Authors: Taylor Cole and Justin Whitfield
Chapter Two: Life Cycle of a Male Stripper
When you start out in the biz, you are considered a rookie
for the first year. Being a rookie is not fun. There is a constant flow of
rookies, and probably only one out of every twenty lasts more than two years.
Most don’t make it a couple months. You really have to pay your dues when
trying to break in.
Going up first on the list (which is a horrible spot!) is
one way to pay your dues. Another is to endure the scorn, ridicule and
practical jokes heaped upon you by the veteran dancers and regular clientele.
Each guy who tries to break in has a different experience.
If the veterans think he is an idiot, they will run him out by making it too
uncomfortable for him to keep working there. If the rookie seems to have
potential and is respectful, he doesn’t have to feel the same wrath.
One if the most important steps is to get your acts together
and figure out what exactly your image is. Some guys can be slow and sexy
onstage. Others are high-octane performers who get the crowd pumped. Some have
strong acts and rely heavily on them. Some guys have horrible dance skills but
make up for it with great stage presence. It takes all kinds.
We’ve seen guys go from not hot, to hot, to not hot again.
Every guy peaks at a different stage. If you take care of yourself, it will
usually happen in your late twenties or early thirties. Thirty is probably the
best age for a male stripper because you’re old enough for the older ladies but
still young enough for the young ones, so women of all ages are now tipping
you.
It’s definitely an up-and-down lifestyle. Here are the
stages.
Level 1: Amateur Night
A guy hears about the club and wants to give stripping a
shot. It’s a huge reality check. Very rarely does someone look cool his first
time out. Usually, he’ll do something stupid and the crowd will laugh at him.
The best thing to do early on is as little as possible. Many
a rookie gets caught up trying to impress the crowd or outdo other guys and
will do something he never attempted before, such as a back flip or sliding
across the stage on his knees after taking his pants off. Seeing someone land
on his head or skin his bare knees on the hardwood stage will make women
cringe. It’s totally hilarious though, and the veterans and newly hired rookies
love to watch.
A lot of local fraternities make their pledges compete in
the amateur night as part of their initiation. Not many things are funnier than
watching an eighteen- or nineteen-year-old boy, fresh out of high school,
getting in front of a bunch of girls and stripping.
Level 2: Got the Job, Now What?
Rookies have no idea what to do once they get the job. They
do everything from going onstage with their underwear on backward to making up
a stupid act that humiliates them, such as dressing like a puppy dog and
drinking milk from a bowl or wearing roller skates onstage. That and the
constant pranks the veterans play on rookies make this a very traumatic stage.
Most give it up right there.
When a guy is new, the first thing he does is watch the
other guys and eventually he will find a guy to emulate. “Stealing his moves”
is what we call it. Usually, this is a guy who is similar in looks and build.
It also pisses off the dancer whose moves are stolen because these are usually
his trademark moves such as a spin, a flip or a hip-hop move.
Style is something you learn and hone. A guy never knows
what his style is until he dances for a few weeks. He may want to move slowly
onstage and be sexy, but he might be more of a fast-paced dancer. The different
styles are slow and sexy, cowboy, rocker, hip-hop, GQ’d, dancer, tumbler, “can’t
dance a lick but knows how to strut really well and the girls love him”, and I’m
sure there are a few more.
Most of the time, a veteran will take a rookie under his
wing and help him out, giving him ideas about what type of image to portray, teaching
him some acts and giving him diet and gym tips. In the first year, you are
trying to get your look and image down, from getting the right thong color to
the right costumes and music. This is the time frame where you discover if you
can dance or you learn to dance. Many rookies have two left feet, but a lot of
them can pick it up to a certain level.
If you have no chance of ever picking up rhythm, stage
presence is all you have left, other than a good act. Some acts don’t require
dancing at all. Logging many hours onstage is the
only
way to hone your
skills.
Every guy comes in with a different set of skills. Some can
dance but aren’t good-looking. Some are good-looking but cannot dance. Not
being able to dance is common. All that matters is that you are able to learn. You
can tell some guys have no chance of making it. They don’t have a clue, and
they never last. Other than looks and dancing ability, the mental aspect is
actually a bit more important. It’s hard to feel sexy all the time at work, so
once you have made it and have been working for a bit, the newness has worn off
and it becomes work.
Level 3: Passing the One-Month Mark
Someone has taken you under his wing and gives you a
hand-me-down act and lets you wear his old tear-away pants. You still aren’t
making any money and you don’t think you ever will. But you keep trying, hoping
you will be half as good as those guys who get to work on Saturday night. Some
guys start in the clubs as waiters, so when they start to dance, they already
have some clientele. This is the best way to enter the biz if you are not
already a stud who can dance because it doesn’t take you quite as long to start
making money.
Level 4: Starting to Make Money
After about six months, you start making money, but most of
what you make, you spend on costumes and props. A couple of the regulars start
to tip you and get you through the slow nights, while on the weekends, you
still only go onstage at the very beginning and the very end—or if you are
lucky like Channing Tatum, you become a model/actor and star in
Magic Mike
!
You are starting to find other ways to make money as well: strip-o-grams,
roadshows and maybe even moonlighting in the gay bars.
Level 5: Getting in the Groove
You have two good acts, and you go onstage at good times.
You have a couple of regular customers and start dating hot girls. The veterans
are treating you better and inviting you to go on more roadshows and
strip-o-grams. You love the job and can’t wait to go in every day, especially
Saturday nights because there will be beautiful women giving you money. You’ll
be making lots of it because Saturdays are the money nights, and you know there
will be a party after work with a bunch of hot chicks.
Level 6: Becoming a Stud
Girls come in regularly to give you all their extra cash.
You have a sweet apartment, a wad of money and a fast car. No worries in the
world. People recognize you when you go out and you get the VIP treatment at
all the hot clubs. Trips to Cancun or Las Vegas with hot chicks are the norm.
At this point, you can go onstage and know you will rock the house!
Level 7: Being Top Dog
You go onstage at prime time every night. You’re making more
money than people with college degrees. Girls are paying all your bills and
buying you motorcycles, cars and boats. Every other club has heard about you.
Most guys will never attain this level. The ones who do—well, it’s like a drug.
They want to stay in that moment, to always have those feelings of excitement,
acceptance and self-assurance.
Level 8: Starting to Slide
Everything that goes up must come down. You would think this
would be a better level, but you would be wrong. This is the level where you
start your descent and notice the younger guys catching up. Age is less a
factor here than years of experience. The longer you dance, the higher the burnout
rate. If you retired at the end of level 7, you could consider yourself
retiring in your prime. That’s the best way to go out! Now, at level 8, if you
retire, it’s still okay, you’re just not retiring in your prime.
Dancers who dance more than about ten years have to reinvent
themselves. Sometimes you don’t have to change your look that dramatically, but
a change of act will usually help refresh the dancer’s attitude and help him
make more money.
Level 9: Over the Hill
If you are still working and have arrived at this level, it’s
not a good thing! You should’ve retired by now and moved to Level 10, but there
are always some guys who just won’t quit. Due to your lengthy career in
stripping, you find that you don’t have a lot of other job skills and it’s hard
to find another job making as much money for as little work as you do
stripping. Hanging out with the old club regulars who remember you from your
heyday is how you pay your bills now. You justify it in your head, telling
yourself that they are your “friends” or she is a “really nice person”, but
deep down you know you have made some bad choices in life. You may get a side
job for some extra cash doing something you hate. You tell everyone how good
you were as a male dancer for twenty-five years. No one really believes you and
they think you’re weird, so they find a way to get rid of you. You go back to
the club where your stuff is still in your locker, and you give dancing another
shot.
Level 10: Life after Dancing
If you were smart and saved your acorns during the summer,
you will have a nice winter. However, if you partied too hard and totally
bummed out your whole career, you’re in trouble!
The smart guys start businesses with the money they made,
and life is good for them. They comprise about five percent of male dancers.
It’s sad, but about seventy-five percent of older strippers
are not in great financial shape and are living month to month. The rest either
married a rich girl or just adapted to the real world, finished their degrees
and found success.
Justin
Whitfield
Taylor
Cole
Chapter
Three: Backstage with the Guys
The guys we work with are, for the most part, some of the
coolest people on earth, and they come from a huge diversity of backgrounds and
a wide range of nationalities. We worked with guys who came to the United States
from all over the world, including Canada, Puerto Rico, Cuba, Venezuela,
Russia, New Zealand, Iran, Vietnam, China, the Philippines, Nicaragua, Germany,
Mexico and Africa.
One of the reasons for the diversity of club dancers is that
the club owner hires any guy who can make him money. In other words, you can
get a job stripping in a club even if all you have is potential. We have worked
with guys as young as high school age to one guy in his eighties. Disco Frankie
was known as the world’s oldest male stripper and he was dancing at shows almost
until his death. We’ve worked with dancers as short as five-feet-two and as
tall as six-feet-eight, weighing from one hundred and twenty pounds to more
than three hundred pounds. From insecure to overly confident, from monogamous
to pure slut, dumb to smart, we have worked with all types. The only common
factor among them was the desire. You have to want to be a male stripper in
order to be successful. If you don’t want it, you will not make money.
The Gay Question
The most common question we get asked by far is whether we
are gay. In all our years, we’ve never worked with a single gay dancer, at
least not that we know of. It doesn’t make sense for a gay guy to work at a
club that caters to women when he could easily work at a gay bar and make a lot
more money—as well as have more fun.
Think about it. Men have a higher disposable income than
women and spend way more money in the sex business. A gay guy would bank at a
gay bar but not at a straight bar. So why would he settle for less money? You
can see why a straight man would do it—because we get off on all that female
attention. In fact, some straight men would probably do it for free!
Jealousy and Fights
Jealousy is not very common. The guys are all about
themselves when it comes to making money, but there is a silence code. This
silence code is what keeps the guys from talking trash about one another at the
club. Most dancers are respectful and try to support one another by helping each
other out with group acts. The dancers who stray from the silence code or who
stir up trouble eventually get pushed out or kicked out.
With so much testosterone in the building, you would imagine
that there would be lots of fights at male dance clubs. Over the years, we had
probably two to three fights per year. These happen for many different reasons.
Most arguments end with yelling, but a few come to blows. Alcohol is usually
involved. Sometimes a prank gone bad or someone getting sick of the hazing will
spark tempers. Many times, a new guy will come in, and his insecurities or lack
of social skills will make him try to establish dominance. This is a very bad
idea nine out of ten times.
Many people get the impression dancers are sissies or timid.
This is typically a myth. Many of the guys practice boxing, MMA (Mixed Martial
Arts), jiu jitsu and other full-contact sports. Some are even professional
fighters. The aggressive new guy will learn a hard lesson very fast if he gets
out of line.
Almost every club has an enforcer. This is the guy whom the
other guys look to handle dancers getting out of control. The funny thing is
these are generally the nicest guys who don’t like to fight, but because they
may have a skill or strength, they usually have to check someone who is not
being part of the team.
Stripper Dads
Most of our friends who are dancers and have kids are
upfront with their kids about their work. However, one friend managed to keep
it a secret from his son until he was fifteen. This friend was taking a call
for a strip-o-gram and had to pull up the website for the club he danced at.
When his son sat down in front of the computer and saw a picture of his
shirtless dad advertising a male strip club, his jaw dropped and he was
speechless. The friend knew he could no longer hide his secret and so he came
clean.
Oddly, when we ask guys with sons if they would let them
become dancers, nine out of ten say they would prefer that their sons not
dance. They say they don’t hate the job, but they all want what’s best for
their kids. Which leaves the question, “If the life and job are so great, why
not?” The main reason they give is that they do it so their kids won’t have to.
There is the one out of ten dancers who is different. We’ve seen those dads
encourage their sons to learn how to dance and sing. These are usually the dads
who want to be famous.
Types of Strippers
Strippers come in all sizes, shapes, colors and
temperaments. But there are some classic archetypes each club seems to have at
one time or another. Here are a few.
The Horny-All-the-Time Guy
: Ever hear the story of
the rooster and the farmer? Well, there’s this rooster on the farm that keeps screwing
the animals to death. One day, the farmer is in the fields and hears a loud, “Mooo!”
The farmer runs to the cow and sees the rooster on top screwing the cow. The
farmer says, “Damn rooster! You’re gonna screw yourself to death!” Next day,
same thing, except the rooster is screwing the dog. Then the cat. The farmer
finds himself repeating the same warning over and over, “Damn rooster! You’re
gonna screw yourself to death!” One day the farmer is on his way to the barn
when he sees the rooster lying on its back, not moving and its tongue hanging
out. Farmer says, “I told you, you damn rooster! You were gonna screw yourself
to death!”
Just then, the rooster opens one eye, looks at the farmer
and says, “Shhhhhhhh! Buzzard!” The horny-all-the-time guy is much like the
rooster in this joke. He will sleep with any woman who will have him. He just
loves women! He will go from hottie to nottie. You have your drug addicts, and
his drug is sex.
Big Cowboy
: Ever heard of the stereotype if he has
big hands, he has a big penis? Well, this guy would disprove all of those
rumors. He was a boxer with huge hands. He would walk up to a new guy and
demand to see his cock. When the guy would refuse, he’d ask again but meaner.
Then he would say, “Your cock is teeeeeeeenie!” The funny part was that he had
the smallest penis in the dressing room. How did I know? He would pull it out
to show that he didn’t care. I swear he was on a mission to find a penis
smaller than his. The amazing thing was that he got more tail than anyone there
at the time. That was just one big cowboy, though. Usually, the cowboy is one
of the top dogs on stage and a gentle giant…unless you piss him off!
Emotional Guy
: Girlfriend problems make his tear
ducts fill up. Or maybe he is upset by some rude remark a girl made. Maybe it’s
just that time of month for him. You know, time to cleanse the system and have a
good cry. Some guys really do have frequent breakdowns in the dressing room,
and they will bawl like a five-year-old, even threatening suicide. It’s always
an attention ploy because out of all the deaths we saw, none was a suicide. It
becomes very annoying listening to his problems and whining. However, he is
usually able to use this as a money maker. “Oh I love him because he’s so
sensitive!” is what the girls will say.
Druggies
: They come and go often, live a gypsy
lifestyle and are usually about five to ten years past their prime, with a past
that is longer than their future. These guys are often the ones who were
naturally gifted with beauty and used that fact to skate through life.
Smart Ones
: These guys have college degrees and ways
of making money other than dancing. They know that dancing for extra cash and
not for their careers is the best way to stay ahead. These guys have various
businesses now and have become successful, often earning six-figure incomes and
being their own boss.
I
’m-Too-Sexy-to-Work-Out Guy
: This guy usually
is too full of himself. Probably started dancing at a young age and his career
took off with a bang. He didn’t have to work out to look good or work too hard
to get attention, so he never developed good habits. Now that he is in his
early thirties, he is out of shape but thinks he can still do it without
working out. He can’t figure out why he doesn’t make as much money as he used
to.
The Nice and Innocent Guy
: Yes, he does exist.
Everyone likes him and he is always in a relationship.
Overly Confident, Cheesy Pick-up Line Guy
: For some
reason, it actually works, though. Why do women fall for his cheesy crap?
Mr. Money Balls
: Some guys actually will bring dollar
bills to work and put them in their money roll to make it seem as if they are
making a killing. One guy had us fooled for years into thinking he was making a
lot. After a night he went onstage and there wasn’t one girl in the club, we
realized it was an illusion, as he walked offstage with a huge wad of dollar
bills in his underwear. The other dancers quickly called him out about it.
Hustler
: He’s a smooth talker and he doesn’t take no
for an answer. He can talk an Eskimo into buying ice cubes. The hustler is a
cutthroat dancer and he would sell his own mother to make a quick buck. He may
seem cool at first, but his true colors always shine through and then he is
shunned by the dancers and eventually run off. We’ve seen many of these guys
come and go. It takes awhile to spot them at first. They made it through their
whole lives scamming people and/or making them feel sorry for them to get what
they want. These guys are a cancer in the club and cause more drama than they
are worth. They will do for a dollar what you wouldn’t do for a thousand, and
that makes it hard for the quality dancers to compete. They also tell the other
dancers’ business to customers, pretending to be a friend, and sometimes lying
to steal them away. Then they will have sex with them to seal the deal. They
get paid a fraction of what the other guy got and do all the things the other
guy wouldn’t.
Visitors
: These are guys who travel from club to club
across the United States. If one club is doing better, they visit that club.
They bring new excitement with them, but the guys who call the club home might
not be happy to have the competition. Most are really cool and respectful, they
get along with the guys, and the locals appreciate their shows. It’s almost
like a family reunion when they come. Usually, dancers throw after-parties
while they are in town to show them a good time.
Every once in a while, however, a hustler will blow through,
and we hate that. One of the worst was a cocky guy from the East Coast who
thought he was a real stud. We thought he sucked, but the owner gave him
special treatment because he was from out of town. The local guys hated him but
the owner shrugged off their attempts to get him to scold the guy. It wasn’t
until we caught him on camera stealing money out of all the other dancers’
lockers that the boss said he should go home. He was even stealing from the guys
who were sticking up for him.
Wanna-be Famous Guy
: Every other dancer is trying to
be a model or actor. Some have been in print commercials and film, though
usually just as extras on the set. These guys tend to float from club to club
and perform roadshows a lot.
The Hung One
: This guy is famous for his big cock.
This is the only guy who doesn’t have to worry about the other guys trying to
screw any of his exes.
Whipping Boy
: This guy always gets into a
relationship with the wrong girl, usually a stripper who totally dominates the
relationship. She sleeps around and he convinces himself that she is really a
good girl. Guys at a club are known to sleep with each other’s girlfriends. It’s
an alpha male thing. Fights will break out over this. Fights about this are not
common, but we’ve seen it happen more than once. A dancer was caught in the
parking lot fucking a rookie’s fiancée in a car. The rookie knocked on the
window and the dancer said, “Dude, get the fuck out of here! I’m not done!” The
dancer was huge and definitely the alpha male over the rookie! The girl didn’t
stop either.
Guy Who Sucks and Doesn’t Know It
: We all try to give
some advice to him, but he thinks he knows better, even though he bombs onstage
every time he goes up. This guy usually has an outdated look or outdated act
and costumes.
Power Trip Guy
:He
has some type of gig (roadshow, modeling gig, tour) where he is the boss and
picks out dancers to go on the shows. He yells and screams, and the guys put up
with him because they need and want the extra work.
Guy Who Girls Think is Gay but Who is Really Straight
:
The way he talks is a little bit feminine, and the girls think might be gay,
but in reality he has a hot girlfriend or he gets a lot of girls.
Too Damn Old to be Stripping Guy
: There is a type of
man who will dance until he can dance no more. In his mid-fifties or older, he has
evolved into a swap meet on stage. In order to get the girls up to the stage,
he gives out posters, key chains, thongs, feathers, pictures, plastic flags and
cowboy hats—pretty much anything you can find at a dollar store. One of these
guys was once our boss and he ruled with an iron fist. Seriously, the dude was
whack, but the money was so good that the guys put up with his shit.
Even though he totally bombs onstage every night and is
laughed at, he still tries to convince everyone he is the best. He even gives
girls his own money and tells them to give it back to him onstage so it looks as
if the crowd likes him. Karma has definitely gotten the best of this guy. He
used to date hot, hot girls but now is a mere joke. He is the perfect example
of why you have to have a Plan B. Looks fade.