Alma Mater (19 page)

"Laverne and Shirley,"
Jinx added. "Mignon, if you're on boob patrol, I
wonder what Lisa's up to. And for God's sake, don't tell my mother."

"Lisa's no flasher." Mignon liked Lisa, but knew she had a rebellious
streak.

Bunny turned into the drive, slowed to miss Piper, and then parked
the car. Mignon climbed over Vic and ran to embrace the dog.

"I will never have children. I live in fear of my genes," Vic said. She
closed the door after Chris emerged, lightly brushing against her. A
delicious chill ran across Vic's stomach.

"You'll have a house full of them," Bunny predicted. Mignon walked
back to them, her arms raised at shoulder level, shaking her bosoms like a stripper, as she sang the stripper's song from the musical Gypsy.

Jinx called to R. J., "That's it, Mrs. Savedge. Put her on the stage. She can be a stripper."

"Porno movies," Vic said.

R. J., walking to the back door, asked, "Victoria, have you seen
porno movies?"

"Yes, Mother." Vic blushed.

"I can't believe it." R. J. blushed.

As soon as they entered the house, Mignon zoomed straight for
the refrigerator.

"Well, actually, Mrs. Savedge, a bunch of us rented one. It wasn't just Vic. Kind of a girls' stag party," Jinx explained.

"I have never seen such a thing." R. J. seemed genuinely surprised.
"Oh, I have," Bunny airily admitted. "They lack imagination, but,

on the other hand, it does beat playing bridge with the girls."
"Mignon?" R. J. closed the refrigerator door.

"I haven't seen one."

"What a relief. Offer our guests refreshments before you partake of
them yourself."

"Oh, yeah. Sony, Morn." Mignon asked who wanted Cokes or
drinks and filled the orders. Every time her mother's back was turned
she'd perform the stripper shake.

Vic whispered to Chris, "If you did that, I'd tear your clothes off right here in the kitchen."

"You can do it later," Chris whispered back.

"You're talking about me!" Mignon handed Jinx a tall glass of soda
water with a slice of lime.

"You wish." Chris laughed at her.

"But you were talking about breasts. My sister is" —Mignon low
ered her voice— "the only six-foot-one-inch girl in Surry County.
Some of those inches are her boobs."

"You are so out of control." Vic was ready to swat her.

"Mignon, since you have so much energy, I'm going to put it to
good use." R. J. handed her a pair of gardening gloves. "Weed."

"Mom, I'm supposed to go to the game tonight."

R. J. checked the wall clock, a plastic cat whose eyes and tail
moved. "One hour of weeding, a shower, then I'll drop you off back at school."

"I'll help you," Chris volunteered.

"Now, Chris, you sit here and enjoy yourself." R. J. pulled out a chair at the kitchen table.

"Thank you, Mrs. Savedge, but I would enjoy weeding the garden.
I miss gardening."

Vic, Chris, and Mignon weeded while Jinx turned over soil with a
little claw. She then put down a layer of rich, seal-brown mulch.
"Your ears look better," Jinx observed.

"Thanks," Mignon said. "I twist my posts about a thousand times a day. Thanks again for helping me buy them. You, too, Vic, even if you are hateful mean."

"So, Mignon, how did you get Hojo to pierce your ears?" Jinx fig
ured there was more to the story than Mignon was telling.

"Asked her."

"Short answer from a usually long-winded twerp," Jinx observed.

"Hojo thinks she is the last word on fashion. Like, you should see
the cropped fringe top she wears with painted-on jeans, cowboy boots,
and a hat the color of her boots. Paints her fingernails to match. She doesn't always wear a bra either. Wowee."

"You are obsessed with breasts today." Vic laughed.

"It's hard not to notice when they're sticking right out at you, you know. I mean, where can you look? Hojo's got a good body, and she
knows it."

"You just walked up to the reception desk and said, 'Pierce my
ears'?" Jinx thought sooner or later she'd wheedle the truth out of her.

"Kind of. I told her I was a social outcast. Every girl in my class has
pierced ears and Mom and Dad live in the Dark Ages, like, right after
the fall of Rome. It took me a couple of visits because she knew Mom
would be less than thrilled, like frosted Antarctica. But I told her it wouldn't last long. Mom is a very forgiving woman, and did she want me to be warped for life by my high-school experiences? Low self-
esteem. Forever. Bad men." Mignon shuddered.

"Since when have you lacked in the self-esteem department?" Vic
asked as she battled chickweed.

"Look who's talking."

Vic ignored her. Chris stood up, grabbed the wheelbarrow, and
rolled it closer as they'd moved away from it, leaving piles of weeds in
their wake.

Jinx listened as a boat under power tooted to one under sail. A vessel under sail always has the right of way.

"So what do you do when someone flashes you?" Mignon lagged
behind the others in weeding.

"No one has ever flashed me," Vic said. "Come on, Mignon, work
harder. You are a lazy ass as well as keeping us
abreast
of the times."

"We are so funny." Mignon minced about. "1 know Marjorie
Solomon is going to do it again."

"Don't look," said Jinx, offering sensible advice.

"Wear sunglasses," suggested Chris, gathering weed piles and toss
ing them in the wheelbarrow.

"Yeah. Great idea. I can see everyone, but they don't know I'm
looking. That is so cool."

"Ray-Bans," Jinx said. "Sleek."

"I'll wear them in the shower in gym class, too. Surrounded by
boobs. The really big ones are the worst, and Itsi Giorgianis has hair
around her nipples. Can you stand it? I would die! I would shave every
night. I would risk cutting off my own nipples."

"Puh-lease!" Vic threw weeds at her sister.

"It's just personal hygiene. Aunt Bunny had her upper lip waxed
and a bikini wax—oh, ouch—so why can't Itsi get her tits waxed?"

"Because she knows you want to look at her," Jinx said, laughing. "I do not." Mignon let out a small scream of disgust.

"It's okay, Mignon. You're my little sister. I love you no matter
what." Vic feigned sincerity.

"Me, too. I have lots of gay friends. You can be my newest gay
friend." Jinx reached the end of the rose bed.

"I would die!" Mignon's voice approached her upper limits.
"Bet you wouldn't," Chris teased her.

"I know you give Charly blow jobs, Vic."

Vic advanced on Mignon, who threw up her hands. She was no
match for her taller, powerful sister. "I do not."

"I saw you this summer. He had his hands all over you."

"That doesn't constitute a hummer, Mignon." Jinx sank the spade into the mulch pile.

"If she jerks him off, she sucks him off."

"First off, you little asshole, I don't. But this is no way to talk in
front of Chris. It's wearing thin, you know."

Mournfully, Mignon asked, "Hasn't anyone here even given a guy
a blow job? I want to know all about it."

"Ask Hojo," Vic fired back.

"If she pierced your ears, she'll show you how to do it," Jinx added.
"No teeth."

"Gr0000ss!"

"You're the one who wants to know about blow jobs," Chris re
minded her, cleaning up the debris to her satisfaction.

"I do. I'm left out. Marjorie has great tits, and everyone knows it.
She can get any boy she wants. Lisa has boys all over her. I'm like the
slug of the tenth grade."

"Hey, I'm twenty-two, and I'm not doing anything. Besides, doing
it just to do it is really uncool." Jinx was sympathetic.

"Yeah," Mignon agreed, but with little conviction. "If you did it, though, you'd tell me, wouldn't you?"

"Sure." Jinx laughed.

"Not me. You can't keep a secret," Vic taunted her.

"I can. I'm already keeping secrets."

Later the three college girls drove Mignon down to the high-

school football game
_;
then they trolled around town in the Impala, top
down. With the three of them in the front seat, Vic could drive with her right arm around Chris. Jinx put her left arm around Chris so it looked okay.

By the time the game was over, Mignon back in the car, Vic's heart
was blasting away. She could feel the pounding all over, especially in
her crotch. She wondered how men functioned with a hard-on be
cause the sensation she was feeling was pleasurable and painful.

While Mignon chattered away, Jinx, now in the backseat, rested
her head back to stare at the stars. She envied Vic and Chris. She didn't
envy them being women together, but she envied that physical con
nection, that excitement. She worried that she would never find it.

₀

nce everyone finally crawled into bed, Vic waited for fifteen
minutes and then bade Jinx good night. She opened the door quietly to the guest room, whisper
ing, "I thought I'd die. I thought they'd never go to bed." She closed
the door behind her, locking it.

Just then a note slipped under the door between the guest room and
Mignon's room. Vic retrieved it. Chris whispered, "She's relentless."

Vic scribbled, "Get lost!" on the note.

Chris said, "You can't do that. She'll know you're in here."
"Forgot." Vic's eyebrows shot upward.

"This ought to do it." Chris wrote, on a new sheet of paper, "Going
to sleep. See you in the morning."

Vic shoved it under the door. To be sure, she carefully picked up the chair from behind the small desk and wedged it under the doorknob of the shared door. She switched off the small lamp by the bed and pulled up the covers, feeling the cool, clean sheets.

"Come here." Chris reached for her, pulling Vic onto her. She
wrapped her arms around her neck, kissing her.

Try as they might, a few muffled moans escaped their lips. Enough to alert Mignon, who put her eye to the keyhole but couldn't see any
thing because of the dark. She listened intently. Someone was in there
with Chris. She opened the door to the hall, tiptoed to the guest-room