Authors: Elizabeth Kelly
“Hello Shawn.”
“Hello Lily. How are you doing?”
“I buried my husband two days ago. How do
you think I’m doing?”
The small, portly man winced before
approaching her. He stared out the window at the rain. “I’m sorry, Lily. I
know Barry’s will must have come as a shock to you.”
“Not really.” She shrugged. “Barry was an
asshole to me when he was alive. I’m not surprised he’s an asshole in death,
as well. I guess as his lawyer you didn’t really see that side of him, did
you?”
The man winced again, his face turning a
bright red, and Lily almost felt sorry for him.
“Well um,” he cleared his throat nervously,
“as Barry’s will indicated, he’s left everything to his parents. That includes
all of his investments, the funds in his personal account, and this house along
with all of its contents.”
“Yes, I remember.” She said softly.
“Given your delicate condition, Mr. and
Mrs. Castro are willing to let you stay in the house until after the baby is
born.”
“That’s generous of them.”
“They – they’ve asked me to speak with you
about well, about – “
“Just spit it out, Shawn.” Lily said
wearily.
“They want the baby. They’re willing to
offer you a hundred thousand dollars if you give up all rights to the baby and
allow them to adopt it.”
For the first time since he joined her in
the room, Lily’s gaze fell on him. “They want to buy my baby.”
“They want to give it a good life. Barry’s
parents are financially secure and they’ll be able to give their grandchild the
life it deserves.”
“They don’t believe I can do that?” Lily
asked softly.
Shawn sighed. “Lily, you have no job, no
family and no money.”
“Thanks to their son.” She said bitterly.
“If I were you, I’d consider their offer.”
Shawn said hesitantly. “No one is going to hire you with the minimal work
experience you have. Babies are expensive. How will you provide for it?
You’re still young. With this money you can start over, you can have another –
“
“Don’t you dare say it, Shawn.” Lily
snapped. “Don’t you dare say I can have another child.”
The man flushed again. “I’m sorry, Lily.”
She stared impassively at him before
returning her gaze to the window. “I should never have told them about the
baby.” She muttered almost to herself.
“You don’t have to make your decision right
away. Mr. and Mrs. Castro understand this is a hard decision and they’re
willing to give you a few months to think it over. You can stay in the house,
and they’re also offering to give you a small portion of Barry’s money to keep
you afloat while you consider their offer.”
“How kind of them.” Lily said quietly.
“Just – just consider it, alright?” Shawn
patted her hand almost timidly. “You have very few options.”
“Go away, Shawn.” Lily said wearily as she
turned and, gripping the walker firmly in her hands, shuffled carefully towards
the doorway. “I’m tired and I need to rest. I trust you can show yourself
out.”
* * *
Three months later
“Excuse me?”
Rob glanced up from the front seat of the
fire truck. A woman, small and dressed in a thick winter jacket, was standing
nervously in front of the truck. She had a pink knitted cap on her head and
she was holding what looked to be a tray of chocolate chip cookies in her
mitten-covered hands.
“Can I help you?” He jumped down and wiped
his hands on the seat of his pants. He cocked his head. The woman looked
vaguely familiar to him and he studied her carefully as her cheeks, already red
from the cold, flushed even brighter.
“My name is Lily. Lily Castro? A few
months ago I was in a car accident and you were one of…”
She trailed off, swallowing nervously and
Rob gave her a broad grin.
“Right! I remember you. How are you, Ms.
Castro? How’s your leg?”
“Uh, it’s okay. I still limp but I stopped
using the cane over a month ago.”
“Good, I’m glad to hear it.”
She gave him another nervous smile.
“Anyway, it occurred to me last week that I had never said thank you for saving
my life. I feel terrible about that so I thought I would come by and say, you
know, thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” Rob smiled again at her
before his eyes dropped to the tray in her hands.
“Oh, I uh, I made you guys cookies. To,
you know, say thank you.” She flushed. “It seemed like a good idea at the
time but now I’m realizing how lame it is. Hey, you saved my life – here, have
a cookie.”
Rob burst out laughing before reaching out
and taking the tray of cookies from her. “Thank you, Ms. Castro. It’s
actually a great idea. We love cookies.”
She blushed and licked her lips nervously.
“There was another man. I think his name was Logan? He stayed with me when I
was trapped in the car. Is he, uh, working today?”
Rob nodded. “He is. I think he’s in the
kitchen. Come on back with me.”
* * *
“You’re shitting me!” Andy’s mouth dropped
open and he stared in disbelief at Logan.
“I’m not.”
“She just fucking crawled into your bed in
the middle of the night?”
“Yes. Naked as a jaybird.” Logan sighed.
“Jesus Christ.” Andy ran a hand through
his short blonde hair. “What the fuck, man? Why does that shit never happen
to me?”
Logan scratched at his beard. “I didn’t
want her crawling into my bed naked, Andy. She’s supposed to be a nanny for
Hazel, not a bed warmer for me.”
“Yeah but man, when a woman crawls naked
into your bed, you gotta take advantage of that.”
“No, I don’t.” Logan said shortly. “My
priority is Hazel, not getting laid.”
Andy rolled his eyes. “Being a single dad
doesn’t mean that you can never have sex again, dude.”
Logan snorted. “Thanks for the tip.”
“So, what did you do?”
“What do you mean, what did I do? I kicked
her out of my bed and told her that her services as a nanny were no longer
required.”
“Who’s with Hazel?” Andy asked.
“Betty’s looking after her again for me.
The poor woman just wants to retire and spend time with her grandchildren, and
I keep dragging her back into my life and my problems.”
He scratched again at his beard. “Now I’ve
got to put an ad in the paper again, and try and find someone else who isn’t a
goddamn sex maniac to look after my kid.”
Andy laughed. “I wouldn’t mind having a
sex maniac living in my house. In fact it’s been months since I’ve fucked – “
“Hey, we got company. Watch your mouth,
Andy.” Rob said sternly.
Logan and Andy swung around to see Rob
standing behind them, a tray of cookies in his hands, and a slender woman in a
pink knitted cap standing beside him.
“Hello.” She smiled at them nervously and
Andy gave her a look of delight.
“Why, hello there.”
“Knock it off, Andy.” Logan shook his head
and stepped toward the woman.
“Hi.” He held his hand out and the woman
hesitated before stripping off her mittens and allowing her tiny hand to be
swallowed by his large one.
“Hi, my name is – “
“Lily. Like the flower.” He smiled at
her.
“You remember me.” She said softly.
“I do. How are you feeling?”
“Good. Kept my leg so, you know, that’s
pretty good. They thought they might have to amputate it.”
He stared down at her left leg as she
cleared her throat. “I came to say thank you for saving my life, Mr…?”
“Anderson. Logan Anderson.”
“I’m sorry it took me so long to come by.
It’s been um, a bit of a difficult time.”
“That’s alright. I understand.”
She glanced at the cookies in Rob’s hands.
“I made chocolate chip cookies. To say thanks.”
“That’s kind of you. We love cookies
around here.” Logan smiled at her as Rob unwrapped the cookies and bit into
one before handing the tray to Andy.
“God, these are delicious.” He said.
“Seriously, Ms. Castro. It could be the best cookie I’ve ever eaten.”
Logan watched with amusement as the small
woman blushed again. “I like to bake.”
She turned back to Logan and after a moment
Rob nudged Andy. It was obvious the woman wanted to speak with Logan alone,
and Rob grabbed another cookie before tipping his head at the doorway of the
kitchen.
“Let’s go.”
Andy nodded agreeably and the two men left
as Lily gave Logan a small smile. “Thank you so much, Mr. Anderson. I – it
meant a lot to me that you stayed with me while I was trapped in the car.”
“You’re welcome, Lily.” His voice was as
deep and raspy as she remembered and she gazed at his dark beard for a moment
before her eyes dropped to his body.
He was wearing loose track pants and a dark
blue t-shirt that clung to his upper body. He was obviously in incredible
shape, his job would demand it, and her eyes lingered on his biceps before she
stared at the broad line of his shoulders.
She flushed when she realized he was
watching her stare at him and she took a step backwards. “Anyway, I just
really wanted to say thank you again and to let you know that I was um, doing
okay.”
“I’m really glad. Thank you for dropping
by, Lily.” He smiled again at her.
“Right. Okay, well I’ll um, see you
around.” She said weakly.
“You bet. Take care of yourself.” He
watched as she turned away and limped toward the door.
She hesitated and turned back. “Mr.
Anderson?”
“Yes?”
“I overheard your conversation with your
friend and I was wondering if I could maybe um, apply for the nanny position?”
He blinked in surprise. “Oh, uh – do you
have experience with children?”
“I babysat a lot when I was younger and I’m
very good with children.” She said eagerly as she walked back to him. “You
have a daughter, is that right?”
“Yes, Hazel. She’s four.”
She smiled. “That’s a good age.”
“It is.” He glanced at his watch. “I’m
sorry. I actually have to leave soon.”
“Oh, of course. I’m so sorry.” She gave
him a hopeful look. “Could I – that is – would you mind if I applied for the
position?”
He studied her for a moment as she twisted
her mittens nervously in her hands, before shaking his head. “I don’t mind.
I’ll give you my address. Why don’t you drop by this weekend? We can do the
interview and you can meet Hazel.”
“Great!” She said eagerly. “I would love
to meet her.”
He wrote his address down on a slip of
paper. She took it and then held out her hand. “Thank you again. I’ll see
you on Saturday then?”
He nodded and shook her hand firmly.
“Yes. Say around eleven?”
“Absolutely. Thank you again, Mr.
Anderson.”
“Hazel? There’s a nice lady coming today
to meet you. She might be your new nanny. Would you like that?” Logan asked
as he carefully combed the tangles from Hazel’s fine, blonde hair.
The little girl didn’t reply and Logan
sighed softly. It had been nearly six months since her mother died and the
little girl hadn’t spoken a word since. He missed her sweet voice.
He made himself smile at the little girl as
he leaned around her to look at her. “Do you want pancakes for breakfast, baby
bug?”
Hazel, her eyes as dark as his, stared
silently at him before giving a brief nod.
“Alright. I’ll even put chocolate chips in
one of them. What do you think about that?” He tickled her lightly and the
little girl squirmed off of the bed and left the room without looking at him.
He sighed again and stared out the window
at the snow that was falling steadily down. He took Hazel to a therapist twice
a week, had been for the last six months, but the woman hadn’t made any
progress with her. Physically there was nothing wrong with her but
emotionally….
He rubbed at the beard on his face before
leaving his bedroom. Hazel just needed more time, he told himself grimly. She
would be fine. Obviously what she saw was traumatic and it would just take
time for her to recover. At least that’s what the therapist kept telling him.
He just needed to be more patient and not push her to talk before she was
ready.
* * *
Lily took a deep breath, straightened her
coat and reached for the doorbell. Before she could ring it, the door opened
and a little girl stared up at her. She had long blonde hair and dark brown
eyes and she was holding a dirty and stained fabric doll. The doll had a
ripped pink dress on, only one button eye and most of the yarn that made up her
hair was missing. The few strands that were left flapped limply against the
doll’s head.
Lily crouched down on the cold step and
smiled at the little girl. “Hello. You must be Hazel. My name is Lily.” She
held her hand out but the little girl just clutched her doll more tightly
against her bright orange t-shirt and stared silently at her.
“I like your doll.” Lily said
encouragingly. “What’s her name?”
Hazel just stared at her and Lily swallowed
nervously. “Is your daddy home, honey?”
“Hazel? Why are you – “
Logan came striding into the hallway and
stopped in surprise when he saw Lily crouched in the doorway.
“Hi! You’re early.” He glanced at his
watch.
Lily flushed as she stood up. “Yes, I’m
sorry. I can um, I can wait outside until eleven.”
“Don’t be silly. Come in.” He picked up
Hazel, kissing her affectionately on the cheek and motioned for Lily to follow
him down the hallway.
She slipped her boots off, placing her
mittens and hat neatly on top of them, but left her coat on as she followed him
down the narrow hallway to the first doorway on the right. It opened up into
the living room and she studied it carefully as Logan tossed Hazel into the air
before kissing her cheek again and setting her gently on the ground.
The little girl didn’t smile or giggle at
her father. Instead, still clutching her doll, she moved to the far side of
the room where a child-sized, brightly-coloured table with matching chairs was
set up. Without looking at either of them, she sat down and, picking up a
crayon, lifted a colouring book from the stack that was sitting on the floor
and began to colour.
Logan moved a large pile of laundry from
one end of the couch, transferring it to the wingback chair that was beside
it. The chair was already filled with laundry and she eyed it carefully,
wondering if the pile of clothes would simply tip over and bury her when she
sat on the couch.
Logan cleared his throat. “Sorry, the
place is a bit messy. It’s been a couple of weeks since the last nanny and uh,
I’m not the greatest housekeeper.”
Lily glanced around the room. The room was
cluttered and messy but not really dirty, she decided. Children’s books lined
the short bookshelf on the wall next to the fireplace and toys were scattered
across the floor. Pictures, coloured with the shaky hand of a child, were
tacked to a bulletin board and there was a plate of half-eaten pancakes perched
precariously on the crowded mantel of the fireplace.
“It looks cozy.” She smiled at him as she
carefully picked her way across the toy-strewn floor to the spot on the couch.
“Yeah, that’s one way to describe it.” He
said cheerfully. “Here, let me take your jacket.”
She hesitated. “Oh um, okay. Thank you.”
Logan watched as she shrugged out of the
jacket. He frowned a little. The woman’s hair and make-up were impeccable,
and if her jacket and designer pants didn’t cost as much as his couch he’d have
been surprised. However, she was wearing a shirt that was obviously miles too
big for her. She practically floated in it and as she handed him her jacket and
sat down, nervously pulling the shirt away from her body, he cleared his
throat.
“Can I get you something to drink? A cup
of coffee or glass of water?” He draped her jacket across the pile of laundry
on the chair.
“No, thank you.”
She perched nervously on the edge of the
couch, picking at the edge of her too-big blouse as Logan looked around for a
chair. The rest of the furniture was covered in various items and he shrugged
before grabbing one of the small chairs from Hazel’s table.
Lily suppressed a smile as he sat his large
body carefully in the chair. She wondered if the chair would hold his weight.
He wasn’t fat by any means, but he was the largest man she’d ever seen and she
bit her lip as the chair creaked alarmingly under him.
“So, let’s get started, okay?”
“Sure.” She agreed.
He glanced at her empty hands. “Do you
have a resume or references?”
She paled. “I um, no I don’t. I didn’t
think to bring one. I haven’t had a job in a while.”
He nodded. “Alright. Well, why don’t you
tell me a bit about yourself?”
“Okay. My name is Lily Castro. I’m 25
years old and I’m a widow, as you know.” She gave him a faint smile. He
glanced at her bare left hand and she wondered if he found it strange that she
wasn’t wearing her wedding ring.
“I grew up in Jasper and uh, moved here to
Wellings when I was fifteen. My dad had gotten a job at the mill here.”
“That’s a big change.” He commented. “A
big city to a small town must have been quite the adjustment.”
“It was.” She agreed. “My parents died
when I was eighteen.”
“I’m sorry.” He murmured.
“Thank you. I uh, I married my husband
shortly after that and I’ve spent the last few years being a homemaker.”
She flushed brightly. It sounded
incredibly lame, even to her. “I babysat a lot for neighbourhood families when
I was a teenager, so I do have quite a bit of experience with babies and
toddlers.” She said a bit desperately. “I could um, I could probably get the
names of some of the families and their numbers if you’d like to talk to them.”
He nodded. “Sure. That would be great.
So, why do you want to be a nanny?”
“I love children.” She said eagerly as she
glanced at Hazel. “And I, well I need to find a job rather quickly as well as
a place to live, so I figured this position would be a good fit for me.”
She paused and coloured again. “I – I’m
assuming this is a live-in position?”
“Yes. I work three days on and four days
off at the station. The three days I’m working, I’m living at the station so
you’d be responsible for Hazel the entire time. During my four days off, I’ll
take care of Hazel and you’ll be free to come and go as you please. If you
want to stay somewhere else during those four days, you’re more than welcome
to.”
“Oh, um…is staying somewhere else a
requirement?” She said quickly.
He shook his head. “No. You’re welcome to
stay at the house. I just wanted to make it clear that you didn’t have to, and
that you wouldn’t be responsible for Hazel when I’m at home.”
“So, really it’s just three days a week,
then?” She asked.
“Technically, yes. Sometimes I do get
called in to the station on my days off. If that happens and you’re around,
I’ll ask you to look after Hazel.”
“That wouldn’t be a problem.” She replied
eagerly. “I won’t mind at all.”
“The pay is twelve hundred a month. You
won’t have to pay rent obviously, and all food costs are included as well.”
She blinked a little. Twelve hundred
seemed generous for a three day work week and her surprise must have shown on
her face because Logan nodded.
“I know it seems like a lot for a part time
position but please remember that you’re responsible for Hazel for the entire
three days. Not that I can’t be reached or come home in an emergency, I can,
but it does end up being a fairly large chunk of your time. As well, I’m
asking you to do some light housekeeping and grocery shopping, and provide
Hazel with nutritious meals and snacks. Can you cook?”
She nodded. “Yes and I’m fine with
housekeeping and grocery shopping.”
“Good. I’m looking for someone to start
right away. What’s your availability?”
“I can start immediately.” She said
quickly. “Whenever you need me to start.”
“Alright.” He hesitated and then glanced
at Hazel. The little girl was completely ignoring them and he smiled fondly at
her before turning back to Lily.
“Let’s talk about Hazel. I’m sure you’ve
noticed that she doesn’t talk very much.”
She nodded and watched curiously as his
face darkened. “Actually, Hazel doesn’t speak at all. Her mother died six
months ago, Hazel was there when it happened, and she hasn’t spoken a word
since that day.”
“Oh my gosh.” Lily put her hand to her
mouth and glanced again at Hazel. “That’s terrible. I’m so sorry for the loss
of your wife.”
He nodded and leaned forward, letting his
large hands dangle between his knees. “Other than the not talking, Hazel is a
normal child. She has therapy twice a week and if they fall on the days that
I’m working, I’ll expect you to take her to them. I realize it’ll be a bit
tougher to communicate with her, but it’s not impossible. She’s pretty easy
going.”
“Okay.” Lily answered.
He hesitated. “She does, occasionally,
have nightmares. I um, I usually let her crawl into the bed with me when that
happens so if I’m not there....”
“She can sleep with me if she’s frightened
in the night. That won’t be a problem.” Lily hastily assured him.
His cell phone rang and he grimaced before
pulling it from his pocket. He glanced at it and gave her an apologetic look.
“I’m sorry. I should take this.”
“No problem.” Lily smiled brightly at him
as he stood and left the living room. She waited a moment before crossing to
the small table and kneeling on the floor opposite of Hazel.
“That’s a pretty picture, honey. You’re
really good at colouring.” She said softly.
The little girl glanced at her and then
dropped her gaze back to the picture in front of her.
“Would you mind if I coloured with you?”
The little girl didn’t respond and Lily
carefully selected a colouring book from the stack on the floor and picked out
a crayon from the large tin can sitting on the table. Humming softly to
herself, she began to colour. After a moment she glanced up. Hazel was
staring at her and Lily smiled encouragingly.
“Could you pass me the green crayon please,
Hazel?”
After about thirty seconds the little girl plucked
a green crayon from the tin and handed it to her.
“Thank you.” Lily said as she began to
colour the field. The next time she looked up, Hazel had left her chair and
drifted closer. She held a blue crayon in her hand and she was studying the
picture in front of Lily.
“Maybe you could help me colour the sky?”
Lily said quietly. “This is a pretty big picture and I could use some help.”
Hazel didn’t nod or look at her but after a
few seconds, she began to colour the sky. Lily smiled happily. “That looks
great. Thank you, Hazel.”
She selected a purple crayon and quickly
filled in the small flowers. “What do you think of the purple? I like
purple. Maybe I should put some pink in there as well?” She asked without
looking up.
A small hand, sticky with syrup, crept into
her vision. It was holding a pink crayon and Lily took it with another nod.
“Thank you, honey.”
Logan stood in the doorway of the living
room, his cell phone held loosely in one hand and his mouth slightly ajar.
He’d had three different nannies since Erin died and Hazel hadn’t gone near any
of them. Hell, she had even closed herself off from Betty, the housekeeper she
had known her entire life. He couldn’t believe that Hazel was actually
colouring with the woman.