The UN Series Complete Box Set (162 page)

“If she gets hurt…”

“You’ll what?” He takes a step toward me. “Kill me?” he asks as if that would be an absurd idea. “You failed once at that. Surely, you wouldn’t try it again…”

I lower the gun a little bit and fire. The sound of the gunshot and his scream makes my ears ring and I smile. He falls to the ground grabbing his knee.

“I will,” I say as the adrenaline pumps through me. I look up when I hear someone entering and see that it’s Slade running in. He looks me up and down—looking to see if I was the one who was just shot or if I was the one to fire the gun.

“Anything?” I ask. Parker swore he’d call Slade the moment he reached her. He shakes his head.

With ringing ears and shaking limbs, I lean down in front of him and press the gun to his temple. “Last time. Where is she?”

Jonathan looks up at Slade and his light blue eyes harden. “How is your wife and daughter doing?” he asks and my heart stops. What could he possibly know about Sam and Sadey?

Slade stands there and stares down at him in total shock.

Jonathan chuckles. “She is just as stupid as her mother,” he says referring to my sister and her mother Marie. “She had no idea that Tate was her brother.” Then he looks up at me. “Hell, Laura would drop you off over there at Marie’s almost every day and she never suspected that you were the son of the man that she loved.”

“Stop,” I demand.

He doesn’t. “Jack was a good man. I’ll give him that,” he says as he leans back and grunts as he tightens his hand over his knee. “Too bad the guy died in that awful car wreck,” he says with a heavy sigh. He then places his free hand over his heart mockingly. “But everything happens for a reason…”

I pause for a second. The way he said it... “What are you saying?” I ask, feeling my chest tighten.

He gives me a smile that makes him look like the devil himself. “I’m saying it’s amazing what you can accomplish from prison.”

“You had him killed?” I ask as I try to take in a deep breath. He had my father killed? “Why?” I ask and my teeth clench. “Because I belonged to him?” I ask my voice rising.

“I never fucking cared about you,” he spits out. “I had it done because that son of a bitch deserved to die!” he shouts. “Your whore of a mother loved him. She was so in love with him…”

I lower the gun and swing it, hitting him across the face. I go to jump on him but Slade grabs a hold of me and pulls me back. I go to push him off but he spins me around. “Don’t,” he says firmly. “Don’t be like him.” He shakes his head.

“How can you say that?” I demand ripping my arm from his hold “He just admitted to killing your wife’s father.”

We both turn to look over our shoulder down at Jonathan as he laughs. Blood runs down his face and he holds his knee tightly. Then his laugh cuts off as he start to cough. He looks up at me. “You might be Jack’s bastard child but you will forever be like me.” He smiles showing off his bloody mouth. “We’re one and the same.”

“I’m nothing like you,” I say shaking my head. Missy has taught me that. He continues to smile and I lift the gun and point it at his face once again. “Tell me where she is.” This is his last chance.

The smile drops off of his face and his eyes narrow on me. I start to pull the trigger. I’ll find her myself. I don’t need him in order for me to save her. I’ll tear down this entire city block by block until I have her back in my arms.

“Goodbye, you son of a bitch,” I say and pull it back but I hear the chime from the front door as it opens.

“Tate?” Missy’s panic voice calls for me.

“Stop.” I then hear Parker’s demanding voice shout.

Before Slade and I can react, the door swings open and I see the beautiful blond run into the kitchen. Her eyes land on mine and she sighs in relief as a smile spreads across her face. She looks down to the floor and it drops off as she stares behind me and gasps in terror. I spin around her just in time to see Jonathan produce a gun out from behind his back.

My heart stops as he lifts it and points it right at her. “I want you to feel the loss that I have all of these years,” he states with hatred.

And I do the only thing I know to do. I’m not a monster like him. She has taught me that. I once told her that I would sacrifice myself to save here. And she has shown me that when you have a chance-take it. Here is my chance.

******

MISSY

My ears ring as gunshots sound in the bakery. I’m knocked to the floor and I can’t breathe as something is crushing me. I open my eyes, ignoring the pain in my back and head, and look up to see Tate lying on top of me with his eyes closed.

“Tate?” I call out frantically.

I can hear people shouting, but I can’t understand them. My ears are still ringing. He’s lifted up off of me and I scramble to get to him as he’s placed on the kitchen floor but arms wrap around me and pull me back. “Let them work,” Slade yells over all the commotion into my ear.

“Tate?” I cry out as I watch him lie on the tile floor. The same one that he had me down on just a month ago when I thought he was a burglar. Jonathan sits slumped over behind him. Blood runs down his chest, soaking his shirt. Dead.

Parker gets my attention as he rips Tate’s shirt off before holding pressure to his chest. I place my hand over my mouth to silence my cries as blood pools underneath him. My shirt clings to me, also soaked in his blood.

Other officers are speaking into their radios calling for an ambulance. One hovers over Tate as he gives him CPR. “Please,” I cry out. “Please save him, Parker,” I plead as I gasp for air.

Parker speaks to the officer so fast I can’t make out what he’s saying as the shirt he holds over the wound continues to soak up Tate’s blood.

“Why?” I cry out. Why would he do that? “Tate?” I scream wanting him to hear me. He has to wake up. “I love him. Please.” My body shakes in Slades arms.

It feels like an eternity as Slade holds me tightly unwilling to let me go to him. “Tate,” I yell out to him. He has to be okay. He has to live. 

The officer giving CPR checks for his pulse and then looks up to Parker.

Parker looks from him to me and I see the tears that fill his eyes and I know it. “I’m sorry, Missy,” he says and his voice breaks. My heart shatters as I watch the other officer move away from him.

He’s gone!
“No.” I shake my head not believing it. “He wouldn’t leave me,” I cry, trying to shove Slade off of me. He wouldn’t save me only to leave me. Not like this.

Parker looks up to Slade and nods his head. He releases me and I crawl to

Tate as his body continues to lie there, motionless. “Please. Tate,” I beg, placing my hands on his bloody chest. My jeans start to soak up the blood that pools beneath me. “Please don’t leave me.” I look up and see everyone staring down at me. “Why aren’t you doing anything?” I yell as hot tears run down my face and neck. 

I lean over and place my lips on his. “I love you,” I sob and my tears fall down onto his face. “Don’t be a coward,” I yell, getting mad. “Don’t stop fighting!” I demand. “Fight for me,” I plead, pressing on his chest; starting compressions myself.
I can do this.
I was in school to be a nurse after all. “Fight for us,” I demand taking in one deep breath after another.

I purse my lips as I press on his chest as hard as I can trying not to vomit from the copper smell of the blood that lingers in the room. There’s so much. It’s everywhere.

I sob as my hands slip; it’s hard, the blood that covers him is making it slippery and I can’t get a good grip.

I blink through the tears that blur my vison. “I’m begging you,” I say through gritted teeth. “Please. Don’t leave me here. I need you,” I say as my arms start to weaken.

I see Parker’s hands on my hands and he presses down, stopping me. “No,” I shout, frantically trying to push him away.

“Missy,” he snaps, grabbing my hands. He stands and yanks me up off of my feet. I try to fight him but he drags me over to the other side of the bakery and shoves me up against the wall. “Stop. I can save him,” I sob.
I was supposed to save him. I was supposed to be his chance at something better.

******

Have you ever heard that saying—no one ever really dies? A part of them lives in you? I really never thought about how true that statement is. But I had also never experienced a loss before. But it’s true, they are always there in your mind and your heart. Memories are all you have left of them.

I stare down at the gray stone. This is my first time here. I didn’t think I could do it. Facing what you lost is just like facing your worse fears. They bring back emotions that you have tried to keep hidden.

I stood up to my fears and let all of my secrets out. My mom, dad, and Laura sat there as I told them how much I loved Tate. What we shared in Vegas and about our baby. I expected to feel free, like a heavy weight lifted off of my shoulders. It didn’t. It just pulled me down even more to the point of suffocation. Without Tate there, I was drowning. Sobs racked my body and my chest felt like it was going to explode from the pressure. But with the help of their love and kind words, the weight is slowly lifting. It will take time—they said.

People say love and loss go together. That without one you can’t experience the other. Although Tate never said it, I imagine he loved me. Why else would he have jumped in front of that bullet for me? But my love for him caused me loss. That is the chance you take when you give someone your heart—the willingness to break it. And I know without a doubt I would give it to him again. He will forever have it.

I look up from the headstone as a hand softly grabs mine. I tighten my hand in hers when I see the tears slowly run down Laura’s cheeks. I knew nothing about Laura when I picked her up from the airport, except that she was once married to a monster. That she once feared for her and her son’s life every day. The day at the bakery, before Jonathan showed up, she let me into her past a little. Once we were all together—after that horrible day—I told my parents and Laura what they needed to know. I hated that it took a tragedy for me to open up to my loved ones that would have been there all along.

It’s crazy how little you know about someone. Why those chose the path they did. After I informed them of what all happened between Tate and me, she pulled me to the side and told me some secrets of her own. Talking to her helped me understand her a little bit more. All I could think about was Tate. I wish he would have answered her calls, just given her a second to explain how much she had lost before him and how much she loved him.

“I’m sorry, Missy,” she whispers as she closes her eyes. I can only imagine what memories looking at the headstone could bring for her.

“Me too.”
I’m sorry I couldn’t do anything to save you.
I say a silent goodbye. It may have taken me a while to face the loss but I won’t make that mistake again. I’ll continue to come back until the day I die.

“I love you,” I whisper as the breeze picks up and Laura pulls me into her side.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

TATE

How do you know when you’re in love? It’s a question that has confused the hell out of me. They say you have to love yourself before you can love another. I find that hard to believe. Which leads me to another question. How does a man like me go from hating the world and yourself to loving someone?

You don’t. That’s the only answer I can come up with. I can’t tell you the exact moment I fell in love with Missy. Or the moment that I realized I would die for her. It sounds crazy—that I would love her so much that I would break her heart by getting myself killed. She would spend the rest of her life hating me, but I hope that my actions proved her right. That I was a guy deserving of her.

All I know is that I love that woman more than life itself. Life is full of nothing but letdowns. And that’s all I’ve ever done for her—let her down. But for some reason, she took a chance on me.

All I’ve done with my life is fight.

Fight the demons.

Fight the darkness.

Fight myself to the point where I became tired of it. I allowed it to take over and I found it was easy to live with the hate more than myself. But Missy was able to pull me away. I could hear her cries and her words as she begged me to live for her. It reminded me of how I begged my mother to fight for me and she never did. I will do that for Missy—fight. She deserves better and now I know that I can be the better person that she believes me to be. So, from now on I will fight with all that I have to show her I’m here for her. That I’m not going anywhere! She’s it for me and without her, I can’t survive.

I open my eyes and blink a few times to clear my blurry vision. I look over to my right and see a beautiful blonde curled up on a small couch. Missy! No pillow, no blanket. She looks so cold. I go to sit up to wrap a blanket over her when I feel like a cinder block is sitting on my chest. My heart starts to pound and a bead of sweat forms on my forehead.

I try taking in a deep breath as I try to sit up once again. A strangled cry rips through my throat as fire run up my chest.

“Tate,” Missy screeches jumping up for the couch. She runs to my side. “Just sit still.” She reaches over and pushes a button on my bed. A woman’s voice fills the sterile room.

“What can I get for you?”

“He’s awake,” Missy says with excitement.

I moan as a sharp pain runs up my chest again. “He’s in a lot of pain,” she adds.

“Okay, ma’am. I will send your nurse in,” she replies.

Missy looks down at me. She gently runs her hands over the top of my head. “Welcome back,” she says softly as a smile grows on her face.

“What happened?” I ask, my voice thick and mouth dry.

Her hand pauses over my head and she smiles. “You saved me.”

“Don’t let her fool you.” I look over to the door of what I now realize is a hospital room and see Parker walk in. “She saved you,” he says with a smile.

“Jonathan,” I whisper looking back over to her. “He was gonna shoot you,” I say as I look her up and down. I remember him lifting the gun and pointing it at her.

She gives a little laugh. “You knocked me down,” she says with a smirk. “Thank you for that concussion by the way.”

“I hurt you?” I ask wide-eyed. “Are you okay?” I ask, reaching out for her.

She nods. “That was weeks ago, Tate.”

“Weeks ago?” I ask confused.

“They’ve kept you in a drug-induced coma. They brought you out of it yesterday. They said it could take you a couple of days for the fogginess to clear,” Parker says coming to sit beside me. “I’m glad you decided to come back to us,” he says with a smirk

I look up at Missy. “What were you doing there?” I look her over once again, and she’s the same beautiful blonde that I remember. Her hair is up in a messy bun. Her face is free of makeup and she’s wearing one of my oversized t-shirts with a pair of jeans. She looks as if she hasn’t slept in days but her smile is radiant. Just looking at her takes my breath away.

“I’ll let Parker explain that one,” she says.

I slowly look over at him, trying to ignore the pain in my neck. “I had everyone up at the station looking for that car. An officer called in saying he saw it run a red light. I wasn’t even gonna take the chance on him running so I had a road block set up. The bastard didn’t even try to get around it. He knew he was caught.” He smiles. “Guess who it was?”

“Who?” I ask having no clue.

“Officer Howard.” He looks over at Missy.

“Did he hurt you?” I ask trying not to get angry. I might be trying to be a better me but anyone who tries to hurt Missy will still see a glimpse of the old me.

She shakes her head. “He was just trying to help Jonathan get to you.”

“Is he dead?” I ask Parker.

He shakes his head. “Prison.”

“And Jonathan?”

“Yep.” He nods. “I pumped three bullets into that sorry bastard,” he says with a proud smile.

I chuckle and immediately regret it. “Thanks,” I say lifting my hand and he gives me a gentle fist bump.

“No need to thank me.” He looks up at Missy. “Like I said, she was the one who saved you. We all thought you were gone for good. She wasn’t having it.” Then he stands up. “I’ll let everyone know you’re awake. Get ready for the visitors,” he says with a wink, and I groan. I just wanna be alone with Missy.

“Don’t ever do that to me again,” she says getting my attention. “I was terrified that you left me,” she says, and I see the tears start to form in her blue eyes.

I reach out and grab her hand. I run my thumb over her soft knuckles and I think about what she must have gone through and how Parker said she didn’t give up on me. Guess she ended up saving me after all.

I pull softly on her hand and she bends down, placing her face in front of mine. I give her a soft kiss with just our lips touching. I pull away and place my other hand on her beautiful face. “I love you.” I say the words that I hate—the one saying that never meant shit to me. But it actually means more to me now than I could ever explain. This woman made me a better man and taught me that it’s okay to love another person. “I’ve always loved you.”

She looks at me wide-eyed for a few seconds and then a smile spreads across her face. “Just remember who said it first,” she says before she leans down and plants another kiss on my lips.

She stands up when she hears the door open to my room. I expect it to be my sister. To my surprise it’s my mother. And for once in my life I don’t want to hate her. I don’t want to blame her for the life that she chose for us.

Missy clears her throat and pats my hand. “I’ll go see what is taking that nurse so long.”

My mom takes a step closer as Missy turns and walks out but still remains over by the door. “I’m sorry, Tate,” she says quietly. “I’m sorry for everything.”

I shake my head as I look up at the ceiling. “I’m tired of fighting, Mom,” I say honestly. I look over at her and tears run down her face. “We survived. And it’s over.” I crack a smile, and she lets out a small laugh.

“Barely,” she adds, and I have to agree.

She’s quiet for a few seconds, and I close my eyes hoping Missy finds that nurse soon.

“I need to tell you the truth,”

I open my eyes and look over at my mother. “Truth about what?” I ask. “Jack?” There’s nothing she could tell me about Jack that I don’t already know. That man loved his daughter, Sam. And since Marie took care of me. Sam would always hang out with him. He treated me as if he was my father. And I’m kinda glad that he didn’t know. He would be very disappointed in the man I had become.

She takes a deep breath before she gestures to the chair that Parker was sitting in next to my bed. “May I?”

I nod. Once seated she looks down at her hands knotted in her lap. “You were brought to the hospital and rushed into surgery. They said that the possibility of brain damage was high due to how long you went without oxygen,” she explains quietly. “Missy was a wreck as we all sat in the waiting room waiting to hear if you were going to be okay. She sobbed, bloodied and exhausted. She just started rambling on about how much she loved you. Her dad was confused, to say the least.” She chuckles.

“Her father was here?” Great. Now he knows what I’ve put his daughter through. I’m only gonna survive the gunshot wound for him to kill me himself.

She nods. “She told us about Vegas and that she was pregnant.”

Shit! “No one could calm her down.” She shakes her head. “She poured her heart and soul out to us as if it would make a difference.” She sighs. “I felt I needed to do the same for her.” She pauses. “And to you.”

She closes her eyes for a second and swallows before she opens them up and looks into mine. “Jonathan wasn’t always the monster you saw him as, Tate. He was the most loving and caring man I had ever met. I met him in Alaska when he was on one of his fishing trips. We fell in love quickly, and I moved to the states with him. We decided to build our dream home. And that was where Jack came in. We hired his concrete company and I never thought twice about him. I was in love with Jonathan. It didn’t take long before we found out we were expecting a child. We were so excited.” She drops her head. “I went into labor at twenty-six weeks. I went through twelve hours of labor only to lose our baby girl.” She shakes her head. “We were devastated. Our marriage fell apart. I went into a deep depression. Everyone handles loss in their own way. He began drinking and staying out. One day Jack came by our house, he was doing some work for one of Jonathan’s friend, and he comforted me. It didn’t start off as an affair. He was a good guy. But things slowly escalated and before I knew it, we were finding time for one another. He took the pain away. Made me forget what I had lost. A child. A marriage. Everything that I thought mattered to me didn’t when I was with him. I was happy again. When I got pregnant with you, I called it off with him. Never even told him. Things went back to normal between Jonathan and me. He was excited to get another chance to be a father. We had a beautiful, healthy baby boy.”

I swallow trying to hold down my emotions. I hate the fact that she kept all of this from me, and I hate that I never even tried to find out the truth.

“I knew the moment I held you that you were Jack’s.” She sniffs. “And I hated it, I hated myself. I wanted you to belong to Jonathan. I wanted the man who had tears in his eyes as he looked down at his wife and child to be your father.” She reaches up and wipes a tear from her eye. “I thought if I told myself you were then you would magically be his.” She shakes her head. “I was stupid. You were two when he realized you belonged to Jack. He found out that I had been with Jack and confronted me. I lied. I told him that you were his, but it was too late. He already knew. He went off the deep end.” She grabs my hand and looks into my eyes. “I only ever thought of you. You have to believe me. There were nights I never slept, worried I’d wake up and find out that he hurt you or killed you.”

“Why did you stay?” No matter how much she explains this part, I will never understand.

She swallows. “He threatened me all the time. He said that if Jack knew that you were his that he would take you from me. That I would lose Marie. She was my best friend. She took care of you. I would have nobody.”

“That’s a stupid reason,” I say truthfully, and she nods her head in agreement, knowing that it was just her being selfish.

“You have to understand. You were all I had. I couldn’t lose you,” she says as she lifts her free hand and wipes the tears from her face.

I let out a long sigh, wondering where in the hell Missy was with that nurse and the drugs. My chest hurts and I’m fucking tired.

“The truth is…” She pauses. “You don’t know what it’s like unless you’re put in that situation. I was weak, Tate, but I loved you.”

“You loved him,” I add. She said it herself, she had wished I belonged to Jonathan. She had wished that awful man was my father.

“I loved you more,” she cries. “After I poured my heart out to Missy, she told me that she had buried your guys’ baby.”

My eyes widen. “She wasn’t very far along,” I say.

She pats my hand. “Like I said, Tate, people handle loss in their own way. Missy lost a part of herself. She wanted to honor that loss.”

So not only did she lose our child. She buried it—she went through everything on her own yet she still loves me.

“When we found out that you were going to come through she asked me if I would go with her to the visit the baby. She said she hadn’t been there since it happened.”

My throat tightens. “Was she…okay?” Did she break down? Did she hate me for not being there?”

She nods. “She is very strong, Tate. And that is what makes her perfect for you.”

My eyes start to sting. I’m gonna blame it on the fact that the nurse has yet to bring me pain meds. “I love her,” I say, and my mother smiles.

“I know, son. And you deserve happiness.”

“Did you love him? My dad?” Her eyes widen at my question. That’s the first time I have ever referred to Jack as my father.

She nods. “Very much so. There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think of him. But after I broke things off he met Marie.” She smiles brightly. “I became friends with her.” She chuckles. “Who knew she would become my best friend?” she muses. “I miss her, too,” she whispers, and I agree with her. Too many people have died in order for this family to find peace with their past.