She rolled to her back and rubbed her temple. “What do you mean? I need to money to pay my rent, my car payment, my groceries—”
“But you already pay for all of that now,” her mom interrupted. “What do you need
more
for?”
She heard a pan clatter on top of the stove as she thought about her question. She needed more to
have
it.
“Savings,” Morgan said. “In case.”
“In case of what?” Mindy asked.
“Mom,” Morgan said, finally frustrated. “You of all people should know what I’m talking about. I learned this from you. Don’t spend it if you don’t have it, have a back-up plan, maybe two.”
Things were quiet on the other end of the phone. Finally Mindy said, “I guess I did tell you girls that. But, Morgan, I don’t want you to work just for the sake of money, to have more than you need just to have it.”
“You did,” Morgan said. “You worked your tail off just to be sure we had enough.”
“
Enough
,” her mom emphasized. “Not more than enough.”
“You did too,” Morgan protested. “In case Daddy did something spontaneous.”
“But I loved those things,” her mom said. “I wanted him to be able to do them, so I worked harder.”
“You did
not
love them!” Morgan got up and started pacing. “You cried, you yelled, you fought.”
There was a long, horrible pause on Mindy’s end of the phone and Morgan felt her chest tighten even before her mom said, “Is that all you remember?”
Morgan stomped to the window to look out over San Francisco and thought about her mother’s question. What did she remember?
“I remember the fights and tears,” she finally said. “I remember loving and dreading Daddy’s surprises at the same time. They were so fun but I always knew there’d be hell to pay.”
Mindy cleared her throat. “I felt the same way.” She paused, then said, “We were so young when we had you girls. We didn’t know what we were doing and yeah, we didn’t have a lot of money. But,” she said firmly, “we always had enough. The tears and fighting…” She took a deep breath. “I’m sorry that’s what you remember. They happened, but not all the time. We had lots of laughs, lots of great times. The tears were…” Her voice got scratchy.
Morgan lowered herself onto the foot stool by the chair near the window. “What were the tears, Mom?” she asked. This felt important.
“The tears were jealousy.” Mindy laughed and sniffed at the same time. “Your dad was you girls’ favorite. He was fun and silly and got to be there with you all the time while I worked.”
Morgan frowned. “It had to be frustrating to be the only one who worked.”
“No,” her mom said quickly. She laughed lightly. “He was
there
, Morgan. Always. No matter what any of us needed he was there. If you were sick, he could stay with you. If you had a party at school, he could be there. I made the cupcakes, but he was there. That matters so much more.”
Morgan thought about that. It was like Doug had said, sometimes you have to
be
the solution. She remembered her dad coming to her school parties. He was always in charge of games. She remembered some of the goofy stuff he had them do, how he’d get all the kids laughing and playing, even the shy ones. She didn’t remember a single cupcake.
She took a deep breath. Okay, being there was good.
“But if he’d worked, you could have been there sometimes too,” she said.
“Oh, honey.” Her mom sighed. “Part of me wanted to, but as long as he was there I didn’t feel guilty or worry. I was determined to finish nursing school, get my master’s and move up at the hospital into administration.”
Which she’d done.
“It all took time and commitment. I had to work long hours and crazy shifts for a while. But after everyone told me I’d ruined my life and my chance at anything good by getting pregnant and married so young, I had to prove them wrong. I wanted to show them all that your dad and I could make it. He helped me do all those professional things I wanted to do and still raise two happy, healthy, well-adjusted daughters.” Mindy chuckled. “We had Maddie so soon after you to prove a point to everyone. It would have been easier and
cheaper
to wait, but we knew we could do it.”
“So it was all…okay?” Morgan asked, a little stunned.
“Very okay,” her mom said. “You saw tears and heard arguments, sure. Those came from fatigue and being young and jealous and sometimes guilty. Sometimes things were tight, but your dad always insisted everything would be all right and…it always was. That’s why he kept doing that stuff even when we fought. Now you have a thousand great memories having nothing to do with how nice our house or car was or if we had to eat tuna casserole once a week.”
Tears were tracking down her cheeks by the time her mom finished.
She was completely right.
Morgan knew then she’d trade her entire savings in for tuna casserole once a week.
And that was exactly what she was going to do.
Chapter Eleven
“I think she’s stalking me.”
Sara looked up from where she was playing with Ava, Jessica and Ben’s daughter. “Morgan’s stalking you?”
“Yeah.”
Danika burst into laughter from where she was hanging photos near the fireplace.
Sara was grinning too. “Why do you think that?”
“I saw her driving away from Jeni’s house the other day when I stopped by there. I saw her coming out of the Youth Center Monday when I got there and I think she was at my house last night.”
“How do you know she was at your house?” Sara asked, handing Ava another block to stack.
Dooley noted neither woman was denying Morgan had been at any of those places. “I found leftover chicken and noodles in the fridge this morning and brownies on the counter.”
Dani and Sara shared a look.
“What?” He sat up quickly.
“You think she’s stalking you?” Dani asked, hand on her hip, her pregnant belly starting to show. “Even though she’s never where you are at the same time you’re there?”
“If she’s stalking you, she’s not very good at it,” Sara said.
Dooley slumped back on the couch. Dammit. He wanted her to be stalking him. Or at least thinking about him.
“You don’t seem surprised by the idea she’s been at my sister’s or the Center or
my
house,” he said.
Sara wouldn’t lie to him.
“I’m not surprised,” Sara said. “I know she’s been at all those places. On a regular basis,” she added with a sly smile.
“She’s been with you all?” He wondered why
he
wasn’t more surprised. These were his friends, his family, his activities.
But if she wanted to be close to him, that was one way. He’d been tempted to just go and sit in the lobby of the Britton himself, just to be near people and things that were close to her.
“We went shopping Saturday,” Dani said.
Sara had perked up. “Where’d she take you?”
“All over. But we spent most of the time in the shoe store. She got this amazing pair of…”
From there Dooley tuned out. He didn’t know a damned thing about women’s shoes except how they looked once they were on, and he didn’t care. But he’d lost Sara. Sara wouldn’t change her alliance easily, but shoes were serious.
“I saw Morgan in the dressing room between outfits,” Danika said to him. “
Damn
.”
He shifted uncomfortably on the couch. Yeah, that about summed Morgan up when she was naked. Even when she wasn’t.
So, she was around, in Omaha, in his life. Kind of. It was weird. She was in the lives and activities and places that made up his life but she wasn’t
in
his life. Not like he wanted her to be. But she was moving to California soon so… Unless…
He sat up again. “Did she get the California job?”
Sara looked at him, then at Danika, then back to him. “Yeah, she did.”
Of course she did. “I figured,” he said, his chest heavy.
“You did?” Sara asked.
“She’s great at her job. It’s the most important thing to her,” he said.
There was a beat of silence, before Dani said, “You’re an idiot.” Then returned to pounding nails. Loudly.
It was interesting, he mused. Danika was the first to say that.
Later that night, Dooley sat in the break room at work and tossed popcorn into his mouth with fake nonchalance. It was quiet. Very quiet. Too quiet.
He’d screwed up with a woman they all liked. Where were the opinions, the advice, the you’re-an-idiot comments?
He looked around. He’d been waiting for them to say something, to ask something, to yell at him, for four shifts now. But Sam sat at the desk working a Sudoku puzzle, Kevin was reading and Mac was, apparently, watching whatever Dooley was pretending to watch on TV.
There were no comments or questions. Nothing. Even Dani and Sara had let it go after the one comment.
He scowled at the TV and chewed harder. In the past when Sam and Mac had been idiots about Dani and Sara they’d all made sure the guys knew how they all felt. They’d all known Sam belonged with Dani and they’d made sure he faced how he felt. Dooley, in particular, had seen how Mac was screwing up with Sara and he’d been sure to let Mac know.
Because he cared about them and wanted them to be happy.
So what the hell was this?
Did they think Morgan wasn’t the right woman for him? They were stupid if they thought that. She was definitely the right woman. Did they think he didn’t love her? That was even more ridiculous. He’d never felt, or acted, this way for anyone else. What did they think
that
was? Was it that he wasn’t good enough for her? That was… Well, that was possible.
“Dammit, I thought you were my friends,” he finally said, smacking the arm of his chair with his open palm.
Mac reached for a handful of popcorn, seemingly unfazed by Dooley’s outburst. “Hey, man, we’re good as long as you don’t cry or sing.”
Dooley raised an eyebrow. “If I did, real
friends
would sit through it.”
Mac seemed to think about that for a moment. “’Wind Beneath My Wings’? I’m not sitting through that. Unless I had my phone so I could record it and put it on YouTube.”
“How about ‘Lean On Me’?” Sam piped up. “That’s a good one.”
“Okay, I might listen to that,” Mac said.
“Or ‘Friends in Low Places’,” Sam said.
Dooley groaned. Country music gave him hives.
“At least go with the Beatles,” Kevin said and launched into “With a Little Help from My Friends.”
Dooley waited as Mac and Sam joined in for a verse. When they finally shut up he asked, “None of you are concerned about it at all?”
“Concerned about what?” Mac asked, tossing popcorn into his mouth. “Sam’s singing voice has always sucked.”
“Oh, yeah, and you’re
American Idol
material,” Sam said.
“Me and Morgan breaking up,” Dooley said through gritted teeth. Seriously? Why did he hang out with these guys?
“Oh, that,” Mac said.
Dooley waited. No one said anything more. “Yes, fucking
that
. Where’s the ‘hey, sorry buddy’ or the ‘I’ve got a cute girl you should meet’ or the ‘what the hell are you thinking’? You’ve got
nothing
to say about it at all?” he demanded.
Sam shrugged indifferently. “We figured you knew what you were doing.”
Dooley scowled at them. “Since when has
anyone
in this room known what they were doing where a woman was concerned?”
They all looked at one another, unable to answer that particular question.
“So knock that shit off,” Dooley ordered.
“Okay,” Mac said. “Basically you’re saying you don’t know what you’re doing breaking up with Morgan.”
“Yes,” Dooley said without hesitation.
“Why? You know you were right to break it off,” Sam said. “You’re just missing the sex.”
Dooley stared at him. “I am not just missing the sex.” As he said it he knew it was true with every cell of his body. Though he did miss Morgan’s body there was a hell of a bigger void than that.
Mac didn’t look convinced. “Really? Sex is a powerful drug.”
“It wasn’t just sex.”
“You sure?” Sam asked. “I mean, like, what else do you miss?”
Dooley thought about that. “Everything,” he finally said. “Her voice, her laugh, the feel of her skin, watching her across a room, knowing how she is.”
“Hmm,” Mac said thoughtfully. “Could be the liquor.”
“What liquor?” Dooley asked.
“The liquor you’re drinking every night because you miss the sex.”
Dooley shook his head and forced himself to breathe deep. “I am not drinking every night.”
“Maybe you should,” Mac said with a shrug.
Dooley wanted to hit him. Too bad Mac was bigger than he was. Sam he could maybe take, but not Mac. Or Kevin. “I miss the sex,” he finally said patiently. “But I miss a lot more than that.”
“Why?” Sam asked. “She was stuck up. Too hoity-toity.”
“Did you just say hoity-toity?” Mac asked him.
“It’s accurate,” Sam said. “Expensive tastes. Couldn’t be bothered with Dooley’s dad.”
“Yeah, the minute she tried to hire that weird guy to stay with Senior I was over her,” Mac added.
Dooley felt his mouth open but nothing came out. He frowned. He thought these guys liked Morgan. “You were
over
her?” he finally asked.
He knew Mac wasn’t in love with her but damn, he didn’t see how anyone could ever be
over
Morgan.
“Come on,” Mac said. “It’s obvious you have everything handled. Who is she to come in like that and try to change everything up?”
He knew it seemed that way. It seemed that way to him too. But hearing someone else say it, it felt wrong. “She was trying to make it work with us.”
“I just can’t figure out why she doesn’t like your dad. He’s awesome,” Sam said.
Dooley frowned at him. “She likes my dad.”
Sam raised an eyebrow. “You sure about that?”
Dooley’s frown tightened. “Of course I’m sure.”
“How do you know? At the first opportunity she wanted to bring someone else in to take over so she could take you out of town.”
“That’s not how it was,” Dooley said firmly. “It was for work. It was only for a few days and…”