Authors: Isabell Lawless
“Vernon taught them how to be boys, so I had to teach them how to be soft and romantic for the ladies. If Greg and Andy would have stayed around Vernon all the time there wouldn't be any wives or daughter-in-laws in this household. Believe me. I'm glad he wooed you over, darling.”
Listening to Jo and drinking the cup of coffee Vernon so nicely made them, she felt rock after rock roll of her shoulders and tumbled out the door. This, right here, was safety. This was family. This was love. No judging, no arguing, no yelling. Only support and a lot of logical problem solving. Especially with a cup of Joe. With that anyone could lay the world at their feet.
Speaking of the devil, back into the room walked a tired looking Andy with a cup of coffee right under his nose and stopped at the side of the couch watching them all together. Vernon in Danielle's favorite chair by the window, and Jo on the couch next to his wife. His beautiful, scared, and beat up wife. '
Where had his vivacious bride gone? How the hell could he stop this suffering?'
“Mom, dad.” He said. “I've been thinking. We'll head up the coast to the cabin for a few days to make sure we're safe while the police procedures take place, and until we know it's safe to return home. God damn I hate the fact that we have to escape our own freakin' house, but he's already been in here once creating nothing but fucking mess and awfulness. I'm not even sure we're alone right now, but who the hells knows?” He continued, gulping down his coffee, looking tiredly out the side window of the living room. With his blonde haired eyebrows knitted together, and a hand in his pocket, he turned to Vernon, who watched his son deliberations with both genuine interest and worry,
“Is the rifle still in the safe at the cabin?”
“Now don't do anything stupid, son. That rifle is just for protection, not hunting. Sure not made for man-hunting in woods.”
Vernon let his coffee cup rest on his leg and pointed a strong finger up at Andy. His mom chimed in as well.
“Honey, it would do no one any good if you ended up in prison. Let's calm down for right now and you can leave tomorrow morning when it's bright outside. It is after all Danielle's thirtieth birthday today, so instead of going all FBI -bust on this evening let's open some gifts. We can't do anything else about this now anyway. It's too late to leave, and being here all together seems safe enough.
"Mom, no one wants to open fucking presents at this time!" Andy snapped back at his mom.
"Excuse me, young man." Jo's voice came out in a sizzle. "You better watch your language. I know you're hurting but never do I want to hear those words come out of your mouth again. I raised you better than that. Do you hear me?"
"Yes, mom. Sorry." Andy's apologetic look fell to the floor, as if he was embarrassed for his outbreak. It had been a rough evening for everyone so far. "It's just that it's so
not
time to open freakin' presents after being hit in the face. I mean, look at her."
"Hey! I'm right here." Danielle said annoyingly, painful eyebrows furrowing at the third person subjective talk above her head.
"Don't talk over my head. I'm not a baby. And yeah, perhaps it is the right time for opening gifts. I should celebrate my big milestone birthday, right? Not let Brian win this time around. Again. Man, he does everything possible to ruin everything for me, for us. In fact I'm amazed he even remembered to pick this day for a new assault, remembering he never knew when my birthday was while were where together all those years."
Jo leaned over and grabbed the wet towel from her fist.
"Oh, that was just bullshit darling. Of course he knew. He was just playing you all along."
She knew she was correct. Brian used to pretend every single of her birthday over the years was just a day like any other. No congratulations, no presents. During one of the birthdays over the years, she braved herself enough to actually ask where her present was, and reminded him that it was normal courtesy to actually say 'happy birthday' when someone had a birthday. He just smiled and called her materialistic, swung around and walked away.
That one year she had been furious, and almost kicked him out the door and into his car to go and get her something, and somehow that action made her believe that perhaps she was stupidly materialistic. Who would ever demand such a thing? But, at the same time, hell no. A birthday accompanies a gift, usually. Possibly even a little cake, a cookie, or perhaps a little crumb of pie. She never got any of those things.
An hour later, he was back. She remembered sitting at the kitchen table, a dark look smothered her face. Watching him walk inside the hallway carrying her presents she wished her look was lethal. Holding the three foot green cactus in his hand, and a random miniscule black candle light lantern in the other, she wished she could have just murdered him right there and gotten away with it.
The gifts were placed on the floor of the kitchen. "Happy Birthday." He said simply before walking upstairs locking himself into his office for the rest of the afternoon.
God she hated him. Even more than she hated the large cactus standing tall in the middle of the floor, taking up floor space with its vicious looks of dark green and sharp thorns. The black lantern was so small in size it disappeared behind the flower pot. Ogling the size of it, she would be surprised if even a small tea light candle could fit inside it. With sturdy glass and black brass it better resembled a lantern to be put outside withstanding weather and wind. Somewhere outside, like a cemetery.
"Are you fucking kidding me?"
She thought
. "He bought me a freaking cemetery lantern, and a spiky cactus. Should I take a hint here?"
She refused to acknowledge the evil message he may have sent. She wasn't sure, and she didn't dare asking about it either. Better just leave it alone for now.
Swallowing the last sip of her coffee, she slowly sauntered over to the gifts standing on the kitchen floor. The silence of the house made the eerie scene in front of her eyes look like something from a Hitchcock horror movie. She was just waiting for a flock of crows to pound through the glass windows, or someone to stab her from behind.
Yeah, he had succeeded. Somehow he made her feel like she was being materialistic. Laughing her right in the face, penetrating her using his killer look. He told her to stop focusing on ridiculous things like gifts. Damn him for playing tricks. Damn his mind games. Damn him for being so good at it. His vicious talent wrapped her snug around his pinky, twiddling her any way he wanted. A dance she found it difficult to break away from. She was always swirled back in tightly. Perhaps the saying was true, "keep your friends close but your enemies closer." Where she was, she couldn't get any closer.
"Can I please have a glass of wine instead of this coffee?” Danielle announced, putting the cup of coffee on the table. “A big glass of wine. Please pour it in that hilariously large wine glass we use to put our keys in. I just washed it so it should be on the kitchen sink drying. It's like it knew I needed it for something else but placing keys in tonight." Danielle rose out of the plush couch and let Jo hold on to the wet towel.
"Why are you still sitting here, didn't you hear me?" She asked Andy, who in total surprise of her outburst turned to his mom for an explanation to what his woman was doing?
Jo simply smiled, handed over the wet towel to her son, and shoved him in the direction of the kitchen. Andy stumbled out of the room and left his parents and Danielle to roam through the neatly stacked gifts on the side table. Jo read gift tags and helped Danielle open envelopes and read cards, while Vernon sunk down even lower in Danielle's favorite chair by the window once more and watched the two women go crazy unwrapping gifts and throw lengths of shiny wrapping papers across the room behind them.
Andy came back into the room to join in on the gift unwrapping frenzy that was occurring. Jo immediately turned around to grab the hilariously large tumbler of wine from his hand. But before handing the glass over to her jittery daughter-in-law she took a large gulp of the sparkling wine herself. Danielle was about to open the last few gifts, but turned around to receive the wine Jo was handing her. It tasted like the elixir of life. In one sitting she downed half of the fill, her head tilted back, making sure not to miss a single drop of the chilled drink, just to return back to the gift table deciding which present to go after next.
Andy looked from Vernon, to Jo, eyes asking for a little explanation of what the hell was going on with Danielle.
"Relax son, she's had a trying day. Let her be." Jo patted her son on the shoulder. "Why don't you go and open another bottle of wine and get me a glass of it as well. Try to relax. Have a beer. Join your dad and recline back. It can't get any worse than this tonight anyway, so nothing else to do than roll with the punches and leave for the cabin early in the morning when the sun gets up."
Vernon stood up from his seat and passed the two ladies eyeing gifts and drinking wine to hand his son a cold beer from the fridge.
"Relax.” He said sternly. “We'll leave tomorrow morning as early as possible. It's just too much of a risk driving up to the cabin in the dark. I doubt Brian will show up here at the house again, seeing there are more people here than the two of you. You still have your gun right, son?"
Everyone's chill reactions to the day's events were too much for Andy to take in. He about downed the cold beer in one gulp, wiped his mouth with the top of his hand, before handing the empty bottle back to his dad. Standing ready to serve him another.
"Yeah, I do" He said. "It's loaded but in the safe. Did that after he came to visit the first time." His vacant hand was suddenly filled with another cold glass bottle and Vernon sat down next to him on the couch. "Probably shouldn't drink and use guns though... right, dad?"
"It's not like we're getting hammered here.” Vernon responded. “Just taking the edge off for tonight. Try not to think too much into it. As I said, we're leaving tomorrow morning, but for now just let Danielle open her presents and drink as much wine as she wants. It will cheer her up a bit. Alright?"
"Alright, whatever you say."
"Loosen up son. It's okay to
not
be a good guy all the time. To those who deserve it, I mean."
Andy stared at his dad for a long time, sitting next to him on the couch. It was as if he suddenly saw him in a new light. His strong but gentle, somewhat conservative dad, who raised him and his siblings with a firm but warm hand was suddenly telling him to stop being so good.
"You're strange dad.” He blurted out. “I've never heard you say that before in my life. You always taught us exactly what was right and wrong, and how important good manners were. But here you are telling me to stop doing all those things. I'm confused." He shook his head.
"No, I'm not telling you to stop doing any of those things. They're all still very important. I'm just telling you how well a solid punch in the face can work on those who need it."
"You've done that?” Andy's eyebrows shot up in surprise. “You're like a gentle giant. At least that's what mom calls you, from what I've heard."
"Once, only once, have I executed that punch I want you to deliver into Brian's pasty face. While dating your mom in college, there was this one guy who would never leave your mom alone. Sent her flowers, notes to her apartment, and made a few unannounced visits begging her to let him inside. He just wouldn't take no for an answer."
"Oh my God really, about mom?"
"One late night he decided to make one of those visits, but unfortunately for him it was one of the nights I stayed over, and I knew all about what was going on. I had no clue who this guy was, or if he was largely built or not, but even before I went down the stairs to open the front door I'd made the decision to punch the lights out on that fucker. Excuse my language."
"Yeah, go on." His dad was for sure showing a side of himself he never knew existed, and he liked it. This burning rage stirring inside him must come to an end, and he was tired of just waiting as a bystander, not able to take part of the revenge action and make Brian himself suffer. If possible he wanted to take up on his dad's advice immediately.
"Well, I noticed the guy's silhouette through the frosted glass window in the front door of your mom's apartment building, and as soon as I unlocked the door he grabbed it from the other side pulling it open. That was the moment I knew I had to follow through with my plan. It was like my arm was moving automatically without my own knowledge. It surprised both me and the other guy as my fist met his face straight on and broke his nose. He tumbled backwards, his bloody face in his hands. He looked at me in stunned silence, my fist still high in the air, and I remember telling him that he could get another taste of that if he ever decided to come back."