The Mousetrap and Other Plays (4 page)

EMILY
. (
Spitefully
) Young people nowadays behave in the most disgusting fashion.

VERA
. Disgusting?

EMILY
. (
Carried away
) Yes. Low-backed evening dresses. Lying half naked on beaches. All this so-called sunbathing. An excuse for immodest conduct, nothing more. Familiarity! Christian names—drinking cocktails! And look at the young men nowadays. Decadent! Look at that young Marston. What good is he? And that Captain Lombard!

VERA
. What do you object to in Captain Lombard? I should say he was a man who'd led a very varied and interesting life.

EMILY
. The man's an adventurer. All this younger generation is no good—no good at all.

VERA
. (
Breaks to Right
) You don't like youth—I see.

EMILY
. (
Sharply
) What do you mean?

VERA
. I was just remarking that you don't like young people.

EMILY
. (
Rises; moves up Left
) And is there any reason why I should, pray?

VERA
. Oh, no—(
Pauses
) but it seems to me that you must miss an awful lot.

EMILY
. You're very impertinent.

VERA
. (
Quietly
) I'm sorry, but that's just what I think.

EMILY
. The world will never improve until we stamp out immodesty.

VERA
. (
To herself
) Quite pathological. (
Goes down Right.
)

EMILY
. (
Sharply
) What did you say?

VERA
. Nothing.

(
EMILY
sits up Left. Enter
ARMSTRONG
and
LOMBARD
Left 1, talking. They cross up Right.
)

LOMBARD
. What about the old boy—

ARMSTRONG
. He looks rather like a tortoise, don't you think so?

LOMBARD
. All judges look like tortoises. They have that venomous way of darting their heads in and out. Mr. Justice Wargrave is no exception.

ARMSTRONG
. I hadn't realized he was a judge.

LOMBARD
. Oh, yes. (
Cheerfully
) He's probably been responsible for sending more innocent people to their death than anyone in England. (
WARGRAVE
enters and looks at him.
) Hullo, you. (
To
VERA
) Do you two know each other? Mr. Armstrong—Miss Claythorne. Armstrong and I have just decided that the old boy—

VERA
. Yes, I heard you and so did he, I think.

(
WARGRAVE
moves over to
EMILY
.
EMILY
rises as she sees
WARGRAVE
approaching.
)

EMILY
. Oh, Sir Lawrence.

WARGRAVE
. Miss Brent, isn't it?

EMILY
. There's something I want to ask you. (
EMILY
indicating she wants to talk to him on the balcony
) Will you come out here?

WARGRAVE
. (
As they go
) A remarkably fine night! (
They go out Centre.
)

(
LOMBARD
up Centre.
MARSTON
enters Left 1 with
BLORE
.
They are in conversation.
)

MARSTON
. Absolutely wizard car—a super-charged Sports Mulatti Carlotta. You don't see many of them on the road. I can get over a hundred out of her.

(
VERA
sits on Right sofa.
)

BLORE
. Did you come from London?

MARSTON
. Yes, two hundred and eight miles and I did it in a bit over four hours. (
ARMSTRONG
turns and looks at him.
) Too many cars on the road, though, to keep it up. Touched ninety going over Salisbury Plain. Not too bad, eh?

ARMSTRONG
. I think you passed me on the road.

MARSTON
. Oh, yes?

ARMSTRONG
. You nearly drove me into the ditch.

MARSTON
. (
Unmoved
) Did I? Sorry. (
To above Left sofa.
)

ARMSTRONG
. If I'd seen your number, I'd have reported you.

MARSTON
. But you were footling along in the middle of the road.

ARMSTRONG
. Footling? Me footling?

BLORE
. (
To relieve atmosphere
) Oh, well, what about a drink?

MARSTON
. Good idea. (
They move towards the drinks down Right.
) Will you have one, Miss Claythorne?

(
LOMBARD
drops down towards
VERA
.)

VERA
. No, thank you.

LOMBARD
. (
Sitting beside
VERA
on sofa
) Good evening, Mrs. Owen.

VERA
. Why Mrs. Owen?

LOMBARD
. You'd make the most attractive wife for any wealthy businessman.

VERA
. Do you always flirt so outrageously?

LOMBARD
. Always.

VERA
. Oh! Well, now we know. (
She turns half away, smiling.
)

LOMBARD
. Tell me, what's old Miss Brent talking to the Judge about? She tried to buttonhole him upstairs.

VERA
. I don't know. Funny—she seemed so definite that there wasn't a Mr. Owen.

LOMBARD
. You don't think that Mrs. Owen—I mean that there isn't—that they aren't—

VERA
. What, married, you mean?

(
ROGERS
enters Left 2, switches on LIGHTS, draws curtains and exits to study up Right.
MARSTON
comes to Right end of Left sofa.
LOMBARD
rises to Left end sofa.
)

MARSTON
. Damn shame we didn't know each other. I could have given you a lift down.

VERA
. Yes, that would have been grand.

MARSTON
. Like to show you what I can do across Salisbury Plain. Tell you what—maybe we can drive back together?

(
Enter
WARGRAVE
and
EMILY
Centre.
MACKENZIE
enters; sits chair down Left.
)

VERA
. (
Surprised
) But I—(
Rising.
)

MARSTON
. But it seems damn silly. I've got an empty car.

LOMBARD
. Yes, but she likes the way she's going back and—

VERA
. (
Crosses to fireplace
) Look! Aren't they sweet? Those ten little china Indians. (
MARSTON
and
LOMBARD
scowl at each other.
) Oh, and there's the old nursery rhyme.

LOMBARD
. What are you talking about? What figures? What nursery rhyme?

VERA
. (
She points at the figures and rhyme—reading
) “Ten little Indian boys going out to dine

One choked his little self and then there were nine—” (
ROGERS
enters up Right and crosses Left.
VERA
continues reading nursery rhyme.
BLORE
crosses up to below her
;
EMILY
to above her.
)

“Nine little Indian boys sat up very late.

One overslept himself and then there were eight.”

(
Crosses Left.
)

BLORE
.

“Eight little Indian boys travelling in Devon.

One got left behind and then there were seven—”

VOICE
. (
Very slowly and clearly from off up Right
) Ladies and gentlemen, silence, please! (
ALL
rise.
EVERYBODY
stops talking and stares round at each other, at the walls. As each name is mentioned that person reacts by a sudden movement or gesture.
) You are charged with these indictments: that you did respectively and at divers times commit the following: Edward Armstrong, that you did cause the death of Louisa Mary Clees. William Henry Blore, that you brought about the death of James Stephen Landor. Emily Caroline Brent, that you were responsible for the death of Beatrice Taylor. Vera Elizabeth Claythorne, that you killed Peter Ogilvie Hamilton. (
VERA
sits Left sofa
) Philip Lombard, that you were guilty of the deaths of twenty-one men, members of an East African tribe. John Gordon MacKenzie, that you sent your wife's lover, Arthur Richmond, to his death. (
MACKENZIE
sits down Left
) Anthony James Marston, that you were guilty of the murder of John and Lucy Combes. Thomas Rogers and Ethel Rogers, that you brought about the death of Jennifer Brady. Lawrence John Wargrave, that you were guilty of the murder of Edward Seton. Prisoners at the bar, have you anything to say in your defence?

(
There is a momentary paralysed silence. Then there is a scream outside door Left 2.
LOMBARD
springs across the room to it. Indignant murmur breaks out as people recover from first shock. Door Left 2 opens to show
MRS. ROGERS
in a fallen heap.
MARSTON
springs across to
LOMBARD
.
They pick up
MRS. ROGERS
and carry her in to Right sofa.
ARMSTRONG
comes to her.
)

ARMSTRONG
. It's nothing much. She's fainted, that's all. She'll be round in a minute. Get some brandy—

BLORE
. Rogers, get some brandy.

(
ROGERS
,
shaking all over, goes out Left 2.
)

VERA
. Who was that speaking? It sounded—

MACKENZIE
. (
Above Left sofa. His hands shaking, pulling at his moustache
) What's going on here? What kind of practical joke was that?

(
BLORE
wipes face with handkerchief.
WARGRAVE
stands in the middle of room near sofas, thoughtfully stroking chin, his eyes peering suspiciously from one to the other.
)

LOMBARD
. Where the devil did that voice come from? (
They stare all round.
LOMBARD
goes into study up Right.
) Here we are.

VOICE
. You are charged with these indictments—

VERA
. Turn it off! Turn it off! It's horrible!

(
LOMBARD
switches it off.
MRS. ROGERS
groans.
)

ARMSTRONG
. A disgraceful and heartless practical joke.

WARGRAVE
. (
With significance
) So you think it's a joke, do you?

ARMSTRONG
. What else could it be?

(
EMILY
sits down Right.
)

WARGRAVE
. (
With significance
) At the moment I'm not prepared to give an opinion.

(
ROGERS
enters Left 2 with brandy and glass on tray. Puts it on table up Left.
)

MARSTON
. Who the devil turned it on, though? And set it going?

WARGRAVE
. We must enquire into that. (
He looks significantly at
ROGERS
.)

(
LOMBARD
enters up Right with record; puts it on chair Right Centre.
MRS. ROGERS
begins to move and twist.
)

MRS. ROGERS
. Oh, dear me! Oh, dear me!

(
The
OTHERS
move nearer, obscuring table where the brandy is. Attention is focused on
MRS. ROGERS
.)

ROGERS
. (
Above sofa
) Allow me, Madam. (
To
ARMSTRONG
) Allow me, sir. If I speak to her—Ethel—Ethel—(
His tone is urgent and nervous
) It's all right. All right, do you hear? Pull yourself together.

(
MRS. ROGERS
begins to gasp and moan. She tries to pull herself up. Her frightened eyes stare round the room.
)

ARMSTRONG
. (
Taking wrist
) You'll be all right now, Mrs. Rogers. Just a nasty turn.

(
BLORE
pours out brandy up Left.
)

MRS. ROGERS
. Did I faint, sir?

ARMSTRONG
. Yes.

MRS. ROGERS
. It was the voice—the awful voice—like a judgement—

(
ROGERS
makes anxious movement.
MRS. ROGERS
's eyelids flutter. She seems about to collapse again.
)

ARMSTRONG
. Where's the brandy? (
They draw back a little, disclosing it.
BLORE
gives glass to
VERA
,
who gives it to
ARMSTRONG
.
VERA
sits Left edge of sofa, holding cushion under
MRS. ROGERS
's head
) Drink this, Mrs. Rogers.

MRS. ROGERS
. (
She gulps a little. Revives. She sits up again.
) I'm all right now. I just—gave me a turn.