Leif (Existence) (7 page)

“That’s better. Your heart has slowed down. I don’t like having you scar
ed. I never want you to fear me,” I squeezed her hand in reassurance of my sincerity.
“Come for a walk with me, please. We c
an talk while I show you around.
”
I reached for the
stone
wall
that I knew would open up onto Bourbon Street.

Pagan stepped out i
nto the warm
New Orleans
evening. Her eyes widened in shock as
she
scanned our surroundings. The
bars, dance clubs, and voodoo shops
were all lit up against the darkness of the night. Tap dancing kids, drunken men, and topless women all claimed her attention as if it were a play being performed just for her. The familiarity of the scene in front of us suddenly seemed vulgar as I watched Pagan take in t
he lewd
behavior I’d grown up amidst
.
I didn’t want her watching anymore. It was
all-wrong
. She di
dn’t belong. She was too good, t
oo pure.

“Come on Pagan, you’ve got your eyeful. Let’s go for a ride,”
I replied leading her toward the buggy I’d summoned.

“We’re going to ride?”
She asked as I picked her up and placed her safely inside. I suddenly wanted to take her somewhere that was good enough for her. This was too dirty. It wouldn’t do.

“Yep,”
I replied taking the seat across from her.
“So, what do you think of Bourbon Street? Everything you’d ever imagined?”
I wanted to make light of the inappropriate behavior I’d just forced her to witness.

“These shops, the Voodoo ones
…,
”
she asked trailing off.

Chuckling
,
I glanced over at one of the ridiculous shops set up to take advantage
of tourist
with hopes of finding a spell for true love or a skinner waist line or revenge on their enemies.
If they only knew.

“Are owned by regular people sucking the tourists dry. Not one of them
hold
any power. I’d guess if a real voodoo spirit were to grace their doors they’d close up and leave town. The real voodoo isn’t along these streets. It can only be found deep in the swamp by those chosen by the spirits to embody it.”

“T
his is the Garden District. It’
s a nicer area. The most well preserved southern mansions can be found right here.
” I explained relieved to be leaving the filth of my world behind us
.

“What did you want to talk to me about Leif? Why am I here?”


She was ready to talk now. Okay. We could talk. I leaned forward resting my elbows on my knees and held her gaze.

“I know you understand now what your mother did. You remember all the times I’ve come to you in your life. You know it was
me
that day in the old Voodoo queen’s home that removed the sickness from your body. Yes, I did it and I require, my father requires,
restitution
for it. All
gris
gris
comes with payment. Not the monetary kind like the voodoo shop owners require. Real Voodoo requires something more. The more difficult the request, the more the
payment will be
.

I wanted you to live Pagan. I’d watched you from the moment you arrived in
New Orleans. The nurse watching over you was the granddaughter of the voodoo queen. She brought me to see you the first day you arrived. I was fascinated with your spunk. My father was looking for my mate and I went to him with the request to have you. He said we must wait. That if it
was
meant to happen then fate would play into our hands. When the doctors said you would not see another day, your mother went to the nurse and she brought you to the old voodoo queen who summoned me.”
I forced myself to stop. She needed time to process all of this. I’d just been waiting so long to tell her all these things. Time was short.
Dankmar
would find her soon. Our time was limited and I wanted so badly to make her understand.

“A life cannot be spared for free. The cost is a life for a life. I saved your life and in doing so bought your soul. It has been mine since the day you were healed. I’ve been near you ever since.”

The frown on Pagan’s face puckered her forehead. 
“None of this makes sense. Why did you become human? Why did you ignore me for years? Why did you pretend with me? Why do you want me? Why can’t you just let me go?”

She was ready to listen.

Then I felt his power.
The life around us stilled.
Not even the birds would remain in Death’s presence. I’d been so close to making her understand.
So damn close
.

“He’s here. How the hell did
Dankmar
get here so quickly?”
Without a backward glance I left her there. I wasn’t ready to face
Dankmar
. He still held all the cards— h
er love and his authority over life.

8.
He is Death. See him for who he is
- Leif

             
“
If’n
de
gurl
won come den
ahm
gonna
take an udder,” Father informed me announcing his appearance. Standing outside the high school where I’d been following P
agan for the past three years, watching her and waiting on her,
I’d thought
taking her from her soul’s mate would be my biggest hurdle but her mate had made it way too easy.

             
“Father,” I replied in greeting. “I don’t want another. You know that. I want Pagan.”

             
“De
gurl
needs a push in da right direction, huh.”

             
“You taking another soul
isn’t
going to affect her. She won’t realize that you took a soul in her place. And I’m not telling her that. It would make me appear as an even bigger monster in her eyes
than
I already do.”

             
Father let out an
eery
c
huckle, “I
dinna
say who
woulda
t
ake her place, hmmm.”

             
“What is that supposed to mean?” I asked concern at his humor jerking my thoughts off Pagan and my reentrance to her human world.

             
“
Ahm
gonna
make
shur
dat
gurl
makes da right choice.
Dats
all.”

             
“What do you mean?” I asked but it was too late. He was gone. With a frustrated sigh
,
I jerked my
backpack
up on my shoulder and headed for the front doors of the high school. Pagan wasn’t scared of the boy she’d always known as a classmate. I needed to remind her that I was still that guy. Nothing had changed.

             
   
                                     
   
~*~

             
“Speaking of hotness, here comes your last drool-worthy boyfriend,” Pagan’s best friend since childhood whispered as I made my way toward them.

             
Right as I reached her locker, she closed it a little too loudly before turning to face me. I wanted to laugh at her angry glare but I figured that wouldn’t win me any points.  Seeing her brave enough to be angry
with
me was a nice change. Anything was better than her being terrified of me.

“Leif,” she
mumbled. Her eyes darted everywhere but directly at me. She was so dang cute.

“Pagan, it’s good to see you too.”


“What do you need?”
She sna
pped and Miranda elbowed her a
little too hard. I clinched my fist to keep from reaching out and grabbing her friend
’
s arm and moving her away from Pagan.

“Well, I was wondering about the tutoring. I mean, now that I’m back I need to keep up my grade and you know I can’t do it without your help.”

Pagan’s eyes finally focused on me and went wide. That hadn’t been what she was expecting me to say. Good. 
“Ah, well, when you
left
I filled your spot. But I’m sure there are other tutors available if you feel you
really
need one.”

“But you were so helpful. I doubt anyone else will be able to help me the way you did.”
Anger flashed in her pretty eyes as she
pulled
her backpack up her arm and stepped around me.

“I’
m so sorry, Leif.
I don’t know what has gotten in
to her today,” Miranda began babbling. I was affecting her. The emotion was a good thing.

“It’s okay. I did leave without a word. I’m sure I have a lot of making up to do.”

“Well, she has kind of move
d on,
ya
know?
” I didn’t want to listen to Miranda tell me about Dank Walker and his claim on what was mine.

Brushing her off with a nod, I walked away without a word in response.

             
The sirens drew me from my path to the homeroom I would now be sharing with Pagan. Instead, I headed out to the backdoors and followed Pagan and Miranda who had both broken into a run toward the football field.

             
As I neared
,
I saw the field filled with emergency technicians, students, and the sounds of
panicked
crie
s
drifted through
the air as Miranda dra
ped herself over Wyatt’s
lifeless body. Lifting my eyes,
I found
Dankmar
standing there unnoticed by the crowd. The pain and confusion on his face told me all I needed to know.

             
Wyatt had been what my
father’s riddle was about earlier
. He’d taken Wyatt in Pagan’s place. He hadn’t taken just any soul but a soul s
he would mourn— a
soul that would get her attention.

             
Pagan lifted her eyes and I watched as she glared at Death. She finally understood.
She didn’t understand that this death was not one taken by
Dankmar
but she did get a taste of what his purpose in life consisted of. He wasn’t the rocker that girls fawned over. 
“He is Death, see him for who he is,” I whispered before turning and leaving the tragedy behind me.
             

9.
“It looks like it’s just you and
me.
”
- Leif

“Whoa, not who I expected to see here,” I said aloud
in order to
announce my presence. Pagan and Miranda hadn’t realized they weren’t alone in the cemetery. But then Pagan seemed to have her hands full with a very drunk Miranda. “And drinking?” I shifted my gaze from the bottle of wine to Pagan.

“She wanted to come here. I figured she needed some courage to face it.” The annoyed snip in her voice I’d recently grown accustomed to was gone. She sounded… tired.

Being the cause of all the pain I’d watched her experience since Wyatt’s death
weighed heavy on my chest. Now, she looked like she was at her breaking point.
“I can understand that,”
I replied
.

Miranda scooted over and patted the spot beside her on the bench in front of Wyatt’s grave.
“Come sit,”
she instructed me with a slur.

I took the offered seat.
“Here, it’s good,” Miranda
shoved the bottle into my chest. Yeah, she’d had way too much.

“Don’t mind if I do
,” If I drank some maybe it would help me deal with what I was about to do. Time was running out. If I didn’t get Pagan’s attention tonight it was very possible my f
ather would take another soul—s
omeone else close to her. I couldn’t let that happen
.

“Sorry I ran off today and we
juslefyouthere
.”
Miranda apologized for the episode I’d witnessed at the mall earlier. Pagan didn’t respond. Instead she reached across Miranda and took the wine bottle out of my hand.

“You’ve reached your limit Miranda. Any m
ore and you’ll hate me tomorrow.
”
Pagan said as she
shoved
the cork back in the bottle and set it down on the ground beside her feet.

“I was worried about you but I saw Pagan caught up with you,”
I responded to Miranda.

“
Yesss
. Don know
whatid
do
withouther
,” Miranda slurred.
             
             

“She’s pretty specia
l,” I agreed leaning forward to meet Pagan’s gaze.

Miranda nodded then started to lay her head on
Pagan’s
shoulder but missed and fell forward.
I reached down and pulled her back up as Pagan did the same thing. Our hands brushed and I felt
a
warm jolt from the brief contact. Begging her wouldn’t work but at times like this I often wondered if it just m
ight
sway her vote a little bit. Maybe.

“Okay, I believe it’s time for us to go home,”
Pagan announced standing up.
“Come on, you. Let’s get you to bed.”