Fianna Kelly Versus the Jeebees: A Collection of Steampunk Stories

Fianna
Kelly
Versus the Jeebees

 

A
collection of
steampunk stories

 

 

By
Harry Dodgson

 

This is a work of fiction. Names,
characters, places, events and incidents are either the products of the
author's imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual
persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
The views and opinions expressed in this book by the characters are solely
their own and do not necessarily reflect the views or opinions of the author or
any actual person, living or dead. The author does not make any representation
of the accuracy of any such views and opinions. Neither children nor adults
should attempt to duplicate any feat performed by the characters in this book.
R
emember these rules when handling firearms
:
1. Always keep the gun pointed in a safe direction.
2. Always keep your finger off the trigger until
ready to shoot.
3. Always keep the gun unloaded until ready to use.

 

Story
and characters Copyright © 2015 by Harry Dodgson
Cover Illustration Copyright © 2015 by Matt Pearson
Cover design by Harry Dodgson and Matt Pearson
Book design and production by Harry Dodgson
Editing by Harry Dodgson
Advance proofreads by Charlie Lowther and Matt Pearson
Initial research into period firearms by Rob Reed
Author photograph by Christa Larson-Bazzi

All
Rights Reserved

 

 

 

 

Table of Contents

          
Background

          
ONE

          
• June 6

          
• June 7

          
• June 8

          
• June 9

          
• June 10

          
• June 11

          
TWO

          
• September 1

          
• September 2

          
THREE

          
• April 27

          
• April 28

          
• April 29

          
• April 30

          
• May 1

          
• May 2

          
• May 3

          
• May 4

          

May 5

          
• May 11

          
• May 12

          
FOUR

          
• July 19

          
• July 20

          
• July 21

          
• July 22

          
• July 23

          
FIVE

          
• February 10

          
• February 11

          

February 12

          
• February 13

          
• February 14

          

February 15

          
• February 16

          

February 17

          

Epilogue

          
About the Author

          
Quotes

Background

 

 

These
stories are set during the early 1880's. The location is Ireland and the
neighbouring countries. I have rejected the poverty, hunger, and disease of
that period to create a more pleasant tale.

This
was the time when steam engines were the dominant power sources.
Lighter-than-air vehicles and locomotives were the fashionable way to travel
and had regular scheduled routes. For example, the Dublin to London airship
went East on even days and West on odd ones with no ships flying on Sundays.
Bicycles and horse-drawn carriages were popular for short trips. The automobile
and internal combustion engine were playthings and deemed as impractical.

Inventors
were discovering the laws of science and creating new devices daily to improve
the lives of their fellow man. Electricity was still new and anything was
considered possible given enough of it.

The
countries of Europe and their boundaries were stable with the combat exported
to Africa and Asia. The United States was a fledgling country and insignificant
at this time.

Women
were beginning to see the life they could have outside of the home. This brings
us to the heroine of our tale; an Irish woman in her twenties on a journey to
prove her worth for the world to see.

ONE

 

The way to adventure.

 


June 6

 

 

This
was my first adventure. Like most affairs, it wasn't planned as one. On the
contrary, I planned to have an uneventful few days in transit culminating with
a friendly shooting competition. It was a wonderful spring day; plenty of
sunshine, several fluffy clouds, and a gentle breeze.

My
father and I were walking down the streets of Dublin to the docks. This city
was not our home, just a waypoint on my journey to London. I was wearing a
shoe-length dress under my corset. My mother wanted me to dress like a
respectable young English woman. I managed to avoid a bustle but my hair was
put up and hidden inside my summer bonnet. She said that men had unfair
prejudices based on how a woman dressed, but I much preferred my shorter
pleated skirts and letting my hair down to blow in the wind.

This
wasn't my first time in a big city. That did not mean I couldn't act like it
was. I stopped whenever I saw something of interest. Some times it was a
trinket in a shoppe window. Other times it was someone who stood out in the
crowd. Many times it was just to slow our progress.

I
spun around in front of my father so we were face to face. Actually it was more
face to chest as my father was taller than me by more than a head. I am a
little over five feet tall and less than three feet around which is not bad for
a grown woman.

I
said, "Why must I go by boat and carriage? My friends will be going by
airship the day after tomorrow and will still arrive before me."

"Which
of your many friends would those be?"

"Those
would be Darina, Melissa, Sheela, and Bevin."

"They
are nice young women whose parents are too lenient in my opinion."

"Their
parents may think the same of you for allowing me to travel without an
escort."

My
parents were wonderful. My father was a well-built man who had worked out in
the fields all his life. My mother did her work in the house and flower garden.
Together, they raised four children. My father loved us and would do almost
anything for us; except allow us to ride in airships. He carried my
portmanteau, but I would not allow him to carry my rifle. I had that in its
case on a sling over my shoulder. My mother had tried to keep it from ruining
the look she wanted for her eldest daughter travelling abroad; and failed.

He
said, "We have had this discussion before and my reasons have not changed.
You will arrive in plenty of time for the tournament. I even thought of a new
reason just now. With the money you are saving you can visit the shoppes of
London and buy some of those pretty bracelets that you are so fond of looking
at."

"That
is not a good reason! When I win I will have plenty to spend on myself as well
as my adoring parents, brothers, and sister."

"Just
because you are the best here, does not mean you will be the best in it. You
may not become wealthy and respected this weekend. However, it is possible you
will come home with bracelets from your wrists to your elbows."

I
stood on my toes and gave him a kiss on his cheek. He reluctantly handed my
suitcase to me and I boarded the waiting boat. If he wanted me to travel this
way, I would make the most of it. Sometimes pleasing my parents could be worth
the effort in the long run. I took off my bonnet, let my hair down, and waved
to him. Sometimes it was worth it to please myself too.

The
captain introduced himself and his crew; both of his sons. The boys couldn't
have been over ten years old. My father said they were cousins of cousins or
something like that so I had nothing to worry about. I wondered who was first
to get into the life boats; women or children. I was fairly certain that it was
passengers before crew.

It
was the longest four hours of my life. I couldn't find a comfortable place to
sit so I stood at the back of the boat. I was the only passenger on an old,
rotting, steam-powered, dirty, noisy, stinking boat. I kept trying to cheer
myself up by telling myself it could only get better. Then I would discover
something else wrong to ruin my mood; like that rat.

I
finally saw the coast of England and the boat kept going. I was worried that
the Captain would never find a port. Did he know that any place with dirt would
be fine by me? Another eternity passed by before the captain pulled the boat up
through an islet and tied it off at the end of a dock.

I
stepped off the ferry onto the dock. This was a small fishing village and it
appeared deserted. Either all the residents were out in their boats or
something really nasty had happened here. Seeing as there were plenty of boats
here, I suspected the latter. I saw no more than a dozen residences along the
shore. They seemed to be well cared for, but currently vacant. There should
have been at least one person to greet new arrivals. The captain of the boat
must have sensed something was wrong too.

He
asked, "Are you sure you want me to leave you here? We can bring you
somewhere else; anywhere else. This place just feels bad to me."

"Sure,
I can take care of myself!" I thought about the way I had said that and
realised it was too abrasive for the situation. I looked back at the captain
and smiled to defuse the words. "Thank you for the concern, but this is
where I need to be."

I
was feeling that anywhere was better than back on that boat. I gave the captain
a mock salute, picked up my case, and walked down the dock. I didn't see any
people, pets, or farm animals; just a bunch of gulls looking for food.

I
called out. "Hello! Is anyone around?"

Have
they all gone on holiday? That wouldn't make sense for a whole village to leave
at the same time. Are they all at church? Not on a Tuesday afternoon. I found
the door to the pub unlocked. There was no-one in it, so I went through the
storeroom and put what I deemed useful in a convenient cloth sack. I will have
something to snack on when my carriage arrived. The bread looked a few days
old, but was still edible. I left what I figured everything was worth in case
the owner ever returned.

My
ride to the tournament was supposed to be waiting for me. Perhaps the village
was empty when it arrived and the driver left quickly. I waited impatiently for
another hour in case the carriage was detained. Since nothing arrived, I had no
choice but to set off down the road on foot. My father always stressed the
value of good walking boots over stylish shoes. I was glad that was one of
times I had listened to his advice.

After
a few hours I stopped and rested. If I had known I would be walking, I would
have packed less. The portmanteau in one hand, the bag in the other, and my
rifle slung over my shoulder were getting to be too much. I would welcome any
kind of pack animal or wheeled vehicle to lighten my load. Once events had
occurred as planned, I would have had one. I also would already be at a hotel
taking a hot bath.

I
was getting indecisive. The thoughts were racing through my head. I was
reflecting on the things I had done today. Perhaps I should have waited in the
village. There could be someone at their home now. Once the villagers came
back, they might not take kindly to me taking without asking, even though I did
pay for it. My ride could be waiting for me. However, the carriage would have
had to go past me to get to the village since this was the only road. A couple
slices of soda bread and some lemonade helped to improve my mood. I felt like
singing too.

Oh
where have you been Billy boy, Billy boy,
Oh, where have you been, charming Billy?
I have been to seek a wife,
She's the joy of my life.
She's a young thing and cannot leave her mother.
[i]

It
was too bad my friend, Bevin, wasn't with me to play her concertina. People
said that we sounded good together. I would have enjoyed someone to talk with
as well.

It
was getting dark when I discovered that I had lost track of time and had just
been walking, almost without thinking about it. Now I needed to be more concerned
about somewhere to spend the night. I wondered if everyone had been taken by
something that only comes out at night. I had passed many farmhouses and barns
today and not seen any sign that they were occupied.

There
was a light off to my left in the distance. It wasn't the yellowish colour of
gaslights, but a bright blue-white glow. The road was going away from it, but
that didn't matter to me. I hoped there was someone who could tell me where
everyone else had gone. Hopefully not someone responsible for their absence.
With that thought, I unslung my rifle, grabbed a handful of cartridges, and
loaded one.

I
headed directly towards the light through a sparsely wooded area. I reached a
clearing, undoubtedly cleared by a farmer whose barn was in sight about 200
yards away. Somewhere inside was where the light originated. I could barely
hear voices coming from it. It was some kind of argument from what I could
tell. I wondered what I should do. I could give a shout and once they greeted
me in return, I could tell that they were friendly. I could get closer and see
what they were doing. Or I could wait here for them to do or say something that
would let me know their intentions. The last one seemed best so I sat down on
my portmanteau to wait.

"I
talk in the English speech because it annoys the section leader."

"Their
voices are so annoying to hear unlike our beautiful speech."

"It
also frightens the earthlings when we talk about our plans for them. I love to
see them in pain."

"Can
you help me process the ones in the back?"

"Have
your steam-powered servant do it. Is that not why you built it?"

"It
will not perform. First it will not kill, and then it will not destroy
dwellings. Now it will not round up stray earthlings."

"Why
do you keep it?"

 "I
am disconnecting it piece by piece. I like to see it suffer, just like
them."

"High
quality parts are difficult to bring here. Melt down whatever you took from
them and start over."

I
was unsure who was talking or what they meant, however I did understand they
were not friendly. I moved quietly along the edge of the woods until I had a
view straight through the barn doors. I hoped I would remain unseen in the dark
due to their eyes being used to the bright light inside. They had three legs
and four arms. Their arms had three joints that could be called elbows on each
one. Sometimes, they would put one arm on the ground and bring a leg up to
perform a task. Their heads were shaped like eggs with the widest part at the
bottom. I found their forms repulsive and it sickened me.

Those
things mentioned they were processing earthlings. What did that mean? I guessed
earthlings meant people. Or did it mean people and farm animals? They couldn't
process everyone in the town at one time and keep them all in one barn. How
long could I stay here out of sight before they noticed me? I could just
continue on and look for someplace else to spend the night. Would they find me
later and process me? I had so many questions and no answers.

"Something
is outside in the clearing."

"Is
it natural?"

"No,
it is too big."

"I
will deal with it."

"Must
I remind you to leave nothing for the earthlings to find."

"I
know."

How
did they know I was here? I wasn't making any noise. And now one was coming
out. It was clear that it was not to invite me in for tea. Would it do me any
good to hide? I backed up to hide behind the nearest tree as quietly as I
could.

The
being came out of the barn. It had lamps in two of its hands and pistols in the
other two. It walked directly towards me.

It
said, "It is no use hiding. We know where you are."

I
brought my rifle up to my shoulder and sighted on the creature. The bright
light behind it made that a challenge. "I mean you no harm, but I will
shoot if you come any further," I responded.

It
replied, "If you be quiet and come with me, I will not have to hurt you...
much."

It
continued towards me, dodging to the left and right faster than a person could.
I guessed the extra leg gave it an advantage. I didn't know if it understood me
as what it said was not a reply to me, but I tried again. "Keep away from
me!" I shouted. "This is your last warning."

"I
cannot let you get away. You must be processed."

It
dodged to its right, then back to the left, trying to draw my aim. I hadn't the
time to adjust, so it had just moved back into my sights. I fired a warning
shot, aiming to its left. Suddenly, it dodged that way. It must have been hit
since it dropped to the ground. I could see the other one in the barn. It
was panicking; running
around in circles with all four arms waving about. I dropped it to the ground
with my next shot.

I
cautiously approached the barn to see if the beings were dead or just waiting
for me. Their heads not only resembled eggs, but must have been as fragile. A
close look showed that they had exploded when the bullets hit them. That was
too close of a look as the smell was overpowering and I lost what little I had
eaten.

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