Laugh or Death (Lexi Graves Mysteries Book 6) (11 page)

"Fine. Take your foot out of the door and I'll talk to you."

"Okay, okay then." The pressure let up and I slid my foot backwards. The door slammed in my face and I sighed. It was a day for sighing. Raising my fist, I hammered on the door. "I just need to speak to Nancy to find out if she's okay. She's a missing person. I'm leaving my card, okay? And I might send you a hospital bill for a broken toe so don't be surprised if you get one!" I grabbed a business card from my wallet and slipped it under the door. A moment later, it shot back. I pushed it back under, and it shot back again. "Joelle," I said, louder than necessary, "keep the card. Give it to Nancy. If it comes back again, I'm going to plaster my business cards all over your building and tell all your neighbors you're a wanted fugitive." This time, the card didn't come back.

I hobbled downstairs, wishing
it were a flats day as I exited the building. I fully assumed Joelle was watching every painful step I took as I limped to my car. Safely inside, the pain dissipating, I called Solomon. "I need to requisition someone to watch Joelle Brennan," I told him. "She knows where Nancy is and she's not giving up the goods."

"I'll send Fletcher."

Hah!
I thought. That was a good payback for Fletcher being so sarcastic earlier.

~

Fletcher’s arrival was my cue to leave. Given the unmitigated throbbing in my foot, it wasn't a moment too soon. Instead of heading back to the office, I decided to run a few errands I'd been putting off before hitting Lily up at the bar. Picking up my dry cleaning and browsing the sale rail in a few clothing stores did a lot for my mood, but not much for my foot. The validity of my threat to send Joelle a hospital bill was growing rapidly.

I paused outside the coffee shop I sat in with Maddox only the day before and rummaged in my purse for my cell phone
. Feeling it vibrate, I looked up as a shadow fell over me.

"You look like you could do with one of these," said Leo, handing me a tall
, cardboard cup. "I was just inside the coffee shop, when I saw you, and I thought, there's a woman who looks like she needs her coffee. It's your favorite."

"I... I..." I stuttered in surprise.

"Please, I insist. Maybe you can catch me up on the case? Have you found out anything new about Nancy?"

"No, I'm sorry, I haven't," I said, taking the coffee, and giving him a semi-truth in return.

"No, I'm the one who's sorry. I keep pestering you about the case, and you've just gone through that scary ordeal and... are you limping?"

"Stubbed toe," I lied.

"Occupational hazard?"

"More like
a hazard of being human."

"I was worried it was because of the robbery, but I guess a stubbed toe will heal soon. I won't trouble you anymore. I don't want to pester you."

Guilt gnawed at me. Leo was just trying to be nice, and all I could be was snippy. I felt bad and it probably showed. "You're not pestering me. I'm following up new leads, but it's not easy, and I don't have anything to tell you right now."

"Message received." He stepped away, crestfallen, his head hanging. "I can see I'm getting in your way."

"I'm sorry, Leo, don't be disheartened. I'll call you soon, okay?"

"Okay. Look forward to it." Leo stepped around me and walked away down the street. Just as he reached the crosswalk, my phone began to vibrate again. This time
, I found it, and answered.

"What did he want?" asked Solomon.

I looked around. "Huh? What? Where are you?"

"Behind you, across the street. Don't wave!"

I put my hand down. "Oops, sorry. What did Leo want?"

"He wanted to know about any
new information. I told him I was following up new leads, but didn't have anything to tell him."

"Good. Don't tell him anything, ever, unless I'm there."

"Oookay. Why are you here anyway?"

"Following Leo."

"You know who walked away down the street, don't you?"

Solomon laughed. "I noticed. Delgado is following him. Did he buy you a coffee?"

I looked at my cup. "That's what he said. He said he saw me from the coffee shop."

"He saw you before that. I saw him notice you when you went into the dry cleaners. He waited a moment
, then walked past and went into the coffee shop."

"So what? Maybe it reminded him to get his laundry done while he's in town."

"Maybe," said Solomon, but he didn't sound convinced. "Why are you limping?"

"Joelle slammed
my foot in the door and it hurts like crazy."

"Do you want to go to the hospital?"

"No, I'm sure it's just bruised."

"Take the rest of the day off. Put your foot up and ice it. You can fill me in on Joelle later. Did you..."

"Get your suit from the cleaners? Yes, I did. I'll bring it over."

"No, stay there, I'll come get it from you. I don't like seeing you limp." The door to Solomon's SUV opened and he jogged across the street, stopping in front of me. He relieved me of his suit, wrapped his arms around me,
and gave me the kiss to end all kisses before pulling away as my brain froze momentarily. While I gazed up at him with unabashed delight, he took the coffee and dropped it in the trash, replacing it with his coffee loyalty card.

"Hey, that was my favorite!" I protested.

"Never take candy from strangers, even if that candy is coffee," Solomon warned. "And rest. That's an order."

~

Since rest was a high point of my life, right after shoe shopping, dress shopping, and catching criminals, I hightailed it over to Lily's bar. I was glad that Solomon didn't add "go home" to his command. That was why my foot was now submerged in a champagne bucket, the crushed ice inside simultaneously soothing my foot and relieving it of all sensation.

"I thought my day was bad," said Lily as she stared at my
injured foot. We were sitting in her office at the back of the bar, away from prying eyes, and Lily appeared to be in a mood as we drank our virgin Long Islands. I guessed that when she didn't offer me a cocktail as soon as I entered.

"What happened?"

"Kyle Emerson quit."

"He quit?"

Lily nodded. "Yup. He was supposed to come back to work today. I sent the asshole a candy basket even though that was more money on top of what he let get stolen."

"That was nice of you."

"I know. I'm too nice. I hate my employees. No, I hate my ex-employee. The jerk."

"Maybe he was too embarrassed to show his face."

"He wasn't too embarrassed to send a text saying he might sue for his injuries."

"Sue who? The thieves?"

"Me!"

"Get! Out!" I replied with as much indignation as I could muster.

Lily plucked her cell phone off her desk and leaned forwards, turning the screen towards me. There was a simple text message: "
I quit. You're too dangerous to work for. I got injured in the line of duty and I'm gonna sue. Kyle."

"In the line of duty?" I repeated. "Is he for real?"

"Who knows? I contacted my lawyer and he said it's all hot air. Kyle has no grounds to sue us. If anything, I could sue him for not following my rules in light of the bar robberies. You know, I had a bad feeling about him. He's always been kind of a jerk, and Ruby swore she saw him take a bottle of vodka from the stockroom two weeks ago."

"Why did you have a bad feeling about him?"

"Just his attitude. He was nice to the customers, but he always had this kind of entitled way of talking back to me. Like he could run this bar better than I could, and it pissed him off that I owned it and he didn't. I overheard him call me a ‘spoiled, rich brat’ once."

"You are not spoiled!"

"I'm not a brat or rich either. I know my parents help me out from time to time, but I'm paying them back and I have to make this bar work. It sticks in my craw to hear someone trying to reduce me to some preppy, entitled airhead spawned by rich, overbearing parents just because I have fabulous hair and my own business." Lily pulled one blonde curl and it bounced back into the perfect position.

"For what it's worth, I don't think you're any of those things even if you do have rich parents and fabulous hair." Parents, I reminded myself, who were too busy to
attend Lily's wedding. Or anything else Lily did. That was largely the reason my family semi-adopted her while we were in high school. We couldn't bear to think of her all alone in her family's huge house while we were loudly, lovingly, squashed into our own, much smaller one.

"I think we should follow him."

"Why? To see if he's going to consult a lawyer?"

"No. To see if he's behind the robberies. He's just the kind
who thinks stealing is okay."

I eased my foot out of the bucket and poked my big toe. It had a beautiful shade of pink polish across the nail
, but zero feeling. Clearly, I'd iced my foot too long, so I laid it on the towel Lily found for me and wrapped it gently. "Do you think he's smart enough?"

"Not sure. I do think he's enough of a dick to
try
getting away with it."

"Kind of close to home to rob your own bar."

"
My
bar. And he quit. Do you think he could have been one of the men who shot up your date night? There were two of them, right? His partner could have been the same guy pretending to rob him."

"I don't know. Maybe. I guess he's tall enough and
has the right kind of build, but I've never really observed him very closely."

"I checked the employee roster and he was always at work right before those other robberies happened."

"They all happened during off hours, except for yours and the restaurant."

"Yeah, I know, but it means he would always be able to say he was on his way home from work if anyone stopped him
, or asked what he was doing out at that time. He got out of the hospital right before the restaurant was robbed."

"That's a good point, but..." I paused, thinking. Lily's bar had a different MO from all the other robberies. The money
was snatched during the daylight hours and Kyle sustained an injury. There were witnesses. I said as much to Lily, and asked, "Why would he change his pattern?"

"Greed? Maybe he got cocky? Maybe my bar was the last one
they hit, and his injury gave him an excuse to quit and take off without any questions asked?"

I had to agree that th
ose were all valid points, but why Kyle would so brazenly commit a theft from his own place of employment still puzzled me. "It wouldn't hurt to check him out," I decided.

"Check him out?" Lily repeated, slamming her fist down on the desk. "Let's take the bastard down!"

Chapter Ten

I had to
raincheck "taking the bastard down" in order to tackle my actual caseload. Considering Maddox's idea that I should go "back to basics," and Solomon's order to "rest," I headed home and eased my foot onto a soft pillow on the couch. Fortunately, the thin streak of purple across the upper and outer side of my foot told me bruising was minimal, but the unsightly scuff on the edge of my shoe didn't look as promising. I wondered if I could charge a new pair of heels as a professional expense. After all, they got injured while I was on duty.

With my notepad in hand, I made a list of all the things I knew about Nancy since
her arrival in Montgomery, including the places she went and the people she spoke to. It was a short list. One thing I felt sure of was: Joelle knew a lot more than she let on, but apparently, she still wasn't convinced I could help. That made things awkward. I had to hope that she would lead Fletcher to Nancy's location, and soon. More than anything else, I needed to talk to Nancy and find out why she didn't want to be found. Perhaps, I decided, I was talking to the wrong person at Pretty Paws. Perhaps one of the other employees would have been more forthcoming. I reached for my phone and placed a call. "Lucas?"

"At your service," he replied, "sort of."

"Sort of is fine. Can you get me an employee list for Pretty Paws? Maybe from their computer?"

"I can
, but not from their computer since I'm guessing it's fried. I'll try..."

"Don't tell me if it's not legal."

"Do you need anything else?"

"Nope, that's it."

"I'll call you back."

Lucas called ten minutes later with a list of names. I guessed from the
ir surnames that two employees were related to Joelle. I figured, given Joelle's attitude towards me, her family members would be another lost cause. Nancy was also listed. There were three more names, but since Lucas didn't supply me with job titles, I couldn't guess their positions. However, he did provide their last known addresses, so that was something. I resolved to chase them down the next day, after getting an early night and resting my foot some more.

~

I was out the door and parked outside Emily Gates’ home by eight am the next day. My feet were delicately encased in a super cute pair of sky-blue ballet pumps. With my pale pink pants and white blouse, I felt pretty fabulous. I mentally thanked Lily for all those times she forced me to work out at the gym. My abs were tight, my buns were high, and even my arms showed some definition.

Just I was making up my mind about whether to watch the house awhile or approach it, the door opened and a man walked out
. A little kid ran after him and I watched him pick the boy up, swing him around, kiss his head, and deposit him back into the arms of his wife, my target. The woman and little boy waved as the man climbed into his car and took off before the house door closed. I couldn't help smiling at the sweet scene and wondered if one day, I might have a little family of my own.

Before I
indulged that fantasy too long, I walked over and knocked on the door. When Emily opened it, I launched into my identification before explaining, "I need to ask you a few questions about your colleague, Nancy Grant."

"Nancy? Well, sure. Is she okay? I haven't seen her in a few days
, but with the fire and all... Come inside," she invited me, opening the door a little wider so I could step through.

"I think she's fine
, but it's important I find her."

"And you thought I might know
how to?" Emily asked as I followed her to the kitchen. The little boy was perched at the table, eating toast, a half glass of milk next to the plate. The other half of the milk appeared to be on his upper lip and around his mouth. He gave me a milky smile, so I waved.

"I hoped you might."

"She lives in the apartment above Pretty Paws. Well, lived. I guess you heard about the fire?"

I assured her I did and
agreed that it was terrible.

"It was lucky no one was hurt. Apparently
, the other tenants were either not home or got evacuated in time. Do you think Nancy...?" Panic crossed her face.

"No," I shook my head, "We know for sure Nancy wasn't in the apartment when the fire
started."

"Oh, that's a relief."

"How come she had the apartment above the grooming parlor?"

"It was available
, and no one else wanted it. Most of us all have families, you see, so the owner decided to use it as a job incentive. There was a little clause attached, but I guess Nancy didn't mind."

"What kind of clause?"

"Just that she had to keep an eye on the place overnight. Sometimes kids would try to break in. I think they erroneously assumed we were like the vets and might have had drugs on the premises. There's nothing worth stealing anyway."

"So Nancy took the job and the apartment and
acted like their night watchman?"

"Yeah." Emily paused to wipe her son's face and hands
before replacing his plate and cup with a wooden jigsaw puzzle. He handed a piece to me, which was shaped like a tree so I made a show of trying a few wrong shapes before I found the right one and wriggled it into place. His mother gave me an appreciative glance as she rinsed his breakfast dishes.

"What can you tell me about Nancy?"

"In all honesty, not much. She kind of kept to herself. Sometimes, a few of us would take lunch together, especially when it was quiet, but she didn't come along very often. Mostly, she went for a walk at lunch, or hung out with Joelle. That's our receptionist. They seemed friendly, so Joelle might know more than I do."

"Do you know where Nancy walked to?"

"No, only that it couldn't be far because she was never late getting back. She was really eager to help and good with the dogs. Whenever one of us needed to swap a shift, Nancy was always the first person to ask. She was really great like that."

"Do you think she needed the money?"

"I don't know. Maybe. I don't think she had much of a social life, so she must’ve had a lot of free time. I guess she made extra money when she worked one of our shifts."

"Did you ever notice what she spent
her money on? Like, did she come to the store with new bags? Clothes? Books?"

Emily shook her head. "Not that I ever noticed. She seemed pretty frugal."

"What else can you tell me about her?"

"That's it, though..." Emily paused. "It's probably nothing."

"Tell me anyway. It might be more important than you think."

"I don't see how
, but sure. Sometimes, I'd call Nancy's name and she wouldn't turn around until I was pretty much next to her saying, 'hey, Nancy, didn't you hear me?' and she'd make out like she was concentrating, but it did make me wonder more than once if she was hard of hearing. That's not at all helpful, sorry."

"No, I'm happy you mentioned it. Thanks for your time. I really appreciate it."

"If I see Nancy, should I let her know you're looking for her?"

"
Yes, please," I said, handing Emily my card. "And tell her she's not in any trouble. My client just wants to know that she's okay."

I waited until I was back in my VW before I called Solomon. "I tried calling you last night," he said upon answering. "Where were you?"

"Home. I went to bed early and woke up fabulous. What did you do?"

"Spent the evening watching Leo Chandler walk around town."

"Bet you wish you were in my bed."

"You know I do."

"So what did Leo do? Did he commit any crimes?"

"Only if being
too boring were a crime. He just strolled around town, had dinner by himself at Alessandro's and read a book. Then he returned to his hotel."

"That confirms it. He's a master of evil."

"He'll slip up, eventually. They always do."

"Speaking of which
, I just interviewed one of Nancy's colleagues. Do we have anything on file about her being hearing impaired?"

"Not that I recall."

"Me neither. Did Fletcher get any luck with Joelle?"

"Nope. She hasn't left her apartment since your run-in with her. Delgado took over an hour ago."

"I'll check in with him soon."

"By phone. We don't want to spook Joelle. What's your next move?"

"I'm going to interrogate two more Pretty Paws employees; then I promised Lily I'd help with surveillance on her ex-employee."

"What for?" asked Solomon. "This your pro
bono thing?"

"Uh-huh. She thinks he's behind all the
bar and restaurant robberies."

Solomon sighed. "Seriously?"

"Yep. And, you know, she's got good reasons to think he might have something to do with them. He flouted her rules for depositing the bar's takings, he's the only real witness to Lily's robbery, and his shift ended right before every robbery took place, except the restaurant, which occurred after he was released from hospital. He's the right height and build for the our date night robbery too."

"Well, have fun with that," said Solomon, not sounding at all worried. There was only
one reason he wouldn't be worried about Lily and me following around armed thieves: if he strongly doubted that Kyle was involved. Fortunately, I had to send a quiet, telepathic agreement. "Let me know if either of you get kidnapped and need rescuing."

"Will do," I promised.

"Can you solve the case by three pm?"

"Maybe."

"Good. I called a meeting with Leo at four. It would be good to run though what we've found so far and watch his reactions. I'd like to go over your case notes, and we'll drip feed a few things to him."

"Might be hard to weed out a few things from not a lot."

"Maybe you'll know more by three. Don't get kidnapped!"

After promising
I wouldn't, I said a few really mushy things that didn't bear repeating before I hung up. I stuck the car in drive and headed a few miles east to my next target. That meeting didn't bear fruit. Not only had the employee worked at Pretty Paws for scarcely a month, but she also barely seemed to know who Nancy was. After leaving her with my card, and the usual instructions to contact me if she heard anything, I hightailed it over to my final employee interview.

"Yeah, sure
, I know Nancy. Nice girl," said Manny, the only male employee of Pretty Paws, after I gave him my spiel. He wore a Pretty Paws t-shirt with jeans and sneakers and seemed to be in his mid-twenties. He was clean-shaven and his hair was styled just so. He was cute. My life was so hard. "Why are you looking for her again?"

"Just to make sure she's okay and to reunite her with my client."

"Sweet. I wish I could help, but I don't know where she is."

"Do you know
of anywhere she might be?"

"She's tight with Joelle. She m
ay know, but I'm not comfortable giving you Joelle’s address without her permission."

"No problem," I replied, since I had it already. I
also didn't mention that my colleague had his eyes glued to her building. I doubted it would make Manny feel more comfortable. "Did Nancy mention any other friends close by that she might be staying with? Possibly out of state?"

"Not to me
, but I really didn't get to know her all that well. She kept to herself, if you know what I mean."

I assured him I did
, but I didn't think he was really listening as he carried on. "You know, she was always kind of cagey. Like, I asked her once if she had a boyfriend and she snapped at me; and then another time, I asked her about her family, and she just switched topics. It was like she didn't want anyone to know anything personal about her."

"Maybe she didn't. Did she tell you anything
at all about herself?"

"Now
that I think about it, not really. Actually, there was this one thing..." Manny paused, wrinkling his nose like he was thinking very hard.

"Go on..."

Manny sighed. "It was probably nothing, but I overheard her talking on the phone once. She was in the break room and I needed my spare clippers for this giant poodle that came in. I don't think she realized I was in there... anyway, she said something like, ‘no, everyone knows me as Nancy here’ and then something like, ‘I know, I know, but it was the only name I could think of that no one would look for.’ Then she saw me and looked terrified, so I just, you know, asked her if she’d seen my clippers and pretended I didn't hear anything. That's weird, isn't it?"

I
agreed that it was weird and asked a few more questions, but Manny didn't know anything else. He did offer me a future discount on any dog grooming since he planned to set up his own mobile business. I took his business card, deciding to give it to my neighbor for his dog, and left him with my own card.