Read 150 Movies You Should See Before You Die Online

Authors: Steve Miller

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150 Movies You Should See Before You Die (34 page)

RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD: RAVE TO THE GRAVE
Aurora Entertainment/Castel Film Romania, 2005

PRODUCERS
Vladimir Dostal, Tom Fox, and Nikolai Makarov (executive producers), Anatoly Fradis and Steve Scarduzio (producers)

WRITERS
William Butler and Aaron Strongoni

DIRECTOR
Ellroy Elkayem

STARS
John Keefe (
Julian
), Jenny Mollen (
Jenny
), Cory Hardrict (
Cody
), Cain Mihnea Manoliu (
Jeremy
), Claudiu Bleont (
Aldo
), Sorin Cocis (
Gino
), Catalin Paraschiv (
Skeet
), and Peter Coyote (
Uncle Charles
)

Dimwitted college kids unleash a zombie plague after making a designer drug with chemicals used to reanimate dead tissue.

Why It Sucks

The cheapness of the film wafts from it like the smell of urine from a drunk bum passed out in a doorway. It's inconsistent with the zombie lore established in the first two
Return of the Living Dead
movies and, to make matters even worse, very little in the film is funny. There is even less that is scary. The key to the movie is to realize if there's an idiotic and illogical thing to do, one of the characters will do it.

Thumbs Down Rating:

The Crappies

The Worst Writing Award goes to …
William Butler and Aaron Strongoni for a script so lazily written that it gets the name of the zombie-creating drug wrong and is inconsistent with
Return of
the Living Dead 4
, the film it's a direct sequel to.

And the Worst Actress Award goes to …
Jenny Mollen for her role as Jenny. Sigh. So cute. And so, so untalented.

They Really Said It!

Skeet
: Listen, if you can't trust your drug dealer, who can you trust?

Betcha Didn't Know

Executive producer Tom Fox produced the original
Return of the Living Dead
film. He has been involved with the production of all films in the series so far except the third one.

This movie was released twenty years after the first film in the series debuted in movie theaters.

Trivia Quiz

What is the main difference between the zombies in this film and most other installments in the series?

A: The zombies are animated by Trioxin.

B: The zombies create other zombies through their bites.

C: They aren't unstoppable killing machines, but can be brought down with a single gunshot.

D: The zombies are obsessed with eating brains.

Answer: C. They can be killed with one gunshot. In the first three movies, the zombies are virtually indestructible.

SNOWBEAST
Douglas Cramer Productions, 1977

PRODUCERS
Douglas S. Cramer (executive producer) and Wilford Lloyd Baumes (producer)
Writer
Joseph Stefano
DIRECTOR
Herb Wallerstein
Stars
Robert Logan (
Tony Rill
), Syliva Sidney (
Carrie Rill
), Bo Svenson (
Gar
Seberg
), Yvette Mimieux (
Ellen Seberg
), and Clint Walker (
Sheriff Paraday
)

As a small ski resort prepares to celebrate its fiftieth winter carnival, a violent Sasquatch-like creature descends from the mountaintop to snack on the skiers.

Why It Sucks

It's a cross between
Jaws
and a disaster movie that suffers from an excess of padding (and no, I'm not talking about the costume the Sasquatch wears). There are
waaaay
too many montage shots of characters zooming downhill on skis or trudging through the frozen winter forest in search of Bigfoot tracks. We want to scream at the screen, “Just
kill someone
, dammit!”

Thumbs Down Rating:

The Crappies

The Worst Writer Award goes to …
Joseph Stefano for lack of basic writing skills. Dude, if you write a movie about people getting killed by a monster, we have to care about the characters a little.
And the Worst Director Award goes to …
Herb Wallerstein for filling his movie with obvious and dull scenes merely in order to meet the format-dictated made-for-television running time.

They Really Said It!

Tony Rill
: I must have seen her somewhere. Maybe I'll recognize her when I see her face.

Sheriff Paraday
: She doesn't have one.

Betcha Didn't Know

Joseph Stefano wrote the screenplay for Alfred Hitchcock's masterful thriller
Psycho
. Stefano later felt that the success of that film made it difficult for him to find work on any films other than horror and thrillers.

In 2009, sixty-eight-year-old Bo Svenson took the silver medal in the USA Judo National Championships. Svenson took the prize despite three broken ribs received during an accident while filming
ICARUS
two weeks earlier.

Trivia Quiz

Whose allegedly real Bigfoot encounter did Joseph Stafano use as inspiration for his
Snow Beast
script?

A: Film critic and talk show host Michael Medved

B: Author and Bigfoot-tracker Roger Patterson

C: Writer and director Roger Corman

D: Former United States president Jimmy Carter

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The Horse Whisperer by Nicholas Evans
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Wilderness Days by Jennifer L. Holm
Lowcountry Boneyard by Susan M. Boyer


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