Magic of the Wood House (The Elemental Phases Book 6) (11 page)

"Yes, you may be sure that the
stairs are fire-proof,” said Mr. Grewgious, “and that any outbreak of the
devouring element would be perceived and suppressed by the watchmen."

Charles Dickens- “The Mystery of
Edwin Drood”

Christmas
Eve Evening

“I
always figured we’d get Banished sooner or later.”  Djinn made a face at the
shaky images of flames and destruction playing on the TV.  “I just figured we’d
get to have the fun of actually
committing
the horrific crimes we got
punished for.”

Pele
nodded in disgust.  “It’s almost insulting.  I’d have roasted
way
more
victims by now.  Look at that!”  She waved an irritated hand towards the
manically laughing Pele on screen.  “That phony bitch can’t aim for shit!  It’s
like she’s
letting
them escape.  How could anyone think that’s really
me?”

“Fucking
hell.”  Teja muttered.

On
the news, a fake-Pele was gleefully torching the Cold Palace with ten foot long
flames, while a fake-Alder and a fake-Djinn smashed windows in the background. 
All around them, terrified Cold Phases ran for their lives.

“Is
this happening right now?”  She demanded, automatically scanning the crowd for
any sign or Eian or Freya.  Her Cold Phase cousins were nowhere in sight.  “What
the hell is going on?”

The
Cold Kingdom was a land of endless frost and dark seas.  An eternal blizzard
turned the air there into snow globe, with frozen crystals sparkling as they
floated down.  At its center, the huge palace was constructed entirely out of
mysterious blue ice.  It loomed over the landscape, glowing with power.  Her
father’s homeland was a beautiful, forbidding place that Teja had always
secretly loved.

Now,
most of the kingdom’s structures were on fire, bystanders were screaming in
terror, and the Fire Phases were right in the middle of the chaos.

…Or
at least some pod-people, body-snatched versions of them.

“Reflection
Phases.”  Qadesh said from behind her.  He was the largest and quietest member
of the family, with a bandana cinched around his dark hair.  He knew how wait
for an opening to attack and, right now, all of his deadly focus was pinned on
the TV.  “Has to be them, using their powers to set us up.”  Reflection Phases
could change their appearance to look like anyone.

“No
one can possibly think that’s really you, Qadesh.”  Hope assured him earnestly. 
“Look at how happy he is.  I think he’s even
smiling!
”

Sure
enough, the doppelganger Qadesh was cavorting in the burning rubble, a huge
grin on his usually stoic face.  Under other circumstances, it would’ve been
kind of hilarious to see the family assassin looking so cheerful.

“We
should be taping this.”  Djinn mused.

Qadesh’s
jaw ticked.

A
studio shot of Atlanta, the ubiquitous blonde newscaster, popped up in the
corner of the screen.  Gravity Phases always appeared grave, but Atlanta
somehow managed to look like she was forever reporting on the death of every
puppy in the world.  “These shocking images are coming to us live from the Cold
Kingdom, where the Fire House has launched a ruthless attack on innocent civilians.”

“Every
time she’s reporting on us, it’s the same damn words.  ‘Ruthless,’ ‘shocking,’
‘demented.’”  Pele flicked Atlanta off.  “Get a real job, bitch.”

“Most
people have already the fled the scene, but the damage is still horrific.  A
vital part of our culture is being threatened and, once again, the Fire House
is to blame.”

Djinn
made a face.  “Vital part of our culture, my ass.  The place has always been a
dump.”

“The
Fire Phases have long been a thorn in the side of decent, law-abiding people.” 
Atlanta continued in her typical style of unbiased journalism.  “Just today
they reported killed an innocent Air Phase in the human realm.”

“That
was
Sully
.”  Alder protested.  He looked over at Sullivan.  “They’re
trying to steal your credit!”

Sullivan
ignored him, his eyes locked on the sixty-two inch screen.

Atlanta
kept jabbering.  “But, this level of aggression cannot go unchecked.  Several
Houses have vowed not to wait for formal sanctions.  They wish to call a
special hearing and Banish these outlaw hoodlums, once and for all.”

“Outlaw
hoodlums!”  Missy echoed in excitement.  “Ooooh, I
like
that!”

“Phases
from many Houses are no doubt languishing helplessly in Freya’s hospital, at
this very moment.”  Atlanta continued.  “We aren’t sure how many innocent
people will perish in their sick beds, because of these…”

“Blah,
blah, blah.”  Djinn summed up and lifted the remote control.  “Hey, someone
remind me why the Reflection Phases hate us, again.  I swear, I barely know
those fuckers.”  He clicked to another channel without waiting for an answer
and made a frustrated sound.  “And
of course
it’s on every damn
network.  Come on, man… This crap is interrupting all the Christmas specials.”

“I
think it’s exciting to have new enemies.”  Missy chirped from her perch on the
arm of her father’s chair.  Her combat boots were daintily crossed at the
ankle, her Alice in Wonderland blue dress scorched from countless battles.  As
usual, she was happily teetering on the brink of total madness.  She’d always
been a little eccentric, but the Fall had pushed her to right to the breaking
point.  If Missy didn’t find something to anchor her, it was just a matter of
time before she fell off the edge.  “We’ll be the noble heroes who fight
persecution, just like Al Capone.”  Missy gave an excited clap.  “Yay!”

Teja
didn’t think it was quite so fun.

She
still didn’t see any of her Cold Phase relatives on screen.  Freya and Eian
hated her, but she didn’t want them dead.  She’d never wanted to be part of the
war between the Fire and Cold Houses.  Not that anyone believed that.  Now
somebody was setting up half of her family to take the blame for attacking the
other
half of her family.

She
glanced at Sullivan to see how he was taking this newest weirdness.

Her
Match was staring at the television with a thoughtful expression on his face. 
“You’re being framed.”  He said simply.

“Good
boy!”  Djinn praised.  He’d apparently forgotten that Sullivan wasn’t a dog,
again.  “You see that, everybody?  Even
Dull
ivan gets that this is a set
up.  But, I betcha that moron Job
still
shows up to bitch at us, even
though a goddamn
human
can see those jackholes look nothing like us.”

“They
look exactly like you.”  Sullivan insisted.  “Except, their hair is wrong.  The
red isn’t the same.”  His color-blindness must have let him see subtle
differences in the shades that even the Reflection Phases missed.  “Also, I
don’t think you’d have to use flamethrowers to burn down a city.  You guys
are
the flamethrowers.” He gestured towards the weapons strapped to the imposters’
backs.

“Good
point, human.”  Pele made a disgusted face.  “This amateur hour is
seriously
insulting.”

“Seriously.” 
Djinn agreed.  “We’re fucking professionals, ya know?”

“Why
am I not being impersonated?”  Kingu asked in a disgruntled voice.  “I could be
flattening that kingdom, too.”

“Because
they can’t manufacture your powers.”  Qadesh said flatly.  “Everyone would see
it’s fake.”

Sullivan
glanced over at Teja.  “Those guys are --like-- shape-shifters, aren’t they?  I
knew
you were mutants.  Everyone said, ‘No, no, no,’ but I
knew
it.  Shape shifters.”  He arched a brow.  “I
knew
you couldn’t really be
this beautiful.”

Teja
glowered at him.  “We aren’t shape shifters, Sullivan.”

“Explain
your television star clones, then.”

“Those
guys are Reflection Phases.”  Alder put in helpfully.  “They’re not shape
shifters.  They can just look like anyone they choose.”

Sullivan
pinched the bridge of his nose.  “How is that
not
a shape shifter,
Alder?”

Alder
hesitated, trying to come up with a reason and drawing a blank.  He looked over
at Djinn.  “Hey, the human has a point.  Those bastards are shape shifters!”

“I
don’t care what they are, they’re fucking up my Christmas party.”  Hope
complained.  She made a face and headed off wrap gifts in black paper covered
with the chalk outlines of bodies.

“Damn
Reflection House shape shifters.”  Pele shook her head.  “The only things
they’ve ever been good for is high-priced hooking.  Yeah, fine.  They can play
kinky sex games all dolled up to look like Marilyn Monroe, but no
way
did they come up with crap like this on their own.”  She waved a hand at the
TV.  “They’re too predictable for this kind of trick.”

“I’m
betting they’re just the hired guns.”  Satour agreed.  The guy was never
happier than when he was predicting doom, so this was making his day.  “They hate
us, but no more than everybody else.  There has to be someone bigger behind
this.”

For
once, Teja didn’t brush off Satour’s paranoid theories.  It was easy to lose
track of all the crazies wanting them dead, so the Fire House kept a running
list taped to the refrigerator.  Lately, it had been updated with such notable
enemies as, “That Damn Cow Again,” “Chick from the Future (Probably)” and “The Other
Bald Dude at Sears.”  But no one had mentioned any Reflection Phases with a
vendetta headed their way.

Yuan,
of the Reflection House was one of the most powerful Elementals alive, but why
would he organize attack the Cold Kingdom?  Why would
anyone?
  The Cold
Phases weren’t warriors.  They were mostly just scientists.

“We
should go stop those guys before they kill somebody.”  Sullivan put in.  He
really was a Wood Phase beneath the human veneer.  They were all about the
saving and protecting.  “No one innocent has to die.”

Djinn
scoffed at that idea.  “I’m not going to the fucking Cold Kingdom.  Let the
whole place melt.”  He settled down to watch it burn.  “All we need is popcorn
and a couple beers.”

“If
those bastards commit mass murder, everyone’s going to think it was you.”  Sullivan
stressed, as if maybe they didn’t understand the ramifications.

“We
get blamed for everything.”  Hope sniffed, adding a sparkly bow to her morbid
package.  “It’s so unfair.”

Pele
shrugged.  “I don’t see much of a downside this time.  We get the credit and we
don’t even have to get our feet damp in the snow.  Just because
you
don’t care about the news depriving you of
your
recognition for killing
Yasil, doesn’t mean the rest of us don’t like a little bit of glory, Sullivan. 
Besides, you should be
happy
, about this.  Those Cold dicks stole your
memories.”

“We
have very little evidence that they were involved.”

Djinn
scoffed at that.  “Oh, they were involved.”  He judged with passionate
certainty.  “It was all them, them, one hundred percent
them
.  Right,
Pey?”

“Yep.”

“See?” 
Djinn exclaimed like that was proof beyond a reasonable doubt.  “It’s so
obvious.  How can you…?”  He stopped short, grinning in sudden delight.  “Hey,
Tej!  There’s Xeroxed you.”  He pointed at the screen.  “Good.  I’d hate for
you to feel left out of our family’s newest war crimes.”

“It’s
Teja-vu.”  Missy chortled.

Kingu
chuckled at that.

Teja
refocused on the screen.  A matching Teja had been added to the ranks, which
was just all kinds of annoying.  The real her did
not
look that
scrawny.  Granted she’d lost some weight since the Fall, but this imposter
lacked all the pleasing curves Elemental men looked for in a woman.  That
pissed her off more than anything.

Teja
glared up at Sullivan, gauging his reaction to the skinny imposter.  “I look
way
better than her.”  She informed him in a tone that dared him to disagree.

Sullivan
flicked her a sideways look.  “I know.  Again, being
color blind
isn’t
the same as being
actually
blind.”

Teja
grunted, satisfied with his quick answer.

Alder
scowled at a close-up of the Alter Alder.  “He’s wearing my favorite Hendrix
shirt!  I am going to kill that good-looking asshole so hard…”

Teja
didn’t hear the rest of that complaint.  All her attention was suddenly
centered on a blonde figure hurrying across the screen.  Her idiot cousin Freya
wasn’t running away from the destruction and death… she was headed straight for
the Teja replicant.

Shit.

Freya
was the Elementals’ foremost doctor and a chattering, disapproving
know-it-all.  She spoke about three hundred words a second, most of them
complaints about Teja.  On her best day, Freya was annoying and pushy.  Given
her subpar people skills and nails-on-a-chalkboard prattling, there was no way
Freya was going to endear herself to the armed maniacs.