Strapped: A Second Chance Mafia Romance (2 page)

1
4th March 2010

A
t seventeen years old
, I live with my grandmother in her tiny, two-bedroom dump of an apartment. I don't like the house very much, but I adore my grandma. After my dad died of a drug overdose when I was only eight, and my mom ran off with some other junkie that she’d been hooking up with the entire time, my grandmother was my shining beacon of sanity. The one who kept me going. I have my cousin Johnny too, but she feels like my true family. The only one that I can turn to when things get tough.

Well... that was the case until Olivia came into my life.

I might be a bad kid from the wrong side of the tracks, and that might be the only thing that most people know about me, but she sees something else. She sees something more within me, and that makes me want to be a better person too. She’s a year younger than me in school, but I noticed her the day that she stepped foot onto the grounds. She might be the smart kid who makes the best effort that she can to simply blend into the background, but I could instantly see through all of that.

Just like me, she isn’t what she appears to be – she’s so much more.

To be perfectly honest, I’m really surprised that I’m the only one to notice her. She might not be the typical big-boobed teenage fantasy that most boys are after, but she’s utterly gorgeous. She has light, floaty hair and the most amazing blue eyes that I’ve ever looked at. I could get lost in them for hours on end. She might be smart and studious, focused on carving out a good future for herself rather than worrying about what some other girl wore to the mall the other day, but she is so much fun when you get to know her. She’s clever, witty, and incredibly sweet. She also has a rocking body that’s to die for under all of those layers of clothing – made even better by the fact she doesn’t let just anyone see it.

“You coming out?” My friend Spencer calls across the soccer field before we all head off to the changing rooms to get back into our normal clothes. “It’s gonna be wicked tonight, Jack’s brother bought him some vodka so we’re all gonna get wasted...”

In the past, that idea would have been amazing to me. I would have been right on it, excited to get hammered with my friends and do some stupid shit, but I’m not that way inclined anymore. Olivia has made me see that there is so much more to life than that. Without even pressuring me to, she has helped me to realize that if I just apply myself a bit I can get myself out of this hole and make myself have a positive future – the sort that no one will expect.

That’s the best part of having a positive future to look forward to – proving everyone wrong.

“Nah, I can’t,” I tell my friend regrettably. “Sorry.”

“He’s all wifed up now, remember,” someone else teases. “He can’t do anything without his missus in tow.”

“Shut up,” I shoot back, instantly getting riled up by the boys talking about Olivia. I know they mean well, and that it’s only banter, but it still gets to me. She’s too precious to be talked about by them, in any kind of way.

Actually, she’s too good for me too, but I try not to think too hard about that part.

“I’ll see you losers later.” I storm off to get ready, preferring the company of Olivia now to everyone else.

As soon as I see her outside waiting for me, looking ethereal, my heart skips a beat and I can’t help but smile to myself. The fact that this girl can see past everything that we are, and she’s giving me a chance anyway, is amazing to me – she couldn't be more opposite of me if she tried. A good girl, from a nice family and a nice home. We shouldn’t be together, it’s almost unbelievable that we are... but I’m so crazily happy that we are.

“Hey, beautiful,” I grab her around the waist and spin her towards me. “How are you?” Before she can answer, I crash my lips into hers, loving the butterflies that instantly start swimming through my stomach. No one has ever made me feel this way before, and despite what I’m sure people think, I know it’s more than just puppy love.

I love her, wholeheartedly, with all of my being, and I intend to be with her forever, doing whatever it takes to make her happy.

“I’m good,” she finally gasps as we pull apart. “I’ve missed you today!”

“Me too. I hate how long the days are without you by my side.” I hold her hand lightly between my fingers and stare deeply into her eyes. “Hey, are you busy tonight? Do you have time to hang out?”

“I’m sorry, I really have to study,” she replies sadly. “I have a big test tomorrow.” I know when she says this that she really means it. Some girls say stupid shit like that to be a prick tease, to act like they give a shit about something other than themselves, but not Olivia. She really wants to study, and she always says exactly what she means – it’s refreshing to be with someone so honest.

“Okay, well, let me walk you home then,” I smile, ignoring the sinking feeling inside. I’m lucky that Olivia even looks my way – if the girl needs to study then I have to let her do that. “Then you can tell me all about your day.”

I love the way that she talks about her classes first and her friends second. It makes me actually really want to listen to everything she has to say. I make agreeable noises every now and again, but I don't really want to interrupt her when she’s in full flow. I know that this is the most that she’s said all day, and I’m so utterly grateful that she feels comfortable enough around me to open up – it means that I’m special.

As we get to the corner where she lives, we turn to say goodbye to one another. We haven’t had any active protests from her parents just yet, but we don't flaunt our relationship in front of them just in case. Olivia’s grades haven’t slipped at all since she’s met me, but I don't want them to have any reason to dislike me anyway.

“I’m gonna miss you so much,” she pouts in a sweet way, which makes me chuckle.

“You’re so adorable,” I tell her, kissing the top of her head. “What am I supposed to do all night without you now?”

She doesn’t answer me, instead she places a sweet kiss on my lips instead, causing my heart to flutter. I pull her in closer to me, wanting to commit the sensation of her body pressed up against mine to memory. I know that it’ll get me through the night until I can see her again to walk her to school.

“I love you,” I whisper into her ear. “I always have and I always will.”

“I love you too,” she replies, and in that moment I truly think that we’re going to make it.

* * *

1
8
^th
September 2014

T
here it is
. That heart fluttering again – a sensation that I haven’t experienced in a very long time. In fact, the last time I felt this way, was the last time I was with her. The memory of that awful day threatens to spill into my mind, but I quickly push it aside, locking it into that box where it has been living for the last few years.

I expected that day to be the last time I ever laid eyes upon Olivia Markson, and so far I’ve been proven right. She vanished from my life without a trace, and that’s just how it’s been. Until now.

I didn’t even really want to come to Jesters tonight – it might have been a cool place once upon a time, but recently it’s only been frequented by alcoholics and wannabe bikers. I only came in here because I’m on a mission to find someone. And it looks like I’ve found someone, only it isn’t the person that I came in here for.

Thump, thump.

Thump, thump.

Thump, thump.

As my heart pounds noisily in my chest, and the rest of the world melts away, I find myself faced with a difficult decision. Do I reconnect with the woman who meant so much to me way back when, or do I act like I have no idea who she is, ensuring that our lives can never become intertwined again?

“Marco?” She gasps, making my decision for me. “Marco Fabbri, is that really you?” She starts moving through the crowd, reaching out for me, causing the anxiety to really start making its way through me.

It messes with my head that a woman can have such an effect on me. I’m used to manipulating any sexy woman that crosses my path, making sure that they clamber into my bed and onto my cock, but for some reason, seeing Olivia again has me reduced to jelly. It’s as if I’ve been sent back a few years, and I’m that crazy, insecure teenager all over again.

“Oh my God, it
is
you!” She exclaims, throwing her arms around me as if the past few years haven’t happened. “How are you?”

“Yeah... I’m fine,” I stammer slightly, allowing my eyes to flicker all over her body. She’s still absolutely stunning, and hot as hell too. She’s grown up a lot, that much is undeniable, but the woman that she’s become is phenomenal. I want her badly, my attraction to her instantly heats up my entire body, and that’s made so much worse by the fact that she’s making physical contact with me. “It’s good to see you... shall we sit down and have a drink?”

With the table between us, and a beer clasped between my fingers, I feel a little more back to my overly confident self. The shock of seeing Olivia again has passed now, and with more time to think straight, I find it much easier to converse like a normal person.

“So... how have you been?” I ask, smiling brightly. “It’s been a long time.”

“A very long time,” she sighs wistfully. “So much has happened. I don't even know where to begin. After school, I got my degree...” As she goes on to tell me about the path that her life has taken – the one that I expected of her – I focus on her lips more than her words. I hear what she’s saying of course – especially when she mentions some fancy job at some advertising agency in the city because it means that she’ll be sticking around – but I’m too sucked in by her beauty to see anything else. “What about you?” She suddenly asks, which causes my heart to start pounding like crazy. I don't like where this is going – I don't like what I have to tell her, so I’m eternally grateful when my phone starts to ring,

Ring, ring. Ring, ring.

“Oh sorry,” I tell her regretfully. “I just have to get this.”

I spin my back to her and pick up, being dragged unwittingly back into my real life.

“Did you find him?” Carmine, the man who is effectively my boss asks. “Did you find the scumbag?”

“Nope,” I shoot back quickly, popping the P. “I don't think he came this way.”

“Umberto is getting really pissed off about this one,” he tells me honestly. He sounds afraid, and I know why. Umberto Carbone is his boss, and although I’ve never met him directly, word on the street is that he’s a hard-ass that takes no prisoners. “You need to get it done.”

My heart sinks as I realize that I need to cut my reunion with Olivia short. As I glance at her out of the corner of my eye, it hits me that I can’t let her go so easily again. Not this time.

“I’m on my way.”

I click my phone shut, and turn back to look her in the face once more. “I’m really sorry, but I have to go.” I hold up my phone to indicate that its business tearing me away from her. “But this has been good – maybe we should meet up again soon. What’s your number?”

She reads out her digits to me, with a smile playing on her lips, which makes it very difficult for me to leave. I have to really force myself to stand up and walk back out of that hellhole bar, leaving her in there at the hands of those drunken idiots. My head knows that I have to – I haven’t been back in her life long enough to start taking care of her... plus I have this job to get to, but my heart is desperate for me to get back to her.

Soon enough,
I promise myself.
Soon enough.

1
9th September 2010

T
hings have been
different over the last few months. Actually, it isn’t ‘things’ that have been different, it’s Marco. When I first met him, he had a real bad attitude about him, one that hated everyone and everything, but slowly over time, as our friendship developed into something more, his heart started to open and the rest of the world got a glimpse of the good guy that I knew he was deep down.

Even my best friend Marissa – who has done nothing but disapprove of us – started to unfreeze her heart towards him and see something else.

But recently it feels like his friends are pulling him away from me and into something dangerous. I have heard bad things about his group – booze, drugs, crime, the lot – and I’m terrified that Marco will be brought into all of that too. I’m scared that he will throw away his life over something ridiculous. I know that his older cousin Johnny is the center of all things bad, which is the worst thing of all. The pull of family will overshadow me in the end, I’m sure of it.

“Come back to my place?” He asks as he meets me at the corner near my home for our Saturday together. I’m supposed to be working at my part-time job, but I took the day off to spend some time with him alone. I want to remind Marco of what we mean to one another, and how good things can be between us.

I nod enthusiastically, grateful for his idea because if we’re in his home, we can’t run into his group and get dragged into something stupid. A lot of our dates have been ruined recently by his friends crashing, and I just don't want that to happen today.

“Sounds good.”

He wraps his arms around me, pulling me in close as we walk, and I fall happily into his embrace. When we’re like this, he makes me feel safe and secure – happier than I’ve ever been before, and I pray that we will always be this way.

But as we walk into his grandmother’s home, my heart sinks. At first, I think the guys sitting in Marco’s front room are his gang of friends, but I quickly realize that they’re older, and not people I know at all. Johnny is sitting in the middle of them all, and he’s the only face that I recognize.

“Hi,” Marco calls out happily, as if they don't intimidate him at all, but as they all look up, my fear level intensifies and I find myself hiding behind his frame. Luckily Marco towers above me, so he practically covers me completely. “You guys okay?”

For one horrifying second, I think that Marco is going to make us sit with them – a situation that I wouldn’t be comfortable with. There’s something seriously scary about these guys, they seem to scream danger, and they have every one of my alerts on edge. But then, just as excuses to leave start running through my mind, Marco tugs on my hand and takes me to his bedroom.

“Who... who are they?” I stammer, fearing the answer.

“Just some guys my cousin knows,” he replies evasively. “They have some business stuff going on... it’s nothing to worry about,” he quickly continues, almost as if he can sense my worry.

“Right...” I drawl, not totally convinced.

He sits down on the bed and pats it, indicating that I should sit beside him, which I do because I want to be as close to him as possible. I hate the feeling of being unsafe, and I can’t stand it inside Marco’s home – it feels wrong. I know that his house isn’t the best, and is in a bad area, but I’ve never had this cold, prickly sensation before, and I really don't like it.

He pulls me in for a kiss, and as our lips meld together, I really try to lose myself within the moment, but I’m distracted – acutely aware of what’s going on, on the other side of that door.

“Are you okay?” Marco pulls back to ask.

I nod, but my eyes betray me by glancing back over towards the door. Instead of getting mad, Marco walks over there and clicks the lock shut which allows me to let out a breath I hadn’t even realized I was holding. As he spins back around, I notice a familiar glint in his eyes, and with the door locked, we both know that there’s no holding back.

Marco is aware that I don't feel ready for sex yet, and he respects that massively, but we have fooled around a lot and things keep getting that little further each and every time. As he walks my way, displaying that confident swagger that I love so much, my heart pounds with excitement. I know that I should tell him to hold off while there are so many people in the house, but I don't. In fact, in a weird way it kind of adds to the illicit thrill.

“Better?” He rasps and I nod slowly.

Marco presses his lips up against me once more as his fingers trail down my body. He slowly pushes me back into a lying position in the bed, and I comply happily, allowing him to have total control over my body. I already know that I can trust him with my life, and I still feel that way despite whatever has been going on with him, so I’m more than happy for him to claim me. It makes me feel feminine and dainty, like a princess that needs to be saved.

His hands travel slowly and seductively over my breasts, pausing only to tug on my nipples a little bit which causes me to arch my back against him. He already has so many sensations running through my body that the rest of the world simply melts away. Any strange behaviour, any unwelcome men, they all just vanish as I lose myself in the love of my life.

My summer dress starts to hitch up around my waist, and although this isn’t the first time he’s delved into my panties to drive me wild with his fingers, this time I feel even more exposed than normal. Maybe it’s the cold shiver that has just run down my spine, or maybe it’s the hungry look that’s consuming Marco’s eyes. As his fingers trace patterns over my thighs I have this sense that he’s about to take things to another level, that he’s about to put me through something that I’ve never experienced before, which excites and terrifies me in equal measures.

“You’re so beautiful,” he tells me, staring deep into my eyes as he pulls my underwear to one side. “I’m so lucky to have you.”

I want to tell him that I feel the same way about him, and that it’s actually me that’s the lucky one, but his fingers have started to explore me, and I’m struggling to breathe, never mind speak.

All of a sudden, his fingers move away which causes me to lean up onto my elbows to get a look at what he’s doing, wondering why he’s abandoned me at such a key time. But then I see him moving his lips towards me and I slump back in shock.

He isn’t going to... is he? That isn’t something we’ve ever done before, but it’s certainly something that I’ve thought about a lot.

His mouth is so close now that I can feel his breath on my entrance, which is sending me dizzy with desire. I pant heavily and grip onto the sheets beneath me, feeling myself going crazy. All the sensations floating around me are almost too much, almost too intense, I could almost scream out with it...

And then his tongue plunges into me, and everything that I’ve been keeping bottled inside bursts free.

“Oh God,” I cry, not even caring that there are people probably listening in right now. “Oh Marco, this feels...” but I can’t quite find the words. There isn’t any way to describe how amazing this is, so I simply allow my head to loll back in ecstasy instead.

He begins alternating his tongue between my entrance and my clit, causing me to recoil and buckle under his touch. This is something else!

An intense pressure starts to build within me, so I pull the pillow out from behind my head to give me something to bite on. I just need something to center me, to connect me to the Earth.

Then it happens. The orgasm shatters through my body, and I scream into the pillow, allowing my body to shudder freely. No one else has ever made me feel so good, and no one else ever will.

Marco is the one for me, and that’s all there is to it.

* * *

2
4
^th
September 2014

M
y first week
of work has passed in a haze. It’s been good, but to be honest I’ve been really distracted. Seeing Marco in Jesters over the weekend really threw me, and it’s shaken up absolutely everything. Of course I knew that there was a chance he would still be in New York, but it’s such a massive city – I never expected to actually see him.

The only problem is he hasn’t contacted me. He has had my phone number for all those days, and he hasn’t been in touch. I’ve been checking my phone obsessively, but there’s still nothing there...

Ring, ring.

Almost as if I’ve summoned him through my desperation, my phone lights up with a strange number that I’m almost convinced must be him.

“He... hello?” I ask anxiously.

“Hi there, Olivia,” his warm voice courses through me, sending butterflies bursting through my stomach. “Would you like to meet up for a drink tonight?” He gets straight to the point in a way that I actually really like. There are no games, no messing about, it’s just simple... like it was in the early days of ‘us’.

I gulp down that memory and reply. “Yes, that would be lovely.”

“Somewhere a little nicer than Jesters though,” he laughs and I try my best to join in, but I’m too nervous to really find this funny. “How about Birds? It’s the gastro pub place on the corner...”

“I know where it is,” I tell him – only because I’ve been passing it every day on my way to work. “That sounds lovely.”

“Eight?” He asks, and I quickly agree.

As I hang up the phone, I find my body pulsating with a need for him. Even after all this time I still seem to react for him so strongly. I still seem to want him, even though I know he isn’t good for me. He’s just so gorgeous and I still know that there’s a good man there deep down under all of his bravado. There always has been, and I know for a fact that no matter what’s been going on in his life, that good guy is there somewhere – however deep he has buried him.

I might want him, but I can’t have him. I need to bear that in mind for my own sanity.

He’s always held a big piece of my heart, and to be honest as my first love he probably always will. I just need to go out to meet him as a friend, with my head screwed on. I’m older now, more sensible, more mature. I have more life experience that I can bring with me. I’m not the little girl that I once was, desperate for his love. I’m a grown woman with my own apartment and my own career. I have a life that’s mine now, not mine and his, and it’ll be best for the both of us if it remains that way.

I can do this.

I can go and meet Marco, keeping my heart intact.

I can... can’t I?