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Authors: Marion Zimmer Bradley

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There was a maiden of the Fair People of the Wood, Kierestelli by name, which is to say
Crystal
in the valley speech. The legends say much of her beauty, but beauty dwells in the eyes of love and not in any

single feature. In those days there was an evil queen in the forest, and she drove out Kierestelli to

wander long in the woods alone, to flee into the lands of the valley people, and there she met with the

Lord of Carthon, by the wells of Reuel. He took her home to his castle in the ancient city that now lies

drowned in the Bay of Dreams, beyond the isle of Mormallor, and there she dwelt in happiness; but

word came that she was held prisoner there, and the chieri lords sent a great treasure in gold and jewels—

for they knew that the People of the Valley valued these things, which are nothing to the chieri folk—for her ransom. But Kierestelli chose to remain with the Lord of Carthon, because she loved him; so the

Lord of Carthon sent back all the treasure but a single gold ring, which was long a treasure in the house of Hastur.

The treasure of the forest folk is a legend in the Venza Mountains, for when the Lord of Carthon sent it

back, the caravan was waylaid and came never to the Yellow Forest. So the sire of Kierestelli said,

'These people would keep both gold and woman,' and gathered his people for the last battle to rescue

her; but before the first arrow flew, Kierestelli came from the besieged castle, in her shift and barefoot, her hair hanging loose about her face, walking through the assembled defenders and besiegers alike, and

knelt before her father, laying her hand in her lord's, and begging them to be reconciled.

'I will not bear a child in war and terror,' she told him, and when the chieri lord saw that her body was heavy with the child of Carthon, he laid down his spear and wept, and then he called his men back into

the forest; after, they pledged friendship eternal, and there a great feast was held—they still say, in the mountains, when someone shows great honor, 'They feasted him like the Lords of Carthon.'

In the end the friendship was broken, and the chieri withdrew again across the Kadarin and into the hills beyond Carthon; but from the sons of Carthon was born Cassilda, who was the bride of Hastur, and from

whom were descended the sons of the Seven Domains."

Desideria ended her story, and her listeners sat silent for a moment. Then David, seizing on a salient

point, said:

"They speak of a
woman
of the chieri . . . ."

"That is the way she appeared to your people,' Keral said quietly. "To me what seems important about this tale—and it may well be true—is that a child was born between human and chieri, without madness

or fear. I have known long that the Comyn people here on Darkover bore the blood of my people in your

veins. We chieri think of you as our far grandchildren. And so, although we die, some part of our folk

survives, even at far remove."

David asked, "But where does the red hair come from?"

"I'm not sure," Jason said, "but I've studied Darkovan history; there's a theory, you know, that Darkover was originally colonized by one of the 'lost ships'—ships from the 21st and 22nd centuries, before the

Terran Empire, before the hyperdrives, when so many ships vanished and were never heard of again.

Red hair—adrenal function—is commonplace in one or two old Earth strains, particularly the highland

Celts who were said to be psychic—second sight. Possibly this became fixed in the telepath line."

Desideria said, "I think I mentioned the belief among matrix workers—the redder the hair, the stronger the gift. But there was also a theory that very intense psychic work would make a Keeper go gray early.

My own hair turned white almost overnight after the Sharra contacts."

"So did mine," said Regis in a low voice.

"Partial adrenal exhaustion?" Jason theorized.

"In the mountains where I had my home," Desideria said, "I heard many tales of the chieri, how fair they were. There is an old song. I cannot recall it now," her brow furrowed in a strange, inward-turned

attempt at recall, "which tells of a chieri woman seeking for her mortal lover, not knowing—so long

they live—that in the years between, her lover had grown old and died…"

Missy said, not looking up, her voice almost a whisper, "Before I knew what I was… only once did I

ever think I loved; I remained young, a child in looks and years, and he grew old, old… ."

Her voice died. Keral reached out quietly, across Conner, and touched her hand. She smiled, a brief sad

glint of a smile, and was silent. Regis reached for Linnea's hand, drew her fingers under his arm.

"Always—a
woman
of the chieri," David murmured, hardly aware that he spoke aloud.

Linnea raised her eyes and looked at Keral. She said, "I am not idly curious, believe me. But I have heard strange things, in legend. Legends lie;
to lie like an old song
, is a proverb with us. Tell me this, then. Is it true that your people take a mate but once, and if death or misfortune part you, seek never for another?"

"Not entirely true," said Keral, "although it is true that once our hearts and emotions are set on one, we seldom seek elsewhere. I am speaking from the long memory of my people, not from my own

experience, you understand, Lady. Rare is the chieri who comes not to his lover untouched—as she to

him. It is not that we demand this, it is simply that all things come in season; and we do not, as we say, seek fruit in spring, or blossom from a winter bough…" He sighed. "It is not only that we desire no other; we can endure no other, as a common thing. And this is why we died, our people… Perhaps it is

Evanda's way to cancel the gift of long life she gave us when the world was shaped. Our women are able

to bear for only—I know not your words—
cuere
—one turn of the seasons? A year? Yes; maybe one

year in a hundred, and sometimes for many
cueru
at a time, those of us in male phase can sow only barren seed. So rarely does it happen, as you can see, that both would come together,
raiva
—ripened for mating: one to engender, and his mate to conceive, in a single season. So fewer and fewer children were

born to us. There are exceptions. There are times when one of us, desperate to bear, would seek another

mate. Yet, it has ever been a bitter, hard thing, and seldom can any one of our people bring herself to

this. Something in our blood will not allow it, as I have told you."

Linnea said: "Is it true then, what else they say—that your people lie down together—" she used the courtly and evasive casta word,
accandir
, but spoke calmly and without embarrassment, "only when they desire children?"

Keral laughed aloud. "
That
tale, at least, is false—or else it would make us a strange folk indeed! No, Linnea, I suppose we come together like any other people in this world, or any other world, for

consolation in loneliness, for pleasure, for heart's ease. But—except in the madness of the Change—it is

not a drive, a compulsion. Not a need, but a pleasantness, as with music, or dancing."

David said slowly, "A people without divided sexes, then, without an overwhelming sex drive—"

"Would have a low survival factor," Jason said; and Regis added, "Something of this has come down in our blood from you. I've known for many years that among telepaths the sexual drive is lower than in

ordinary man."

Conner, who had not spoken aloud yet, said quietly from where he sat in shadow, "This makes sense.

Those with 'closed minds' have no way to reach one another except in the blind touching of bodies in sex

…"

"And sex can be a deeper contact," said Linnea gravely, "or it can—if you're doing intense telepathic work—act as a kind of static, so disruptive that it was believed, for a long time, that a Keeper must be a virgin. Most of them aren't, these days—I'm not—but some care is needed. Men doing heavy telepath

work in the matrix screens are impotent a good deal of the time."

Desideria nodded. "When I was a girl, it was believed a Keeper must be a virgin," she said. "I was banned from my place with my first love; I found soon that I had not lost my powers, but it was years

before I had the courage to use them again."

"Another thing," said Linnea, looking straight at David, "among the Comyn telepaths men and women are not regarded as so different, and it is common enough for young girls to fall in love, first, with other girls, and young boys with their playmates."

"It's not unknown among Terrans either," said Jason, "but the taboo is very strong."

Regis said, holding Linnea's hand, "For me, this was a frightful conflict. I was brought so young to know that I was the last male Hastur; my father died so young, my grandfather so old. From my earliest

childhood I came to feel they regarded me only as
seed
. I came to hate women, for a time. I felt at ease only with other men, my kinsmen and cousins . …" He looked quickly, smiling, at Danilo.

David laughed. "They could have solved that in the Empire," he said; "they'd have had you contributing to a sperm bank." He chuckled at Regis' look of noncomprehension and explained, and had the

surprising experience of seeing Regis Hastur blushing. Evidently sex wasn't quite the no-taboo thing

among telepaths that he had been led to believe. Silently he reflected that despite the strong taboo on

overt homosexual behavior in Terran cultures, he had often felt closer rapport with his male friends in

the hospital than with most women.


You establish rapport quickly
, from Regis.

I'm not homosexual!

Would it matter so much if you were?
Regis caught them all up quickly in the swift net of rapport.

Conner and Missy, their fingers lightly intertwined, fair and dark, dropped a curious bittersweet note

into the contact; a swift touch of warmth from Desideria,
I love you all, although none of you has ever
touched me or will
; a strange tense reaching from Keral, still hesitant and filled with fear…


the preliminaries of love play… how break this deadlock

There was a long silence. Outside the glass, soft snow beat on the panes and a silent wind whirled, white against the darkness. In Keral's mind was a picture of a forest, lying quiet under snow, light forms

moving in a snowflake dance through the bare trees and groves… a moment they all felt the soft

blowing through the chieri grove as it lay silent in the winter twilight.

Then Regis said softly, aloud:

"Among my people they say that when men come together with men, or women with women, as lovers—

we call it the
donas amizu
, the gift of friends—it is recognition of a deeper truth. That within every woman is a hidden man; within every man, a hidden woman. And it is to this inner self, the polar

opposite of your own, that you give your love."

"The
animus
and the
anima
," Jason murmured.

"And in the chieri," Missy said softly, "the inner side is not hidden, and lies nearer to the surface. This is new to me, too…"

"—
but not a thing of shame
."

And once again the intense awareness caught them all up, Regis, Linnea, Desideria holding them all

together in a close bond. David suddenly knew that he had found his own truth. Man or woman? He

touched Conner for a moment and sensed a like sense of homecoming; felt Linnea nestling like a flower

in his consciousness, reached out briefly with his hands, drew her close and kissed her lips; felt himself embraced quickly by Jason; dropped in and out of swift awareness; Missy flaring like a comet across his

senses; the swift stir of warmth and love that was Desideria; returning to Keral with a sense of

homecoming.

He knew, now, that although they would be afraid of each other again, the deadlock of shame and fear

had been broken, and he and Keral would somehow find a way to one another.

The rapport slid apart, and they were separated. But David knew he would never be alone again.

Even as they drew apart, an undertone of mirth ran through their minds, still lightly linked, with Linnea's laughing protest:

"I love your kinsman, Regis; but must he go wherever we go? Will Danilo sleep at our feet? Can we

never be alone?"

And the quick, sobering answer: "Would you meet Melora's fate? Alone?"

And as the contact fell apart into its last disappearing shreds, a scrap of thought that there were some

things even a bodyguard could not do.

Chapter 13

Contents - Prev/Next

WHEN THEY SEPARATED, quietly and without leavetakings (what for? They knew they would

always be together), David and Keral walked home quietly across the city, guided by the lights of the

Terran HQ like a vast white tower in the clearing dark. They clung lightly to each other's hands as they

walked, but neither spoke much until, as they passed through the spaceport gates, Keral said, as if

answering David's words, "I don't care, now, if they know."

"No."

"Contact with Conner brought Missy back from the worst madness of the Change."

They did not speak again, but went quietly up to the rooms assigned to David. It had the familiarity,

now, of home.

Taking advantage of privilege, David had supper sent to their rooms, and they ate together in a growing

sense of closeness and isolation, deepened by awareness of the falling, insulating snow, all around them.

Keral was in the merriest of moods, and it was infectious; everything either of them said seemed witty,

and they kept going off into gales of mad laughter, from a dim awareness that somehow their very

presence was funny in a solemn way. What had they been afraid of? David suddenly became aware that

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