Blue (Darkness Falls #3) (15 page)

The camera crew appeared for a couple of hours as the house tried to adjust around Noelle’s inability to do very much of anything and her temper was wearing short by the time they left again. Thomas was jittery and even Lisette noticed, offering to help him tidy up the kitchen after dinner when he dropped a glass that smashed all over the floor.
At Noelle’s insistence, Blue had carried her down the stairs so she could eat with them at the table, propped up with cushions. He was so preoccupied with making sure no-one cut themselves on the broken glass that he didn’t notice Noelle’s face getting progressively paler until he turned around to smile at her and realised she’d broken out in a cold sweat.

“What’s wrong?” He murmured, not wanting to alarm the others, but up close he could see that tears were standing in her eyes.

“So much pain.” Her teeth were gritted. “Please…either call Cal or take me back to hospital.”

He wasn’t taking her back to hospital, so he dialled Cal without hesitation and the older master rushed over. By the time he arrived, Blue had managed to get Noelle up to the bedroom but she was crying and it was breaking his heart. He wanted to ask her why she hadn’t complained, or told him that the painkillers were wearing off, but an interrogation was the last thing she needed. It was awful. He paced up and down the side of the bed until Cal was ready.

“You need to get her upright.” Cal ordered and Blue obeyed, gently sitting her up and leaning her against his body as she slumped at the edge of the bed, crying into his stomach.

“It’ll stop hurting soon.” He soothed, his voice breaking as he stroked her hair. Cal lifted her top and peeled the dressing away from her smooth skin.

“The epidural catheter has come loose.” He sighed. “I’m not a trained anaesthetist, Red. I’m not happy to put this back in myself. I could hurt you.”

“What are the options?” Blue asked and Cal shrugged.

“Either we take her back to hospital and get the catheter put back in right now, or we switch to injections for tonight and I’ll see if I can get a private anaesthesiologist to come out and reinsert the catheter first thing in the morning.”

“Red.” Supporting her shoulders with his hands, he knelt before her. “Tell me what you want, honey.”

“Just make it stop!” She sobbed, trembling.

“I’ll give her something now.” Cal grabbed his bag when Blue looked to him for help. “You can decided in an hour or so when she’s come down from the pain.” He prepared a syringe and injected it straight into the vein. For a few minutes nothing happened and then she began to uncurl herself from the tangled mess of pain she was hunched in.

“Better?” Blue asked and she took a shuddering breath.

“Much, thank you.”
Her smile was watery and he smoothed gentle thumbs under her eyes to brush away the tears.

“Good. What do you want to do?”

“If I go back to hospital they’ll keep me in and I can’t do that, not tonight.”

Blue refrained from asking why tonight in particular, looking to Cal instead. The older master nodded. “That’s fine. I’ll put a cannula in and Blue can give you a couple of doses of morphine tonight. I’ll see what I can do about getting someone here
tomorrow.”

He did as he promised, also removing the dressing from her back and cleaning the tiny puncture wound from the catheter, covering it with yet another dressing. Blue flinched as he watched. Her beautiful body was a broken mess and it shredded him inside. In a sick and twisted way, it was the best thing Alexandra could have done. She’d hardened his heart against her. The fear was still there and the in-built compulsion to obey her was just as strong as ever, but she’d crushed any lingering affection that may have been lurking under the surface of his turmoil. She’d hurt Noelle, his precious, sweet Noelle. Alexandra was dead to him.

Exhausted from the pain and her crying jag, it didn’t take long for Noelle to fall asleep and Blue went to escort Cal to the door, surprised to find the rest of the family hovering on the landing.

“How is she?” Thomas was almost bouncing on the balls of his feet and Blue frowned. The sub looked totally wired, the way he used to in the throes of his pain addiction
, which didn’t make sense. He was only a day out from his last session at The Manor.

“She’ll be fine.” Cal’s nod and smile were reassuring. “She’s sleeping now and I’ll get a doctor out here first thing in the morning.”

“Did we do something wrong?” Amelie asked, her voice timid, and Blue swept her up in a fierce hug.

“No sweetie, it wasn’t you. It wasn’t anything any of us did. The doctors at the hospital put a special magic tube in her back to keep the pain away and it fell out. It was just an accident and she’ll be fine.”

“I like her.” The small child ran her palms over the stubble on his face. “She’s the best mama I’ve ever had.”

Blue couldn’t even speak for a few moments, but he didn’t miss the peculiar look on Cal’s face. “She’s very special.” He forced out, making himself smile so his daughters didn’t get scared. “She’s the most amazing woman I’ve ever loved.”

“Well I’ll just be going then.” Cal cleared his throat and it looked like he was trying to smother a laugh.

“Lisette, would you walk your
Grandpa
Cal to the door, please?” Blue snapped. See how the infamous Master Henway liked that one. To his astonishment, his mentor looked absolutely poleaxed.

“Grandpa?” Lisette beamed. “I didn’t know we were family!”

Well that backfired spectacularly. “Cal is the closest thing I’ve ever had to a father.” He shrugged, feeling awkward over this whole impromptu outpouring of emotion. “I consider him family.”

“Then so do
I.” In her determination to have a normal family and a normal life, Lisette didn’t even see the charisma that set Cal apart from other men. He was the first proper grandfather she’d ever had and she wanted to make the most of it. She took Cal’s hand and skipped along the hallway by his side as he looked at her with utter bemusement. Blue sighed. His moment of misguided retaliation was going to come back to bite him in the ass. He just knew it.

“I’m going to go and put Amelie to bed.” He told Thomas and the sub nodded.

“I have things to do in the kitchen.” He almost fled from the landing and Blue shook his head. Today was rapidly going downhill.

With Amelie bathed and in bed and Lisette set up with a movie in her room, Blue finally locked up, turned all the lights off and headed in to check on Noelle. She was awake and she’d taken the neck brace off.

“Hey.” He smiled and she smiled back, her face looking wan and strained.

“Hey yourself, handsome.” She licked her lips. “Can you come here? I need to talk to you while Thomas is in the shower.”

“Is he okay?” He came to lie on the bed beside her. “He seems jittery.”

“He is. He’s not coping with this at all and his anxiety is spiralling out of control. I tried to speak to him about it and he won’t tell me what’s going on because he thinks I can’t do anything about it.”

He had a point. She wasn’t in any kind of fit state to go a few rounds in the play room with him. “I can take him into the play room.” He offered. Thomas had been his sub, so it wasn’t like he didn’t know his body and the way his kink worked.

“It needs to come from me.” She disagreed. “When I broke up with Sean to be with Thomas, I made an unspoken commitment to him. It’s not like being a service Domme. He has to know that I can see to his needs, even when the world is falling apart around us. I just…I need you to help me.”

“Anything.” He offered and she frowned.

“You told me once that you don’t have sex with other men.”

“I don’t.” He said slowly, not liking where this was going.

“Will you? This one time, for me? I’ll be right here the whole time. It’s…well, I know what he needs. It’s not about the pain or the kinky thrill of it, it’s the shame of being taken by another man. He’s adamantly straight. It’s eating him up inside that he’s doubting me. He needs a punishment so out of his comfort zone that it’ll drown out everything else. It’s the only penance that’ll make sense to him until I’m well again.”

Blue sighed. “I don’t know.” He rolled onto his back to gaze at the ceiling.
“It’s always been one of my hard limits.”

“Okay.” She backed down immediately, the mention of hard limits being a language she understood.

“I didn’t say it still was.” He took her hand and laced his fingers between hers and the cast, careful to avoid the cannula hanging from her elbow. “I want this to work, Red. I want us to work. If I want you, that means I have to welcome Thomas into my home and heart too. The two of you come as a package and I completely accept that. It’s just going to take some adjustment.”

“Don’t do this because of that.” She sounded so small and tired. “I’m still not sure that’s ever going to happen.”

“It will.” He squeezed her hand. “You’re mine, Red. You’ve always been mine. I’ll do whatever I have to and whatever I can to prove it to you, but that’s not what this is about. I can’t love you and not love him too. He’s part of you and loving isn’t exactly a voluntary thing, in case you haven’t noticed.” In the bathroom, the shower shut off and they heard footsteps on the wet tile. “I’ll do this because I want to.” Rolling onto his side, he kissed her cheek. “Just give me a few minutes to wash up.”

“Sure.”

By the time he’d returned from a quick shower and scrubbing his teeth, Thomas had changed Noelle into an old T-shirt of Blue’s that she’d stolen ages ago and never returned. It came almost to her knees and he couldn’t stop the broad grin on his face when he saw it. He’d had no idea that she slept in it. The thought pushed all kinds of buttons, mostly the ones that made him think of him caressing her naked skin all night long.

She gave him a searching glance and he nodd
ed. He was surprising himself with how okay he was with what was about to happen. He wanted her and he’d learned the hard way that he’d pay any price to get her. It wasn’t as though it was even a hardship – it was just a new twist on a kink he’d shared before. This wasn’t his first menage rodeo. He might even enjoy it.

“Thomas, I’m not very happy with you.” Her voice had dipped low and silken, the soft purr of a
Domme in absolute control.

“Mistress?” Thomas dropped to his knees, his head bowed. “If I have displeased you, I-…”

“I’m not displeased, I’m disappointed. Look at me.” At the quiet command, he raised his gaze to hers, trembling from head to toe.

“I’m so sorry, Mistress.”

“Have I not loved you, Thomas? Have I not given you all that you have dreamed of?”

“Yes
, Mistress!”

“Then why do you not trust me to take away your anxiety?” She shook her head as much as the pain would allow. “Why do you work yourself up in silence? Why do you allow yourself to think that I am too damaged to help you? Am I not strong?”

“You’re the strongest person I know.” He was shrinking in on himself.

“Then you should have trusted me with your fears, Thomas. You should have trusted me to have a backup plan. I am always,
always
in control.”

“I’m so sorry.” He prostrated himself on the floor.

“It’s not enough.” The quiet chill in her voice made even Blue’s spine tingle. “Bring me your key, Thomas.”

“M…Mistress?” Abject horror crossed his face, even though his feet were already carrying him towards the rosewood box on the dresser.

“You heard me. Bring me your key.” When he presented it to her, she didn’t take it. “Remove your cage.” She ordered in a voice so soft Blue could barely hear it.

“Mistress, please!” He was all out crying now that the security of his cage was being threatened.

“I won’t ask again, Thomas.”

His hands trembled and shook as he struggled to get the tiny key into the equally tiny padlock on the steel device around his cock.
Eventually the pieces came apart and he presented them to her, struggling to contain himself.

“Put them on the bedside table and
get on the bed, Thomas, on your hands and knees.” The sub scrambled to obey in a flurry of tears and desperation to please. “Rest your head on my stomach.” She was so icy, so perfectly in control. It was so discordant with the mellifluous pitch and tone of her vocal chords that it was almost eerie. Even Blue was surprised. He’d seen her buzzing and he’d seen her taking subs to task, but this was on another level, one he hadn’t known she was capable of.

Thomas eased his forehead onto her stomach, terrified that he would hurt her somehow, but she didn’t even flinch. “Tell me why you will accept this punishment.” She commanded and the sub’s body shuddered with his sobs.

“Because I didn’t trust you to care for me while you were hurt, Mistress. Because I forgot how strong you are.”

“You will remember this next time.” She held his gaze for a long, long time while he waited for the axe to fall, wondering what punishment she had planned.
“Blue?”

“Yes, Red?” He’d been so mesmerised, he’d almost forgotten he was supposed to take part.

“Fuck him. Hard.”