Voice Of The Demon (Book 2) (63 page)

Micah said nothing for a moment, but Robert’s silence was painfully eloquent. Micah swallowed. ‘I can’t go back home, can I? Not after all this. I can’t even go back to Clonnet with Jenn.’

‘If you tried, they’d take all their frustration and hatred of me out on you. If you were very lucky, they might only throw you in prison for the rest of your life. You’d be tortured and eventually executed. For all that you’re Sealed, they’d never believe you didn’t know I was a sorcerer – not after all these years.’

‘But they believed you knew nothing about Finnlay.’

Robert shook his head. ‘No, I convinced them Finnlay was dead and therefore couldn’t be a sorcerer. This is different. You’re too close to me. They’d kill you. I’m sorry.’ With his voice low and uncompromising, he murmured, ‘So what do you want to do next?’

For some reason, Micah’s mouth went suddenly dry. He swallowed.

‘Yes, I’m giving you a choice, my friend,’ Robert added without blinking. ‘What do you want to do?’

Micah stifled a laugh. ‘What I want is for us both to go home to Dunlorn – but since that’s impossible, I’ll go with you.’

An involuntary smile flashed across Robert’s face. ‘But you don’t know where I’m going.’

Micah grinned and turned back to the keep. ‘Oh yes I do.’

‘This is madness, Robert,’ Finnlay blustered, waving his hands above the dining table. ‘How can you think for one minute that Bella and Jenn can just go back to their normal lives after all this? There’ll be an inquisition! They’ll be asked every conceivable question and not one innocent answer will be believed.’

Robert reached for another slice of meat from the plate Bella held out to him. ‘There’s nothing so powerful in this world, Brother, than the picture of innocence.’ Robert glanced down the table at each of them. At Neil, Shane, Keagan, Micah and Aiden McCauly. Finally his eyes lit on Bella. ‘For reasons that have always eluded me, women have always been able to assume a dignified grace far beyond the skills of any man. With the right preparation both Bella and her sister will be able insist over again that they were merely hostages to you and I – even, if they care to do it – to Jacob’s pride. It was no secret he despised the Guilde. Neil can be Sealed – if he’ll consent. You’ll have to go back to the mountains.’ He took a sip of wine. ‘We both know I cannot follow you.’

Finnlay stared at him and, not for the first time, marvelled at his brother’s innate resilience. Despite everything he’d been through – despite having given into something that he’d fought against all his life – he was still sitting there,
analysing their situation and plotting their escape. It was uncanny. ‘And where will you go?’

‘I don’t know yet. I have to do something about that irritating priest—’

‘Show some respect, Robert,’ McCauly interrupted, ‘or I’ll start to think you don’t like me.’

‘—But I could just as easily leave him here to fend for himself,’ Robert continued, deadpan.

Finnlay glanced down the table to see the others hide their smiles. They were happy that at least they had some joke to laugh about. Even though they’d stayed, there was an underlying nervousness of the sorcery they’d become a part of.

But Finnlay had to know what Robert would do. ‘Will you come back to Lusara?’

‘Please, Finn, don’t ask me that question. Every time I say I won’t come back I end up breaking my word.’

‘I know, but this is important – for reasons completely unrelated to anything else.’

‘Oh? What?’

Finnlay did his best to push his chair back and come to his feet; he had to lean most of his weight on the table, however. As formally as he could under the circumstances he said, ‘I would like your permission . . . to marry.’

Robert’s eyebrows shot up. ‘I beg your pardon?’

‘I would like your permission . . .’

‘Yes, I heard that bit,’ Robert got to his feet, a mischievous smile on his face. ‘I just don’t believe it. This is some kind of prank, isn’t it? To cheer me up?’

‘No, of course not . . .’

‘Because I find it almost impossible to believe that somehow you have searched the length and breadth of this country to find the only poor, brainless girl who would be fool enough to accept a complete physical wreck like you.’ Robert was almost laughing at Finnlay’s stuttering discomfort.

‘No, it’s not like that, Robert. . .’

‘No? Then tell me who she is and I’ll happily make her aware of the mistake she’s about to make.’

‘Robert, please,’ Finnlay held a hand up and tried to ignore
the smiles and laughter wafting around the table. He knew his face was red, but he persisted, ‘Don’t you dare say anything to her. It took me a long time to convince her in the first place. I won’t let you ruin it for me.’

‘I know her?’ Robert’s laughter subsided and he watched Finnlay with hooded eyes.

‘Fiona.’

For a moment, there was no reaction. Then a slow smile spread across Robert’s face, lighting even the darkness in his eyes. ‘Of course you have my permission, Brother, and I’m honoured you still wanted to ask. You’d better find a way to get Mother to the wedding. She’d never forgive you if she had to miss it . . . Hell!’

Robert’s eyes widened, but Finnlay didn’t need to ask. ‘Mother! She’ll be a direct target now. We have to warn her. Not only that, but Fiona is there, now, with Hilderic.’

‘I’ll go,’ Shane said into the stunned silence. ‘It would be better, my lord, if you make directly for your destination. I’ll pass on the message and help in whatever way I can.’

‘Thank you, Shane,’ Robert murmured with a nod. ‘And now I would like to drink a toast, to my brother and his future bride. May they have all the happiness together that . . . they deserve.’

*

‘Are you sure about this?’

Jenn leaned over the bed and slipped her arms under the tiny bundle. She turned around and met Bella’s gaze. ‘Yes, I’m sure. He must be Presented to the gods properly or they won’t know who he is. If I leave it any longer, the others will insist I do it their way and it’ll be too late. I must go now while they’re still at supper. Addie?’

‘Yes, my lady?’

‘Take him for a moment. Come with me to the chapel. I’ll need you to keep him outside for a moment, but when I take him from you I want you to come back here. If anyone asks for me, tell them that I was tired and went to bed early.’

As Jenn opened the door to let Addie through, Bella moved and barred her way. ‘How can you just go on with
this after everything that’s happened? What’s happened to you? Don’t you care about . . . about. . .’

With a glance at Addie, Jenn closed the door and turned to face Bella. Carefully, she clasped her hands together and took a deep breath. ‘I’m a sorcerer too, Bella.’

Her sister took a single step back. ‘But how can you be a sorcerer? There’s never been anything in our family . . .’

‘Nor in the Douglas House either, and yet we have both Finn and Robert.’ Jenn had wanted to do this gently, but she didn’t have time right now. ‘I know how you must feel. I was—’

‘How can you possibly know how I feel?’ Bella snapped. ‘Our home has been destroyed, our father killed and all because of sorcerery! You brought this down upon us, Sister. And now Robert is expecting us to just go home and pick up our lives! Is he mad? Are you?’

‘Bella, please,’ Jenn moved forward and took Bella’s hand. She held on hard and forced Bella to meet her gaze. ‘It will all work out, believe me. We can go back to our lives – but please give me time to tell you the truth. All of it. I do know how you feel. You’re angry and hurt and afraid. But I promise I’ll answer all your questions. Please, just be patient – if only for your nephew’s sake.’

Bella pulled her hand away. ‘That’s cruel, using your own son to make me behave! You should be ashamed. Very well, I will wait – but I won’t promise to change my mind. And yes, I will do it for your son, but not because you make me. Because he needs someone in his life who will not lie whenever it suits, nor use people to get whatever they want!’ With that, Bella pushed her way past Jenn, pulled the door open and disappeared down the corridor.

Swallowing her pain, Jenn joined Addie and turned her mind to the task at hand. Bella would know the truth in time – and she would understand. But even so, it was no easy thing to hear her own sister accuse her of using people.

With everyone in the hall lingering over their meal, the castle was eerily empty. There were no lights glowing under doors, no fires to warm against the early summer night. Silently and gingerly, Jenn led Addie along the corridor to a
set of narrow stairs. Only one flight up and they could take another passage bypassing the hall – the only way she could get to the chapel without being seen. The door loomed ahead, open and dark inside. Jenn paused, keeping her emotions and her senses tightly controlled.

She glanced back at Addie, then slipped inside, closing the door behind her. She could have brought candles to life, but she didn’t. Instead, she moved slowly forward in the filmy moonlight which fell like a ghost into the chapel. She stopped when she was still a few feet from the bier.

Jacob had been laid out properly, just as McCauly had ordered. His cold body lay still and lifeless, draped by a banner proudly displaying his coat of arms. The House of Ross.

‘You didn’t see,’ Jenn began unsteadily, her voice and hands shaking together, ‘you didn’t see how well and bravely your men fought. You didn’t see the loyalty of Neil and Shane, of Keagan and Addie. You would have been so proud of them. So proud, too, of the way Bella worked to calm the rest before they fled. She’s taken care of us all since then, as she always took care of you and I.’

Jenn swallowed and took a step forward. She reached out and touched a finger to the banner. ‘But I was proud of you, too. The way you defied the Guilde, the way your voice rang out. The way you accepted my work with the healers. The way you accepted you’d been wrong about Robert.’

She tried to go on, but her throat was tight, making it difficult to breathe. She swallowed again, determined to finish what she’d started. ‘I was so proud, too, to be your daughter. I’m sorry I lied to you. I’m sorry I didn’t just tell you the truth. I didn’t mean to be a disappointment to you. I wanted so much for you to be proud of me. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I didn’t mean to hurt Bella. I know that doesn’t make it right—

Jenn paused, trying to get her thoughts straight. She would only ever have this one chance to say what she wanted. ‘I just wish you could have waited until you saw your grandson. I know you would have loved him. I know you would have forgiven him his mother’s sins. I just wish you could have
seen him, just once – to know that the House of Ross will survive in him.’

No more words would come. Her heart was lead in her chest, her eyes suddenly blind with tears. She lifted her hands to her face, covered it against the pain.

And then there were arms around her, holding her tight. She didn’t look up. She knew that touch. Robert didn’t say anything. He just held her as she cried, silent against her anguish. His grip didn’t loosen until her sobs gradually subsided and she lifted her face to look at him.

There was about him the appearance of a man who knew he was committing a crime. His deep green eyes gazed at her steadily and she realized that a single word from her could banish him from her life for ever.

But she didn’t want him gone. Not for one day, one hour, one minute. She wanted him to stay with her, exactly like this.

She reached up a hand and gently touched the side of his face. He didn’t move. She rose on her toes and brought his face down towards her. Hardly daring to breathe, she brushed her lips against his and felt him tremble. Then she kissed him again, long and deep, and his arms held her so tight she thought she would break.

She gazed into his eyes again, her tears gone. In the softest whisper she said, ‘I just wanted you to know.’

‘I can’t ask you to come with me. You know that.’

‘Yes – and you know I’d refuse.’

‘Yes.’

He stared at her a moment longer, then gently released her, taking a step back.

‘I didn’t know you were in here,’ she murmured.

‘I gathered as much. I’m sorry I intruded. I came in here to do some thinking, away from prying eyes. Sometimes I get the feeling everyone is watching me.’ Robert waved a hand at the altar candles and they glowed yellow and soft. ‘I know why, of course, but sometimes . . .’

‘Will you be all right?’

‘Me?’ His eyes fixed on her like two glowing beacons. ‘Why should I not be?’

For a moment, Jenn couldn’t work out why this question should worry her. But then she looked deeper and stopped in surprise. The well of darkness inside him, eating away at him: she couldn’t see it any more! ‘It’s gone, hasn’t it? The demon?’

‘No. Just extinguished for a while.’

‘It’s no longer killing you.’

Robert looked vulnerable for a moment. For so long people had thought him immune to the many conflicts which faced him. None would have been able to guess the real damage they’d done, nor the consequences of his assumed invulnerability. Only now and then would the truth show, in a look, a glance, a self-deriding comment. The demon had been growing for twenty years, feeding off every evil Robert had ever encountered. For the moment, it was spent. How long would that last?

‘What do you plan to do now that the world will know you’re a sorcerer?’

Robert wandered up to the altar, touched the cloth beneath the candlesticks. ‘I don’t know. Believe it or not, I came in here to discuss that with your father.’

Jenn glanced once more at the shrouded figure before her. Strange that Robert should have come here, to see Jacob, a man who had for so many years believed him a traitor to his own people. She turned back to Robert to find he was studying the solitary stained-glass window above his head. ‘What are you feeling?’

For a moment he didn’t move. Then his head tilted to gaze at the moon through the window. ‘For twenty years I’ve been running from a buried urge to use the Word of Destruction, believing I was strong enough to resist. But in the end, the demon won and although this keep and everyone inside survived, my failure still stands before me, a promise of the future.’