Revealed by You (Torn) (27 page)

Brett walked the cop out.

I couldn’t face the reality of the woman sitting in our bedroom possibly carrying my husband’s child.

As Brett joined me back on the bed a couple of minutes later, I looked at Claire. Really taking her in this time as Brett smoothed a hand in circles over my back. Her cheeks were gaunt, her eyes darker than usual. Was she telling the truth? “Was this whole thing a bunch of lies?”

Claire met my gaze. “I...” She sighed. “No.”

“You convinced my husband that he was the father of your baby. You convinced him that you had a miscarriage. He left me because of you. You—”

She shook her head. “I don’t know if…if Brett is the father.”

“That doesn’t fucking matter!”

“Evvie,” Brett whispered in my ear.

“No, she needs to hear this,” I said, looking up at him.

“I am sorry for everything. I know you don’t believe me.” Claire wrung her hands in her lap. “If this baby is Brett’s or Ethan’s, it will be your family either way, Evvie.”

My heart thumped, my body shaking at the mere thought of her carrying something that belonged to me. Call me selfish but I wanted to carry Brett’s baby. I wanted to give him the children that he so deserves.

“Claire, get out,” Brett demanded.

She looked at me. “I—”

“I said, get out,” he snapped.

She nodded and left the room, the sound of the front door shutting a moment later.

My body shook and I moved to the edge of bed. “What if this baby is yours, Brett?”

Brett rose to his feet and walked around the bed before grabbing my hand. He kissed my ring finger and then my forehead. “Bath.”

I huffed. “This is not the time.” I wasn’t in the mood for our nightly rituals. I wanted to rip off every ounce of Claire that had touched him. I knew the situation with her was before me but I couldn’t help but blame her. For everything. A part of me felt sorry for the woman as well. Whether she was telling the truth and it was all Diane’s idea, either Claire was a really good actress, had some screws loose or in fact loved Brett, I didn’t care. I was sick of these women coming in and destroying the very thing we had worked so hard to take control of.

“Bath,” he said, his voice firm.

I rose to my feet and stomped past him before turning on the bath. “Happy—”

Heavy arms spun me before soft lips crashed to mine in a demanding kiss.

My lips parted, taking his tongue deep inside my mouth as his hands roamed over my body.

Brett released me and placed a soft peck on my forehead. Undressing me, he kissed every inch of skin that was revealed to him. It was so sensual, it felt like he was kissing my soul.

By the time he put me in the bathtub, I was a pile of mush. Relaxed and no longer rattled from Claire and Diane showing up not too long ago.

He grabbed a washcloth and ran it over my back. “It scares the shit out of me, knowing that this baby could be mine.” His breath caught. “I worry that if it is, you’ll leave me.”

My eyes widened. “I would never.”

“You say that now, Evvie, but I can’t expect you to be okay with this.” Brett wrapped his arm around my shoulder and pulled me against him.

Tears welled in my eyes. “I feel guilty because I don’t want this baby to be yours. I want to give you a child. Me. Not some other woman.”

“I know,” he whispered against my neck. “As much as I want children with you, right now I want you all to myself. I’m selfish. I couldn’t deal with you giving your love to someone else right now.”

I turned in his arms and sat in his lap, wrapping my legs around his waist. “Listen to me when I tell you that the love I feel for you could never be shared.”

His eyes narrowed. “We’re strong. We will deal with this.”

I nodded and rested my head against his shoulder. Grazing my thumb over his nipple, I sighed. We sat in silence for what felt like an eternity. At that moment, I wished I could have been inside his head. I wanted to know what he was thinking. How he was feeling.

The muscles of his strong jaw ticked, his full lips set in a grim line. The dark scruff of his five o’clock shadow made the tips of my fingers tingle.

A realization came to me, one that I couldn’t believe I never noticed before. “You haven’t had a nightmare since the night before we got married.”

Brett met my gaze and quickly looked away.

I frowned. “You have had one haven’t you?”

He nodded.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked, rising to my knees.

“I’m trying to deal with them.”

I grabbed his chin and forced him to look at me. “Not on your own.”

His jaw clenched. “I don’t want to hurt you. You telling me no...Evvie, for a moment I thought you were scared of me…again.”

Didn’t he know me at all? “Never. God, Brett, I was trying to help you. To help us. I’m no expert but I know if you keep letting your nightmares win, they will take control of you.”

He shook his head. “I don’t fucking think so.”

I huffed and rose to my feet, stepping out of the tub.

“Evvie.”

I shook my head and walked to the bedroom, the cool air caressing my soaked skin. “I don’t want you dealing with this on your own. You need me.”

Brett scrubbed a hand down his face, the droplets of water running down his hard body that I tried so hard to ignore at that moment. “I’m trying to take control of them. I’m trying to deal with them without having to be inside you. Without needing to control you.”

I spun on him. “I need you to control me. You won’t hurt me, Brett.”

“Evvie, I could—”

“No!” I cried.

He raised an eyebrow, momentarily surprised by my outburst.

I took a couple cleansing breaths before I explained. “I don’t want you getting stuck inside your head.”

Brett frowned and closed the distance between us. “You’re worried for me?”

Grazing my fingers down his chest, I brushed them over the soft skin just above his length. “Of course I am. You’ve been doing so well. I don’t want you having a setback.”

He pinched my chin, tilting my head to meet his mouth. “I love you.”

“Promise me,” I breathed.

He curled a hand around the back of my neck. “I promise, but if it gets to be too much, please let me know.”

“What do you mean?” I asked, turning in his arms.

“If I get too rough, tell me.” He kissed my shoulder and met my gaze in the mirror.

I nodded. “I will. I promise you that, my husband.”

***

“I see you two got married,” Dr. Santos said, indicating the rings on our hands.

We both nodded, entwining our fingers.

“How are things?”

I gripped Brett’s hand tight in mine as we sat across from Dr. Santos. His small office smelled of sandalwood and leather, the two scents mixing as one making my body relax.

“We’ve had some minor setbacks,” Brett mumbled.

Dr. Santos raised an eyebrow. “Like what?”

Brett told him about Claire and the possible baby. His mother and stepfather and what they did to him. Hearing about me walking into him being strapped to the bed, made my stomach clench. I never wanted to experience something like ever that again.

“Evvie?”

“Hmm?” I looked at Dr. Santos, not realizing he was speaking to me.

“Are you alright?” The doctors warm brown eyes softened.

I let out a deep breath, my eyes welling with unexpected tears. Brett cupped the back of my neck.

“Tell him everything,” he whispered in my ear.

I nodded and I did. I told him exactly how I felt. “I’m scared that Claire’s baby is Brett’s.”

“Why?”

I chewed my bottom lip. “If this baby is Brett’s, Claire will have her claws in my husband forever. I...” A possessive surge of hatred burst forth, making my heart stutter. I told Dr. Santos about Diane’s plan to trap him, to take his money. But that backfired when she found out about Claire sleeping with my brother.

The doctor nodded. “I can’t imagine that this is easy for you. For either of you.”

Brett grunted in response and brushed his thumb under the sleeve of my sweater. “I don’t want Claire’s baby. I actually never even wanted kids until I met Evvie.”

My heart swelled. “If we’re never blessed with children, as long as I have Brett, I am happy.”

Dr. Santos nodded. “Have you contacted your lawyer, just in case?”

“Yes,” Brett said, cupping my inner thigh. The move, although small, reminded me of our first date. If I knew then what I know now, would I have still agreed to go out with him? I’d like to think I would.

“Now, back to you two.”

I was thankful for the change in subject. “What about us?”

“Still getting nightmares?”

“Yes,” Brett replied, brushing his thumb back and forth against my thigh.

“But he’s not waking me up,” I quickly added.

“What do you do after waking up from the nightmare?” Dr. Santos crossed his ankle over the opposite knee and sat back in his chair.

“I take a cold shower,” Brett mumbled.

“Do you give yourself the release your body needs?”

I couldn’t help it. A prickle of pleasure ran over my skin at the mere thought of Brett touching himself.
So inappropriate, Evvie.

“No.”

Dr. Santos nodded once. “I get why you don’t want to wake Evvie. I honestly do. But if you don’t give yourself the release your body craves, it’ll build and build until you explode. And then you won’t be able to control yourself at all.”

“I get releases later on. Our sex life is healthy. It’s not like I’m deprived or anything.”

My cheeks heated. Hearing them talk so casually about sex made me feel like a prude and I was anything but.

“That moment when you wake up from your nightmare, you need the peace and calm of your wife’s body. Use it. Embrace it. As long as it’s safe, sane and consensual, there is nothing wrong with waking her up to appease your ache.”

“I told him no the night before our wedding,” I said and explained what had happened.

“Evvie is right actually, Brett.” Dr. Santos nodded, his chocolate gaze warming and looking at me proudly. “An addiction is an addiction. Doesn’t matter if it’s to alcohol, drugs or sex. You’re still addicted. Now in your case, it’s not overtly a problem because you are only having sex with your wife.”

“She’s enough for me,” Brett said, kissing the back of my hand.

“Good. Now, I know it’s hard and I can say this from experience, giving up control is difficult but sometimes you need to.”

Brett looked away, his gaze lowering to our joined hands. “What if I can’t?”

“Take things slow. This doesn’t need to be dealt with right away, Brett.”

“That’s what I tried telling him,” I said, brushing my thumb over the back of Brett’s hand. “He’s terrified of hurting me, which I appreciate, but I want to help him anyway that I can.”

“Clearly, your wife is not fragile.”

Brett grunted. “Not at all. But I know I can be rough and even though she,” he cleared his throat. “likes it, I don’t want to hurt her.”

Dr. Santos nodded in my direction. “Are you worried, Evvie?”

I chewed my bottom lip and looked between the two men.

“Tell him, Evvie,” Brett whispered in my ear. “Tell him how much you like the sting of my palm and the bite of my belt.”

A slow grin spread on my face. “I don’t want to scare the poor guy.”

Brett chuckled. “Somehow, I doubt that’ll happen.”

“It would take a lot to scare me, Evvie,” Dr. Santos replied, his mouth turning up into a smile.

“I have a question,” I said, my heart racing against my ribs. I didn’t know how he would react but I needed to get it off my chest.

“Ask away.”

“I...” I cleared my throat. Maybe it was a bad idea. “Never mind.”

“Ask him,” Brett said, cupping the back of my neck.

“What if he thinks I’m a freak?” I asked, playing with Brett’s gold wedding band.

“Dr. Santos, I’ve had the urge to mix pain with pleasure for as long as I can remember.”

My eyes widened at Brett’s admission.

“The need to have a woman whimpering beneath me as I slap her ass or grip her throat, excites and satisfies me,” Brett said, looking down at our joined hands. “When I realized Evvie liked what I gave her, I think I fell in love with her more.”

I smiled as he gave me the courage to talk about my desires. “Thank you.”

Brett placed a hard kiss on my lips before nipping my ear. “You owe me.”

And I knew exactly how he would make me repay him.

“I don’t care what anyone says, you are not a freak, Evvie.”

I frowned at the harsh tone of Dr. Santos’ voice but my body felt like a weight had been lifted off of it. Knowing that there was nothing wrong with me, made me feel better.

“A masochist can be in many forms. Some need pain to get off. Some turn into masochists because they were abused as children. Some turn into Sadists,” Dr. Santos said, looking at Brett. “I’m not a sex therapist by any means but from experience, I can tell you that what you crave is completely normal.”

I let out a heavy sigh. “I never experienced any of this until Brett. I’ve begged for him to…to hurt me.”

He nodded. “That’s normal, and as your husband, Brett should be willing to help quench your dark thirst.”

“And I am. Very willing.” Brett grabbed my hand and kissed my ring finger. “As your husband, your best friend, your lover...I am willing to do anything to make you happy, Evvie. I will curb those cravings. I will please those desires.”

“Thank you. Both of you.” I wiped the tear under my eye.

“Now, Brett. I want you back in after your honeymoon.”

We said goodbye to Dr. Santos and walked hand in hand to Brett’s car. There was a lift in my step and although everything wasn’t fine and well, we had each other. And with that, we could get through anything that life threw at us.

***

“Evvie, wake up.”

I frowned at the deep voice in my ear and rolled onto my back. Warm liquid ran between my legs, coating my inner thighs. At first I thought it was Brett’s semen but the sharp cramp in my lower abdomen let me know it was something different. Something was wrong. Very very wrong.