The UN Series Complete Box Set (163 page)

“Found her,” Missy announces as she enters with a nurse behind her.

I smile up at her, feeling at peace. And I must say, the only thing better than that feeling is the love I have for her.

******

“So how did Jonathan know where we were at?” I ask Slade and Parker as we sit in my living room. I’ve been out of the hospital for a week and this is pretty much all I’ve done. Sit on the couch or lie down in bed. It’s irritating. I’m begging Slade to put me to work, but between Missy and Sam, it’s not happening.

“As far as we know, Officer White tracked down Jonathan once he found out who you were. Guess he thought he could use that to his advantage to get Sam but it put a kink in his plans when he found he was in jail,” Slade explains.

“So he pulled some strings and got the ball rolling on his release. The fucker died before it could be finished,” Parker adds as he’s texting on his phone. He finishes the text and then looks up to me. “Officer Howard then tried to finish the process, it just took him longer because he didn’t have as much pull.” He shrugs. “That’s why we couldn’t find him. He was in Oklahoma working on that.”

I sigh as I try get comfortable. “Well…” I say, pulling the pillow out from behind my back and throwing it to the floor. Missy has them everywhere. She says it helps keep me propped up, but I hate the bastards. They get in the way! “At least it’s all over now,” I say leaning back into my recliner. Much better.

“There’s still one thing that needs to be taken care of,” Parker says, and I raise an eyebrow in question. “Dallas.”

Ah. Dallas is the drug dealer that Slade and I beat the shit out of to get information on Sam when she was kidnapped. “What about him?”

“I’ve got a tip that he was also involved on giving your and Missy’s location out to Jonathan.”

That is surprising. “He’s in jail,” I state. “How would he know anything?”

Parker rolls his eyes. “People talk in prison. Especially a big drug dealer like Dallas. One you used to buy from.”

Now I roll my eyes. “So what? You want me to go see him and ask why he gave away information. I’m afraid shit doesn’t work that way. You know that.”

He smiles. “I plan on taking care of it.”

Parker has become the friend that you’re glad to have around. “You seem to be cleaning up a lot of shit lately,” I say.

He nods “Yes. Well…” He stands. “You guys seem to be finding a lot of trouble these days, and I’m not about to let these bastards get away with it.” His phone chimes and he looks down to it and smiles. “Now if you guys will excuse me. I just got a pic of a wet pussy that needs my attention,” he announces before walking out of the living room.

“How are you doing?” Slade asks once we are alone.

“Good,” I say. “If I could just get used to Missy treating me like a child, it would be better.” She won’t let me do anything for myself. Seriously, I can’t even get up to piss without her trying to walk me to the bathroom. And getting snippy with her doesn’t work. She just snaps back. And I love it!

Slade laughs. “Well, get use to that. And wait til you have children. They get worse once they really hit mommy mode.”

I feel the pain in my chest return. Most still don’t know about our baby that Missy lost. She’s not ready to tell them and I get that. She has still yet to tell me about the burial. And I haven’t brought it up either. I want her to tell me when she’s ready. Truth is, I’m trying to prepare myself as well. When she opens up and tells me that, I want to be able to show her that I’m here by her side, holding her hand. I want to be there with her when she feels like going to visit all we have left of our child. And I’m not sure I could do that at this moment.

“Hey, guys,” Missy says, walking into the living room with a bottle of water in her hand. She stops in front of me and holds out the bottle of water and her other hand. It holds a little pill. “It’s time for your medicine,” she says with a smile. It’s a cruel smile. She knows I refuse to take that shit.

I shake my head. “I’m fine.”

The smile slowly fades from her face, and she all but growls. She places the water in my left hand and then the pill in my right. She then turns around and picks up the pillow off the floor. She smacks it, dusting off the cat hair. “Take it or I’m calling your doctor and dragging your ass back in to see him today!” she demands before turning around and stomping out of the room.

Slade chuckles and says, “Might as well just do what she says,” as he stands. “I’ll get out of here, so you can rest, but I’ll be back tomorrow with Sam and Sadey.”

I nod my head as I pop the pill in my mouth and undo the cap of my water. I swallow it down and face the TV with a scowl on my face. I turn it down quickly, though, when I hear Missy talking in the kitchen.

“He’s doing well, I just gave him his meds,” she says and I roll my eyes. “Absolutely. One sec.” She comes back in and hands me the phone. “It’s your mother.”

I take the phone from her and put it up to my ear. “Hi, Mom.”

“Hey, honey. Missy says you’re doing much better,” she says. She went back to Alaska after our talk in my hospital room. But she calls to check on me every day.

“I am,” I say as I yawn. I need to get back into the gym. All I do is sleep and eat everything Missy cooks me. I’ve gained like ten pounds. I need some motivation.

She’s quiet for a few seconds. “I wish I was there to help out, but Missy seems to have it under control.”

I find myself missing her. Missing all the time that I wasted feeling angry. I left Alaska as soon as I was eighteen. I go back often but it’s work related; I’ve never even stopped by to see her or call her when I go. “Maybe Missy and I can come up there once I’m back to normal,” I find myself saying. It’s time I let Missy into my life and show her everything that I have to offer her.

“Really?” she asks in total surprise, and I smile. “That would be great.”

“Yeah. Really.”

******

MISSY

Tate has been out of the hospital for a month now. And he’s doing pretty well. I broke the lease on my apartment and moved in with him and Parker. It has been interesting to say the least. I’ve had to physically kick two girls out that Parker had invited over. I swear some of the girls he finds come right off of the streets. That guy has the worse taste in women.

Tate has been on edge the last week. He’s not throwing things or yelling, but I can tell that something is eating at him. And I’ve decided not to bother him about it. He knows I’m here for him and when he’s ready, he’ll let me in.

It could also be the fact that we just landed in Alaska. He actually wanted to visit his mother and wanted me to meet his aunt. I couldn’t tell him no. I know he’s not a hundred percent with his mom, but they’re slowly getting there. I actually hear him laugh or watch him smile when she calls to check on him. It warms my heart to know that he had the chance to make things right with her.

He leans over the backseat of the taxi and gives him directions. “Where are we going?” I ask, looking over at him.

He smiles back at me. That beautiful smile that he gives me all the time now. The one that he allows everyone to see more often than not. “It’s a surprise,” he says wiggling his eyebrows.

I laugh at his playfulness and lean into him getting comfortable. We ride in silence for a little ways and then I see a marina in the distance.
Thought we were going to his mother’s?

He gets out and offers me his hand. I take it before I climb out. Brrr. I close the jacket around myself tightly, trying to keep out the cold wind.

He nods to the driver and he just sits there while Tate pulls me down a wooden walkway. We come to the end of it and take a right. “Wow,” I say when I see the ocean out in front of us. “It’s beautiful up here.”

“Yes it is,” he agrees.

“Do you ever miss it?” I ask, picking up my pace to keep up with him.

He shrugs but gives no answer. We walk all the way down to the end and come to a stop in front of a boat. I guess that’s what you would call it.

“What do you think?” he asks, gesturing to it.

Uh. “It’s a boat.” I state the obvious, and he laughs at me.

“You are correct. What do you think of it?”

I guess it was once white but it’s now rusted. “It’s nice,” I say.

He laughs and I look over at him in surprise. “You are a horrible liar, babe,” he says before he starts to walk to the boat.

“What are you doing?” I ask once he steps onto it. “This is trespassing. You can go to jail.” I look around quickly to see if anyone else can see us.

“No one’s going to jail,” he states as he leans over and reaches out for me. “Come on.”

I take his hand reluctantly and board the boat. “This is mine,” he states once I’m standing in front of him

“Yours?” I repeat looking around it. “What do you mean? You bought it?” Why would he buy a boat that looks like it would sink?

“I bought this boat about six years ago. This is how Jonathan met my mother. He owned shrimp boats up here. I thought it was a good investment. When I had enough money saved up, I used some of his contacts and bought this boat.” He smiles down at me with a proud smile on his face. “I could buy a bigger and better one, but I can’t get rid of her.”

I stand there and look at him in shock. We all knew that he had made random trips to Alaska but none of us ever knew why. We knew it wasn’t because of his mother. Now I know why. And it also explains all the money that he makes.

“I don’t know what to say,” I whisper, looking around it.

He walks up to me and places his hands on my shoulders. “I don’t wanna keep anything from you, Missy.” He takes a deep breath. “I wanna share everything I am with you.”

I smile up at him. “I have one more surprise,” he says and I pull away from him and turn around half expecting something crazy to jump out at me. Tate has been a different person since the accident, but I can tell that he still fights with the demons in his dreams. I just think they are different demons now. He talks in his sleep. Sometimes I hear him say Mom. Every now and then he says my name but the thing he says the most is
baby
. And I know that he is referring to our baby. I know he feels loss there just as I do.

“What is it…?” I ask turning back to face him. I stop myself and look down at him. “Tate?” I whisper as I look at him wide-eyed.

He looks up to me while down on one knee. “Missy. We all have regrets. And my biggest regret was walking away from you when you were right in front of me. You took a chance on me when I had nothing to offer you. And you always stood by me, even on the bad days. This is me, Missy. On my knee before you asking you to take another chance on me. Asking you to never give up on me—the good you see inside of me—even when I don’t.” He pauses and I place my hand on my chest trying to calm down my painfully beating heart. “This is me.” He opens his hands wide. “Showing you everything I have to offer. Please give me one last chance to prove to you that I’m the one for you.” He smiles that cocky smile that I love so much. He doesn’t look nervous. He doesn’t look mad. He looks confident and happy.

“I will,” I say through the tears and lump in my throat. I love him! Not because I love him so much but because of how far he has come. How much he is willing to love himself. He finally believes he’s worthy of something, and I’m lucky to be that girl.

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

TATE

I sit in Sam and Slade’s living room next to Missy. We just got back from Alaska this morning. It was a short trip—only a couple of days—but I promised my mother that we would return soon.

My sister and her husband sit on their couch facing us. I have never felt more nervous in all of my life. Not even when I proposed to Missy. She’s it for me and I knew she loved me and that she was going to say yes to me.

Fear! I feel an overwhelming amount of it. My hands are sweaty, my heart is racing, and my ears are ringing. It’s bad enough I have to admit things to my sister, let alone in front of her husband and my fiancée.

I rub my shaky hands on my worn-out jeans and Missy reaches over to take my left hand in hers. I look up at her and she gives me a small smile and I can’t help but smile back at her. She had done this same thing just a couple of nights ago. We sat down with everyone and she told them what had happened to her and our baby. Although it ripped her apart I was proud of her. That secret was just too much for her to bear. I want her to be just as proud of me as I am her.

I take a deep breath before I look into the bright green eyes that sit across from me. It’s crazy how much she looks like her mother, Marie.

“It’s okay,” Missy whispers, before squeezing my hand and I nod my head. It is going to be okay. I want to be free. I want to let my past go so Missy and I can move forward.

“I…Uh…I don’t even know where to begin,” I say letting out a long breath.

Sam smiles. “You don’t have to tell me anything if you’re not ready, Tate.”

I nod. I know that, but I’m ready. This is the next step for me. I remove my hand from Missy’s and run it over my unshaven face. “I was seven when I found out that Jonathan wasn’t my dad,” I say, and she frowns. “I had gotten suspended from school that day for starting a fight in class. They didn’t expect me to be home so early,” I say. I can still remember him screaming and her begging him to stop dragging her by her hair. “He kept telling her that he was going to beat the bastard child when he returned home from school.” I shake my head at how stupid I was. I had still loved him at that point, still thought that he was my daddy—I just hated myself. Missy has taught me that I didn’t know any better. “I made my way into the house and I heard them back in their bedroom. He was yelling at her, calling her a fucking whore. And that she was stupid to think that Jack would ever want her. That he was still in love with Marie.” I look down to my shaking hands and let out a long breath. “Then he told her that if she told Jack I was his son, he would take me from her. That he would make me see the truth of what a worthless piece of shit she truly was.” I look up to my sister sitting across from me and her bright green eyes are now red and tears run down her face. Her husband sits next to her holding her hand, as he looks down at the floor.

Fuck! I wish I could be anywhere but here. I wish I could do anything but bare this part of my soul—the ugly part, the dark part that eats me alive every day. I hope this helps set me free.

“What did you do?” she asks, and her voice wavers.

“I was a coward back then.” I look away from her, not wanting her to see how weak I truly was.
You were only a child, Tate.
Missy’s words come back to me. “I ran out of the house. When I returned later that evening, he was nowhere to be found. I told my mother that I knew Jack wasn’t my father. She cried. She begged me just like she had begged him so many times. She said that Jonathan was right. Jack would take me from her. He wouldn’t truly want me. Or love me. I was the bastard child after all.” Sam gasps at my mother’s once harsh words. They weren’t true though. The truth was that she just didn’t want me to live without her. She didn’t want me to leave her behind with him. The monster, the one that she chose to love.

Sam jumps up from the couch and runs over to me. She throws her arms around my shoulders so hard it knocks the wind out of me. I reach around slowly and hug her back, and I feel her body gently shake.

She lets go and pulls away. “Dad would have been proud to call you his son. He would have loved you then, and he would love you now,” she says through the tears with a smile on her face. “If Dad believed in anything, it was love.” She looks away from me and over to Missy. She, too, has tears running down her face.

“We all love you, Tate. And you never have to live alone in the darkness again.”

I smile over at her, and I know she’s telling me the truth. The clouds have cleared and all I can see is the sun staring back at me. I would rather go blind, knowing that the sun beats down on me, than live in the darkness freezing to death.