A Second Chance Love
A Totally Bound Publication
A Second Chance Love
ISBN #
978-1-78430-232-0
©Copyright T.K. Paige 2014
Cover Art by Posh Gosh ©Copyright September 2014
Edited by Jennifer Douglas
Totally Bound Publishing
This is a work of fiction. All characters, places and events are from the author’s imagination and should not be confused with fact. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, events or places is purely coincidental.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any material form, whether by printing, photocopying, scanning or otherwise without the written permission of the publisher, Totally Bound Publishing.
Applications should be addressed in the first instance, in writing, to Totally Bound Publishing. Unauthorized or restricted acts in relation to this publication may result in civil proceedings and/or criminal prosecution.
The author and illustrator have asserted their respective rights under the Copyright Designs and Patents Acts 1988 (as amended) to be identified as the author of this book and illustrator of the artwork.
Published in 2014 by Totally Bound Publishing,
Newland House, The Point, Weaver Road, Lincoln, LN6 3QN
Warning:
This book contains sexually explicit content which is only suitable for mature readers. This story has a
heat rating
of
Totally Burning
and a
Sexometer
of
2.
A SECOND CHANCE LOVE
T.K. Paige
Years after losing her husband, Kerri Johnston is surprised to find love again with the two men she never knew were there all along.
Two years ago when Kerri Johnston buried her husband Caleb after a tragic car accident, his best friends Kyle and Jacob came to her rescue. Taking her back to their ranch with them, they gave her a fresh start and a friendship she desperately needed. But after her grief fades Kerri realizes her feelings for her two friends have changed and friendship isn’t enough.
While Kerri knows that Jacob and Kyle play with women occasionally, she also knows that she could never live with being only a temporary fling to them. When Kerri makes the decision to leave because watching them from the outside is becoming too painful, she gets a surprise second chance at love. That is, if three people can work through the obstacles and misunderstandings that come with it…
Trademarks Acknowledgement
The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of the following wordmarks mentioned in this work of fiction:
Skype: Skype Technologies S.A., Microsoft Corporation
Xena: Warrior Princess
: Studio USA Television Distribution, LLC
Kindle: Amazon Inc.
HGTV: Scripps Networks, LLC
Jacuzzi: Jacuzzi Hot Tubs, Inc.
Chapter One
“Did you tell them why you’re leaving, Kerri?” Rebecca, my best friend since eighth grade, looked at me with concern. Then she looked pointedly at the plane ticket I held clutched painfully in my hands. “You figured out how you felt about them and what? You bought a plane ticket to leave three days later and didn’t even tell them until the night before?” She actually grasped the sides of her computer worriedly, I guessed since she couldn’t actually grab me. “This isn’t you, Kerri. Since when do you run? Why don’t you be honest with them? Don’t they deserve that much?”
“You want me to tell two of my closest friends, who are totally in love with each other, that I am leaving because I can’t take being in the same house with them anymore?” I glared at my computer screen. Sometimes there were drawbacks to Skype—like my best friend, who was over eight hundred miles away, could still read my face so well I couldn’t get away with shit. “No, I didn’t tell them. They would be upset and I can’t take it anymore. It was different when I was just attracted to them. Or when I was at least lying to myself about that being all there was.”
I sighed to myself. Jacob and Kyle had looked so worried about me, and they’d tried so hard to convince me to stay. “I just told them that Caleb has been gone for over two years now, and I need to find a life of my own. It’s the truth, Becs. I still miss him every day, but I want to find someone to love me again. I’m tired of sleeping alone. I am tired of being alone.”
“Kerri, you already have found someone to love and you know it!” Rebecca threw her hands in the air. With her short red hair, green eyes and petite build, she looked like a fuming leprechaun. “You are in love with Jacob and Kyle. What if they could feel the same way about you? You told me they used to have relationships with women before you moved in with them. So you know they enjoy being with women.”
“Yes, but it was only for a night or a few weeks at most… They have never hinted that they wanted anything long term.” I looked at Rebecca, fighting back tears. “I couldn’t be with them for only a week or two and then go back to being friends. And I can’t lose them. They are too much a part of me. They miss Caleb as much as I do.” And with that thought I realized why I was so afraid of reaching for what I wanted so badly.
My late husband had grown up with Jacob and Kyle. All three had lived in the same small Oklahoma farming town outside of Guthrie. They were all only children, and had grown up together as close and loving as any brothers could possibly be.
I confessed my real fear to her. “What if I tell them and I lose them? It’s not just them not loving me back, if I lose their friendship, I lose my last link to Caleb too.”
“Kerri, you love them, you need to try.” Rebecca looked at me earnestly. “If you don’t tell them, and you move away, they will be gone anyway. You will pull away from them because it hurts too much. If you tell them, you may still lose them, but it will at least be because of the truth. You won’t have to wonder ‘what if’ for the rest of your life,” she continued gently. “But no matter what happens, you will
never
lose your connection to Caleb.”
God, she was right. About Caleb. I knew that, but sometimes it made it so much easier to feel him when there was somebody who shared memories of him. Who loved him too. Kyle and Jacob could even share memories of him that I hadn’t heard. Sometimes, when they were telling stories, I swear I could hear Caleb’s booming laughter right along with ours.
And I was already pulling away from them. Staying in my room more and more because the sight of them curled up together while we watched TV made me feel so lonely. My eyes would spend more time on them than on the TV while I wished I was snuggled up with them. All the times that I saw them kiss made me ache so much that I hid more and more.
Rebecca smiled gently. “Kerri, I thought you were making a mistake when you, a California city girl, moved to their ranch, even if it is just outside Oklahoma City. I didn’t like the idea of you taking over as their cook and housekeeper after working your way up in a good restaurant. I hated to see you walk away from that and I was sure you’d regret that. I thought when the shock and grief of Caleb’s car accident was over, once you had time to process everything, you would move out to Orlando with me if you still wanted a fresh start. But I have watched you over our Skype calls. You are happy there, Kerri.” Her eyes turned fierce. “And when I have visited, each time I could see that your feelings for them had changed a little bit more. Don’t you dare walk away from them without taking the chance first!”
Wrapping my arms around my stomach, I took a deep, shuddering breath. Could I do this? Take the leap and risk the crash? Rebecca was right, I was already plummeting. Just because I was falling with a parachute didn’t mean I wasn’t still going to hit bottom. It was just slower. “Are you ready for me to show up on your doorstep, Becs? Because if they tell me no, I am going to show up as a blubbering mess.”
“Always ready, Kerri.” She smiled at me. “But I don’t think that is as likely as you think. Go talk to them now.”
A few minutes later I was looking at myself in the mirror, trying to believe there was a chance. I knew that they thought I was pretty with my dark brown eyes and long, wavy brown hair. I had decent figure even though I wasn’t stick thin, and I had hips. At a little over five and a half feet I was never going to be anything other than short and curvy. That took some effort to maintain so I didn’t cross over into chunky. And avoidance of cheesecake.
I had never been the femme fatale type. That was a laugh. I’d met Caleb when I’d stood up at a home football game for our college team. I had gone off on a rant at the ref about what I’d considered to be an incorrect pass interference call. By the time I had caught my breath, there had been three men staring at me, and I had self-consciously apologized. They had all smiled and shaken their heads at me. Caleb had promptly asked me to dinner and introduced me to his best friends Kyle and Jacob. The four of us had been inseparable for the next four years.
So no, feminine and seductive were not my natural state. The thought of trying to present myself to two men—two ridiculously, sexy, attractive men? If I was wearing my boots, I would be shaking in them.
As I looked down, I sighed to myself over my clothes—cut-off shorts and a worn teal tank top weren’t exactly sexy either. Not that seduction wear was called for, but a casual sundress would’ve been nice. It wasn’t like I had that option though. I had packed everything except the clothes I was going to wear to leave in tomorrow. And as I thought about it, I realized that all my clothes were pretty much the same as what I had on. I had donated most of my clothing when I’d come out here, wanting a completely fresh start. It was a bit of a shock to understand I’d only replaced them with casual and sturdy items. Jeans and T-shirts were basically all I had.
I didn’t look like any of the women they had hooked up with. Oh, God, was I going to be making a fool of myself? I had visions of Jacob, a gruff, giant of a man, looking at me with embarrassed, gentle eyes. I knew he would be horrified at the idea of hurting me. He was the one I was most afraid of rejecting me. I knew Kyle thought I was hot. I had caught him looking at me enough times with heat in his eyes. But he would never risk losing Jacob, and I would never want to come between them. And honestly, I wanted them both, or not at all.
I took a deep breath to gather my courage and walked over and opened the door. When I found him on the other side with his hand raised to knock on the door, I don’t know who was more surprised, me or Jacob.
His dark blue eyes widened as he hastily pulled his hand up to run through his curly black hair. I knew that gesture. He only did that when he was extremely self-conscious or emotional. It made me want to reach out to hold him. To give him a hug.
“Kyle and I would like to talk to you… Please?” Jacob asked quietly.
“About my leaving?”
“Yes.”
He looked like he wanted to say more but was afraid to. And that settled any doubts in my mind about whether telling them was the right thing or not. Forget my fears. They were my friends no matter what else. They had been there for me during the worst time of my life. They deserved my honesty about everything, didn’t they?