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be content with just reckoning from the foundation of the city in the Roman way. Then chronology would be standardized. But the Greeks always want to do things in an involved way. At the last moment, just before their departure, Nero refused to allow Statilia Messalina to accompany him. As a reason, he said that he could not possibly guarantee her safety should war break out. The real reason came to light during the journey. Nero had at last found the person he had for so long been seeking, a person who in every feature resembled Poppaea. He was called Sporus and was unfortunately not a woman, but an indecently beautiful youth. Nevertheless the boy said that in his heart he felt more like a girl than a boy, so at his request Nero had had a certain operation performed on him and had given him medicine which an Alexandrian physician had prescribed to stop the growth of hair on his chin, to enlarge his breasts and in general develop his aphrodisiac characteristics. So that I do not have to return to this story again, for it roused much bad blood, I shall mention here that in Corinth, Nero was married to Sporus with all the usual ceremonies, and then treated him as his legal wife. Nero himself maintained that the marriage, with its dowry, veils and wedding procession, was a formality which certain mysteries demanded but which was not rightfully binding in any way. He considered himself bisexual, as are all the male gods. Alexander the Great had secured this view when he was acclaimed a god in Egypt, so Nero considered his leanings as a kind of additional evidence of his divinity. He was so sure he was right that he put up with the coarsest jokes about Sporus. For fun he once asked a senator who was known as a Stoic what he thought of this marriage. The old man replied, �Everything would be better in the world of man if your father Domitius had had a similar wife.� Nero was not angry, but laughed appreciatively at this jibe. Enough has been said about Nero�s victories in the Greek music competitions. He brought home over a thousand victory wreaths. Only in the Olympic races did things go badly for him when in a ten-horse team race he was thrown off the chariot at a corner post and only just had time to cut through the reins that were twisted about his waist. Naturally he was badly bruised, but
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in reward for his boldness, the judges unanimously awarded him a wreath. Nero himself said he could not accept the wreath of victory since he had not completed the race, and he contented himself with the olive wreaths he won in singing and wrestling in Olympia. I tell you this as an example of Nero�s physical courage in genuine danger and in demanding sports. Nero did his best to show true Greek sporting spirit and did not insult his rivals in the singing competitions as unscrupulously as in Rome. His victories were all the more deserved as he was plagued with ill luck. For a whole week he suffered the torments of toothache, until finally the aching tooth had to be extracted. The tooth broke in the process, in spite of the physician�s skill, and so the roots had to be dug out of his jaw. But Nero manfully endured the pain. Fortunately the physician could numb the pain a little and Nero made himself as drunk as possible before the operation, as would even the bravest of men before handing himself over to a dentist. People who would know better than I can decide how much his toothache and the swelling affected his voice and his performance. It seemed to me evidence of Nero�s sporting spirit that when he was offered the opportunity of being initiated into the Eleusinian mysteries, he humbly declined the honor on the grounds of his reputation as a matricide. Evil tongues of course made out that he was afraid of the punishment of the gods had he partaken in these most sacred mysteries of all time. But this was without foundation. Nero knew that he himself was as much a god as the rest of the gods of the country, although he declined this public honor from modesty. A large majority of us in the Senate were prepared to declare him a god in his lifetime, whenever he wished it. After weighing the matter, I myself also considered it best not to partake in the Eleusinian ceremonies. I explained to the priests in great confidence that I had been most painfully forced to allow my own son to be executed, although I had not known of it myself at the time, so my conscience would not allow me to insult the mysteries with my presence. Thus I managed to avoid offending the sacred priesthood and could say to Nero that out of friendship for him I was abstaining from the mysteries. In this
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way Nero�s trust in me and my friendship was even more strengthened, and this I was shortly to need. In fact there would have been far too much to explain to Claudia if I had allowed myself to be initiated. I declined for the sake of peace, even if my heart felt sore afterwards when the other senators, long after their initiation, were obviously glad to have shared in the divine secrets which no one has yet ever dared reveal to outsiders. And then the unbelievable and infamous news arrived that the Jews had scattered and defeated the Syrian legion, which had fled from Jerusalem. As a votive gift, the Jews had set up the captured legionary Eagle in their temple. I shall not mention the legion�s number or watchword, for it has been struck from the military rolls, and the Censors still refuse to allow this defeat to be mentioned in the annals of Rome. Historians in general do not like to mention the rebellion of the Jews, although Vespasian and Titus were by no means ashamed of their victory and indeed celebrated a triumph after it. The striking out of the legion was of course partly due to economy when the Parthian war came to nothing. I admit I needed all my strength of will to meet Nero�s eye when he demanded an account of what had happened from the committee for Eastern affairs. According to him, it was incomprehensible that we had not known that the rebellious Jews had strengthened the walls of Jerusalem and that they had succeeded in acquiring weapons and training troops in secret. The defeat of a whole legion could not be explained in any other way. As the youngest, I was the one who was pushed forward first to give my opinion, as was customary in war councils. Presumably my colleagues put their trust in my friendship with Nero and did not deliberately wish me ill. And I find it easy to talk. I referred to the cunning of the Parthians and the huge sums of money which Vologeses had used to tie down Rome�s military strength wherever possible. The Jews had of course been able to buy or simply accept presents of weapons from him, which could easily have been carried along the desert routes to Judaea, unnoticed by our border guards. The Jewish rebels� faith in their cause was so well known that the fact that the rebellion had been kept secret surprised no one.
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The endless troubles while Felix and Festus had been in charge of the governorship in Caesarea had lulled even the most sensible people into a false sense of security. In Judaea, as elsewhere, Roman rule presupposed that we ruled by dividing. �The greatest miracle is,� I said conclusively, �that the violently disunited sections among the Jews have been able to unite into one rebellion.� I also cautiously referred to the great power of the god of Israel, of which many conclusive examples are to be found in the holy scripts of the Jews, although he has neither an image nor a name. �But,� I said, �even if much in this matter can be understood, it is impossible to comprehend how Corbulo, in whose hands the war had been left, and despite his military reputation and his successes in Armenia, could have allowed this to happen. The responsibility lies with him and not the Syrian Proconsuls to restore order in Judaea and Galilee so that it can be a support area for further warfare. Evidently Corbulo has directed all his attention to the north and prepared the Hyrcanians for holding the Parthian troops by the sea there. But by devoting all his attention to a small detail in the larger plan, he has lost a general view of the situation, judged the situation wrongly and in this way shown that he is no strategic military leader.� This in my view was true, and anyhow no friendship bound me to Corbulo whom I did not even know. And anyhow, friendship should stand aside when the State is in danger. That principle is impressed on every senator, and of course there is one�s own life to consider too. We could not afford to spare Corbulo, whatever honors he had brought Rome. I was bold enough to remark that in my opinion the Parthian war should be postponed until the rebellion in Jerusalem had been suppressed, for this would tie down three of the legions. But fortunately the legions were already collected at their deployment areas and there were sufficient war machines to break through even the strongest of walls. The Jewish rebellion in Jerusalem could be suppressed very swiftly. I thought it much more dangerous that there were Jewish colonies in practically all the cities in the country, not to mention the thirty thousand Jews in Rome.
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Nero allowed me to speak my piece and seemed to calm down. I hurriedly added that at least the Jews in the Julius Caesar synagogue were not involved in the rebellion. This I could guarantee personally, even if their temple gifts had obviously been misused to finance the rebellion. �But,� I said, �Poppaea in all innocence sent gifts to the temple in Jerusalem.� When I fell silent, no one else dared to speak. Nero thought over the matter for a long time, frowning and pulling at his lips, then waved us impatiently away. He had other things to think about, and it would do us good to wait a while and try to guess what our punishment would be for our failure. In his capacity as Emperor his intention was to appoint a commander capable of capturing Jerusalem and to give him the necessary troops. Corbulo had already been recalled to account for what had been done and what had not. Postponing the Parthian campaign indefinitely was such a serious decision that Nero would first have to consult the omens and make a sacrifice. We left somewhat relieved, and I invited my colleagues to a good meal in my quarters. Nevertheless we found it somewhat difficult to swallow our food although my excellent cooks did their best. We talked together excitedly and drank neat wine while my guests put forward such embittered and prejudiced opinions on the Jews that I was forced to defend them. The Jews certainly had good and creditable sides, and they were in fact only defending the freedom of their own people in this rebellion. In addition, Judaea was the Emperor�s province and not the Senate�s. Nero himself was responsible for the rebellion for appointing a ruthless rogue like Festus as Procurator after Felix. Perhaps I was too eager in my defense, for my colleagues began to glance at me in surprise as the wine rose to their heads. �Evidently it is true,� one of them said contemptuously, �when it is said that you are a scarprick.� I had wanted to keep my unpleasant nickname a secret, but thanks to your bearded friend Juvenal and his verses, everyone knows it. No, I am not blaming you, my son, for deliberately leaving the verse about when you were here last, to please your father. I should indeed know what people think of me and what you
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think of your father. And poets use far worse words nowadays in what they write to annoy their elders. As nearly as I can make out, they think they are defending the truth and natural speech to counterbalance the artificial eloquence we have inherited from Seneca. Perhaps they are right. But the beard they have inherited from Titus, who brought the fashion to Rome when he came back home from Jerusalem. Naturally no one could save Corbulo. Nero did not even wish to set eyes on him again. As soon as he stepped off the warship in Cenchreae, Corbulo received orders to commit suicide. �If I had had the good fortune to live under other Emperors,� he said, �I should have conquered the whole world for Rome.� And then he threw himself on his own sword on the quay, after requesting that it should be broken and the pieces thrown into the sea so that it should not fall into unworthy hands. Nevertheless I do not believe he was a good military leader, as was proved by his faulty judgment when the greatest opportunity of his military career came within his reach. Nero had sufficient sense to resist his desire to hold a concert in Ecbatana. Skilled actor that he was, he succeeded in stumbling convincingly when he made an offering to the omens. Thus we could see with our own eyes that the immortal gods still did not wish Parthia quelled and it would be wisest to postpone the Parthian campaign to avoid devastating misfortunes. It was impossible anyhow, for Vespasian, since he had appeared and carefully acquired information on the Jews� preparations for war, was demanding at least four legions if he was to capture Jerusalem. So it was Flavius Vespasian whom Nero capriciously put at the head of the siege of Jerusalem. Vespasian protested, explaining that he was tired of war, he had won sufficient honors in Britain in his time and he regarded himself as an old man. He was perfectly content, he said, to be a member of two colleges of priests. But, aging and even more unmusical than I, he had once started to nod when Nero was taking part in a singing competition. As a punishment, Nero gave him the task of enduring the trials of a troublesome and ignominious punitive campaign. Nero did weaken in the end when, confronted by Vespasian�s tears, he consoled him by telling him that he was to receive the opportunity
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of his life to enrich himself at the expense of the Jews. He would then be able to give up dealing in mules, which was unworthy of a senator, and would no longer need to complain of his poverty. Everyone thought Vespasian�s appointment a sign of Nero�s madness, for Vespasian was despised to such an extent that even Nero�s favorite slaves were offensive to him whenever he showed himself at the Golden Palace. He was invited only once a year, on Nero�s birthday, and that favor cost him free asses for Poppaea and later for Statilia. Vespasian was in no way involved in Eastern affairs, and it would never have occurred to anyone to suggest him as a member of any committee or confidential task in the Senate. On the other hand, Ostarius, whom Claudius had once mistakenly sent to Britain and who had done well there, would gladly have led the legions to quell the Jewish rebellion as he offered only too often. As a result, Nero became suspicious, with some justification, and ordered him to be executed. And Nero�s trust in Vespasian was increased by Vespasian�s opposition to accepting the assignment, regarding it as a punishment for his drowsiness which he did not cease to curse. Nero himself was sufficiently doubtful about his choice that he demanded that Vespasian should take his son Titus with him. Titus had also done well in Britain and in his youth had once saved his father�s life. Nero hoped that Titus� youthful eagerness would encourage Vespasian and help him to carry out the task of capturing Jerusalem within a reasonable time. Nevertheless he urged Vespasian to avoid unnecessary losses, for he had heard about the strengthening of the walls of Jerusalem. Because of the city�s strategically advantageous position, even Pompey had found it difficult to capture, and Nero considered one could hardly mention the two in one breath. In Corinth, I had the opportunity of again contacting my old commander and strengthening our friendship by offering him free use as my guest of Hierex� fine new house. Vespasian was grateful to me for this. I was the only nobleman on the whole journey who treated the war-weary and simple Vespasian with any decency at all. I am not particularly prejudiced or fussy in my friends, as my life shows only too well. I regarded my happy youth under