When Love Hurts and Ghosts Linger (3 page)

When I came out of the bathroom, to my surprise he was there waiting by the door, he grabbed me and kissed me so passionately that I forgot about his moodiness and weirdness and assumed that I was over-reacting, people have bad days I guess, even now I have them and think 
'fuck off'
 to the world.

The night then went perfect and we had a really good time. Sat in the club though I began to feel nervous, I looked around and the music seemed to fade away in the distance, I thought I had, had too much to drink but I got the feeling that something was there with me that night and that it followed me home when we arrived back at Alec’s. I could feel the shivers going down my spine but like I said, I wasn’t able to see anything.

Throughout the weekend he seemed to blow hot and cold with me, one minute he would be kissing and hugging me and the next he would be distant, then we would have sex and all would be ok and then he would be back to weird. I swear to god it was like being on a merry-go-round, bloody ups and downs all weekend, it was mind exhausting trying to keep up.

On the Sunday we decided to take the dog for a walk, walking along he was quiet, not really saying a word and to be honest I had, had enough of the crap.

“Why are you being all weird?” I blurted out.

“I don’t think this is going anywhere and to be honest it’s over” he told me coldly.

What the fuck? All weekend he had been hot and cold but he had, had sex with me and now he was telling me he wanted to break up? Was I hearing this correct? I didn’t reply I just walked off to our friend’s house, well she was really his friend at first but since I met her we had become quite close.

When I arrived she could see I was really upset, I mean I wasn’t crying or anything but I was a little hurt, it was all over my face, I thought he really loved me.

“Oh my god he’s told you hasn’t he?” she said straight away as she opened the door to me.

“Yeah he has….” I assumed she meant that he wanted to break up.

“I can’t believe he cheated all this time I mean, we wanted to tell you when we found out but he insisted he would stop….” She blabbered on.

“Excuse me? He only told me that he wanted to break up not that he fucking cheated on me….all this time you say? WHAT? FOR SEVEN FUCKING MONTHS?” I shouted at her.

She looked at me with guilt; she had just given away his secret “Uhhh yeah, I’m sorry I thought you knew.”

I ran out of that house so fast not even The Flash could have kept up with me and I ran all the way back to Alec’s. He opened the door and let me in but before he could say anything I threw a punch at his face. 

I then went upstairs to his room, I was full of rage inside, I couldn’t believe he would do this to me, I never even thought about it, all that time he was away from me he had been sleeping with someone else or well quite a few from what I was told. I had completely trusted this man, what a fool I was aye.

I picked up his PlayStation and threw it out of the window, it made an almighty bang as it crashed onto the concrete below in the back garden and Alec came running into the room.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING!” he shouted at me.

“How dare you fucking hurt me like this, if you wanted someone else all you had to do was say not fucking string me along for seven months and then tell me after you slept around that it’s over” I barked back as I threw things at him.

Tears were streaming down my face; I was inconsolable, hurt and broken. This never happened in a bloody fairy tale did it? No! The men were always decent and caring, they loved their princesses, is this what love was about? Pain and torture? 

He came at me to try and give me a hug but instead I completely lost my temper, I punched that two-timing asshole right in the face again and this time I broke the bastard’s nose. He screamed in pain but that was nothing compared to how I was feeling inside. I grabbed my things, ripped up all our photos and left.  

All the way home I couldn’t stop crying and I remember people staring at me as if to say 
‘is she ok’
 or
‘ what’s wrong with her?’
 but I just hid in my seat and I didn’t move until I reached my stop.

I walked home sort of like a zombie, dragging my legs and my bag as if it was all too heavy for me, I had my heart ripped out and had been cheated on by someone I trusted. The whole relationship had been a complete lie, everything he said was nothing.

When I got home my mother was sat there watching TV and she saw the redness on my face and my bloodshot eyes from where I had been crying and she immediately got up to hug me.

“What’s wrong honey?” she asked so benignant.

I burst into tears again “its Alec mum, he dumped me and then I found out he had been cheating on me, mum….I thought he was the one for me I really did, he told me he loved me so I let him have me and it was all a lie.”

My mum looked at me, she knew by those words I was no longer a virgin. I could see the disappointment in her eyes although she said nothing about it and just hugged me.

“Honey, I know it seems like the end of the world and I know you’re upset but he isn’t worth it if he did that to you, one day you’ll find the right one but there is no rush” her voice was so calm and tender.

She kissed me on the forehead and went downstairs, I could hear her telling me my dad, and as dads do when their daughters are hurt, he kicked off threatening to go kill Alec for hurting his little girl. 

Inside I felt a little happy to hear those words, however I’d never wish him dead of course not but I did wish he would have more pain inflicted on him so he could almost feel how I was feeling inside at that time.

As I lied on my bed trying to console myself I could hear a whispering voice, I got up thinking I had knocked the TV on by leaning on the remote but the TV was off, I didn’t really think anything of it and lied back down. 

I again heard the whisper and there was a slight chill in the air. I got up to check the windows but it was closed so I thought that maybe it was my mum and dad downstairs but then the whisper seemed close and my window frosted over as if a cold winter loomed outside. That wasn’t normal surely, it was warm and summer time as it was bank holiday weekend, I felt confused and slightly scared. I backed away from the window as the whisper then became a voice.

“We’re coming for you, we need you” the voice echoed in my room.

I looked around and saw no-one and as I tried to leave my bedroom door was stuck where it had frozen shut, I now felt like I was standing in an ice-cave, it was freezing and the cold air consumed the entire room. 

I could feel my heart pounding and as I looked around several ghostly images or people appeared and seemed to reach out to me with one arm. Without thinking I let out a terrifying scream that caused my dad to run up the stairs and kick my door down.

Shaking and terrified I explained what I saw but as the words came out of my mouth I realised how stupid I sounded. Both my parent’s looked at each-other and then looked at me.

“What? What is it?” I asked them worryingly.

They took a deep breath and my mother turned to me, she looked so scared “It’s happening again.”

When I looked at her face all those memories came flooding back, like flash images of a video playing in my mind, I knew then that this sort of thing had happened before and from that moment in my life the ghosts never ever went away, in-fact they became worse, what my future would lead me to would be one of the most terrifying experiences anyone would ever go through.

I was now seventeen and in that past year that had gone I had seen countless ghosts, been terrified to my very core and had rediscovered my ability. 

My parent’s wanted to have me hypnotised again but I refused, I had blocked all this out before but when that dickhead hurt me and my heart was broken, all of my inner defences shut down, all those walls she had built in my mind fell over and I didn’t want them to go back up.

It wasn’t because I wanted to see these dead people because believe me I didn’t, but I didn’t want to forget about this to then have something bad happen to me to then remember again and have the same experience as before, it would be a never ending cycle.

I would rather know what I can do and be prepared as much as I could, so I carried on seeing them regularly but done my best to avoid talking to or acknowledging them. I had hoped that they would get the message that although I could see them, and they quite clearly knew that, that there was nothing I could do to help and I had hoped that they would eventually go away and leave me the fuck alone, but no, it was never ever going to be that easy, they wanted my help and one day they would get it, I just didn't know that then.

I was at college now and I was studying history and child-care. I wanted to be a teacher or something to do with kids, I loved them and one day I planned to have at least two, being an only child all this time I didn’t want to have just the one as I knew how lonely this could be.

I had, had a few boyfriends and it must have been a bad habit of mine as I tended to pick the assholes, the boy with the bad-boy image. I started to think that all guys were the same, a huge bunch of dicks! I had the abusive one, the cheater, which I already had, had before, the one that was nice then decided to be gay, the manipulator, so yeah, in my head, all men were the same.

I was sat in history and we were learning about world war two, now no offence, I loved history but I had learnt about this shit in school, I had heard it all before, we all know what Hitler done already, it was just a repeat and to be honest I started to feel a bit bored. 

I felt my eyes got heavy as I stared out of the classroom into the corridor outside the door. At that moment I saw a figure float by, I looked around and everyone was looking face forward listening to the teacher drone on about this bloody war, don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t cold and heartless not at all, I did feel for all those men who had fought for our freedom but I wanted to learn about other pieces of history. 

The figure was pacing backwards and forwards and every now and then this grey/blue ghostly figure would pass the classroom door. I had ignored them up until now but I recognised this figure. A memory flashed in my head, I had seen that woman before when I was little, was she following me? I’d had enough and decided I needed to confront this woman or ghost.

I snuck out of the classroom but to be honest not one head turned, was as if they couldn’t hear me moving, they didn't even notice me leave as I went into the corridor. I felt the chill straight away and the coldness ran through my body as if I was on top of a freezing cold mountain with nothing warm to cover me.

The woman looked at me and started floating towards the stairs that led down into the college basement. Of course she had to do that didn’t she, I fucking hated basements, as far back as I could remember I would never ever go down into any basement, even in someone’s house when they had it converted into a nice seating area with kitchen, no, no, no and hell no. 

‘Get a grip’ 
I told myself as I nervously followed her into the college basement. It was dark and cold, filled with unused and broken college equipment. Clearly this is where they hid all their crap so no wonder the campus looked very clean and organised, they had a secret shit pile place. 

I could hear crying or sobbing of some sort, it was quiet and quite clearly the sounds of a woman. I followed the sounds down this dark barely lit corridor where I eventually reached a room. The room was full of drama equipment, manikins, props, costumes, masks, you name it, it was all in there, enough to freak you out.

In the corner the ghostly woman stood facing the wall crying in her wedding dress. I was shivering and scared. Why did I follow her? But before I could run away she turned around and looked straight into my eyes.

“Why did he do this to me?” her ghostly voice sobbed.

I could see the air leaving my body as I breathed quite fast in slight panic “Uhhh I….I don’t know, who are you on about?” why did I even ask?

“My husband….he did this to me” and she held out her wrists which had been slit and blood began to pour from them.

I jumped back and very honestly I was shitting myself. I had never seen them bleed, I didn’t know that they could, I mean they were dead for fuck sake and this one was bleeding out in-front of me.

“Please tell me what you want from me” my voice trembled with fear.

“Help me, we’re all coming for you” she cried back.

Coming for me? What like coming to get me or coming for my help? I didn’t know what she meant but I didn’t dare ask her, I was afraid of the answer. She started to leave but I knew she would be back and I needed to stop this so I thought if I helped her then she would leave me alone.

“WAIT!” I shouted after her “please tell me who you are so I can help you.”

She turned, she was so sad it almost made me cry “I’m Amy….tell me why he did this to me” and with those words she flew towards me.

It frightened me so much I fell backwards straight onto all the crap behind me but when I looked up she had gone. I ran out of that basement and I didn’t look back. As I reached the top of the stairs I pushed the door open so hard it whacked someone straight in the face. As I looked behind the door I had knocked some poor guy over.

“Oh my god I’m so sorry” I extended my arm to help him up.

“Wow you pushed that open with some force didn’t you” he looked at me rubbing his face.

“Yeah I’m sorry I didn’t know you were behind there.”

I had clearly hurt this man, the door had smacked him square in the face and you could see the red mark. 

“Are you ok?” he asked concerned.

“I’m fine why do you ask?” I had hurt him and he was checking if I was ok?

“You look terrified is all….” He noticed my pale and scared expression.