Tessa Ever After (20 page)

“Tell me . . .” he says again. “I want to know what you like. I want to make this so good for you.”

His words and the quiet, lilting cadence of his voice combined with the soft, shallow rocking he’s doing only spirals me closer to the peak, making me teeter on the edge.

“God, I’m gonna come again if you keep this up.” My fingernails dig into his shoulders, and I’m certain I’m leaving marks, but I can’t force myself to care. I’m not even going to examine the part of me that secretly likes that I’m marking him.

He smiles against my neck at my admission. “Good,” he says, then kisses the space just below my ear. “Then you’ll come again when I’m inside you. You’ll come all over me, won’t you, baby?”

Those words and a punctuated thrust of his hips is all it takes, and I’m flying.

Jason’s mouth claims mine, and before I’ve even caught my breath, before the last pulses have washed over me, he slides inside, and I lose my breath all over again.

“Oh
fuuuuck
,” he groans against my lips, his hips resting flush against mine as he clenches his eyes. “Jesus Christ, you feel good.”

And then he starts to move. His thrusts are slow and steady but sure, each pump punctuated with a swivel of his hips. And with each swivel, he presses into my clit, keeping me so worked up I have no doubt in my mind he’ll make good on his promise to make me come again.

Reaching up, he curls his fingers around the back of my head, tangling them in my hair as his thumb brushes against the expanse of my cheek, and I almost can’t look at him. The heat in his eyes, the want and desperate need I see reflecting back at me—the same emotions I know are written all over my face—are overwhelming. Scary as hell, while at the same time it loosens something inside my chest.

His forehead rests on mine, and I can’t help but want to pull him closer. We share breath, never kissing, but our lips never part, either. I grip him around his neck, my other hand digging
into the flesh of his ass, encouraging his thrusts, getting lost in the feel of us together.

In all the times I’ve thought about this with Jason—hell, in all the times I’ve had sex before—I never thought it could be like this.

He finally kisses me, his tongue slipping into my mouth, and I don’t think about anything but the feel of him connecting us completely. He breaks away and presses his lips down my chest to my breasts, sucking a nipple into his mouth. I arch into him, gripping him by his hair to hold him close to me, the movement pressing my clit against him even more.

“
God
,” I breathe, my eyes fluttering closed.

After he’s shown the same attention to my other breast, he pulls away and sits back on his knees, his hands gripping my hips as he stays motionless, seated fully inside me. I’m laid out in front of him, spread wide open and more exposed than I’m comfortable with. But then he looks at me—really
looks
at me—and the hunger in his eyes is unmistakable. His hands are open, his fingers spread out against the expanse of my stomach, his thumbs brushing just above where I need his touch. My head shifts back and forth on the pillow, my hips arching to bring his touch closer to where I want it, and all he does is chuckle.

“Need something?”

I groan, squeezing my eyes shut as I fist the pillow on either side of my head.

“All you have to do is say the words, baby, and I’ll give you whatever you want. Whatever you want . . .” He punctuates that with a thrust of his hips, pulling me onto him.

“Shit, oh God, please,” I say, my words jumbled and probably incoherent.

“You want more of that?” he asks, but he doesn’t expect an
answer, because he gives another thrust, his attention now focused on the place where he’s slipping in and out of me. “Fuck, you look so pretty wrapped around me, taking me all the way in.”

His words only stoke the fire inside, building me up without ever actually giving me the push I need to find completion. He still hasn’t touched me where I need him to, and the urge is too much. Finally I slide my hand down my body and find myself wet with want.

He groans, tipping his head back before he looks at me again. “Christ, you’re trying to kill me.”

The smile doesn’t get far across my face before my mouth opens in a moan as he thrusts harder and faster, bringing me onto him with a renewed urgency. I rub my clit in tighter circles, my face turned into my arm as I concentrate on the feelings he’s wringing from my body.

Keeping up with his thrusts, he leans down, taking a nipple into his mouth, his tongue laving it before he scrapes his teeth against it and then gives a gentle tug.

That’s all it takes and my mouth opens in a gasp, my entire body going taut, and then Jason’s curses are lost among the thrumming heartbeat overwhelming my senses as I fall over, waves rocking through my body.

“Jesus, Tess . . .” And then he’s groaning, gripping me harder as he loses himself, his body bent toward mine, his forehead resting against my neck.

He breathes me in, and I let him, my hands tangled in his hair, trying to regulate my heartbeat again. Trying to make my mind work after he jumbled it all up.

I thought I’d be filled with uncertainty after having sex with Jason. I thought there’d be this giant question mark hanging over
my head as to what came next. Instead, everything about it felt right. Perfect.

And that scares me even more.

jason

If I’d known sex with Tessa was going to be like that, I would’ve stopped being such a pussy about it and fucked her a long time ago. Jesus
Christ
.

I’m not even sure if I can move, especially when Tessa’s fingers are running through my hair and over my back, but I need to take care of the messy part of what was an amazing time. With a kiss on her chest, I pull away and pull out of her, eliciting a groan from us both, and walk to the bathroom to take care of the condom. When I get back in the room, Tessa’s on her side, the sheet pulled up and covering all the good parts of her I intend to study later and in great detail.

I slip in bed behind her, sliding up until her back is pressed to my front, and place a kiss on her shoulder. She hasn’t said anything, hasn’t given me a clue as to how she’s taking this whole thing. I know she had a good time.
Three
good times, so the chemistry between us obviously isn’t an issue. And I tried my hardest to show her exactly how much I wanted her while she gave herself to me.

I also know exactly what kind of history I have and that Tessa hasn’t been ignorant of it, and I feel this overwhelming need to reassure her.

“Hey,” I say against her skin.

“Hmm . . .”

I glance over her shoulder to look down at her face. Her eyes
are closed and a small smile curves her lips, and finally I relax into the bed, letting my head drop to the pillow.

“Okay?” I ask as I wrap my arm around her stomach, tugging her back to me though there’s already no space between us.

She shrugs. “Yeah, just okay.”

I huff out a laugh, reaching my arm around to cup her breast, my thumb swiping over her nipple. My smile only grows when she arches back to me, her ass pressing harder against my cock, which already has grand plans for round two. “If that’s ‘just okay,’ I’m going to have a good fucking time finding out what’s amazing.”

She twists back and looks at me over her shoulder, her eyes flitting between my own, and she’s trying to figure something out, looking for something in my expression; I’m just not sure what.

Not able to take the silence anymore, I lean forward and kiss her, tracing the outline of her lips with my tongue. Soft and sweet and the complete opposite of everything I want to do to her right now . . . everything I want to do to her
again
, but I don’t push.

She smiles against my mouth, then pulls away enough to say, “Keep this up and you just might be able to tonight.”

I groan and drop my head to her shoulder. There’s no way she can’t feel how hard I am against her, and I’ve never had this before. This
want
to please the woman I’m with. To study her, every single inch of her body and find out all her secrets. I want to give Tessa what no one’s given her before. I want to give her what
I’ve
never given anyone before.

Connection without an expiration date.

EIGHTEEN

tessa

The early-morning light streams through my window, waking me from a night of not nearly enough sleep. I stretch, feeling the pull in muscles that haven’t been worked in a very long time, and smile. Jason got his wish to see what I deemed
amazing
. Twice more.

My eyelids flutter open, and Haley stands off to the side of my bed, her face right above mine. “Haley!
God . . .
” I say with a hand to my chest as my heart attempts to recover from the jolt she just gave it. “I told you not to wake me up like that anymore.”

“Sorry, Mama,” she says, but she’s still grinning, the little shit.

She briefly glances over my shoulder before looking at me again, and I freeze, my entire body going still as I remember exactly who she’s seeing. I’ve never had a guy stay the night before. Even when I was seeing David, my last semi-serious
boyfriend, I didn’t invite him to stay. I wanted to keep that part of my life separate from Haley. I didn’t want her feeling uncomfortable in her own home, and I certainly didn’t want to introduce someone into her life who may not be there for the long haul.

None of that even entered my mind with Jason.

Unsure of what to say to Haley, I reach back for Jason. Except instead of finding warm, solid man, my hand encounters cool sheets and an empty bed, and my heart plummets.

Unaware of my thoughts, Haley asks, “Can we have pamcakes for breakfast?”

I answer automatically, my mind going a thousand miles an hour on where Jason is and why he left. “Pancakes,” I correct. “And yeah.”

She hisses out a yes, then takes off out of my room, and I’m left alone with only my thoughts. Which aren’t a great place to be right now.

Maybe he had an early class. Except it’s Sunday.

Maybe he had an appointment he had to get to. Except Jason doesn’t make appointments for anything before noon.

Maybe he had to be at his parents’ place. Except he goes only once a week on Tuesdays, and he’d rather cut off his own balls with a rusty knife than subject himself to more than that.

No matter what I come up with, I can’t think of a plausible excuse for him to have bailed other than the obvious answer I don’t even want to consider. My stomach churns as I get out of bed, throwing on a pair of flannel pajama pants and a tank, zipping a hoodie over it. I’m going to enjoy my day with my daughter, and I’m absolutely not going to think about why Jason would have sex with me three times, hold me in my sleep, and then bail before I wake up.

Haley’s in her bedroom playing with her dolls when I walk past. I poke my head through her doorway. “Blueberry or plain?”

“Chocolate chip!”

“Nice try. You do not need any extra sugar, girl. Blueberry or plain?”

She pouts, but says, “Blueberry, please.”

I smile and head down the hall and toward the kitchen, stopping short when I get to the end of the hallway where it opens to the living room. Because there on the couch, his arms crossed over his chest, face turned toward the cushions at the back, is a sleeping Jason. My heart stops, then leaps, my stomach doing somersaults, because he’s here.

He’s
here.

He didn’t leave like I feared he would. He didn’t run off and escape. He didn’t bail on me and whatever it was we shared last night.

“Jay!” Haley squeals and tears past me, giving him just enough notice to wake up and protect all the important parts as she jumps on him, bouncing against his stomach. “What’re you doin’ here?” she asks, leaning right in his face. “Mama’s makin’ pamcakes. Wanna stay for breakfast?”

He looks past her until his eyes connect with mine, and then he smiles. A smile I’ve never seen on him before. It’s not his confident and sure smile he flashes to everyone. Not his cocky smirk that’s nearly a permanent fixture on his face, the one he flaunts when he’s getting his way.