The Lost Soul Trilogy (Primani Book 5) (51 page)

“I think she’s in shock, Dec. Feel how cold she is? Why’s her body temp so low?” The crease between his eyes was back as he tried to warm me up.

“Hmm. That’s odd. She shouldn’t be.” He pressed his lips against my forehead like my mother did to check my temperature.

“I’m fine, mom, really. Stop worrying. I’m just cold. Someone get me a blanket or take me to bed.”

Was it my imagination or did both of them hesitate for a split second when I said that? Killian helped me up, and I swayed against him as a wave of dizziness washed over me. Scooping me up, he headed to my room. Stopping partway down the hall, he listed awkwardly into the wall. He squeezed his eyes shut and sucked in a breath of air. Without warning, the rune on his hand burst into life and mine followed. His face contorted with pain.

“What’s wrong? Put me down; you’re hurt!”

Instead of putting me down, he took a deep breath and staggered the rest of the way to my room. Sweat ran down the side of his face by the time he set me down on the bed. Afraid now, I reached out and tugged on his hand. “Killian! You have to sit down. You’re scaring me.”

“It’s nothing--” he started to say when he suddenly clutched his chest and sagged forward. His fingers grabbed at an invisible blade, fluttered, and then went still. The rune over my heart burned like a brand and I yelled for Dec.

He came running in to see Killian on his knees clutching his chest. “What is it? Demon? James?” His head swiveled as he looked for the enemy.

Killian’s eyes rolled up in his head, and he slid over to his side. Domino galloped into the room and froze in front of him. She pressed her nose against his chest and growled low in her throat. With raised hackles, she looked pointedly at me and then back to Killian.

Fix him.

Puzzled, I gawked at her for a minute until Dec touched my collar with a question in his eyes. I pulled the fabric over so he could see the rune. It was glowing hotly against my skin and stung like crazy.

Thinking hard, he proposed, “You have his blood…so you have his power. You’re an empath…hmm, you’re drawing his pain into that rune.” Running his fingers over my hand, he did the same with Killian’s hand. Both runes glowed…

“Mica, listen to me. This is demonic magic that’s hurting him. He can’t fight it alone. We have to find the demon and destroy his connection. In the meantime, you can help him.”

“Tell me what to do. I’ll do anything.”

Considering the two of us for several seconds, he finally said, “You have to harness his powers to push this demon’s magic away. Do you think you can separate Killian’s powers from yours and focus it back onto Killian?”

I thought about it and considered the words of Michael. 

Do not fear the suffering. It is the pain of others that will strengthen you for what you must do.

I didn’t know if that applied here, but he
was
suffering and I would take his pain as my own if I could. Nodding at Dec once more, I said a short prayer to Raphael hoping he’d lend me a hand. Dec helped me lay Killian on his back and pulled off the t-shirt. There was an angry red mark over his heart. It was the size and shape of a knife wound. It wasn’t an open wound, but more like a scar.

“Hold our two hands together for me. I think it helps.” He did as I asked and waited.

Thinking about how to do this, I had Dec place our joined hands on top of Killian’s heart. Closing my eyes, I waited. Come on, Killian, where are you? There it was. Killian’s heartbeat flowed through our hands and I felt it pulsing over my own heart. My heartbeat slowed to match his strong and steady rhythm.

We were truly connected. Wow.

I smiled in amazement, and Dec looked at me quizzically. Closing my eyes again, I called his magic to me. It lived in my blood, but I didn’t recognize it yet. It wasn’t a part of me. I had to let it come to me on its own.

Come on, it’s okay…come and take over…

Gradually, it bubbled up inside, tentative at first, then building, growing, gaining strength.

That’s it, take over…

Once the floodgates were opened, his power thrummed through my veins, dominating me, enhancing me, making me stronger in every way. It didn’t hurt exactly, but felt like I was stretching out of my own skin. My arms and legs stretched to compensate, my toes curled with the pressure. There wasn’t enough of me to contain it all.

Ignoring the warning signs, I channeled that power through our hands and into Killian’s chest. Whatever lingering evil there paled in comparison to Killian’s ancient power and dissipated steadily.

Killian’s mind had been hidden behind a black wall of pain but as he regained consciousness, his memories surfaced again. Our connection was so tight that I was bombarded with his memories. Before I could pull my mind away, I was swept up in an image of him holding me against his chest as a summer storm raged around us. The crash of lightning echoed in my ears as my tears ran with the rain.

Yanking my mind away, I cracked my eyes to see him looking up at me. Did he see what I saw? Was it just a random memory I stumbled into, or did he want me to see it?

How was it a memory if
I
didn’t remember it?

Maybe it was just a dream.  Maybe I imagined it…my brain was fuzzy and the wild burst of energy was in free fall. I was about to crash. Exhausted, I glanced at Dec who was staring at me with a hundred questions in his eyes.

“Is he better now?” I asked in a shaky voice. I rubbed my chest and held up bloody fingers.

“Dec, I’ve got this. Leave us for a minute. Please.” Killian was sitting up again with clear eyes. Dec reluctantly left to give us a few minutes of privacy.

Resigned, Killian said, “Sit down, Princess. Let me look at you.”

With gentle hands, he pulled my sticky shirt away to look for the source of the blood. Completely ignoring my cleavage, he focused only on the rune over my heart. There was a ragged tear in the skin underneath it. It had ripped from the inside. He touched the tear with the pad of his finger and it tingled. After a minute, the tingling stopped and the cut was gone.

“I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize this would happen to you,” he said regretfully.

“I’m confused. What’s happened?”

“I’m afraid you’re not strong enough to handle my power and it will hurt you. It could kill you.”

Kill me? Could this day get any worse?

Aloud, I said, “There is no way your powers would kill me. You love me. That love is part of your power over me. It’s our connection. You’d never let me die at your own hand.”

As soon as I said it, I realized that I shouldn’t know that. I broke off and stared at him with new eyes.

Stunned by my words, Killian was speechless. His sudden paleness was the only outward sign of his feelings.

Stuttering with embarrassment, I apologized. “I’m sorry. I don’t know where that came from.”

With a frightening ferocity that I hadn’t seen in years, he yanked me closer and growled into my ear, “You need to forget that for your own good. Do you hear me?” Flinging my hand away from him, he stalked towards the door.

“But why? Why should I forget that?” Angry too, I grabbed his arm and pulled him back to face me. My voice rose until I was yelling again. “Isn’t it true? Am I wrong?”

“Just let it go! Why do you have to push?” With lips clamped shut, he pried my fingers away from his arm.

“Tell me I’m wrong!”

The split second’s hesitation gave him away. He couldn’t deny it but the knowledge didn’t give me any pleasure. Instead, I was more confused than before. How had I missed this? I had no memory of him loving me…

Snatching up my wrist, he pressed the rune against his heart and hissed, “This was a mistake!”

Before I could respond, he whipped out his silver blade and slashed the rune in half. Its twin burned hotly for a second and then faded into a pale white scar.

The connection was broken.

Breathing heavily, he wiped a hand over his eyes and refused to look at me as he wiped my blood from the blade and jammed it into its sheath with a metallic hiss.

“Which one of you plans to explain this to Sean?”

Neither of us heard him come into the room. Dec stood with arms crossed in the doorway. His expression said he’d heard most of the conversation, and judging by the resignation in his eyes, he wasn’t shocked. What did he know?

“Dec, you know this is for her own good. She can’t be tied to both of us. It would be a disaster.” His face softened only slightly and he said to me, “It had to be done. I won’t watch my power destroy you.”

Dec seemed much older as he watched my face while I cradled the rune to my chest. It was still bleeding but I didn’t care. I was in shock over what just happened.

Mute, I stared at Killian’s eyes and wondered what was behind them. What was he thinking? Didn’t I used to know?

Why couldn’t I see now?

I felt oddly adrift as if I’d been cut away from a dock and left without a rudder. I tried to clear my mind and look for him but he wasn’t there.

Where did you go?

Don’t look for me. I won’t let you in.

I don’t understand…what’s going on?

I don’t love you, Mica.

You’re lying.

After that silent exchange, I lifted my chin and said, “Don’t disappear like you always do. The least you can do is open your Christmas present.” I got up to get it and he started to protest.

Dec laid a hand on his arm and ordered in a deadly voice, “Stay here. It’s the least you can do for her.” Under his breath, I thought I heard him say, “I hate this.”

By the time I’d gotten back to the living room, I’d put a Band-Aid on my hand and washed my face. I looked perfectly happy as I made my entrance. With a forced show of Christmas spirit, I sat a tiny wrapped box in front of Killian. I had painted the wrapping paper myself earlier in the year. Each box was unique according my visions of them. Killian’s was covered with tiny white-capped waves cresting in a brilliant blue sea.

He frowned at it.

“You’ve known me for how long now? You should be used to me giving you a present for Christmas. Don’t look so angry about it.” I tried to keep a light tone, but it sounded flat even to me. Dec hissed with frustration and got up to pace.

Instead of opening the box, Killian balanced it on his palm and said quietly, “I don’t deserve this, Princess. Save your thoughtfulness for the others.”

That hurt. Suddenly I was furious at him and snapped, “Who do you think you are? Who are you to tell me who to care about? Am I too stupid to know who’s good and who’s bad now?”

I jabbed a finger towards him and glared at Dec. “You two idiots saved my life more times than I can count. And you want to tell me that you don’t deserve a stupid Christmas present?”

He flinched at the intensity in my voice and possibly the white light that caught fire behind my eyes.

Ever the peacemaker, Dec reached out a calming hand and said, “We don’t think you’re stupid. You’re family! I’d throw myself in front of a bus for you.  I think Killian’s just trying to take a step back and…I think he’s right.” They exchanged a look that spoke volumes. “You can’t be tied to him and Sean both. It’s a disaster waiting to happen.”

“What aren’t you guys telling me? Why do I feel like I’m missing something?” My voice climbed several decibels.

Killian frowned and said, “I’m really fucking this up.”

For the first time ever, he was at a loss for words and Dec took over. Dec said, “Look, I know what happened between you two was unexpected, and I don’t blame either of you for it, but once we got Sean back it had to end. We all know that.”

“I heard what you just said, but I have no idea what you’re talking about.” I was drawing a blank. “Are we still talking about the runes?”

Dec whipped around and glared at Killian for several minutes. Killian’s scowl grew deeper and he flushed with anger. Dec threw up his hands and said sarcastically, “Well, that explains a lot.”

To me, he said between clenched teeth, “Yeah, the rune had to go.” He looked like he wanted to shove Killian’s teeth down his throat.

“Uh, okay. You two are keeping secrets from me--again.  I'm too tired to argue about it right now. Will you please just open your present?”

Killian actually smiled a little when he lifted the pendant out of the box. It was a tiny teardrop-shaped glass pendant wrapped in beaten gold braiding. I thought it looked very pagan or at least rustic. The glass was as close as I could get to the color of his eyes. It hung on a thin braided chain of leather with one strand of gold running through it. There were three strands of leather and one strand of gold. I thought it was very symbolic. I had asked the angels to bless it and I hoped they did. Although no one had popped down to tell me they had.

“Do you like it? I made it myself.”

Gruffly, he answered, “It’s great. I don’t know what to say.”

Delighted, I said, “Don’t say anything. Just wear it. It’ll keep you safe.” I came around behind him and closed the clasp. My fingers grazed the fine hair at the nape of his neck, and I had a vivid image of kissing that spot. I froze just as my lips pressed against his skin and he jumped. I backed away from him and into Dec.