Inner Diva (6 page)

“Sorry about that,” he began, but she
interrupted him before he could continue.

“About what?” Her alarm at his contact was
evident, and Carlos realized he’d now touched her twice and she’d
had the same reaction both times.

When he touched her in reality, she shuddered
with alarm. In his daydreams, she shuddered with pleasure.

“I was rude when you came in. I didn’t mean
to be. Let me try it again. Hello, Monica.”

She scrutinized his face, giving him a look
of confusion. Then, her lips curved up. “Hello, Carlos.”

His own smile came naturally. “How was your
day today?”

She seemed to falter. “You don’t want to
know.”

“I don’t?” If she intended it as a jab, he
probably deserved it. “Actually, I do. Bad day?”

She studied him as he slid into the chair
beside her so she wouldn’t have to twist her neck to see him.
“Yeah. You could say that.”

“You’re some sort of executive, aren’t you?”
He bet however bad a day could get while sitting in an office
didn’t come close to a bad day at his job.

She snorted. “An executive? What gave you
that idea?”

He considered the question. “I heard you had
a good job and I figured because you’re so smart and all, you must
be the boss.”

Luisa looked up from her paper. “Monica’s
very smart. She knows all the answers to my homework.”

Monica reached over and ruffled her hair.
“Knowing all the answers to fifth grade homework doesn’t
necessarily make me smart. And no, I’m definitely not an
executive.”

Carlos shrugged. “So what do you do?”

“On days like today, I mainly just screw up.”
She gave a sad smile before turning back to Luisa.

“I don’t believe that,” he persisted, and he
earned another surprised look from her.

“I’m done! Time for the park, Monica?” Luisa
brandished her paper and held it high in the air. Monica grabbed it
and glanced over the answers. She held up her hand, which Luisa
slapped.

“Great job. Sure, it’s time to play.” She
turned to him. “I thought we’d just walk down to that playground a
few blocks away.”

He nodded. “On Highpoint Avenue?”

“That’s the one.” She gave him a cautious
scrutiny, her eyebrows hiding in her bangs.

“Let’s do it.” He couldn’t tell if she was
happy he was coming, or just happy he hadn’t fought it.

They bundled into jackets and the girls added
scarves and gloves. They hiked the couple blocks to the playground.
He parked himself on the picnic table while Monica pushed Luisa on
the swing. Quick bursts of steam accompanied each bit of laughter
and speech between them. Their cheeks were getting red from the
early December chill, but it wasn’t too cold.

He had an idea and called to them, “Give me
ten minutes. I’ll be back.”

They both nodded and waved and he headed
across the street to the coffee shop on the corner. He bought two
coffees and a hot chocolate. Not sure how she liked her coffee, or
even if she liked coffee, he put cream and some sweetener in it and
carried the cups back to the playground.

When they saw him approach he waved them over
to the table and handed out the steaming cups. “Slowly, you know,
hermana,
” he reminded Luisa as she squealed at the hot
chocolate. She nodded and blew carefully on her drink before taking
a cautious sip and smiling her appreciation at him.

He paused with Monica’s cup in his hand. “I
wasn’t sure if you liked coffee, but I thought I’d take a
chance.”

“That’s very nice of you, thank you.” She
wrapped her hands around the cup, gathering its warmth into her
gloved fingers. She took a sip. Carlos walked to a nearby picnic
table and hoisted himself up to sit on the tabletop.

Then, she moaned. Carlos yanked his mouth
from his coffee cup and stared at her. Her face twisted in
pleasure, her eyes barely open, and her mouth full of hot java.

This was definitely a woman who wasn’t afraid
to react to things that pleasured her. Would he love to pleasure
her in his own way and see just how she reacted.

She opened her eyes, swallowed the coffee and
smiled at him. “It’s perfect.”

Uh huh.

“It’s just how I like it. Half and half, and
two sweeteners, right?”

She was waiting for a response so he’d better
clean his mind up and answer her. “Yeah.”

“I thought so.” They drank in silence until
Luisa finished her hot chocolate, spotted a friend on the see-saw
and ran off to join her. They watched her play.

“So, tell me about this bad day of
yours.”

She took a long drag on the coffee, then
swallowed it. She studied him long and hard before she said,
“Really?”

He nodded.

“Why do you want to know?” She stood a few
paces away from him, her tone wary, cautious.

“Look, I know you think I’m a real hard ass
because I’ve given you trouble when it comes to Luisa. But I have
to admit you’re really good with her. She’s crazy about you
already. So I figured the least I can do is get to know you
better.”

She stood motionless for a moment, then took
a few steps toward him. She climbed onto the top of the picnic
table, and sat beside him. He inhaled her fragrance – something
floral and sweet.

“I manage a community theater. I’m sort of a
one-woman show because I have the only paid position in a
non-profit organization staffed with volunteers. ” she said, her
voice soft.

“Wow.” He was right, then. She must be
successful, not to mention creative and smart.

“Oh, believe me, it’s got its ups and downs
like any job. But for the most part, I like it. Usually I either
work independently on behind the scenes stuff or I have a group of
volunteers reporting to me to accomplish some task. Pretty low
stress.” After another sip, she sighed. “But I really blew it
today.”

Somehow he couldn’t imagine her blowing
anything and he told her so.

She looked at him and her glance hovered on
his lips, his cheeks and then his eyes. “No, I screwed up on a
presentation to our Board of Directors and if I don’t pull this
around, I’m afraid my reputation will suffer.”

She sat quietly for a moment, and he realized
he really wanted to hear what was on her mind – what a slice of her
work life looked like. He waited.

“I led a team of volunteers charged with
coming up with a complete advertising campaign for the theater for
next year. The Board was considering quite an outlay of dollars,
hoping the advertising would bring in new audience members. The
team and I met for weeks, and I had people assigned to each aspect
of the project. We came up with some really super ideas. We were
all pleased.”

Carlos nodded.

“Today was our presentation to the Board for
their approval. The team asked me to be the presenter, to get the
Board excited about what we’d created. I took everything we came up
with and organized it into three separate formats – one for
newspapers, one for TV and one for radio. Then I put together an
electronic presentation highlighting all three. I was so ready. I
stayed up late every night for two weeks, determined to make this
ad presentation the best it could be.”

Monica leaned back on the tabletop, her arms
behind her to balance and her legs stretched out front. “But, they
caught me off guard in the meeting. My mind was elsewhere, and by
the time I went up front I was nervous, my hands were shaking, and
I dropped my computer.”

“With the presentation on it.”

“That’s right. And I didn’t have a backup.
That was stupid enough. Then I had to come up with a Plan B, and
kept them waiting while I had paper copies made, and then stumbled
through the presentation.”

He nodded. Sounded like a hell of a lot of
pressure. More than he ever had to deal with at work. He gave a low
whistle. “So how did it go after that?”

“Mediocre. I could tell the Chairman of the
Board wasn’t particularly happy with me. She thinks I was
unprofessional and probably questions whether I should lead another
creative team.” She sighed and shook her head. “She’s probably
right.”

He shifted on the tabletop so that he faced
her. Pushing away a feeling that he shouldn’t, he took her hands in
his, forcing her to look his way. “I’m sure it was fine. Don’t be
upset with yourself. I mean, they’re not going to fire you,
right?”

Monica stared at their joined hands. She
paused for a moment longer, then shook her head. “I don’t think so.
But I’m sure I blew the theater’s chance to benefit from all that
great advertising. The Board may not approve the expenditure now.
My team deserves so much better than that.”

He blinked and realized how much he wanted to
make her feel better. Someone this accomplished, this intelligent,
this giving of herself to others, shouldn’t feel bad because she
made a mistake. “I bet it wasn’t nearly as bad as you think. I bet
the quality of the ideas came through, despite the unexpected
detour of the presentation.”

“I suppose, but …” She shrugged.

At that moment, Monica lurched forward and
bumped her shoulder into his chest. He caught her, pulling her
close. “What the…?” Then he saw it – a kid missed the Frisbee
thrown at him, and it had sailed into Monica’s back, knocking her
off balance.

“Sorry!” The kid trotted up, grabbed the
plastic disc and raced off with it.

Leaving the two of them planted on the top of
the picnic table, him holding onto her like there was no tomorrow,
and her looking up expectantly, her lips less than an inch from
his. He really should release her. But when God, or whoever else
was looking out for him, handed him an opportunity like this, he
wasn’t about to let it pass without …

He lowered his head and brushed his lips
gently over hers. He pulled back just enough to catch her startled
gaze and then covered her mouth firmly with his. He had no idea how
she’d react and frankly, at this moment he didn’t care. He’d been
thinking about this woman non-stop, and he needed to get her out of
his mind. Maybe if he made a move on her and she slapped him or
pushed him away, it would give him the impetus to walk away and not
look back. Emboldened, he deepened the kiss, twisting his neck to
get a better angle on her lips and closed his eyes so he could
concentrate on the feel of his lips on hers – the full, gorgeous
lips he’d been dreaming about all week.

But if he was expecting resistance, it didn’t
come. Monica returned the kiss, seemed to have no intentions of
stopping it. He cupped her cheek with his hand and let his fingers
trail over her satin-soft face.

As a reward, he heard a faint moan come from
deep in her throat. The warmth their joined lips generated seared
through him, heating them in the midst of the brisk evening air.
She surprised him with her response – she wasn’t modest or shy. She
gripped his shirt with her gloved fingers, pulling him closer.
Still conjoined, she ripped off a glove and returned her bare
fingers to the spot where his shirt collar exposed his neck.

He shivered at the skin-on-skin contact and
broke his hold on her lips just long enough to place a kiss on her
cheek and her eyelid before returning to the sweet heat of her
mouth. She caressed his neck, her fingers moving softly over his
skin in small circles and a shot of heated desire plummeted
directly to his groin. He shuddered at the intensity of it and she
pushed his collar away and moved her hand further into his shirt to
caress his collarbone.

Now it was his turn to groan and the sound
seemed to encourage her to make the kiss deeper, reaching for more
contact, more warmth, more heat. He was not a stranger to kissing,
but this was no ordinary kiss. And no ordinary woman.

Suddenly, she gasped and pulled away. She
scooted back, her breath coming in ragged pants. She lifted her
hand – those same fingers that had driven him crazy with their
meanderings – and pushed the hair out of her face. “I’m sorry,” she
murmured. “I don’t know …”

He shook his head. “I’m not. I’m not sorry at
all.”

She stood, her hands holding her head as if
to ward off a headache. “I can’t believe I … I didn’t mean …”

He jumped off the table and put his hands on
her shoulders. “Don’t worry. I started it.”

She looked away, avoiding his eyes. Luisa ran
up, ready to leave. Monica turned her back to him, put her arm on
Luisa’s shoulder and walked a few steps away.

So much for getting her out of his mind. No,
now she was branded there.

Chapter Four

The next night, Monica gathered her script,
along with her nerves, and emerged from the back to stand center
stage. Her pages, marked weeks ago with green highlights of prop
instructions were now enhanced with yellow highlights of Victoria’s
lines. Victoria, the lead female character. Victoria, Trina’s
part.

It was difficult not to put a great sense of
importance on this event – being named Trina’s understudy. A casual
edict from Dave, the director when she’d approached him, “Sure, we
need an understudy. Why don’t you do it?” belied the gravity of
what he’d granted her. It was a chance to follow her dream.

Her heart raced as she stood on the stage,
looking out over the hundreds of empty seats, all lined in neat
rows, ready to host a small army of theater-goers anticipating a
night of live entertainment, that amazing pleasure created by an
ensemble of actors combined with talent, preparation and magic. The
thought of failing terrified her. Lined up with the other actors in
the lobby after the show, she dreaded shaking hands as audience
members left, their looks of disappointment in her performance that
fell short.

It was easier to hide in the back, her props,
sets and the darkness rescuing her from public scrutiny.

Until now. Why now, did she talk to Dave and
reveal her dream of being onstage? Her pulse raced through her
veins, her breath coming shallower. A tingle of lightheadedness
invaded her.