Awakening (The Magic of the Black Forest Book 2) (28 page)

I looked sincerely into his eyes, “Bradley, I so desperately need to feel your arms wrapped tightly around me…” He instantly went to fulfill my wish but I stopped him by pressing my hand against his chest. “My entire body longs for you, but I’m not ready. I don’t want to lead you on or tease you. If it’s too much for you to be in
our
bed, our bare bodies touching, to hold me tightly while kissing me…” I blushed as I rambled on, “…then I’ll understand if you don’t want to. Right now this is all I can do.”

My eyes started to fill with tears. “Right now, Bradley, this is what I need from you.” I showed him an image of us without having sex. This time I didn’t stop him from reaching out and fulfilling my need tenfold. For the first time in a long time I slept without having a dream, good or bad.

I woke to the sound of Bradley’s horrified gasp. My eyes whipped open, sitting up I searched the room.
“What Bradley, what’s wrong?”

When he didn’t respond I looked at him. He stared at my body with a disgusted look on his face. I covered up, saddened by his stare.

“I’m not… it’s you, Natalia. You’re beautiful. It’s the bruises. I hadn’t seen them until now.” He jumped into bed next to me and wrapped his arms around me. “I’m sorry for what he did to you and for my rude reaction.”

I got up and walked over to the mirror then opened the blanket to see for myself. I did look disgusting with all the bruises, in all the wrong places. I couldn’t imagine what he was thinking. Covering myself back up, I returned to our bed and gazed into his gorgeous eyes.

“Had you not saved me when you did, it would have been far worse. He tried to rape me but I was able to fight him off until you…” I paused, thinking about that for a moment.

Although I couldn’t use my magic to throw him off me, I had been able to stop him from penetrating me. I recalled those moments, remembering that he tried several times, but he couldn’t. That’s when he’d hit me over and over again. And, that’s why I had the bruises on my inner thighs and buttocks, from him trying to force himself into me. Had Bradley not saved me when he did Andrew would have won. I was becoming too exhausted to fight back. Looking over at Bradley I wanted to tell him what had happened, but from the shocked, disgusted expression on his face I unintentionally showed him. I put up my shield.

“Please don’t do that. Although I can feel your emotions, they are quite confusing right now. They’re hard for me to read.”

As he requested I let some of my shield down and thought about how it would be nice for the three of us to take a walk.

“Natalia, if you would like to go for a walk I’d be more than happy to fulfill that wish for you, but first, may I ask something of you?”

Nervously I replied with, “Sure, what?”

“May I kiss you?” I could tell he needed it just as much as I did.

A smile spread across my face, “Yes, of course you may.”

Gently he ran his fingers across my bruised jaw. His eyebrows pressed together, wincing at my memory of that night. “I love you, Mrs. Jenkins.” He leaned over and kissed me. His love for me raced through my entire body.

Pulling me onto his lap, straddling my legs around him, I pressed my naked body gently against his. Gently kissing the bruised area on my jaw, then moving down my throat and back up again. He repeated the path several times. My breathing became loud and rapid.

Forgetting that my shield had been down I imagined having sex with him. The thought had me kissing him more passionately. The soft smooth touch of his hands rubbing up and down my back didn’t help my resolve. Throwing my head back, gasping for air, Bradley’s lips roamed my throat aimlessly. Even though I was scared I wanted to feel his lips on my breasts, I wanted it badly. More than I had realized.

“Natalia…”

I looked into his eyes.
“Would you think less of me if I asked you to do something so soon afterwards?”
My vision blurred from my tears.

“Never, Natalia. But I don’t think you’re ready for that.”

“You’re right; I’m not ready for that. I was thinking…
I really want to feel your lips on my breasts. I am a little frightened, but I’d really like to try.”

“I know, I heard you the first time. Are you sure? I don’t want to frighten you.”

My heart started to race nervously, “I’m hoping you can help me to get him off of me.” I started crying. “I can still feel him on me. I’ve taken many showers and scrubbed myself raw, even jumped into the creek yesterday, and still I feel disgusting and unattractive. I know I’m asking a lot. I’m not ready for us to make love, but I think baby steps will get us there quicker. I know what I said last night but after being in your arms all night I feel a little better.”

He hesitated.

“Please, Bradley…”

Again, he put his fingers on my lips. He stared at them, longing to kiss them.

“As long as you promise to let me feel your emotions and hear your thoughts. I don’t want you worrying about my feelings. And I promise you that no matter what you think I won’t do anything more than that.”

“I promise.”

His lips were on mine in seconds.

Again, he gently kissed my jaw, and began to move slowly down to my breasts. The closer he got, the more my anxiety and fear started to show their ugly selves. He felt it also, so he started to move his lips upwards.

“Bradley, please keep going. I promise I’ll stop you if needed. Please.”

He moaned softly before he murmured, “Are you sure?”

“Please,” I practically begged.

“You are so beautiful.” Gently, he cupped my breasts with his hands. I let out a low, audible gasp. It felt just as I remembered it.

His breathing became unsteady. Against his better judgment, he wrapped his lips around my nipple. The feeling was indescribable. Pure pleasure ran through me. I squeezed him tighter. My breathing became loud and embarrassing. I couldn’t believe what was about to happen. I’d missed him so much.

Unable to control myself I grabbed his hair, pulled his mouth from my breasts, and bit his neck as my body exploded from my orgasm.

Breathless he begged, “Natalia, don’t, please you need to stop.”

I felt his hard shaft on my thigh. I wanted him badly -- no I needed him. I kissed him while reaching my hand down to take hold of him. Between kisses, and before I fully positioned myself over him, I said, “Bradley, I was wrong, I want to try.”

“No, you’re too bruised.” I knew he was more concerned about hurting me. He wanted to. Forgetting I had my shield down, he responded to my thoughts, “Of course I am and of course I do.”

I didn’t give him a chance to finish what he wanted to say. I positioned myself over him and slowly slid his shaft inside me. It felt so good I cried out with pleasure. Tears ran down my face at the thought of never being able to feel this way again.

“I love you,” I cried.

Slowly we moved in sync with each other. Both of us quickly lost control. “Bradley, if you want, right here is okay.” I showed him where I protected myself. Our movements were too slow and his hold to light, frustration built inside.

“Are you sure, Natalia?”

I knew what he meant, “Yes please.”

Slowly he laid me onto the bed and positioned himself on top of me. He watched me closely as he started to penetrate me. My bruised thighs hurt from his thrusts. It caused me to freeze, I even stopped breathing. I opened my eyes to find his full of worry and concern. Seeing it’s him on top of me, a huge smile grew on my face. I lifted my legs higher and grabbed hold of his buttocks.

We started again. It didn’t take long until I started crying out for him, begging for more. He fulfilled my requests and avoided hurting me.

I cried his name a few times before exploding with pleasure. Slowly, so as not to scare me, he pressed his lips on my neck and whispered breathlessly, “Are you sure?” I nodded my head yes.

As his razor sharp teeth penetrated my skin I once again cried out with ecstasy. I felt him release after thrusting his shaft deep inside one last time. He moaned, continuing to suck on my neck.

I was stunned by how I felt next. My feelings changed from happiness to fear in seconds after we finished. I don’t know why but I suddenly wanted him to get off of me. My voice trembling I whimpered, “Bradley, please get off.” He was already moving before I even finished my request. Just as he was off, my feelings changed again. “Boy this is so confusing.”

“You’re not kidding. Suddenly, it feels like you want me back on top of you. Your feelings are all over the place.” He once again fulfilled my needs and held me. “You weren’t ready yet. It was wonderful all the same, but you weren’t ready. I went against my instincts and let you seduce me but…” He lifted my face forcing my eyes to look into his, “…it won’t happen again until
I
feel you’re ready. My job is to protect you, even if it’s from yourself. It’ll be easier for me if you don’t do that again. You know how painful it is for me when I have to tell you no.” He kissed my nose and lifted us from the bed. “Let’s go for that walk.”

Chapter 13

Bradley meant what he said. There has been no sex whatsoever for weeks. Every day and night was the same. In the morning he woke me with a kiss and immediately jumped out of bed.  All day long he kept me busy, exhausting me with a variety of activities. In the evening he refused to come to bed until I fell asleep or when he did, he was fully clothed.

Since Dave and Cheryl were still working on Bill’s vampire training, Bradley and Dave were getting behind with their orders. So Bradley recruited Jesse and me to help him. If we weren’t working, we went hiking and even painted the downstairs. I wanted to use my magic to help get him caught up and to paint but he insisted that we do it the normal way.

Doing things without magic was his way of keeping me busy so that I’d be too tired to do anything else, especially sex. He’s concerned that it’s too soon. I’ve tried to tell him several times that I was ready, but he says I’m not.

The next time we were alone I decided to bring it up nonchalantly over a cup of coffee. “How do you know I’m not ready? I know me… I’m ready, Bradley.”

“You’re very persistent, I’ll give you that,” he laughed, making his eyes sparkle.

I scowled at him, “What makes you think you know me better?”

Bradley’s rejecting me was getting very frustrating. Every time I attempted to touch him sexually he walked away or held my hands against my sides, telling me no. He should know by now that I don’t like to be told no.

When he didn’t respond right away I thought he was considering it. Boy was I wrong. Taking hold of the bottom of my chair, he pulled it close to him, startling me. He placed his finger under my chin and looked directly into my eyes to scan my thoughts. When he did this he had a faraway look.

Seeing something he liked, he blinked and smiled. “I love you, too,” he said before he went back to reading. Shortly after invading my privacy, he blinked again, “No, Natalia, you’re not ready.” The muscles in his jaw tightened as the stress from what he saw spread across his face.

I crossed my arms over my chest, “Ugh!” I got up, started to walk out, but he grabbed and pulled me onto his lap. Fear jolted through me. He dropped his hands to his side but didn’t remove me from his lap.

“I apologize for doing it that way. My love, you still have nightmares. Sometimes when you’re sleeping and I touch you, you scream for me to get off… to let you go. And I’m not even touching you sexually.” He shook his head from side to side then shrugged his shoulders. “What kind of husband would I be if I ignored that just to satisfy my needs?” He answered his own question, “Not a very good one.”

The conversation caused him anxiety. I’m not going to win this round, so lifting his arms, I placed them around me and kissed his sexy lips, “Thank you for knowing what I need better than me.”

“It’s my job… you are my life. Without you I am nothing.”

“I feel the same way about you. Bradley, you do know that I will never fully get over it. Years from now something could happen that could make me freak out. He wins every time we don’t touch each other. It’s what he wanted, he didn’t want us together. I worry that we’ll lose each other.”

He tightened his embrace and snuggled me against him, “Don’t ever worry that you’ll lose me because of what he did. He hasn’t won. I’ll wait as long as it takes.” Before I could debate him there was a knock at the door.

“Great…” I crowed. I got up to answer the door, but he pulled me back onto his lap.

“The door can wait.” He grazed his fingers over my cheek and tenderly kissed me. “It’s Jesse and Colleen. I thought I’d take you out for a good time tonight. Maybe… we can try when we get back. Let’s see how tonight goes. Okay?”

“We’re going out?”

“Yes, I wanted to surprise you. Are you surprised?”

“Yes, I’m surprised.” I looked down at myself, at what I was wearing. Jeans and a faded t-shirt just weren’t going to do. Not if I wanted our evening to end on a good note. “I have to go and get changed.” We got up and he took my hand, guiding me with him to answer our door.

“Hey guys, how’s it going?”

Colleen ran through the door beaming with joy and hugged me. I couldn’t help but laugh.

“The guys are taking us out tonight. How do you like my new dress?” She twirled several times to show it off.

“Hey, Nat.” Jess leaned over Colleen to greet me with a brotherly kiss.

“Hi, Jesse. What’s in the box?” The box had a big green bow on it. Colleen started to pout. “Your dress is beautiful, Coll. It looks amazing on you.”

Jumping up and down she clapped saying, “Yeah, I know. That box is for you.”

Clearing his throat, Bradley, got everyone’s attention. “Colleen, do you mind if I tell her I got her a gift?”

She rolled her eyes sarcastically, “Sorry, Brad. Go ahead.”

“I thought you would like something new to wear for tonight’s dinner, especially since I’m taking you to that fancy restaurant you always wanted to go to.” He flashed his famous crooked smile and I felt my knees go weak. At this very moment I didn’t want to go anywhere but into our bedroom. He chuckled and handed me my gift. “It’s nice to know I still make you feel that way. It’s been a while. Here go put this on. I hope you like it.”

I found myself lost in his eyes, willingly. Blushing, I stuttered, “O-okay.”

“Maybe she needs help.” Jess laughed.

“No!” I hollered, startling everyone except Bradley. “I want to try to make myself beautiful and surprise him.”

I spun around to walk to my room and found Bradley standing before me. He’s so quick. I jumped, laughing, “You startled me.” I shoved him playfully, “Paybacks, Bradley, paybacks.” Walking around him, I start to giggle. He playfully grabbed my waist then hesitated to taste my emotions. Electricity from his touch aroused me, I leaned my head back against his chest. “I’m never going to be able to focus on getting ready if you keep making me feel this way.”

“I just wanted to say, you are already beautiful. Don’t be long. Just change your clothes.” He whispered, “I can’t wait to see you in it.” I giggled, walking in to the room.

I opened the box and pulled out a beautiful elegant green dress with spaghetti straps and a slit going up each side. Simply put, perfect for the occasion. He had wonderful taste in clothes, better taste than I did. Excited about tonight, I quickly got dressed. Looking in the mirror, I smiled. There were no bruises left, they were finally all gone. And my breasts looked amazing in this dress. I turned for a side view. It’s hard to believe that they were mine. I grabbed them to check and giggled at myself. I heard a loud booming laugh come from Bradley. I had forgotten he could hear my thoughts.

“Eavesdropping are we? Thank you. It’s beautiful.”

“Please hurry the suspense is killing me
.” By his tone the wait was driving him a little insane.

“How long I take will depend on whether or not you’re going to respect my privacy. Or do I need to put up my shield?”
I teased.

“Natalia, please don’t. I’ll respect it. You haven’t teased me in so long. I can’t wait to wrap my arms around you.”

“Your wait is almost over.
” I giggled.

A few months back Bradley mentioned that he liked how body glitter looked on women so I bought some. Until today I had never had an occasion to wear it. Since my breasts looked fantabulous, I thought now was as good a time as any. Lastly, I wrapped my hair up in a bun. He liked it when I showed off my neck. That’s when I remembered a beautiful choker I purchased the day I got the glitter. It’s a green velvet ribbon with a “J” for my last name, Jenkins, hanging from it. It matched perfectly.

One last look, “Yep, I’m ready.” I walked out into the living room but only Jess and Colleen were there. Disappointed I asked, “Where’s Bradley?” They were both smiling while Colleen was pointing behind me.

Grinning hungrily, Bradley leaned against the wall under the kitchen archway. How could I have missed him? Twirling, I spun around to show it off. When I stopped twirling he was right in front of me. He grabbed hold of me flirtatiously, “How about we stay in tonight?”

I giggled. “No, you’re taking me out.” Hiding myself behind Bradley I grabbed my boobs saying,
“They look amazing, don’t they?”
I laughed again.

“They always do.” I had been pleasantly surprised when he dipped me back and kissed my cleavage. My heart fluttered and I giggled like a schoolgirl. Smiling, I playfully pushed him away.

“Take me out, you Neanderthal.”

Again he let out a booming laugh. We haven’t laughed and teased each other like that for months.

***

The restaurant was what I considered to be high class, so naturally the moment we walked in I felt out of place. Waiting for the host to take us to our seats I noticed that Bradley had been wearing a black suit. The same design that he wore at our wedding except today he’s wearing a green shirt that was identical to the color of my dress. My eyes slowly moved down his body. As I exhaled my breath shook. He was unbelievably gorgeous. As my eyes ascended I became dazzled and felt extremely proud to be standing next to the best looking man in the world. I giggled at my thoughts. When my eyes finally left his glorious body and met his, he was staring down at me with smoldering gaze.

He squeezed my hand,
“You’re incredible.”
Wrapping his arm around my hip, he pulled me in front of him and pressed himself against my backside.
“You look sexy, you smell sexy and your emotions are screaming that you want me. Let’s not forget that I can hear your thoughts. You dazzle me as well my lovely wife.”

“I think I did more than just dazzle you my handsome husband.”
I pressed myself against him teasingly.
“I missed this. I love you
.”

“Me too, but if you continue I won’t be able to walk.”
Laughing, he kissed the back of my head.

They called our name so we couldn’t flirt privately anymore. As we walked to our seats Bradley kept me in front of him. Joking, I tried to walk alongside him. We laughed together as he said, “Oh no you don’t.” The other customers were staring at us and that made me laugh even more.

They sat us in a corner booth, cozy and private. There were no prices on the menu, which meant the food was pricey. When the waitress came up she started to introduce herself until she saw Bradley and Jess.

“Hi guys how are you? I haven’t seen either of you in a long time.” She looked at Bradley coquettishly.

“Another one of your exes? No matter where we go there’s always a girl you know.”
He chuckled.

“How are you, Theresa? Have you met Jesse’s wife, Colleen?”

“No, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” She reached out and shook her hand. “Congratulations.”

Bradley took my hand and placed it on the table, “And this is my beautiful wife, Natalia.”

“Oh,” she said sounding a little disappointed that he was no longer available. “I didn’t know you got married.” She reached over and shook my hand but added no congrats. “Can I get you anything to drink?”

Jesse jumped in to return her rudeness, “No, we’re ready to order,” and he ordered for all three of us.

“Nothing for you Brad,” she asked with a smile, not the least embarrassed by her coquetry.

“No, I’m not hungry. We’re taking our wives out on a double date.” He laughed. “If you could please put our order in that would be great.” He turned and gazed into my eyes. “I’d really like to get her home and out of the dress she’s wearing.” I giggled and felt my face getting hot, turning red. “Right on cue. I love it when you blush like that.” By the time we pried our eyes from each other the waitress had left and Colleen was laughing hysterically.

“That was a heck of a way of blowing her off, Brad.”

“Did you see her face when he said he wanted to get her out of that dress? Priceless!” Jess added.

We had a blast. Every time the waitress came back Bradley did something different. Either he kissed me in a way that should be illegal, kissed my neck or he fed me. It was all very sweet and romantic.

“You don’t have to do this for my benefit. I know you want me and not her. She’s not that pretty anyway.”

“I’m not. I meant every word I said. As for my actions, even if the waitress were a waiter I would still be doing it. I plan on romancing you all night, or as long as you’ll let me.”

“Okay.” I giggled.

“Okay what?” Colleen interrupted. I was so lost in the moment that I hadn’t realized I spoke aloud. “Jess, I’m telling you they can talk to each other without speaking.” Both of them just stared at us. We didn’t deny anything, but we didn’t agree either.

After finishing our main course, eager to get home, Bradley asked us if we were done or did we want desert. His smile outshone everyone else’s.

“I think we’re done. If we stay any longer he’s going to explode,” Jess said mockingly to Colleen.

The waitress wasn’t even to the table when Bradley asked for the check. When she came back she handed it to him. He took it but she didn’t let go, she made one last attempt to offer him her services, “Are
you
sure I can’t get you anything?”