Mixed Blessing (Mixed Blessing Mystery, Book 1) (30 page)

Wow. This was great. And again, Samson knew exactly what I needed and didn't do more than that.

"I have to go to Mt Eden prison to see Stu," I said instead of saying something completely stupid, such as thanks.

"I know," he replied, then added. "Give me fifteen minutes at
Sensations
to use their computers and I can come with."

"You don't need to do that," I answered immediately.

"Yes I do."

"No, you don't."

"Babe," he said as though calling me babe was an everyday occurrence. "I am not letting you do this alone. I am coming with you."

"No, you're not."

"Yes. I. Am."

I glared at him, he glared at me. Both our arms were crossed over our chests. Then I said the obvious. "Mark won't let you in to see Stu."

"Mark won't know I'm there."

Now I was flabbergasted. I blinked slowly, noticed his eyes were shining all manner of chocolate and taupe and hints of deeper mocha.

"How?" My voice was surprisingly uneven. A waver that I couldn't manage to hide. I knew he was about to let me in on something important. Something I had not been aware of before. This knowledge would change things. And it would mean he had kept something else from me until now.

"Babe," he whispered, taking a step closer, bringing himself well within my personal space. His arms came up and clasped my shoulders, gently. A thumb stroke on each side to calm. I'm not sure why I let him. I was scared, angry, frightened, heartbroken. All of the above. I shouldn't have let him touch me at all. But I was also immobile. Stuck inside my mind, spinning out of control as I remembered finding out what he was. What I had become. And that he had never warned me, confided in me, protected me with honesty. That I had meant so little to him, that he had not shared.

"Do you think you are the only one with unusual talents?" he said softly, unaware of the tumultuous emotions inside.

No, I didn't think I was the only vampire with skills. But, was I the only one here who knew what finding out what Samson could do would mean?

It would mean he had kept something else from me, because I didn't warrant the knowledge, I wasn't worthy of it at all.

It would mean I had let him get close again, close enough to hurt me with his secrets, when I should have stayed on guard.

It would mean he had broken my heart.

Again.

I shook my head from side to side and tried to pull out of his grasp. Samson only tightened his hold and pulled me closer, so close my chest was to his chest, my breath mixed with his. He smelled minty fresh. Another ruse to cover what he was. When I had been human, his fresh breath had been an attraction, now it just reminded me of the lengths he went, to hide.

"Listen to me," he whispered in my ear, his cheek resting against mine. I could feel the roughness of a slight stubble forming along his jawline. His hands were no longer grasping my shoulders, but now as his arms wrapped around my entire body, his fingers were entangled in my hair. "I can convince your detective he doesn't see me. And anyone else who we happen upon. They will have no recollection of me being there."

I didn't want to hear this. I wanted to cover my ears and immaturely sing
la, la, la
. Proof he still kept things from me. Reminder that he had hidden his greatest of secrets when I had opened my heart and let him in. I couldn't do this again. I couldn't let Samson hurt me with words so important but never before shared. It had almost broken me when I found out that he was a vampire, that vampires existed and because he'd kept it all hidden, I had walked into that Rogue's trap. If only he had told me, I would have been prepared. I could have avoided what I now am. But he didn't. He'd hidden things. Kept things secret.

He'd broken my heart.

I shook my head again. Besides, he was wrong. Mark was immune to vampire mind manipulation. This
talent
Samson had was of no use and therefore a waste of his time divulging it. I would have preferred not to know, to have kept my head in the sand a while longer. To have avoided this familiar pain. But then, maybe it was better this way, maybe I
needed
this reminder that Samson could not be trusted at all.

"It won't work," I said instead, in a dull voice. Samson tightened his hold on me.

"I am aware he is immune to our
Sanguis Vitam
influence or a glaze, but what I can do is not like that, Gigi. What I can do is much Darker and entirely impossible to circumvent."

I pulled my head back and looked up at him, his eyes flashed chocolate and a darker colour I hadn't seen before - almost a grey/black. It was stunning, but a little daunting. Samson had always appeared more to me than what others saw, but this was different. This was more sinister, more dangerous. This wasn't the Samson I knew.

"
Sanguis Vitam
influence and a glaze are both a mixture of Light and Dark," he explained softly, holding my gaze and not letting me move a further inch away. "They can be used for good or evil, so they are therefore a combination of both. What I can do is wholly Dark. I change reality for that person. So completely it cannot be reversed. A
Sanguis Vitam
command can be counteracted. A glaze corrected with a further glaze. What I do is permanent. Once done it cannot be undone. Therefore it is considered Dark."

"You're not Dark," I said just as softly, and where that statement had come from I had no idea.

He smiled at me and the darker grey/black colour in his eyes was replaced with chestnut instead.

"No, but once I was. And it is still there, should I need to call upon it."

I wasn't sure that was a good idea. Samson had been bathed in Lucinda's Light when she brought him under her
Lux Lucis Tribuo
line. Could he still do Dark acts after having been washed in Light?

And then something else occurred to me and my body stiffened at that thought, my fangs automatically slipping down and out. Samson noticed, his grip tightening, his gaze becoming more intense. But he didn't say anything, just kept looking into my eyes, willing me not to pull away.

"Have you altered reality for me?" I asked, forcing anger into my words. I was too close to crumbling, I had to use every vampiric instinct I had not show that weakness at all.

"Never," he answered immediately. No hesitation, no need to think on the question. Unequivocal.

I felt all the tension leave my body, not really aware how important his answer had been until then.

"When did you last use this... talent?" I asked, trying to sort it all out in my mind. He wasn't giving me any space to move, to think clearly, I was having to verbalise my thoughts in an effort to quieten the white noise inside my head, brought on by my fear.

"Before I was saved by Lucinda."

And there it was, he had been Light from that moment on. Light when I met him. This would be the first time he attempted to call on his former Dark.

"You can't do this." For so many reasons, the least of which is to call on one's Dark is to be closer to it. I should know. But what I said was, "Lucinda wouldn't approve." The words  had a bitter tone, a sarcastic lean to them I hadn't really intended, it just appeared all on its own.

"Lucinda does not know I can do this."

The world stopped spinning. The moon hung dormant in the night sky. There was no wind through the park's trees, no birds rustled from their sleep. Not even the sound of a car on nearby Karangahape Road.

Lucinda does not know I can do this.

What did that mean?

He moved one of his hands from behind my back to cup my chin and lift my face up to his.

"She would not approve, no. She is of the Light. I can never let her know I can do this. But," he paused, searched my face to make sure I was still with him and then went on, "I am telling you, because you will understand."

Because you will understand
. Not because he felt guilty that he never shared with me before. Not because he owed me one, or he wanted to help out and therefore had no choice but to let me in on his secret now.

But because I would understand.

And I did understand, because I am not all Light. I am half filled with Dark. Samson is a vampire, he will always have access to his Dark, but having had Lucinda's Light wash his soul, it is easier to walk the path of good and not bad. I have Light inside me, half of me is full of Light, but my Dark is right there too. Within reaching distance, grasping distance. Falling-off-the-side-of-the-abyss distance.

I understood because I walked in the Dark as often as I walked in the Light. My vampire-within appeared as a Dark Shadow to me. I knew vampires had unusual and diverse relationships with their vampire or demon-within. Michel's, apparently, was a dragon. I could just picture that, he always appeared more majestic and magical and scary-ass powerful than your average vampire to me. I had always wondered what Samson's vampire-within was like. And recently I had questioned myself on Jett's.

It was not polite to ask. Everyone knew Michel's because Lucinda had discovered and conversed with his vampire-within on several occasions - and was in love with it. A concept I found hard to comprehend.

But I'm not known for my politeness.

"What form does your vampire-within take?"

Samson pulled back from me, a look of genuine shock on his face and then it slowly softened. His lips tipped up at the edges and a smile spread across his handsome face. It was a transformation of angelic proportions. He was always attractive, but simply stunning when he
smiled.

"Now that, babe, is something only my vampire mate will learn. If I tell you, I will have to mark you and claim you as my mate." His voice was low and husky, a direct opposite of his previous conversational tone that was not hard to miss. He leaned in and without any warning brushed his lips across mine. Nothing invasive, but it was definitely possessive. A show of what he intended to do. "I've been fantasising where I will mark you. Somewhere obvious, somewhere others will immediately see. And the second
Sigillum," - Second Sigillum
? - "will be more intimate, just between you and me." He pulled back slightly to look me in the eyes. "So?" he asked mischievously. "Wanna be my mate?"

Ah, no. I pushed back hard against him and managed to break his hold, then quickly placed several feet between us. He just chuckled, a masculine sound that went right through my body and to places I had no intention of letting him near at all, let alone with his fangs. Even if I couldn't get the image of him
marking
me somewhere more intimate for the second
Sigillum
out of my mind.

"Night's marching. I've got to get to Mt Eden," I said with false conviction.

Samson just smiled. "Fifteen minutes on
Sensations
computers and I'll have your addresses." When I started to protest he was in front of me, bearing down on me with a serious expression on his face and
Sanguis Vitam
wrapping around my body and holding me still. "No arguments. I'm coming with you whether you wait for me or not. I don't trust the cop. And I sure as hell don't trust your Sire. So, forgive me, babe, but you're not getting rid of me that easily."

Then he said the three words I had feared and missed in equal measure and never thought I'd hear spoken so determinedly again.

"You are mine."

Then he spun on his heel and headed off towards
Sensations
, making sure his
Sanguis Vitam
left an indelible mark behind.

Sensations
was pumping. Pink's
The Truth About Love
was blasting out of the invisible speakers, the dance floor was packed and the bar equally as crowded. Couples lounged in corners, hidden in the shadows, wrapped up in the atmosphere of
Sensations
late on a week day night. It never failed to amaze me how many people partied mid-week. Sure, Fridays and Saturdays were our busiest, but lately that vibe had spilled over to the usually less popular club nights.

I blinked a few times as we entered through the vestibule and into the main clubroom floor. The lights tonight weren't Middle Eastern in flavour as they had been last time I was here, but more vibrant, like the mood. Uplifting yellows and reds, the odd splash of blue here and there. Primary colours casting bright rainbows over the clientèle. All of which were eager to move and sway and sing along with the music.

The entire room was buzzing, as though the All Blacks had just won the Rugby World Cup and everyone was out on a bender. I flicked my gaze towards the bar and noted Doug wasn't working alone, he had one of Jett's vampires helping him out. Covering for me. I felt a little better that my bar manager wasn't suffering due to my abrupt absence and that Jett was actually doing something about his pulling me away from the club, when it was quite clearly the most popular place in town.

Of course Doug spotted me the moment we walked in, he lifted his chin in greeting from
his side of the bar, his eyes skimming me and then taking in Samson at my side. And in particular, the hand Samson had in the small of my back, gently guiding me through the uncommonly large Tuesday night crowd. I smiled tightly back at Doug, knowing full well I'd cop an earful the next time I worked behind the bar. Doug may have been a man of few words, but he didn't miss a thing - and he had an opinion about most of it.

I shook my head to clear that uncomfortable thought. Doug liked Samson, he did not like how Samson made me feel however.

My eyes skimmed over a table to the side as we passed by and caught the glint of lights off several bottles huddled in the centre. The busboy was obviously being worked off his feet as there seemed to be an inordinate amount of empties piling up in the middle of the polished wooden surface. The young people on the bench seats at the side didn't seem to be too perturbed by the lack of service they were receiving. If anything they were keen to add to their collection, downing their current drinks in record speed and pushing them towards the pile with obvious delight at the the size of their hoard.

And then it hit me. All of the bottles were Vive La Vodka. I stopped dead in my tracks, making Samson slam into the back of me. His arm came out and wrapped around my stomach, in order to steady my forward motion from the collision we'd just had. I ignored his proximity and stared at the twenty odd bottles on top of the table before me, then took in the glassy, inebriated looks on the faces of the group protectively surrounding their stash. New full bottles had appeared, one of their own having made it to the bar and secured more Vive La Vodka.

One of the guys at the table looked up at me in that moment, his eyes blearily taking a sweep from my head to my toes and then slowly back up again.

"Wanna join us, blondie?" he slurred.

I blinked at him, as Samson's arm tightened possessively and then I forced myself to smile and ask, "How long have you been here?"

He looked at his watch, eyelids fluttering profusely to bring it into focus no doubt and then muttered. "Shit, an hour."

"Just an hour?" I asked and he nodded, belched unattractively and then took a large gulp of his newly acquired Vive La Vodka drink.

I twisted in Samson's arms and took a quick look around the club, but I already knew what I would find. Almost every occupant there was drinking SubZero's Vive La Vodka. Not as many empties on tables as with this group, I think they were singular in their efforts to accumulate enough glass to build a pyramid with, but I wasn't fooled into thinking the rest of the overly loud and exuberant crowd hadn't had as much of the addictive mixer as these guys.