Mambo in Chinatown (23 page)

—

Now that Lisa was out of school for the summer and didn’t need to keep up appearances, I felt like she wasn’t even really trying anymore. I gripped Lisa’s upper arm with one hand and the stopwatch with the other. Pa was on the left side of Lisa, propping her under her armpit, straining a bit from the effort. Lisa let us hold most of
her weight. I hated being at home more and more. But I continued to make Lisa do her exercises, not because I still believed I could save her that way, but because I couldn’t think of anything else to do for her. I’d told Mr. Song that my father refused to sign the documents. He’d offered again to talk to Pa but I knew that would do more harm than good.

“I’m tired,” she said. “I hate this. Let go of me.”

“Just another minute and then we can stop, Lisa,” I said. There was no response. She swayed, then tried to drag herself back into her chair.

“Lisa? Hey.” I had to struggle with her body to keep it upright. “Stop it! Stop!” I yelled. Her left arm flailed out and struck Pa in the stomach. He hung on.

Suddenly, all of the frustration and fury burst inside me. I grabbed Lisa’s arms and held them to her sides. “Stop it! Lisa, what are you doing? Do you care about anything anymore? What is going on? Just talk to me!”

“Charlie, it’s all right,” Pa said. I barely heard him.

“Let her go,” he said, pulling at my arm. I didn’t look at him.

Lisa was staring into the distance, beyond my face, still leaning her body backward. I shook her, twice, hard.

“Let her go!” Pa cried.

“Lisa!” My entire body was boiling hot. “What is happening to you? Why are you like this? Tell me!” I was shouting into her face.

Lisa stirred weakly. “What?”

“No! Stop being like that. Stop it!” I grabbed her under both armpits and shook her. Lisa slumped, off balance. Her head rolled back and forth. I swung my left arm and slapped her hard.

“Enough.” Pa’s face was wet with tears. “Enough!” He grabbed me and pulled me off of my sister. She sank into a chair, while I
batted weakly at Pa’s arm. Her cheek was crimson. She was gasping, as if she was too stunned to cry.

I ran from the apartment.

—

There was nowhere I could go to escape myself. I fled to the temple and knelt on one of the burgundy cushions in front of the goddess Kuan Yin. I bent my head so no one could see my expression. I felt like I was running a fever, nauseated by what I had done. A woman was kneeling next to me, shaking a tube filled with bamboo
kau cim
, which were fortune-telling sticks called the Oracle of Kuan Yin. One stick with a number inked on it fell out. She retrieved it and went to find the corresponding written oracle slip, which would give her the answer she’d sought. I was glad to be alone when she left. I laced my hands together and set them against the bridge of my nose. I closed my eyes. I couldn’t even speak to the gods.

After a while, a figure approached. I looked up to find one of the monks, clad in his saffron robes. “I apologize for the intrusion but walking meditation is beginning.” I realized another monk had been beating on the ornately carved wooden drum that signaled the start of the ceremony.

“I’m sorry.” I stood up with haste and wobbled for a moment on my feet.

He steadied me with a hand. “I wish you peace.” His face seemed ageless and kind.

I could feel the weight in how he held my forearm. He was present in every gesture. “I just hurt someone I love.”

“The great gods have great compassion. They have already forgiven you. You did not act from evil.”

I took a half breath, unable to fill my tight chest completely.
“She’s young and defenseless. We promised never to hurt her.” Corporal punishment was common in many traditional Chinese families but Pa and Ma had never believed in it. Even though Uncle had told Pa he was spoiling us, Pa had never raised a hand. But now I’d struck her and, more important, I’d betrayed her trust in me.

“To be human is to be under assault. So much around us leads us to close ourselves off, to harden. And sometimes we act thus. But in spite of all this, we must choose to open, and to open again. Breathe. Open. You will be all right.” With that, he left.

I did as he said and felt the scent of oranges and incense seep into me. I moved to the back of the room to join the line that was already forming for walking the winds of fate, which was what we called this form of meditation. We believed that this was a way to turn aside the evil winds of fate that entered every life. Slowly, I gave myself over to the chanting of the monks as I followed the line of practitioners circling the temple. I did not find salvation, but something of the turmoil inside quieted. When the walking meditation was over, I realized Todd had been a few feet behind me in the line. I’d always thought witches avoided temples since they were willing to engage in darker rituals the monks would never condone. Monks had contact with the true gods, while witches trafficked with the petty ones. I avoided his eyes and hurried away before he could greet me.

—

I returned to the apartment, where Lisa was sleeping on the couch. I bent over and kissed her on her hair. She stirred, realized it was me, then turned away, huddling into the cushions. I deserved it. I held her anyway. “I’m so sorry, Lisa.”

A heavy hand clasped me on the shoulder. It was Pa. He looked at my face, then without a word, he took me in his arms.

A
week later, I was surprised to find a text from Grace on my phone saying she wanted to see me. She must have gotten my number from Godmother Yuan. I met her on a park bench in Gossip Park the following Sunday in the early afternoon. She was waiting for me, as perfectly made-up as a doll, with huge and darkly fringed eyes. I wondered if she was wearing those circle lenses Mo Li had.

I felt strange as I stood there. “Hi, Grace.”

Grace held her hand out to me. “Charlie, it’s good to see you. I know we haven’t been friends in a long time.” Her honesty made me more comfortable, and I gave her hand a quick squeeze as I sat down next to her. She gave me a rueful smile. “I just don’t know who to talk to anymore. I need your help. My family is going nuts and I don’t know what to do.” She stared into the distance. “They want to marry me off. You remember that matchmaking session back in March was a disaster. So now they’re taking things a step further.”

“You could have given Dennis a chance.”

She exploded. “That’s not the point! I’ve been ordered around my entire life. I’m not going to be told whom to marry on top of it all.”

I remembered she’d been caught with a girl. Maybe she didn’t even like guys. “Are they still so upset about that other incident?”

“Oh, you heard about that. Whole Chinatown thinks I’m a flaming lesbian.”

This was the Grace I’d known all those years ago and I couldn’t help chuckling. “Are you?”

A tiny smile played around the corners of her lips. “Maybe.”

I thought about that for a moment. “Did they make you break up with her?”

Now she looked tired. “They’re trying.”

I deliberately leaned against her so that our shoulders touched, and nudged her elbow the way I used to when we were kids. “No one’s better at getting around parents than you.”

She burst out laughing. “Thanks. All I want is to have control over my own body. Can’t I choose for myself? Is that so much to ask?”

“No. I guess they’re just a bit freaked out.”

“It’s not the first time. I dated a Triad guy last year.”

I stared. The Triad was the most dangerous gang in Chinatown. Most of us tried to stay away from them. I knew many of the stores had to pay “protection money” to different gangs, depending on where they were located, otherwise the owner would find his store ransacked. I’d heard rumors of them putting out hits on people they didn’t like.

“He dumped me. He thought I wasn’t paying enough attention to him. I guess I wasn’t really interested in him anyway, I was just trying to prove to myself that I still liked guys.”

“You’re lucky he was the one to leave you.”

“I know. My folks found out later and panicked. I swore I’d be better and then they caught me with this. They’re now planning to send me back to China to find a husband. They’ve already got five men picked out. I just have to choose one of them, marry him there, and bring him back to the U.S.”

I gaped. Traditionally, men who couldn’t find a wife here had been sent back to China to choose a bride. Nowadays, it’d become much harder for anyone to find a bride in China because of the one-child policy. If a family could only have one child, they usually wanted it to be a boy, so many had illegally chosen to abort female fetuses or given girl babies up for adoption. The result was that there were now many more men than women there. I guessed it made sense that women could return to find grooms these days, but I’d never expected someone as westernized as Grace to be sent back. “What do you want me to do?”

“Please speak to my grandmother. She loves you. You should hear her talk about you, it’s like you’re the best thing since the invention of chopsticks. And you always know what to do. At the dim sum restaurant, you did it all correctly, with the tea and the serving of the dishes and everything.”

“No one looked that happy with me.”

She giggled. “Believe me, I was grateful you were there. Why don’t you go out with Dennis?”

“Oh no, thanks. My life’s complicated enough.” I thought of Ryan and ached.

“So will you talk to her? For old times’ sake.”

I gazed at Grace’s troubled expression and missed her usual bright mischievous eyes. We’d always gotten into trouble together as kids, and had so much fun doing it too.

“All right.”

—

I knocked on Godmother Yuan’s door. She had dropped by our apartment several times to try to heal Lisa further, but it hadn’t seemed to make much of a difference yet. When she called for me to come in, I let myself inside. The fan whirred. Her flowered couch was still covered in plastic, her few furnishings tidy. Although her place was very simple, she was lucky to have it. Most elderly women in Chinatown were still working at factories or shops. Godmother could survive on teaching her classes and the gifts she received from students. She bustled into the kitchen area to make me some jasmine tea.

Once we were settled, I said, “I wanted to talk to you about Grace.”

“‘The tiger takes the leap, the eagle spreads its wings.’”

“Excuse me?”

“You two are so different and each creature must follow its own nature.”

“Godmother, tell me the truth. Do you study those wise quotes so that you’re ready when you see me?”

She wrinkled her nose. “Maybe a little. An old woman has to have something to keep her mind busy as well as her body.”

“Okay. I just heard that she’s being sent to China to find a husband.”

“It will be good for her. She is running wild.”

“Don’t you think she has the right to choose her partner? Or to decide if she wants to marry at all?”

She sat up very straight. “She can pick! Who says she can’t?”

“Out of a handful of men that the family has selected for her.”

“The family is very wise, often much wiser than a young heart.”

“Godmother, I know it isn’t my place. I am younger and more
foolish than you. I am not a Yuan. It’s just that Grace asked me to say a few words to you. She made mistakes and she deeply regrets them. She’s building a fine life here. She has just graduated from college. Do you think it’s wise to uproot her? Pair her with a man who may be more traditional, expect her to play a role she can’t fulfill?” Godmother took a dainty sip of tea. I knew she was listening and pressed on. “We both know how Grace is. She’s not going to submit docilely. Even if you manage to force her to marry someone, she’ll find a way out. She always does. How will this end?”

She sighed. “You may not be a Yuan but you are family. Perhaps you are right. Knowing Grace, the marriage will be a disaster. I will speak to her mother. It was only that your uncle was going to China anyway and it seemed to be the ideal opportunity. He’d be the perfect chaperone until Grace met up with our own family.”

“Uncle Henry’s going to China?”

“You didn’t know? He’s going to take your sister there, so she can be treated properly.”

—

I raced back home to our apartment. Pa was in the kitchen, stirring something over the stove, while Lisa was lying on the couch with her eyes closed. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Pa could see from my face what this had to be about. He turned off the flame and came into the living area. “It would have upset you.”

“I have the right to know. Have you told Lisa yet?”

She said, “Tell me what?”

“So you and Uncle were planning to ship her off to China without informing either of us?”

Lisa’s eyes grew enormous.

Pa said, “The temples and witches there are much more
powerful. It will be better for her. The Vision says she must escape the evil that resides here.”

“Lisa hardly speaks any Chinese,” I said, enunciating carefully. I had to stay calm.

“That’s why Uncle Henry will be going with her.”

I gripped the sides of my head as if to cover my ears. “What about his practice?”

“Aunt Monica and Dennis will stay here and keep the office open for the regular prescriptions. Dennis can handle the simpler cases, he’s been doing so for months. Uncle’s always wanted to go back to China and this is his chance. And he’ll be able to help Lisa at the same time.”

I still had a terrible feeling about this. “How can we afford it?”

Pa let out a deep breath. “Uncle Henry will pay for it. We are very lucky to have such a generous man in our family.”

“I think it’s an awful idea. We don’t even know if any of this stuff works. They could do anything to her there, scar her, both physically and emotionally.”

“Uncle Henry will accompany her to every treatment and the Vision is a very powerful witch. We must trust their advice.”

“I don’t know about the Vision.”

“She has helped many people in Chinatown. Charlie, I know you’re worried about your sister but she won’t be alone. Uncle Henry wants to help her as much as you do. He’ll make sure that nothing bad happens to her. You must have more of an open mind.”

“I still can’t believe you’re going to send her to a country she’s never been to.”

“I’m just letting her go home.”

“No, this is our home. America. Lisa and I were born here and this is where we belong. You too, only you don’t realize it yet. If
you went back to China, you’d see how much you’ve changed as well.”

“Ridiculous. We are Chinese, and in the end, we belong to China. Uncle and I know and love all of the people she’ll be staying with. You don’t, but they are our friends and family.”

“How long?”

“Uncle must return after a few weeks. He cannot afford to keep his practice shut for longer than that. Lisa . . .” His voice trailed off and he looked away.

“Will stay as long as necessary to heal her,” I finished for him, folding my arms. “What about Hunter?”

“This is more important. A Chinese family has the right to send a child back to China. We have to do what is best for her. We cannot be selfish and keep her here.”

Lisa had been quiet this entire time. Now she spoke in a voice that trembled. “Please don’t make me go to China. Please.” She started to tear up.

I went over to her and took her hand in mine. “I won’t let them.” I took my left hand to brush her forehead three times, as I always did, to brush away her fear and bad luck. I thought about how I’d slapped her. How could I ever forgive myself? Then something occurred to me. What was it that Todd had said, back in the hallway at Uncle’s office? “Forgive yourself, forgive that hand.” He’d known I would hit her. Suddenly, I understood the Vision’s secret and realized maybe I had someone who could help us.

—

Todd lived in an old apartment building on East Broadway with his older brother. When he answered the door, I didn’t give him a chance to speak. “It’s you, isn’t it? You’re the power behind the Vision.”

He stiffened, then said, “Do you want to come in?”

We sat on his folding chairs in the tiny studio. “Why do you work for her? Why don’t you start for yourself?”

He gave a half-hearted shrug. “What would they call me? Prophecy of the Strange Haircut? She’s got it going: she’s old, she’s got the freaky eye. You want a glass of water? That’s all I have.”

“No, thanks. So what exactly do you do for the Vision?”

“She handles most things on her own. The incense burning, releasing of life, the spells, that’s her. I do the real psychic stuff.”

“Like when she has to predict the future.”

“Yeah. Or talk to spirits, that kind of thing. That’s why she’s so successful, partly because my predictions usually come true and partly because people like to believe in mumbo jumbo.”

He stared out the window for a moment, then said, “I buy egg cakes every day. On Canal Street.”

“What?” He was so different.

“She never sees me.”

Ah, this was about Zan. “A lot of people buy egg cakes. If you want her to notice you, maybe you should speak to her. So will you help me?”

“With your sister? The Vision does most of the exorcisms and stuff.”

“But I don’t think there’s anything to be exorcised.”

“There usually isn’t. Spirits enjoy their space. She didn’t bring me with her when she did your place so that means you’re right.”

“So she’s cheating people? When she did the Release of Life, Lisa seemed to get better.”

“Well, who knows what really happened? Any act of compassion is powerful. She’s got the same power we all do, that of our souls and desires. Sometimes her spells work just because people believe
in her. When you pay that much money, you want to think it was effective or maybe it was coincidence.”

“But she doesn’t have any psychic abilities whatsoever? She told me my new job would amount to nothing, and I’ve never stopped thinking about it.”

“No, you don’t need to worry about that. Completely untrue.”

“This is crazy, Todd. How can you work for her? Knowing you’re the real thing and she’s the fake?”

“I gotta make a living too. At least I get to use my skills sometimes to help people. No one except for the witch would hire me. I’m not much use otherwise. I’m constantly having to tune things out and I get distracted. Don’t you remember me in high school? I was so strange, no one would talk to me.”

I clasped my hands together so tightly that the knuckles were white, then slowly asked, “Can you tell me what’s wrong with Lisa?”

“I haven’t had that much access to her. The Vision’s kept me mostly off of her case. Even with your uncle’s treatments, she had me stay outside, probably because she didn’t want me to reveal that there was no spirit possessing your sister.”

“But I’m here now and I can give you something that belongs to her. But are you going to do something . . .” I paused a moment. “. . . weird with it?”

“No, what do you think I am, a witch? I’ll just try to make contact with her energy and see what I feel. The best would be to get me something that is around her a lot.”

I took Lisa’s T-shirt and an envelope out of the bag. “Actually, I brought you the T-shirt she sleeps in and a photo. The Vision wanted them when she was doing her rituals, so I figured you might want them too.”

“She’s just copying me.” Todd held out his hand for the T-shirt and envelope.

“That prophecy about what one sister gains, the other shall lose—was that you?”