Authors: Joyce Wright
Dinner. The longer Clara waited, the harder it got. She had mentioned it to Edith when she returned from the picnic, and from then on it was all her parents talked about. So, for the four days she had to wait, it was agony.
Four days was enough time for Clara to sort out her head. She came to two conclusions; one, that she greatly enjoyed the Duke’s company and was interested in courting him; and two, that she was going to have to say something about Jessie.
She allowed one of the maids to help her dress - a beautiful red dress with long sleeves and a pinkish pattern along the skirt. She hissed in a breath as the corset was pulled tight, relaxing once the strings were adjusted.
“There you are miss. Your family is waiting for you downstairs. The Duke of Somerset will be here soon, I believe.”
“Thank you Anne.”
“Do you want me to do your hair, miss?”
“I shall do it myself. You may leave.”
Clara twisted up her hair as the maid left - a high bun secured with a glittering diamond hair piece.
A moment later the maid knocked on the door again. “Excuse me, miss. Ma’am wants you downstairs.”
Oh, her mother was so impatient! With a sigh, she headed downstairs, heels clicking against the tile floor.
The dining room was a long rectangular room with a fire at one side and a door to the kitchen on the other. A huge wooden table sat in the center, long enough to seat twelve people or more. Like the rest of the house, it was decorated in pale creams and browns.
Almost as soon as Clara entered, she was met by a grinning Ruby. The chubby woman snatched her up in a strong embrace, laughing. “Sister! My, it feels like such a long time since we last saw each other.”
“I have missed you Ruby. May I ask, where is your husband?”
Her smiled faded, but she simply shrugged. “He could not make it - urgent business, you know how it is.”
Clara nodded and stepped out of the embrace. No sooner did she do so when Pauline took up her sister’s place, scooping Clara up with ease. “Hello little sister. You have found a man at last - a Duke, too! Wonderful!”
A steady knock on the front door alerted Clara to Oscar’s arrival. Her two older sisters squealed in delight and took their seats at the table, gossiping quietly. Pauline’s husband took his seat beside her, joining in on the discussion.
When Oscar appeared in her line of vision, Clara all but melted. He looked so handsome and regal, dressed in a dark red suit that almost seemed to match her dress. He smiled as he saw her, quickly making his way over to kiss her hand.
“Miss Clara. How wonderful to see you again.”
“Please, you have allowed me to call you Oscar - you must drop the miss. Just ‘Clara’ is fine.”
He nodded and straightened up.
“Now, you must meet my family. My mother Edith, you have already met.”
Edith performed a small curtsy, beaming at Oscar.
“My father Samuel.”
“Just Sam is fine.”
Clara smiled as she turned to her sisters. “my elder sister Pauline Denver and her husband, Adam. Her twin Ruby.”
“I apologize that my husband could not be here, too.” Ruby apologized as both she and Pauline dipped into a curtsy.
“And lastly, my youngest Jessie.” Her voice hitched as she said the name, though she cleared her throat, hoping to gloss over it.
“Lovely to meet you, Duke.” Jessie smiled broadly, as if smiling at the most beautiful thing she had ever seen.
“And you. It is good to meet all of you, and thank you for being my hosts.”
Everyone settled into their seats, Clara and Oscar placed opposite each other. She watched him levelly as she sat back, smiling absently. The only problem was his closeness to Jessie - they sat right beside each other.
The servants brought out the first course and everything passed effortlessly. They chatted about idle things - town gossip, the meal, nothing of importance. It felt oddly natural - as if they had been doing this for
years.
In those short moments, it truly felt as if Oscar was already her husband.
It was not until the main course was served that their marriage was brought to surface.
“So,” Edith began, and immediately Clara knew what was to come, “I had expected marriage arrangements to be put in place before now. Things are not progressing quite as I had expected.”
Oscar and Clara shared a look. She dipped her head a second later, biting her lip. Underneath the table, her hands clenched around the fabric of her dress. “I know, mother,” she replied with a wince, “we have both decided that it is best to get to know each other first.”
“Why is that? You can do so while living married life.”
“Edith, I do not think this is the thing t discuss over dinner,” Sam started - but he seemed to see his wife was not one for listening.
“I am simply stating that the sooner you marry, the better. My daughters can support this, can you not?”
Pauline sighed and nodded. “For us, yes. Not for Clara.”
Pursing her lips, Edith shook her head. “I just think you are being too cautious - both of you.
“If it is not too bold to say, rushing into marriage will not do us good,” Oscar spoke, setting down his fork, “we do not know each other well at all.”
“There is also another reason I think it is a bad idea,” Clara blurted, “Oscar, may I speak to you a moment? Alone.” She simply could
not
keep this up any more. She had to say something now.
Casting Clara a confused glance, Oscar got to his feet. “Of course. Please excuse us for a moment.”
Clara followed him into the hall, softly closing the door behind her. “I apologize for interrupting our meal, but there is something I need to say. I do not think I could say it in front of my family.” In the back of her mind, Clara knew this was not the time to have this conversation. Her parents were barely a few feet away, expecting them back in only a few minutes. Despite this, she continued speaking. “I know how you feel about my sister Jessie. I do not think it a good idea to continue this when you wish to focus your affections on someone else.”
Oscar stood for a long moment, eyes wide as a saucer. He opened his mouth as if to speak, then closed it again.
“Please say something.
Anything.
I know I should not have said this here, but I needed to.” Clara bit down on her lip, feeling the sharp pain on the inside of her mouth. She ignored it.
“I do not know
what
to say, Clara. Do you really wish to call all of this off? If so, you need only say, not make up-”
“I am not making this up,” she hissed, wincing as she heard movement inside the dining room. She had to keep her voice low so her family did not hear. “That day at the picnic, you kept asking about her, bringing her up. Why else would you?” She folded her arms over her chest, looking up at him with watery eyes.
She should not be so emotional about all of this - less than a month ago she did not even want to meet him. How different things were now that she had actually met him.
Some small part of her brain kept trying to tell her she was being unreasonable. She must give the man a chance to speak, to explain himself - but the bigger part of her, the part that was in charge, did not want to listen to his excuses. If he was trying to keep her sweet, she was not going to allow it.
“I am not angry, Oscar - not really. I would just prefer, if you have feelings for Jessie, to be truthful with me. I do not wish to be made a fool of, especially with almost my entire family in the next room.” Clara pursed her lips, gazing at him for only a second before dropping her eyes to the floor. Although her voice sounded strong and sure, her posture gave away her true feelings. Back hunched, arms crossed, it was clear she was uncomfortable. Who could blame her?
“Clara, I have no interest in Jessie. She is far too young, and it is
you
who I approached with this marriage idea, not her. Do you believe me?”
Clara shook her head. “You say that, but no, I do not believe you. Jessie is a wonderful girl - much prettier than I am; and she is smart, too. I believe you two would be a good fit. Perhaps more so than us.” The words stung, but she stuffed down her urge to cry. It seemed that this ordeal brought her nothing but grief - she was beginning to think she had been right the first time around, when her mother had first told her and she created a fuss. Nothing good ever came of arranged marriages. Just because it had worked for her twin sisters
did not
mean it was going to work for her, too
She gazed at him for a long moment, waiting for him to speak. Unlike Clara, Oscar took his time replying, thinking of the best way to phrase what he wanted to say. He was careful with his words; Clara was blunt and never sugar coated anything.
“You think so? I disagree. I think
we
make a good couple,” he finally replied, and his voice conveyed nothing but pure honesty.
“You say that, and yet it is clear to me the opposite is quite true. Please, let us end this sooner rather than later – I do not want to drag this out.” She paused, anxiously listening to her family inside. It appeared they were still oblivious to this conversation. Good. Biting her lip harder, Clara shook her head. “I do not want this mentioned to my family, not yet. Mother will be disappointed. I still believe we should cancel this marriage, though.” She uncrossed her arms, letting them hang loosely by her side.
Oscar shuffled uncomfortably, slouching where he stood. “Clara, I truly have no interest in Jessie - please believe me.”
“We should go back to dinner, should we not? My mother will become suspicious.”Clara ignored his statement in favour of urging Oscar to agree with her. “Let us pretend this conversation has not happened, please. I shall tell my family the marriage is off on my own.”
“If that is what you wish, then I shall comply,” he agreed with a sigh, rubbing his temples lightly.
Oscar simply nodded, holding himself straight in an attempt to appear calm. He opened the door for her, putting on a smile.
Clara smiled too, for her family’s benefit. It felt forced, strained.
She sat down beside Ruby again, tucking in her chair. She refused to meet any one's eyes as she took her place.
“You were gone a long time, were you not? What happened?”
“Nothing,” Clara replied simply, clearing her throat, “nothing important.”
She glanced up, holding Oscar’s gaze for barely a second before her gaze dropped back to her plate.
The rest of the meal passed. No one seemed to notice Clara’s quietness, or the way Oscar kept glancing at her with dark, forlorn eyes.
Clara barely left the manor for days. Although Edith and Sam had noticed a change in their daughter’s behavior, she did not tell them what the issue really was. She knew she had to tell them what was wrong eventually - if the marriage was off, they would find out eventually. However, every time she opened her mouth to say it, no words came out.
Jessie had noticed something wrong, too. That was even worse. How could she tell her sister that the reason this failed was because Oscar had eyes for her? It would only bring guilt.
Clara rolled over in her bed, shoving the covers away. She needed to get out, to see friends or just visit the park for some fresh air. Lying around feeling sorry for herself only made her feel
worse.
Besides, he was a Duke - it wasn’t as if she was going to bump into him in town, was it?
With a groan, she stood up to dress, pulling out the first outfit she grabbed. It was a pale pink dress with black ruffling.
She was still wrestling with her small boots when a maid knocked on her bedroom door.
“Come in,” she answered, finally unsticking the zip of her boots with a satisfied smile.
“Someone is downstairs to see you, miss.”
“Who?”
“Duke Oscar Harding.”
Clara’s lips twisted into a frown. “Did he say why he was here?”
The maid pursed her lips and shook her head. “No, he only said it was important. Should I tell him to leave, miss?”
Despite herself, Clara shook her head. “No, thank you. Tell him I shall be down in a moment.”
The maid nodded and left, leaving Clara to steam silently. The nerve of him, appearing in her own home after she had told him the marriage was off.
She took a few moments to calm herself down, smoothing down her skirts and taking a deep breath. When she left her bedroom, she forced herself to act as if nothing was wrong.
Oscar beamed as he saw her, and he stepped forward as if to take her hand. “Good morning, Clara.”
She simply nodded in response. “Oscar. Lettie told me you wanted to see me. She told me it was important.”
“It is,” he replied, dropping his hand when Clara didn’t take it. “I wanted to talk to you about... before.”
“By ‘before’, I assume you mean the dinner event?” Clara replied, sighing faintly. Why did he have to drag this out? Could he not just let it be? “I had thought you would be here to see Jessie, if anyone.”
Oscar frowned, deep dark eyes shadowed. “This is what I mean! I keep telling you I have no interest in courting your sister, and yet you do not listen. So please, listen
now.
”
She blew out a breath, turning her head. “Fine. We should sit in the living room, so we are not overheard.”
“You have not told your parents of this yet?”
“No, and I would prefer they do not find out this way.”
She entered the living room, taking her familiar place by the fire. It was unlit, but just the presence of her usual spot was comforting. She sank into the sofa, wishing she could just close her eyes and pretend this was not happening.
Then Oscar sat across from her, and the image of being alone shattered.
“You wanted me to listen to you, so I will.” She folded her arms and sat back, waiting for him to speak.
For a moment he just gazed at her, lip curled in the way of someone who does not know where to begin. For a moment, Clara was unsure if he even
would.
Then, “I am aware I keep saying I do not wish to court Jessie, and that is true. I am sorry I ever gave you such a thought - I was simply curious about you and your family. I never meant for you to think I was more interested in your sister than you.”
Clara narrowed her eyes, feeling her heart flutter. Oh, how she hated when that happened! She was falling for him more and more every second - the exact opposite of what she
wanted
to happen. “Well, you certainly
did
seem more interested in Jessie. I didn’t even blame you - she has had many potential men in her life, and she is very beautiful.”
“So are you,” Oscar replied with a wide smile, leaning forward to take her hand. This time, Clara did not pull away.
“So you really do not wish to court Jessie?”
“No, and I never have. I know I said marrying now was too soon, but that did not mean I did not want to
at all.
I cannot apologize enough, and I can only hope for your forgiveness.”
She was silent for a long moment, thoughts drifting through her mind, refusing to settle. She had been so
ridiculous,
believing that he wanted Jessie. Of course he was interested in her family - they were soon to be his too, after all. She should have listened from the beginning, not jumped to conclusions.
“I forgive you,” she whispered, nodding so her hair fell in her dark blue eyes, “I was being silly, and I assumed the worst. I should not have.”
He gently took her other hand, gazing at her with his impossibly dark eyes. “Are we all right? We can still cancel this if you wish, stay friends or never see each other again if that is what you truly want - but I sincerely hope it is not.”
It wasn’t. She wanted the chance to get to know Oscar, to learn to love him and, eventually, marry him. However long that took, knowing that was in her future made her all the more eager to put this behind her.
“No, I wish for us to continue as we had - to court, I mean. You are a wonderful man, Oscar, and it was cruel of me to treat you so harshly.” She slipped her hands away from his, fiddling with her skirts. “I am so sorry. You do not deserve me.”
“Please do not say such a thing,” Oscar replied with a deep frown, “You are lovely, Clara, and I can hardly hold one mistake against you. It was not your fault, nor mine. A simple misunderstanding that could have happened to anyone.”
She laughed lightly then, but it was humourless. “An easy mistake? If you say so.” She glanced down, avoiding his gaze.
“An easy mistake,” Oscar repeated surely. “If everything is all right between us, I should like for us to plan another afternoon together. Let us forget all of this and focus on each other. Yes?”
Biting her lip, Clara nodded hesitantly. “Yes, I should like that. I feel we should do something in town, or at your manor. Away from here.” She did not need to add ‘away from Jessie’.
“A good idea, I believe. How about a carriage ride?”
Clara felt herself relax, and she replied eagerly, “yes, I should like that. I must ask, though - are you
sure
you are all right with this? I was so rude.”
“You were not rude! So yes, I am perfectly fine. Now, how about that carriage ride?”
“Now?”
“Of course. Unless you do not want to?”
“I would
love
to,” Clara replied with a laugh. They stood up, and Clara linked her arm through Oscar’s. In that moment, everything felt
perfect.
*****
THE END