The Complete Groupie Trilogy (85 page)

She lay on the bed in a miserable ball. “Julian.”

“You know it’s bad for the baby, right?”

She glared at him. “Julian supports me right now doing odd jobs and day labor. I had to ask myself which was worse, second hand smoke? Or being homeless?”

Her situation was so dire Vanni had the immediate impulse to fix it even if he wasn’t the father, which of course was Andy’s greatest fear. He reached
into his pocket for his wallet.

“I don’t want your money,” Holly repeated.

“Maybe not. But you need it.” He dug a handful of twenties from his wallet. He had stopped at an ATM on the way to Hollywood… just in case. It was a few hundred dollars he and Andy wouldn’t even miss. If Holly really was pregnant, and he suspected even more strongly that she was, then she needed it more than he did.

He considered it his job to provide it. He was
no deadbeat. Not now. Not ever.

He held out the money but she didn’t reach for it. She stared at him defiantly for long moments before he put the money on the nightstand. “It’ll hold you over until we can take the necessary tests to prove you are pregnant and it is mine. After that, we’ll discuss specifics.”

“I told you. I want it all or I want nothing. My child deserves more than a part-time parent who can check in or check out as his schedule allows. You have other priorities, and that’s not the life I want to give my child. I lived it, remember? You lived it, too. A parent needs to be totally involved or the child suffers.” Then, “You already rejected me. I’m not putting our baby through that, Vanni. I’d rather die first.”

To make her point she staggered to her feet, grabbed the bills and tossed it right in his face. “Take your goddamn money and get the hell out of here!”

Her tirade nearly knocked her off her unsteady feet. He caught her before she fell right to the floor. She felt nearly skeletal in his strong hands as he carried her back to the bed. “This isn’t about you,” he reminded with a clenched jaw. “It’s not about me. It’s not about anything other than doing the best you can for your child. I’m willing to do that,” he said as he straightened up and towered over her. “Are you?”

Tears coursed down her face. “Get out of here, Vanni. We don’t need you or your pity.” Her lip quivered as she added, “I never asked you to come.”

He knelt down by the bed so he was at eye level. “But I’m here,” he said. He reached over to brush the hair from her face. She looked like a child herself as she lay there. “Please let me help you.”

She stared into his eyes for a moment before she whispered, “Okay,” so quietly he barely heard her. His eyes traveled down her body to her stomach. Impulsively he reached over and spread his large hand over her abdomen. He could feel the tiny, firm mass nestled between her hips. It wasn’t as pronounced as his little Bean with Andy – but it was unmistakable, especially given how frighteningly thin she was.

His arm slumped to his side. “I’ll make an appointment with a doctor,” he said.

“I’m already goi
ng to a free clinic,” she said.

“Not anymore,” he assured.

He made up his mind the minute he felt that firm little spot on her tummy. She could fake a lot of things, but she couldn’t fake that. And if that baby was his, it needed him as much as his little Bean.

He wasn’t going to let either of them down.

He said nothing to Andy that night when she got home. She took note of his quiet mood but didn’t do much to draw it out. She had enough on her plate after Graham had come to see her at the studio, concerned about her now that the scandal had broken. He wanted to make sure that she knew that, no matter what, she’d have allies in her corner.

She already knew it, but it was nice to hear.

Vanni was the first to go to sleep that night, with his back to her – which was unusual. She lay awake much like he had done the night before. She caressed her tummy, watching the low light dance off of her engagement ring as she did so.

This was her life now. The promises had been made, the die had been cast. Vanni was her man and this was her family. She made a vow that no one would jeopardize their happiness… especially some two-bit con artist looking to cash in on a famous baby daddy.

Andy turned off the light and cuddled up with her future husband.

CHAPTER EIGHT

Malibu, California

February 18, 2011

The light from his laptop was the only source of light in Graham’s darkened office as he scrolled through yet another pregnancy calendar calculator online. He knew it was pointless, but ever since Andy had told him about her pregnancy, he had been unable to get the “what if” out of his mind. What if she had gotten pregnant in November, rather than October? Just a few scant weeks – that was all that separated a life committed to Vanni and a life committed to Graham. A few scant weeks – that was all that stood in between her giving birth to another man’s child in July, and her giving him the purest gift of their own baby in August.

He went through, week by week, to see how their baby would have developed, when his or heart would have started beating, when they could have announced the pregnancy to the world. She would have been 14 weeks along by then. The baby could make faces by then; an ultrasound might have even caught him sucking his thumb.

His gut hurt as he slouched against the chair. Just a few stupid weeks. Thanks to some really bad timing, he’d have to watch from the sidelines as the man who had hurt Andy the most got everything Graham wanted – and felt he deserved.

His eyes were bloodshot with unshed tears when Maggie found him a little after one in the morning. “Hey, you,” she said as she walked into the room. “Burning the midnight oil?”

He glanced up at her. She thought he was working hard on the new TV show, and it was probably better that way. The only other person who knew about Andy’s pregnancy was Shannon, who had offered her limited employment on the production for as long as she was medically released to work.

As far as everyone else in the world was concerned, the only baby Vanni was expecting was the one with Holly.

It still made Graham’s stomach turn to think of it.

Two women. Two babies. And Vanni would likely never commit himself one-hundred-percent to either one. That bastard fell ass-backward into things other people could only dream about.

Graham had minimized the window he was looking at by the time Maggie came over to stand next to his desk.

“You know me,” he joked, half smiling. “Sleep is the enemy.”

She perched on the corner of his desk. “I’m still going to get you up at eight o’clock. Sleep or no sleep. I’d advise sleep.”

He moaned as he leaned back in his chair with a teasing grin. “But Mom, it’s not a school day. Let’s sleep in late, eat cold cereal and watch cartoons like normal people.”

She laughed. “Because you’re not normal,” she told him pointedly. “And I doubt very sincerely you took over the entertainment industry sleeping in late on a Saturday.”

“Busted,” he agreed. “But,” he said as he ambled to his feet, “I think we do deserve a day off. What do you say to a drive up to Santa Barbara?”

Her eyebrow lifted. “Really?”

“Why not?” he offered as he grabbed his cane and hobbled from the office, that way she couldn’t see how he’d really spent the evening – pathetically daydreaming over things he could never have.

She followed him slowly from the room. “I just kind of thought you’d want to stay close to home base. In case you were needed.”

He glanced over his shoulder to see where she stood in the hallway, arms crossed. He sighed. “You
know me well, don’t you, Mags?”

He leaned against the wall and she walked over to face him. “You’re a good man, Graham. Too good. You can’t keep cleaning up the messes of other people. Especially when they walk into those messes willingly and happily.”

His mouth twisted into a grin of irony. She made it seem as if he somehow had a choice in the matter. “Old habits and all that,” he offered with a helpless shrug.

Her mouth opened with what could only be more advice, and warnings he couldn’t heed. He reached up with a finger over her lips and shook his head. Her blue eyes were concerned, and it was funny how he had never quite noticed how her lashes perfectly framed them without any makeup whatsoever.

He also couldn’t help but notice how soft her lips felt against his finger.

He pulled away as quickly as it took the completely inappropriate feelings to wash over him in a flood. He cleared his throat. “So. Eight o’clock, then?”

Maggie struggled to compose herself as she gave him a small nod. She said nothing at all as he turned and lumbered toward his bedroom.

By the following morning, both Maggie and Graham had slipped back into their respective roles. She drove him hard while they worked on his physical therapy, and didn’t say word one about Andy, Vanni, or their current situation.

Likewise, in a beach house many miles south of Malibu, Vanni and Andy didn’t talk about their situation either. They ate their breakfast in silence, and didn’t even talk much when her morning walk on the beach was cut short by lingering paparazzo milling around the waterside.

She stayed behind her laptop computer, corresponding with Shannon regarding
Fierce
, while Vanni tinkered around on the piano. Normally it would have been a comfortable cohabitation, but the specter of Holly hung in the air like a palpable stench.

Vanni wanted to call Holly, or at least text her, to see if she had bought food with the money he left. He wanted to recommend that she eat fruit and vegetables, and even volunteer to take her to the store if need be.

But after he thought about it, the gesture – though considerate – would generate more harm than good. His taking his “baby mama” to the store would surely hit the front page of every tabloid because PING was watching every move he made like a hawk.

He was relieved that his first covert visit to see her hadn’t been detected.

He couldn’t risk upsetting Andy any more than he could risk stoking controversy in front of their new show. The rumors swirled that he had been attached as a judge, but until the press conference the following week nothing had been officially “confirmed.”

The whole, “will he, won’t he,” aspect had every tongue in town wagging. Fans were foaming at the mouth to see their favorite rock star on their TV screens every week, so sponsors were lining up to toss money their direction.

Of course there were those who considered this potential move of his a “sell-out,” namely Yael – who was still seething in resentment that Vanni had put the brakes on Dreaming in Blue. He had already been quoted in the press about it, which – though he didn’t say as much – Andy knew was eating Vanni up inside. He hated any criticism that he’d let someone down. It was his biggest fear.

Now that he didn’t have alcohol to trip his “don’t-give-a-fuck” switch, he felt every barb and sting. He stayed away from the Internet and didn’t listen to the news. He didn’t want to hear how badly he was fucking up, when all he was really trying to do was fix what he’d already turned to shit.

As if his mood couldn’t sink any lower, Ivy Cunningham called late Friday and told him the Wilkes had withdrawn the original settlement demand and were now in a holding pattern to see what kind of payoff he’d be getting from
Fierce
. She couldn’t even guarantee him they wouldn’t take him directly to court and bypass the settlement process entirely.

It seemed his entire life had become a holding pattern while vultures circled.

Worse, there didn’t seem to be any way to make everyone happy as he tried to fix it all.

He sank further into a funk as each minute ticked by. He didn’t say anything to Andy, who juggled her own anxiety that her baby might have a half-sibling from an opportunist of a mother. She decided not to talk to Vanni about it, since it would only serve to make him feel worse. Instead she ended up texting back and forth to Graham after his first, “How you holding up, kiddo?” message.

When Vanni went to the gym to clear his head, she decided to call Graham. He was, as usual, a calming influence. She was extraordinarily grateful he didn’t use the opportunity to hammer the point home this was the kind of future she could expect with Vanni, whose history came with such complications. Instead he spent most of the call assuring her that until they knew for sure Holly was pregnant there was no need to twist herself in knots trying to figure out how to handle it. All they could really do now was wait.

Only Vanni didn’t have the luxury of waiting. Holly called him when he was in route to the gym. She had panicked over some spotting and wanted to go to the ER, but Julian was off doing day labor and unable to take her. She was beside herself with worry, panicky and in tears, so Vanni flipped the car around and headed straight for Hollywood.

He decided not to tell Andy about his change of plans. She’d try to talk him out of it, which would have been fruitless, then she would have worried the entire time he was gone. It was best not to concern her with it until they knew what was going on – and a hospital visit certainly would confirm a few things for him.