Infinite (9 page)

Apparently having found whatever he was looking for, Logan parked along the curb in front of a beautiful two-story home. More puzzled than ever, I glanced around, searching for any clue about our location. I suddenly wished breakfast had included a mimosa, because if he was about to reveal a secret lovechild, I was nowhere near prepared.

Logan was eerily quiet, just holding my hand and rubbing his thumb along my knuckles.

“Logan, w…what are we doing?”

“This side, sweetheart.” He pointed out his window at the house across the street, which was much smaller but just as nice. “Just wait, and you’ll see.”

And finally, I did see, icy realization moving over me in an unsettling cloak. There, on the opposite side of the road, a man worked in front of his house, unloading rocks from the back of his truck for the cactus/flower bed.

But it wasn’t just any man. It was my father.

“How? W-why?” I stammered, the words choking me.

Logan stared at me, his next words soft and gentle. “To give
you
the upper hand—the option.”

I couldn’t properly process what I was seeing. My eyes were wide, and sharp, painful tears filled them. Logan had somehow managed to steal away and track down my father—the man who’d walked away from my mother and me so many years ago…with my babysitter.

“What…” I wiped my escaping tears. “What do you expect me to do?” I whispered, terrified of his answer.

“Nothing. Anything. Whatever you want, sweetheart.” He maneuvered in his seat to better look at me, giving me his full attention. “You have a chance, if you want to take it, to get answers. You don’t have to wonder; the option is yours. When we start our lives together, I want you looking forward, not back.”

His intentions were good—thoughtful and selfless—but…

“Do…should I…go talk to him?”

He leaned in, pulling my gaze from my father to him.

“Only if that’s what
you
want to do. And I’ll sit right here, or stand right beside you. Again, this is
your
decision.”

I watched my father, Martin, lift the bottom of his Hawaiian shirt to wipe sweat from his face before heaving another rock onto one shoulder. It was all very domestic—the complete opposite of how I remembered him. He was a man taking care of his home…a home he possibly lived in with a family. Or maybe he was a bachelor. Maybe the babysitter ran off on him, just like he’d done to us.

But after one more look around, the analytical part of my brain kicked in to tell me that answer. You don’t live in a neighborhood full of bicycles and lawn gnomes if you’re a middle-aged single man.

Moments later, my assumption was confirmed when Nina, my old babysitter—the woman who’d tempted him away from his original family, and was still just as pretty as she was at 18—walked outside to hand him a large cup.

“That’s Nina,” I explained to Logan. “Guess there’s something to be said for the fact that they’re still together.”

“How’s that?”

“Well, at least he didn’t leave us for some passing whimsy. Seems she really is who he was meant to be with.” It wasn’t much, but it did make me feel better.

“Oh, God,” I said suddenly, ducking down in my seat. “Were they waving?” My stomach rolled. “Can they see us? Get down!” I whispered.

Logan chuckled. “They wouldn’t recognize me, and the windows are too dark to see us anyway, sweetheart.”

“Right,” I said quietly, releasing a long breath.

“You know you don’t need to whisper, right?”

I swatted his chest.

“Besides, they weren’t waving at us,” Logan added, staring out the window again. “Have a look.”

Slowly, I sat back up in my seat and took in the Hallmark-card scene in front of me. They were waving at two boys who were around ten or eleven years old and looked like twins, walking down the sidewalk from a neighbor’s house. The way Nina pulled them in for hugs and Martin laughed at something they said left no doubt who they were.

Apparently, I had a set of twin half-brothers. But for some reason, my heart shifted right then and there. Watching it all unfold, I didn’t pity myself. Everything happened for a reason. My mother found a man she loved, George, and they’d be married next. I was sure of it. My father was just that, a father. He was no longer my dad, because his new family needed him more.

I leaned over and rested my head on Logan’s shoulder, watching my father as I thought about his world and what he’d created. I was happy enough for him, because I had a world of my own that I loved and wouldn’t change for anything.

I had my own little boy, Oliver, whom I wanted to be waiting to greet every day. I had the house, lawn, and family
I
wanted to take care of. I already had the only people I needed. And before I knew it was happening, that empty place my father had left in my heart closed, burying the snapshot of his new life deep inside.

“Sweetheart?” Logan squeezed my hand, gathering me from my thoughts. “What do you want to do?”

With my mind made up and heart content, I cupped both his stubble-covered cheeks in my hands.

“Thank you for giving me this, but it’s all I needed. You and Oliver are my life now, and I couldn’t be happier.”

“You sure?”

“Absolutely.” I nodded. “Take me home, Logan.”

Chapter 13

I stood upstairs in my wedding gown that Saturday afternoon, looking out the window at the very spot on my grandparents’ land where we’d be getting married, right in front of the treehouse. I couldn’t help but think how it was the exact same view Logan had all those times I’d turned to catch him watching me. The weight of his stare had been undeniable.

I hadn’t seen him yet that day; he had insisted on all the traditions of a wedding, knowing how much it meant to me, and so had spent the night before in the room above Haven. And I knew we wouldn’t be seeing each other until I walked down the aisle and my mother gave me away to him.

Guests were arriving and being greeted by both Blythe and Logan’s father, Edward. From what Julia had explained, Edward had made a check out to Oliver’s college fund when Logan refused his financial help with the wedding.

Logan was extremely blessed to have such amazing parents. Regardless of whether they were married, they loved their children. And after all Blythe and Julia had done for me, a girls’ day at the spa would be my treat to them soon. Though Julia was busy being in college, she’d managed to plan, rearrange, and navigate us all through Quinn being born early (not to mention as a boy instead of a girl), as well as two last-minute weddings. She was remarkable, and I couldn’t have been happier that she’d be my sister-in-law soon.

I just wished my soon-to-be brother-in-law, Jax, would’ve made an appearance. For Logan.

Luckily, Oliver timed his entrance perfectly to save me from dwelling on the melancholy thought for too long. He ran into the room, excited and yelling.

“Cassie, picture time!” He paused. “Wow,” he breathed out, his eyes wide. “You look pretty.
Really
pretty.”

“Why, thank you,” I giggled, so in love with the little gentleman.

“Let’s go! We gotta take pictures.”

“Oliver, honey?”

My mom entered the room, looking beautiful in her cream lace pantsuit. She wasn’t the dress-wearing type, but had managed to fancy herself up just for me. “Why don’t you run down and tell Hilary and Julia we’ll be there in a minute?”

Oliver agreed easily and scampered off, leaving my mother and me alone.

“You look beautiful, Cassandra,” my mom said, already tearing up as she sat beside me on the small sofa.

“Thank you for being here and for supporting me more than anyone else.”

“That’s my job. And there’s never been an easier one, because you’ve always been the sweetest girl.” She took my hand. “I love you, and I couldn’t be prouder. Logan’s a good man, and I already consider Oliver my first grandchild. Love that boy to pieces. Anything you guys ever need, I’m here.”

“We know that, and appreciate it.”

The smile she returned was heart-wrenching, and her eyes were distant. “I’m sure you’re missing your grandparents more than ever today, but they’re here in spirit. And they’d love your new family as much as I do.”

“I do wish they were here, but that’s life,” was all I said, a silent tear falling down my face.

“Logan called me a few days ago and asked for information on your father. Not sure what he’s planning to do with it, but I’ll support you if you want to find him. I never wanted you to grow up without a man in your life. I’m sorry how things worked out, and I know he’d be proud of you too.”

My crooked smile was bittersweet, my throat clenching as I searched for the right words that desperately needed to be spoken. “Logan already found him.”

Her stunned expression spoke volumes of the pain she held for the man she’d let go of so many years ago—the man she rarely spoke of to me.

“I see.” She released my hand, nervously entwining both her own over and over again in her lap, unable to look at me as she continued. “Figured it wouldn’t take him long.”

Finally, her eyes drifted up to meet mine. They looked watery and lost. “So, did you speak with him—your dad?”

I shook my head, more tears falling over my cheeks. “No. Didn’t need to.”

“You deserve a chance at closure. To hear his side…maybe start rebuilding a relationship there.”

My head shook in disagreement. “No. He has his own family now, and I have mine, including you. There’s nothing there I’m interested in. You’ve always been my mother
and
my father, and never once did you let me down. And that’s why I want it to be you who walks me down the aisle and gives me to the only man I’ll ever truly depend on.”

With no words needed, my mother hugged me close before Hilary raced in, ending the moment. Honestly, it was for the best—my makeup may have been considered waterproof, but I was seriously pushing the limits with all the crying.

“We need you for pics or they’re not happening until after, and as much as I want to stick around for those and the reception, I…” She bit her lip, stopping herself short.

“I know you have a baby to get back to.”

“I’m a bitch. Sorry.” Her shoulders sank with the obvious weight of guilt.

My mother gave a short laugh, already slipping past Hilary and out the door.

“No, you’re a new mom who just left her son for the first time. I get it, and I love how devoted you are.”

Hilary gave me a hug and left the room. I grabbed my bouquet and stopped in front of the full-length mirror one last time, first to confirm that my mascara was exactly where it should be and not running down my cheeks. And secondly, to take in the present image of myself, all grown up and ready for the next step in the direction of the rest of my life.

I was grateful my mom had such a level head and steadying grip, because that was the only way I made it down the aisle.

In a daze, I’d have sworn I floated to the man waiting under the flowered arch. With his dark hair perfectly styled, fitted black tux, strong shaven jaw, and adoring smile, Logan stole my breath and every last one of my rational thoughts.

“You’re beautiful,” he mouthed, and my pulse skittered. It was all too absolutely fantastic to be true. It had to be a dream—one from which I never wanted to wake. But deep down, I knew it was real. I was actually about to marry the gorgeous man gazing at me as if I were the only woman on Earth.

“Cass, flowers,” Hilary mumbled under her breath, breaking my trance. “Hand me your flowers,” she repeated when I stared at her dumbly.

I had no idea what happened between that and the moment the minister asked Logan to repeat after him. My soon-to-be husband stared deeply into my eyes as he vowed to hold, honor, and love me for the rest of his life. And as I did the same, I caught the slightest tear creep up in the corner of his eye. It never fell, but knowing it was there—that this moment meant as much to him as it did to me—was more than I could ever have asked for.

Then, with Logan’s help, I went down on my haunches in the most ladylike fashion possible while wearing a wedding gown and crooked my finger at Oliver. He stepped forward from his post at his father’s side, the place reserved for our ring bearer/best Oliver, and smiled nervously at me.

“Oliver.” I took his hand in the one of mine that was free of Logan’s loving hold. “There are all different kinds of moms and dads in the world. Some mothers bring you into it, and others can love you as much as if they did. That’s how I love you, Oliver—and more than anything in the whole world. I vow to protect and take care of you as your mother for the rest of my life, if you’ll give me that honor.”

My heart shuddered in my chest when Logan squeezed my hand, but I kept my eyes on Oliver.

A huge grin spread over his precious little face. “I do.” He threw his arms around my neck and said, “I love you, Mommy.”

“I love you too, son,” I said, leaning in to kiss his cheek and surprised I’d managed to get out all those words with only the threat of tears.

As Logan helped me up, the expression he wore was one I’d never forget. His face was full of adoration that would be forever in my dreams as he held Oliver’s hand and mine. I did the same, connecting our perfect family.