Undeniable (3 page)

I totally struck out.

Depressed, I walked back to the table and sat across from Sage.

Sage tried not to laugh. He smirked and stared at me.

At least he didn’t kick me when I was down. I pulled out my wallet and tossed the hundred-dollar bill at him. “Congratulations.”

He pocketed it. “Thank you.”

CHAPTER SIX

Alaska

The photo shoot was going well.

The groom-to-be dipped her down then kissed her, smiling while he did it. She giggled then looked up at him with warmth in her eyes. I snapped a few shots, using my special lens. It captured close shots without running the clarity.

When he picked her up again, she kept laughing, nervous. Then he cupped her face and kissed her. Her laughter ceased immediately and she melted into him. I almost forgot to take the picture because I was so entranced by them.

I’d done a lot of these shoots, but never before had I taken a picture of a couple more in love. He stared at her like she was the only thing in the world. Their affection was natural and spontaneous. I didn’t need to direct them or show them how to move. They did everything on their own.

Jace and I were nothing like that.

We used to be affectionate all the time. He couldn’t keep his hands off me, and his lips caressed my body obsessively. He wanted to be in the bedroom all the time, making love to me until I screamed his name.

Now he cared more about baseball games and hitting the bars with his friends. He was always too tired from work to do anything. He was attracted to other women more than he was to me.

Was I doing something wrong? Had I gained weight? Maybe I wasn’t fulfilling his needs? I wasn’t sure.

Realizing I was getting distracted, I finished their photoshoot and got more pictures than I’d ever need.

“You guys are cute,” I said with a smile.

The bride smiled. “No, my fiancé makes us cute.”

He rubbed his nose against hers. “I just think we’re adorable together.”

I would be lying if I said I wasn’t jealous.

We packed up everything and parted ways. “I’ll have these ready for you in a week.”

“Awesome.” The groom shook my hand. “Thank you so much.”

“Of course.” I hugged the bride then got into my beat up Ford. It was made in 1980 and didn’t have an AC. But it was my grandfather’s and I could never get rid of it. They didn’t make them like this anymore. I rolled down the window and took advantage of the San Diego breeze.

When I got home, I got to work on the picture. I had all the equipment I needed to enhance and edit each one. I used
Photoshop
but I tried to limit the number of alterations on people. While I wanted them to look good, I didn’t want them to be so altered that it wasn’t believable. Besides, every person I’d ever photographed was beautiful. I didn’t need to do anything.

I had an interview with a gallery tomorrow. I wanted to sell some of my photographs in an established and respected gallery. While I loved doing freelance photography, I wanted to be respected as a real artist. And I took pictures of things besides people. Actually, it was my favorite type of photography.

My phone rang and I saw Jace’s name on the screen.

I was nervous to talk to him, and not in a good way. Things were different now. I couldn’t put my thumb on it, but our relationship had changed in a negative way. I didn’t want to sit down and talk about it, but I didn’t know what else to do at this point. I answered it. “Hello?”

“Hey, baby. Sorry it took so long to get back to you.”

“It’s okay.”
I’m used to it anyway.

“Something wrong? You sound down.”

He finally noticed
. “Can we get coffee or something?” I preferred to have this conversation in a public place. If we broke up, which I had a feeling we would, I didn’t want to kick him out of my apartment or leave his house.

“Coffee?”

We never got coffee so I understood why he thought it was odd. “Just somewhere we can talk.”

He was quiet for a while. “Is this because of lunch the other day?”

I didn’t want to have this conversation over the phone. “Can we just meet somewhere?”

“I’ll just come to your apartment.”

I sighed. “Fine.”

“I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

I hung up without saying goodbye. I guess I didn’t realize how mad I was until now. I got back to work and tried not to think about it.

A few minutes later, he knocked on my door.

The anxiety pooled in my stomach. I took a deep breath before I walked to the door and opened it.

The concern was in his eyes. He studied my face, examining my lips and eyes. “Hey.”

“Hi…”

The tension was obvious to both of us.

He came inside and shut the door behind him. “Alaska, what’s going on?” He kept his arms by his sides but he still seemed threatening. He was jittery, uncomfortable. I could hear the fear in his voice. If he was so scared I was going to dump him, then why didn’t he act happier to be with me?

“Let’s sit down.”

He sighed and clenched his fists before he did as I asked.

I stared at my kitchen while I felt his heated gaze on me.

“Alaska?”

“I just feel like our relationship isn’t the same anymore. You don’t look at me the way you used to. You’re always too tired after work to see me. You don’t touch me anymore. When we first got together, you couldn’t keep your hands off me, and now I’m lucky if you hold my hand. We used to have sex nonstop and now it seems like you aren’t interested in it anymore. And when we went to lunch the other day…you seemed more attracted to our waitress than you’ve ever been to me…” I swallowed the lump in my throat. The moisture built up in my eyes but I blinked them away. I tried not to be emotional around anyone. “If you aren’t happy anymore, I understand. If it’s time to call it quits, I accept that. But I don’t want to waste my time anymore. If you want to break up, then let’s do it. If our relationship is dead, it’s time we both walked away before we start to resent each other.”

He stared at me, his face unreadable. He took several minutes to process what I said. I didn’t think he would say anything at all because time stretched for so long. “I don’t want to break up.”

I wasn’t expecting him to say that.

“I’m sorry I’ve been a shitty boyfriend to you. I let work and life weigh me down. It’s not you, Alaska. It’s me. I’m sorry I hurt you and made you question everything.”

I finally looked at him. “You still want to be with me?”

He grabbed my hand. “Of course I do. I guess I get caught up at work. When you see the things I’ve seen…sometimes it’s hard not to think about them.”

I couldn’t even begin to imagine. “Yeah…”

He scooted closer to me on the couch. “I’ll be better from now on.”

That was all I needed to hear. “Okay.”

Later that night, I walked with him to his car.

“You didn’t need to walk me.” He held my hand while we stood in front of his car.

“I don’t mind. I prefer being outside anyway.”

“I’ve noticed.” He smiled slightly then kissed my forehead. “I’ll see you later.”

“Okay.”

He gave me a warm kiss before he dropped my hand and got into his car. I waited for him to drive away and head down the road. I stood outside for an extra minute, relishing the cool breeze.

I expected to be single by the end of tonight, but surprisingly, he wanted to make it work. He said he would be different, be my boyfriend again. And so far, he kept his word. This is what I wanted, and I’m glad I said something to him. Perhaps if I had communicated better from the beginning, none of this would have happened. Maybe all of this was my fault.

A car pulled into the space beside mine. It was a white BMW, and it looked cleaner than a sterile surgery room. The engine was so quiet it was almost unnoticeable.

I decided to go back inside so I wouldn’t have to make small talk with one of my new neighbors. I headed up the stairs then turned to my apartment. I heard footsteps behind me, close behind me.

When I reached my door, I turned around.

The guy from the bar was staring at me, his eyes wide. He was standing in front of the apartment across from me, wearing light blue scrubs. His keys were in his hand.

I was so surprised to see him I didn’t know what to say. What are the odds of this happening? Judging the surprise on his face, he didn’t know what to say either. I felt bad for him. It was pretty clear he preferred meaningless sex instead of passionate relationships. He cared more about the expensive car he drove and the amount in his bank account instead of things that mattered, like friendship, love, and respect. It was a lot to gather from someone I only spoke to for five minutes, but as a photographer, I could read people pretty well. Body language and keen subjects gave me all the information I needed to know.

He kept staring at me, like he wasn’t sure if I was real.

Should I say hi? He was going to be my neighbor so I may as well get along with him. “Good night.”

Speechless, he watched me walk into my apartment. I had a feeling he was still there long after I shut the door.

I was nervous for my interview. I arrived at the gallery with my portfolio. In order to shake off the nerves I felt, I examined the art for sale. Getting lost in someone else’s world was a great way to feel calm.

I found a line of paintings on the wall. They were bright and beautiful. Each one featured a woman. She was wearing a sun hat with a yellow dress. She was in different places, sitting in a tire swing, walking a dog on the beach. And there was another that particularly caught my interest. The woman was wrapped in the arms of her lover. The sheets were smothered around them, covering their private areas. His chest was to her back and his face was nuzzled in her neck. The woman looked peaceful, safe. The detail of every aspect of the painting was phenomenal. I felt everything the painter wanted me to feel.

“Do you like it?” Rydell asked.

I was caught off guard by his presence. I didn’t even notice his approach. “It’s…wonderful.”

“It’s one of my favorites too.”

I needed to have it. “How much?”

He walked to the painting and checked the price tag. “Seven-hundred.”

Way out of my price range.
“Oh.”

“This artist is very famous here in San Diego. But her work is worth every penny.”

“It really is.” I couldn’t stop staring at it.

A young woman appeared beside me. “You like it?”

I had no idea who she was. “It’s fantastic.”

“Thank you.” She smiled and a blush overcame her cheeks.

I cocked an eyebrow.

Rydell cleared his throat. “This is Livia, the artist.”

I turned back to her, surprised. She was so young but so talented. “You’re amazing,” I blurted.

“Thank you again.”

And she was humble. “But I can’t take all the credit. My boyfriend inspired this piece.”

“You two love each other very much,” I blurted.

She studied my face. “Are you an artist?”

I held up my portfolio. “A photographer. I’m hoping to sell my work in this gallery.”

“Can I see?” she asked excitedly.

“Sure.” I handed it over.

Rydell came beside her and they looked at it together.

They said nothing while they examined each piece. Rydell rubbed his chin while he looked over her shoulder. Livia didn’t blink every time she looked at a picture. Her eyes roamed to every corner.

Now I was really nervous.

“These are amazing,” Livia said. “They remind me of my own pieces.”

Wow. That was a compliment.

“I’m an awe too,” Rydell added. “I think it’s safe to say we’d love to feature your work here.”

What? Seriously?
“Really?” I couldn’t hide my surprise.

“Yes.” Rydell smiled at me. “I don’t accept new artists very often, but I want these. I know people will buy them.”

My cheeks were starting to turn red.

Livia smiled at me. “Welcome to the family.”

CHAPTER SEVEN

Ash

I knew I had a new neighbor, but I had no idea it was
her
.

The hottest girl in the damn world.

I made such an idiot out of myself last time we spoke. She probably loathed me and thought I was a creep that had no game. Now I had to see her every day. I might run into her on Sundays when I went outside to grab the paper. We might check our mail at the same time.

I was doomed.

I had my clinical shift in the afternoon, so I decided to do my laundry in the morning. I usually got too distracted during the day, and a week would pass without getting it done. But I was out of gym clothes and underwear, so something needed to be cleaned.

I went down to the laundry room then opened the washer. There were delicates inside—woman’s delicates. A lacy black bra and a few thongs were inside. They were dry and abandoned. I looked around and realized no one was around. Perhaps they forgot their things?

I shrugged then pulled everything out, putting it off to the side. I wrapped my hand in a towel so I wouldn’t have to touch anything directly.

Gross.

Then I threw my stuff inside.

“Excuse me?” A beautiful voice reached my ears. It made the hair stand up on the back of my neck. Without turning around, I knew who it was. Only one woman could sound like that. My body had become entranced to her presence and appearance. Even if I were blindfolded, I would know it was she. The smell of lavender was heavy.

I turned around. “Hey there.”
Hey there? God, I sounded like a douchebag.

She didn’t look happy. “You can’t wait your turn?”

Huh?
“Sorry?”

“My clothes.  You just decided to move them and do your laundry instead? Sorry, doc. Other people have places to be too. Maybe we don’t save lives, but we’re still important.”

I was pretty sure she hated me
. “I…I didn’t know they were yours.”

She put her hands on her hips. “Regardless of who they belong to, you were still rude.”

“I didn’t know if the owner was coming back.”

She held up her laundry soap. “I just ran back to pick up this. I was gone less than a minute.”

Her attitude was starting to get on my nerves. “I’m sorry. I did what any other person would do.”

“Not me.” She walked over to a different machine and put her laundry soap on it. “I would have just used the other machine.”

“It’s out of order,” I snapped.

“No, it isn’t,” she hissed. She threw her clothes inside then started it. “See?”

It wasn’t working last time I was down here. “I didn’t know, geez.”

“Looks like someone cheated on their MCAT…”

I had a very short fuse and it was hard for me to hold my tongue. I said whatever came to mind and didn’t hold back. And I couldn’t keep my attitude in check with her. “Are you on your period or something?”

She turned to me, her eyes wide. “I just don’t like jerks.”

“Jerks? When was I ever a jerk to you?” I clenched my fist while I stared her down.

She started to mimic me. “Oh, I’m in medical school. Look in my wallet and see how much money I have. Oh, look at my flashy car. Okay, now that you’ve seen my resume, can we cut the shit and fuck at my place?” She rolled her eyes. “Despicable.”

Okay, I did come off bad
. “I politely asked if you wanted to hook up. So what? People do that.”

“I don’t.”

I had to admit I was disappointed. “Maybe you wouldn’t be such a bitch if you got laid once in a while.”

She flashed me a look of hatred.

Damn, why did I say that?
“I take it back.” I said it before she could open her mouth and reciprocate. “I’m sorry.” I held up my hand. “Sorry.”

She growled then moved to the chair in the corner, taking out her laptop. She didn’t look at me again.

After I stared at her for a moment, I threw my stuff in the washer and started it.

Then it became awkward. She stared at her laptop and ignored me. I stood in the corner and played with my phone. When I got tired of standing, I sat in a chair, a foot between us. Curious to see what she was going, I peeked at her screen.

I expected her to be on
Facebook
or looking at her own selfies but she wasn’t. She using
Photoshop
to crop and enhance an image of the foothills. A silhouette was in the background, a woman’s silhouette. “Did you take that?” I blurted.

She flashed me that same look of annoyance. “Maybe you should mind your own business.”

“I was just curious, geez. It’s not like you work for the government.”

“How do you know I don’t?” she challenged.

“Then I really want to know what that picture is for.”

She turned her gaze back to the screen.

“If that is a picture taken by you, you are very talented.” Maybe a compliment would douse the heat between us.

She glanced at me from the corner of her eye. “Thank you.” There was no venom.

Phew. We made some progress.
“When did you move in?”

“About a week ago.” She changed the color of the background slightly, and cropped a rock in the distance.

“You like it so far?”

“I did until I realized you were my neighbor.”

I smirked. “Well, I’m a nice guy. I’ll get your paper for you when you are on vacation and I’m pretty quiet.”

“No roommates?” she asked.

“I’m alone.” I wanted to make sure she knew that. “Are you alone?”
Say yes.

“I don’t have any roommates.”

“Cool.”
Cool?
“So, what do you do for a living?”

“I’m a photographer.” She saved the image then exited out of the program.

I wasn’t expecting that. “Oh.”

“Oh?” She eyed me. “Why are you surprised?”

“I just assumed you would be the subject of the picture, not the person behind the lens.”

She cocked an eyebrow. “What?”

“I thought you were a model or something.”

She chuckled. “No, definitely not.”

Why was that funny?
“How long have you been doing it?”

“For a few years. I do free lance stuff but I’m trying to get better gigs.”

“Judging that picture, I’m sure you’ll go far.” I wasn’t feeding her a line.

“Thanks…”

I wanted our conversation to keep going. “My sister is an artist.”

“Really?” She seemed interested. “What does she do? Paint? Sculpt?”

“She’s a painter. And she’s very good.”

“I guess you’re the analytical one of the family.”

I shrugged. “She’s way smarter than I am. She just applies it in a different way.”

She looked at me again. “You’re fond of her?”

“I hate her but I love her. You wouldn’t understand my meaning unless you had a sibling.”

“I do. I have a younger sister.”

That must have been her friend at the bar. “Then you do.” I leaned back in the chair and crossed my foot at my knee.

“A little too well.” She laughed lightly.

Silence ensued again. Talking to her was nice. Most of the time I was annoyed with girls. They talked too much and said things I didn’t care about. I had to pretend I was listening most of the time. But Alaska seemed cool.

She was wearing yoga pants and a yellow t-shirt. Her legs looked nice but I hadn’t gotten a look at her ass yet. I’m sure it looked fucking wonderful. Being near her made me think dirty thoughts. I wanted to pin her to my bed and pound her pussy hard and fast. I was a good-looking guy. She must be attracted to me too. “The laundry is going to take awhile…”

She didn’t pick up on my hint.

“We could go to my place and pass the time…”

She looked me straight in the eye. “Doing what?”

I had a feeling she already knew. I sat up and leaned toward her, giving her my best smolder. “Whatever you want, baby.”

She cringed. “You’re gross.”

What…?

“Why do you do that?

“Do what?”

“We were having a great conversation and then you tried to have sex with me. I made it pretty clear I’m not a one-night stand kind of girl. And you ask in such a sleazy way. I’m sure you get girls to do it all the time, but call me old-fashioned or call me classy, but that’s not how I roll.”

She should have just slapped me in the face. It would have hurt less.

She rolled her eyes then turned her attention back to her computer.

That blew up in my face. I stayed silent while I waited for my laundry. She didn’t try to make conversation and neither did I. My pride was wounded and now I was in a bad mood. I could score any girl that I wanted, but then when a really spectacular girl came along, I couldn’t have her. It wasn’t fair.

When her laundry was finally done, she pulled it out of the dryer, giving me a gorgeous view of her ass.

I shoved my fist in my mouth because it looked so nice.

She folded her laundry, keeping her back to me.

I let myself fantasize about her. Her legs were thin and toned, and she had a tiny waist. Her shoulders were slim and her hair reached down her back.

When she finished, she didn’t turn around. “Are you done staring at my ass?”

Fuck, how did she know that?

I looked up and noticed the mirror on the wall. The angle was perfect for her to see my face on the other side of the room.

Just shoot me.

She grabbed her basket and walked out.

Yeah…she hated me.

It was another night at the hospital. It wouldn’t be so bad if I were getting paid. Doing this for free wasn’t exactly fulfilling. I checked my patient’s lab work before I walked inside. Her blood thinners weren’t helping. Heparin didn’t work and her D-dimer was still through the roof.

Surgery was looking like a greater possibility.

I avoided such drastic measures as much as possible. No matter how simple a procedure was, it was still surgery, and the side effects were usually worse than the procedure itself. She could get an infection or worse. In terms of medicine, I was a conservative. I always postponed serious decisions as long as possible, hoping something else would come up.

I walked inside and began my work.

She didn’t look happy to see me. She glanced at me then ignored me.

“Hello, Mrs. Patelo.” I said it right this time.

Her eyes turned to me. “Wow. You finally remembered.”

I smiled. “Or did you prefer the other name?”

“What do you think?” she challenged.

I got to work and took care of my patient. When I sat on my stool at the foot of the bed, I checked the swelling of her leg. It was still greater than I wanted it to be. In my line of sight, I noticed the book on her nightstand. It was untouched.

I pulled her gown back down and made my notes. Then I stood up. “Is there anything you need before I leave?”

Here it comes.

She stared at the soap opera on the TV. The volume wasn’t working so she was watching the subtitles. “No.”

No? She wasn’t going to bug me?

“Bye, Dr. James.”

Okay. That was too easy.

She seemed down today. “Mrs. Patelo, is there something on your mind?”

She shrugged. “I’m stuck in the hospital. That’s about it.”

I flipped through her chart quickly. “Where’s Mr. Patelo?”

“He died a few years ago.” She said it without sadness, just calm acceptance.

“Oh. Your children?”

She was quiet for a while. “I don’t have any children.”

“I thought you said you have a granddaughter?”

“I do. Actually, I have two. But their parents are worthless and horrible people. I want nothing to do with them, and they better not come near my grandbabies.” She said it calmly, without any rage.

I didn’t realize she was so lonely. I sat back down on the stool. Silence stretched for a while as I sat beside her. The pity rose in my heart, something I hadn’t felt in a long time.

Then I grabbed the book on her nightstand. “Can I read to you?”

For the first time, she smiled at me. “I would love that.”

I examined the cover. “
Harry Potter
?”

“It’s one of my favorite books.”

“I’ve never read it.”

“Now you will.”

I smiled then opened the book. Then I began to read.

She stared at my face while I read through the pages. The reading level was low, so it was easy to get through. I felt awkward at first but it became more natural as time went by.

When I got a page from my supervising physician, I shut the book. “I have to go.”