, so for now, I was holding that question for another time.

I was frustrated. We had come to find Elias. To get his help, to go find Cole and Amelia and get them out of wherever the hell the psycho Queen had taken them. Bethany had continued to educate me on the Queen and I still couldn’t wrap my mind around the stories. Or being one of the people the Queen hated. With my blue eyes and my shifting form, I was lumped in with them, and we were numero uno on her shit list. I had so many questions for Elias, yet he managed to answer none of them.

We had walked for a while, following Elias down the trail until we came to another clearing. Campfires were set up and AniMages were stationed around them in small groups. Some were shifted, some human, but they looked at us like we were the ones to be feared. Wide eyes and hushed whispers followed Bethany, Charlie, and me around the area. All except Dillon. He was perfectly content to talk Bethany's ear off. He talked about how cool it was to be an owl and how much Elias trusted him to scout the area. He puffed up his little man chest and declared, “I only have to get a little bigger before I can fight. But don’t you worry, Miss Bethany, I can protect you.” She nodded graciously and we both fought to hold back our smiles as our eyes connected. B assured Little Man he was all she needed and you'd have thought she handed him the moon.

I tried to take in as much of the scene as possible, without making it obvious I was scouting. I counted twenty-three AniMages, including Elias and Dillon, and noted Dillon as the only child I’d seen. Were the other kids hidden deeper in the caves behind us? The opening to the cave was no bigger than a doorway and surrounded by shrubbery. It was a pitch black hole and didn’t feel terribly inviting. Bethany stood close to me, her fingers gripping Charlie’s collar as she, too, scanned the crowd. She’d been here before and wasn’t overly thrilled to be back. It wasn’t until Elias gestured us to a small fire pit with food roasting on a spit that her stomach growled, breaking the strained silence. Elias laughed and I heard chuckles coming from around the other fires. I relaxed a little and led the way to the pit.

Elias piled plates high with roasted meat and canned vegetables, even tossing Charlie a bone to gnaw on. Though, every time I opened my mouth to ask a question, he’d start another story. I knew he was reading my mind and I was losing patience with being respectful. We were wasting time. But his people surrounded us and I couldn’t guarantee Bethany’s safety. I wasn’t sure I could stop myself from shifting and I still had no memory when it came to what happened while I was changed. I was more afraid of the unknown than I was frustrated with Elias. And my power was reacting to all of the AniMages around me. Each of them was a distinct energy and it was driving my beast crazy.

I kept trying to push him down and keep my abilities to myself, but whatever was inside me was going full-bore, ping-ponging in my veins, pushing against my skin, and threatening to come out. Pressure built in my head and power gathered in my hands. A light blue mist enveloped my palms and I clenched my fists so tight, I could feel my short nails embedding themselves in my palms. I hadn’t blown anything up since that day on the beach with Amelia and I thought that part of my change was over.

“Will you keep denying it, Aidan?” Elias asked. He was picking the meat from a chicken bone and looking up at me like a teacher asking a question when they already knew how you would answer.

“Denying what?” I answered, challenging him. Giving him exactly what he assumed he’d get.

“What you are. Why do you disregard what you feel? Why do you not allow it to fully merge into you? All you have to do is accept it. It really is that simple.” Elias spoke softly but clearly. Bethany slid a little closer to me on the log and a guttural growl started deep in Charlie’s throat. I turned to find us surrounded by every person…animal…AniMage. Men stood with their arms crossed, or holding the hands of their women. Some had shifted and approached in their native forms of big cats, wolves, or bears. I was instantly calculating how quickly I could grab Bethany and get the hell out of there when Dillon broke through the circle and ran to Bethany. He postured in front of the crowd, his small hands clenched in fists as he stood beside us and leaned toward Elias.