To Begin Anew (Blue Jay Romance) (9 page)

Cathy looked around her, noticed that there were more people coming out of their homes, their noses twitching at the kind of gossip she made her living off of, and like an animal that senses when a bigger animal is close, she backed off the porch and scurried to her car. Her toadies followed as if they were attached to her by leashes.

Once Cathy’s van was gone and most of her neighbors were back in their homes, Debra sighed her relief. She turned, went back inside and just as soon as she lifted her eyes they caught the concerned eyes of Dr. Nelson. Beneath his concern was a flush of embarrassment followed by a good mix of anger.

Eric heard most of the last bit of the conversation Debra had with the newswoman on her porch and mostly it was because David had the sense to wake him up, his face twisted in concern.

When Eric’s eyes met Debra’s, a mix of emotion ran through him, settling on anger. They had no right to encroach on his private life, to treat him as if they owned him and could publicize everything he did. No matter what he’d seen on the television, or what he knew was flying around about him and his ‘nannies’, there was nothing that was going to keep him from setting things right again. The first step was explaining things to Debra.

“Boys, why don’t you go make your beds for Miss Brown, okay?” Eric doubted highly that without help David and Danny would be able to make their beds with any sort of effectiveness, but that was sort of the point. Once they disappeared down the hall, he gave a slight shrug before he pointed to the kitchen were the coffee pot looked too inviting for words. They’d talk over caffeine.

~*~*~

Debra sipped her coffee and attempted to listen to Dr. Nelson apologize for something that wasn’t entirely his fault. Sure, there were certain causal effects, that without his presence could have triggered certain other events to happen, but they were not intentional and she wasn’t mad at him for it. If anything, she would have loved to have made good on her promise to Cathy and slugged her a good one - a right hook worthy of a night in jail.

“So you see, if I’d made better choices none of this would have happened and then…”

Debra cut the man off before he could get started on a another series of apologies. “Dr. Nelson, there’s nothing you should be sorry for. I understood what she was after and, trust me, I didn’t find her insinuation humorous, but if there’s one thing I’ve learned living here, it’s that there’s always something going on and news gets old real fast. Maybe you’re the flavor of the month for that busybody now, but in another month or so she’ll have to move on to someone else. And then what? You’ll have wasted all your apologies on me.”

Eric frowned. In all of that, the only thing he cared about was how she’d addressed him. “Dr. Nelson? You can’t just call me Eric?”

Debra took a swig of her coffee, watched as Dr. Nelson waggled his eyebrows at her, and then she shrugged as she fought hard not to smile at him. He was cute, maybe more than cute, and if she wasn’t careful she was going to find him charming. She rolled her eyes and took another drink from her coffee mug in an effort to hide the smile that threatened to erupt on her lips.

Eric shrugged, thinking that it might take some more time before Debra thought of him as a friend - he certainly thought of them that way. How could he not after the first meeting they had? And he was content that at least he could get her eyes to smile at him if nothing else.

He said, “I was hoping to take the boys to church this Sunday, but I think with what’s going on right now, it might be better if I have them stay with my mother for the weekend.”

Debra’s brows knitted in confusion and he smiled for a second at how cute that made her face before he replied, “She lives in the next town over, didn’t I ever tell you that? It was one of the reasons I chose this particular small town in the middle of nowhere as compared to the hundreds of other little towns in the middle of nowhere that I could’ve chosen from.”

The corners of her beautiful mouth curled up slightly and a sparkle of pride for her hometown came into those mesmerizing eyes. Eric stared into them for several moments, lost in the wonderment of whatever glories there were behind them in her mind.

He smiled. “It wouldn’t take but a few hours and then I’d be back in town.” It was then a brilliant idea struck him, an idea that he was certain would have occurred to him naturally if he’d given it the chance, “How about we go have dinner together again, maybe see a movie?”

Debra looked at Dr. Nelson as if his forehead had decided to spontaneously grow an ear right between his eyes. She opened her mouth to say something to the fact that she’d be washing her hair in the effort to make it all fall out, but then the boys were bouncing down the hall and into the kitchen, their little ears twitching just as she caught the barest glimpses of their wagging tails.

~*~*~

Eric looked at his boys with a hearty smile, loving the way they seemed to brighten any given space they seemed to be in, and he remembered that the smiles they wore on their tiny angel faces had been the same smile on their mother’s face that he’d fallen in love with all those years ago.

“How would you two feel about going to see Nanna this weekend?”

As if an invisible pin appeared out of nowhere and popped them both like twin balloons, David’s and Danny’s faces fell.

“No! Daddy, you promised we could go to church!” David’s voice was shrill, his eyes watering as if tiny little water guns had been placed in his tear ducts. Danny was right behind him, his small arms wrapping around himself - it was his natural defense against things that bothered him.

Eric frowned, wondering why it was that his boys had developed such a need to be in church every Sunday and before he could say anything both of them turned and ran, returning to the bedroom that they had claimed as theirs while they stayed in Debra’s house.

He moved to get up from his seat, but before he could make a motion to go after his boys, Debra put a hand on his shoulder.

“I think I know what this is about. Let me take care of them, okay?” It wasn’t so much a request as it was a statement.

Eric frowned at her. “With all due respect, I think I know them better than you do.”

Debra shrugged, almost smiling at the tiny little bit of jealously that Dr. Nelson showed in his features. She replied, “Could you trust me just a little? I bet I can have them with their shoes on and their hair brushed in ten minutes.”

With that, Debra didn’t wait for permission and she sauntered down the hall. She came to a stop at the bedroom door, tilting her head at the sight of twin figures on double beds, their arms wrapped around pillows crying silently.

She went to David, knowing that he was the mastermind behind the plan the pair had going, and as she placed a hand on his back, she said softly, “David? Come on David, turn and look at me.”

David did as Miss Brown asked, sniffling, his tiny body shaking from the emotion it was too small to contain and with his round, innocent eyes, he asked, “Do I have to go to Nanna’s?”

Debra nodded, her hand rubbing the small of David’s back. Danny was out of his bed and sitting next to her. As he cuddled up to her hesitantly, she wrapped her free arm around him. The boy was shy, so shy, but in a way because he was so quiet, Debra knew there was a strength to Danny that David - the older and bolder of the two - didn’t possess.

Debra said, “If you go to your grandmother’s house this weekend, I’ll promise to help you make your wish next Sunday.” She watched as David thought this proposal through, saw as his little face factored in how long it was from one Sunday to the next and when he smiled, she knew she had him. Debra said, “If you want, I can hold onto your frog for you. You know, so that it’s safe until you get back. Would you like me to do that for you?”

David sat up in the bed, wiped his running nose with the back of his hand, then reached into his pocket and pulled out his prized possession. He rolled the frog between his fingertips for a moment before he handed it off to Miss Brown and as she took it from him, he said, “Don’t lose it, okay? I promised Mommy that I would make a wish.”

It was as if the other shoe had dropped. Debra could picture what it was like for the boys then, knew what it was like from experience, and understood in an instant how important something as silly as placing a little sliver frog in a collection basket could be. To them it was the world.

“I’ll guard it with my life,” she said, and just as the last word left her lips, she scruffled David’s head and hugged Danny so tight to her she thought she was about to suffocate him. After their moment was over, she let both of them go and said, “Now, you have to go and put your shoes on and grab your school stuff for me. Go put your backpacks at the door and then meet me in the bathroom so you can both brush your teeth and comb your hair.”

David and Danny nodded, their tears dried before they galloped out of the room, and following them, Debra tilted her chin significantly, pocketed David’s frog and returned to Eric, a smirk the size of the universe on her face.

~*~*~

Eric stared at the miles of road ahead of him that separated the town of Blue Jay from that of the larger town of Gilded Creek, and thought silently about Debra. The boys had done exactly as she’d said they’d do and once they were ready to go, they went to the car without a fuss and had been quiet the entire trip so far.

Was it some kind of magic then? What did she possess that not a woman in a hundred had at her disposal? The only person that could convince his children of anything had been their mother - she’d been the one person that truly knew them better than he did and who, with a mother’s insight, understood how their minds worked.

For a moment, back in Debra’s kitchen, he’d thought she’d channeled Tina, thought that for the smallest of seconds, Tina was walking down the hall instead of the woman he’d found in a small town who had the capacity to both frustrate and enchant him at the same time.

For a reason he couldn’t explain, once the illusion broke and he knew that it was just Debra and her natural way with children that he’d encountered, he felt a kind of grief that took him by surprise and forced his throat to attempt to close over and choke him. Still, even as he drove, as he pulled onto the main highway that led into Gilded Creek, he wondered how long it was going to take him before he gave in to his attraction to Debra, and how long it took before he lost everything all over again.

~*~*~

Debra was glad when her home was empty and felt even better once her kitchen was wiped free of the traces of small children. There was always something left behind when a child was around, always a fingerprint or smudge, and she knew that she couldn’t be satisfied until every last corner of her home was returned back to normal, back to the way she loved it.

She sat down in her living room when it was all over and just before she could get comfortable, just before she could have turned on the television or taken a nap or done any of the hundred random things she could have done on a Saturday, she removed David’s frog from her pocket and rolled it around in her hand just as he had done.

She knew the importance of holding onto the things that reminded you of the people you’d lost. Something like a last wish couldn’t hold a candle to anything in existence and even though she knew that David was young, his little mind didn’t place any less value on it because of that. To him, nothing else mattered than doing whatever it was that his mother had asked him to do. From what he’d told her, it wasn’t hard to guess.

As she pondered the minds of little children, she wasn’t aware when her hand curled over the little object she held, squeezed it tight and made a silent prayer that his wish could come true. If for no other reason than for the happiness of two sweet little boys.

~*~*~

She ran with the man through the darkness. Though he was just a man, he was her husband, she knew. She didn’t have to see his face to know the warmth that passed from his hand to hers was meant just for her, that the knowledge of love in his eyes, even though invisible in the darkness, was hers and hers alone to cherish and recognize. She knew equally as well that the same love echoed in her expression.

As she ran, she hoped with an almost feverish urgency that she would find the precious thing she was looking for, that she wouldn’t be too late. She needed to be forgiven, needed to know that she could be forgiven, that the wrongs she committed could be made right and whole again.

The man at her side was strong and capable, his strength at times the glue that held her bound together, that kept the family she’d built with him tethered to the Earth. His grip was tight as they ran, but as apparent as it seemed that they would never run out of space to glide through the ink and blackness, their journey was at an end.