“
Dad, stop this!”
“
What is it you want her to do, my boy?”
Her father was enjoying himself. It was a rare opportunity
that
he got to gang up against Rebecca.
“
Jono and Jackie want to have their wedding anniversary party
at this place in the mountains. They have invited 10 people to
spend the weekend with them and Rebecca does not want to
go.”
“
Leave it to me.” He winked at Clayton.
“
Dad, you are definitely going too far.”
“
Sweetpea, we are just teasing you. You looked so tense.
Relax. You and Clayton sit here and your mother and I will go to
bed. Come honey.”
They
left the room, but Rebecca knew they would wait up for
her.
“
I like your parents. They have such an intimate relationship.
I have never seen a couple like that before.”
“
Yes, but they also know how to drive me crazy. Sorry about
earlier okay?”
His eyes
were a dark blue now and he looked at her.
“Okay, but... no. As you
r father says, I must charm
you. Will it work
, Rebecca?
Will my charm help?”
He said
it so softly, she barely heard him. He picked up her hand and
kissed it lightly. There was no electric shock and he was a little
disappointed.
“
Yes”, she whispered.
Clayton was surprise
d. He had expected her to shout
at him, or say something else. She turned his hand over in
hers.
“
Clayton, why do you always have ink on your hand?”
“Ink?”
“There”, she put her finger on the spot and the electric
shock hit him again. This time it was stronger
and he pulled
his hand away.
“
It is not ink. It is a birth mark. I have always had it.
Rebecca, why does your touch shock me?”
“
I don’t know, Clayton. I don’t know.” He kept looking at her.
Dark blue eyes again.
“Clayton what are you thinking? Your eyes
have that
look again.
”
“
What look?”
“
They get dark blue, then you ask me something difficult, or
you accuse me. What is to come, question or accusation?”
“Question.
Do you want to be with me?”
“Oh
okay. That is definitely a dark blue question. Yes.”
“So why
do you turn away from me?
”
“
Another dark blue question.”
His eyes
were changing now, a light, icy colour.
“
Rebecca, don’t tease me now, okay? No teasing, no
lies.”
“
Because we will hurt each other and I could not bear it.
That’s the way it is, isn’t it?”
Clayton
saw the pain in her eyes and he turned suddenly and held her. He
had wanted so desperately to do that, to comfort her and she
collapsed in his arms. He liked the feeling of comfort he gave
her.
“
Rebecca.....”
“No more dark blue questions, please. I
t is my turn.
Why did you ask me about the butterfly?
”
“What?” Icy blue eyes again.
Shit, wrong question,
Rebecca.
“
Never mind. It is not important. Leave it. No more questions
tonight, okay?”
“What are you avoiding, Princess? What lies behind
those
sparkling black eyes?
”
He
moved her away from him, lifted her face and looked into her eyes.
Her saw the fear in her and he let it go.
She is afraid of me. I should never
have asked about the butterfly.
Correction. I should never have
accused
her about the
butterfly
.
She closed her eyes and he said, “okay, relax. No more dark
blue questions
,” and he
smiled. His eyes were their bright blue again. The moment had
passed.
“I
think I had better go before things get all messy again. Rebecca, I
want to talk
about this, okay?
”
“
Okay.”
He got
up and she walked him to the door and she heard it, hissing
outside. It had moved to the side of the house, away from where her
parents were.
“
Rebecca, go inside. You should not be outside alone. Good
night.”
His voice
had been curt. Had he heard it? Had it
scared him?
She threw herself on the couch.
Oh God, what can I do? Can I destroy
that horrible thing on my own? I have to find a way. I have to have
Clayton. He was too wonderful. Yes, there must be a way to kill
that miserable fucker!
She got up, agitated and plotted and schemed.
There must be a
way,
she convinced
herself
.
She went to
bed, filled with fantasies of torture and pain for the creature.
None of her plans were even close to realistic, but they made her
feel better.
Oh Clayton, don’t give up on
me
yet.
*****
Clayton was also in despair. As he was leaving her house he
had felt that tug again of some urge to protect her. He knew it was
not rational. She was safe in her house and her parents were there.
Anyway, what could she possibly need protection from except
him?
What is
wrong with me?
He had
held her and it had been so magnificent. He had touched her and he
had loved it. He had also enjoyed the ‘shock treatment’.
Imagine what the
sex would be like.
He
had to get her away to Jonathan and Jackie’s anniversary. H
e
would make love to her there and they would shock each other to
high heaven. This thought made him smile and he almost forgot about
the fear for her safety, but not for long. He got up in the middle
of the night, shocked by his dreams.
Rebecca was bound
with thin, silken ropes that he
could hardly see. He had just stood there, not seeing them. She was
crying out to him, for help, but he could not understand what she
was saying.
Use
your hands, Clayton, please
, she screamed, but he did not understand. He stood
there helpless, unable to protect her. The dream felt so real that
he woke up and could not figure out where he was.
That was
awful
. He got out of bed and paced in his apartment. He walked
round and round, in his slow, deliberate way, his short hair spiky
on his head, his blue eyes focused.
If
Rebecca could see him now, she would have seen why Nana had called
him the white tiger. He was exactly that as he paced. He needed to
do something. He knew that Rebecca was tied to his life somehow and
he realized he had to do something. The butterfly has something to
do with it. He knew she had tried to pretend it was not important,
but she had asked him about it. She also wanted to know. The
question was why was it important to her? Did it also comfort her?
Who had made it for her? Who had the capacity to know how it
looked? It was on her back, so the person had to know exactly what
they were doing. Rebecca could not have been much help.
What is all this?
Why am I behaving like this?
Also, his connection with her father was disturbing. It cut
deep in him. Even when the man joked with him, about looking after
his daughter, he knew it meant something. He had not been joking.
He had laughed with George, but Clayton knew there was more to it.
He realized that she was not afraid of him. She always stood her
ground with him and flashed her black eyes at him. She was afraid
of someone or something else.
Why won’t she just tell me? Why won’t she give me
the thing I need, the honesty? Oh Rebecca,
he lamented
, please, don’t lie to me. I can’t stand
it.
He
went to work in the morning, determined to get some answers from
her. Her father had been right. If he simply went there, demanding
answers, she would flash her eyes and shut off. He would have to do
this the long, patient way. He
would have to charm her, and
when ‘her defenses are down, wham!’ her father had said. This was
all new to him. He never dealt with people like this. He walked
into their lives, got what he wanted and walked right out. Rebecca
was not to be treated that way. She would get the better side of
him, the gentle, caring man he had forgotten resided somewhere deep
inside him.
When Jonathan saw him, he was very perturbed. “What kind of
date did
you
have? God,
you look awful. Did you misbehave? Any accusations,
butterfly
, lion?
”
“Jono, not now. I
feel
awful. What
are you doing? I need a long talk.”
“
Hold on. I need to drop off these documents. Come to my
office in five minutes. We will go somewhere private.”
He
went to Jonathan’s office and Clayton
sat slumped on the
chair. He was so tired, but also so desperate to get beyond this
confusion. He had already started his work on Rebecca. He sent a
bright, yellow pot plant to her office this morning. She loved
plants and he knew she would appreciate it. It had taken him
some 30 minutes to construct a
suitable note. Eventually, it had been two simple
lines:
Princess,
thanks for a great dinner.
Sorry about the dark blues, C.
Clayton phoned his secretary, and told her he would be out
for a while. She seemed to accept this. For once, she did not
demand an explanation. Jonathan had gone into
an office downstairs and phoned
Jackie.
“It is worse than we thought. There is definitely something
wrong. He really looks like an animal now. Hi
s eyes are wild
and he can’t sit still. He wants to talk. What should I
do?
”
“Nothing, darling, just listen. Please do not argue with
him and rationalize things. Just listen, okay? I have to go. See
you later. Just listen.”
They went out into the bright
sun and Clayton put on
his dark glasses. It was too bright and his eyes hurt. They went to
the park and Clayton told his story. He told Jonathan everything,
the shocks, the arguments, the dream, the father. He left out
nothing and Jonathan had such a vivid image of the events that he
felt as though he had been there.
“
Clayton, is it possible that there is something wrong with
you, not her?”
“
Why?”
“Because you
did
growl like a lion that night. I swear. Your hair stood up.
Your whole body was different. Your eyes were
almost white.
I know. I was there. You see, she was perfectly okay. That’s why I
think it must be you.
”
“
Yes, I have these funny urges. She seems all right, except
she is scared.”
“Of being hurt, Clayton, of being hurt. Let’s face it. You
are not the gentlest
man when it comes to women, are you?
‘
Hit-and-run’?”
“
Yes, but she knows I won’t do that to her.”
Jonathan just raised his eyebrows.
Jackie is going to kill me for
arguing and rationalizing
.
“
Clayton, why is the butterfly so important to
you?”
“I
don’t know. I
don’t know. I just feel it. I feel there is
something I need to do. She knows what it is. I can see her
withdrawing when I try to ask her.
”
“
Why not ask her parents?”
“Because she would kill me and then both of them. Because I
want her to trust me, to
be honest with me. I want it from
her, not her parents, or anyone else. I
need
it from her. Jono, I love this woman. No, it is not just
sex. I feel her right inside of me and she feels me
too.”
“One more thing, Clayton, this shocking business. I don’t
think
I understand. I am thinking that it only happens when
your hands
are on her body. You hugged her
and nothing happened. Is it you? Too much male hormone or
something?”
“
Yes, that is possible. I never thought about it that
far.”
“Also, how did you know the waiter
was going to
spill the wine?
”
“
I did not know.”
“If I do
a rough estimate, you were about here? She was about here? And the
waiter, where?”
“
Here, just over her shoulder.”
“Okay, now, if the glass was about to spill, you moved from
here? To here?
Before it spilled? That is impossible, my
friend, unless you knew the glass would fall. In which case, you
would have arisen from your seat like this, leaned over and caught
it. The other option is that you were sitting right next to her, in
which case it might have been possible.
”