Authors: A.S. Roberts
I caught Alex’s gaze as he leant his shoulder against the far wall, in deep conversation with who looked like the head suit. I nodded at him and tipped the beer bottle neck towards him. I didn’t need to speak the fucking words, he knew.
Soon after we entered the heaving bar, people started to leave. It was as if they could smell the trouble just fucking pouring off us. The music was loud and pumping, in another place and another time this would have been just the place I would have chosen to sit and get wasted in, but here and now all I wanted was to sort out the dickwad and get back to California.
The room I was fucking dying to get into, was tucked away at the back of the building. A big money game had to be bought into and best of all, those that were carrying had been made to leave their weapons of choice at the door. Only one of the gorillas that the Antonescus had picked up in NYC was outside, we had to slow up as we waited for the FBI.
I felt Alex’s hand on my shoulder as we came to a standstill. I clutched onto a nearby barstool, pushing my nails deep into the leather backrest as I willed my blood pressure to calm the fuck down.
‘Many a time on a mission I felt like you feel now, Nate. You need to focus on what you want to get out of this, and control your body into achieving it.’ He spoke quietly in my ear and squeezed his reassurance with his fingers.
‘I never felt this much fucking hatred before, Al… it’s literally replaced my blood and is coursing through my whole system. I’m finding it hard to control any fucking thing right now. I want to cause him so much goddamn damage, I’m afraid I’ll kill him.’ My fear out in the open, I looked at Alex.
‘If you don’t get yourself under some sort of fucking check, he could end up killing you!’ He grabbed the front of my jacket and moved me around to face him, he wanted my full attention. ‘You’ve got this asswipe right where you want him… make him pay and then we’ll let the FBI do their fucking job… we then get to go back to the women who love us and get on with our charmed lives… you got that?’
My fists opened and closed at my sides. I closed my eyes and took in air through my flared nostrils.
‘If you want I can deal…’ I heard him add and my eyes flew open in response.
‘STOP… you can’t fucking deal with my shit forever, man, we’ve already covered this.’ I watched his eyes flicker their understanding and admiration back to mine and he released the front of my jacket. We waited for the signal to move in.
When it started, it happened quickly. Men streamed down the corridor and forced their way through the door. I could hear shouts and chairs scraping on the tiled floor. Most of the shouts were in a language I couldn’t understand, but to be fucking honest the shouts could have been in American and I still wouldn’t have been able to concentrate on them enough to understand.
Men were man-handled out of the room and finally I entered. The room was thick with smoke and the vague smell of sweat hung in the air. Air-conditioning banged away in the background. I had taken my first glimpse of Ioan stretched out in a chair like butter wouldn’t fucking melt and everything I had worried about before disappeared.
‘So you’re the stupid arsehole she’s got her claws into, are you?’ He stared at me waiting for me to make my move. ‘Whatever she’s told you, it’s complete bloody rubbish… see, she likes the attention, she’s a thrill seeker and would do anything for it… but then you probably already know that?’ The fucking bastard smiled at me then, a gold tooth shinning in amongst his dirty front teeth. That was it, it was all it took. It was like watching the lights come on before a race. I had never known a bigger injection of adrenalin.
Never had I fucking moved so fast in all my life, it was like my bad leg didn’t exist. I was fixated on the slimy asshat’s sparkling grin and I wanted it obliterated. My body flew over the table, the only obstacle in between us, and crashed straight into his. He went down with a dull thud on the tiles. My fists were moving into his dirty looking mouth like I was training for the ring and using his face as a punch bag. I felt him respond as he tried to buck me off his body and a few times his fists connected with my face.
With every connection my knuckles made with his scarred face, I was more determined I was going to reopen the fucking thing, just so he could remember exactly why I was going apeshit on his butt.
‘She’s like a fire inside your bollocks… isn’t she? Once you’ve had that tight little pussy… you’d do anything to feel it again… milking your cock… that’s how it was for me.’ Between every fucking punch the asswipe was still managing to speak. I obviously wasn’t fucking hitting him hard or fast enough. I stood up and pulled him up with me, my bleeding knuckles gripping the collars of his pink shirt so tightly I could hear the fabric ripping under the strain. Once he was up I pushed him against the bare brick wall and placed my left hand tightly around his throat.
‘This seems to be a favourite position of yours, you fucking paedophile rapist.’ I could feel him clawing at my hand trying to remove the death grip I had on him. He wasn’t speaking now. His eyes grew wider as his body screamed for the oxygen he so desperately needed to survive. I hoped he was reliving the time when he had held an innocent fifteen-year-old girl in the same position.
All I could focus on was the scar she had left him to remember her by, it still hadn’t reopened. Adjusting my gait, as both of his arms fought with my grip on him, seemed easy and I flicked my foot up and grabbed at the knife inside of it and pulled it out of its sheath. It was a practised routine I had, when I needed to feel the sharp edge of reassurance. At that moment I finally realised I had been practising that move, for this right here. The blade offered me the comfort I needed, but I could see in the dark recesses of his cess pool eyes it wasn’t doing the fucking same for him as I brought the blade in front of his eyes with a quick movement to make sure he saw the fucking glint.
Oh he saw the fucking glint alright, his eyes bulged wider and he couldn’t look at anything else. His eyes flicked from side to side like he was watching a ping pong ball. I showed him his past and his future.
‘NATE.’ I heard the sudden shout behind me and the hurried movement of shoes hitting the cold tiles, but it was all too goddamn late.
I brought the blade down.
Physically I was pulled backwards off the slimy bastard and I watched with absolute fucking pride as he sunk to the floor. My brothers held on to me, one of them on each side. Alex slammed my bloodied knife-clasping fist onto his knee, making it open in response. The knife hit the floor with a resounding and satisfying clatter.
I looked at him one last time as they dragged me away. The scar that Bella had created was reopened and spilling blood down his cheek, like the tears that he had forced to spill down hers. I closed my eyes. I never wanted to see the fucking bastard ever again.
BELLA
I
had slept fitfully during the night and had woken up feeling less than refreshed. The day was bright and forcing its way through the light coloured curtains. The worry that had haunted my dreams last night came back to me with force and I sat up quickly. I rummaged around the bed for Nathan’s phone, just to check he hadn’t called or text. I’d tried to sleep with it close to me in case anyone should phone. I swiped through each screen and found nothing, my heart sank.
Outside I could just make out the noise of someone in the living area of the cabin and when I concentrated with my nose and not my fears, I could make out the smell of bacon cooking. My insides were rioting as I had hardly eaten yesterday. I swung my feet over and down to the floor, it was great to tread on a clean carpet, but I knew in my heart I would have rather trodden on hot coals to have Nate by my side asleep now. I wondered where the hell he was and if he was OK.
I opened the door and walked through to see Brock cooking over the hob. Max was on the floor pushing around a small collection of bikes and cars, running through a very elaborate make believe story as he did so. I watched as he lifted up his dark head and found me.
‘You’ve woked up… daddy said I was to be verwee quiet and let you sleep.’ He jumped up into my arms and squeezed me like his little life depended on it. It was just what I needed and I ran my hand through his dishevelled bed hair and held him close to me. It was one of the things I loved most about young children, their ability to see through an adult’s shit and to be able to offer you comfort, when you sometimes didn’t even recognise you needed it.
Brock served up the breakfast onto plates and placed them down on the table in the seating area. I placed Max down on the bench seat and he scooted around to his plate, immediately digging into his food. I sat down with a sigh.
‘Have you heard anything, Brock, from Nate?’
‘It’s gone down, Bella… he phoned just before they went in after them.’ I looked up from my plate meeting his ice-blue stare, dropping my cutlery as I stood up and made my way back to Nathan’s phone. I picked it up off the bed and with trembling fingers I dialled my mobile. It rang and rang, and finally I heard the voice I’d wanted to hear for the last God knows how many hours.
‘Speak…’ he replied and started laughing. Tears were chasing each other down my face in sheer bloody unadulterated relief. ‘Darlin… it’s over.’ I sank onto the bed and tucked myself up into a foetal position holding the mobile close to my ear. ‘I’m coming for you, darlin… you better be fucking ready for me. Stop crying and get Brock’s ass into gear. I need to fuck you today, scratch that I’m gonna fuck you today… are you listening to me?’ I laughed with his last sentence. ‘There’s my girl. I’ll see ya soon, darlin.’
‘I’m sorry… Nate.’ My voice was small but I knew he had heard me.
I heard him inhale a deep breath. ‘It never fucking happened, darlin… we’re good, aren’t we?’
‘I hope so… you are everything to me. I need you. I want to be with you always.’
‘Then you’d better be fucking ready for always. You and that gorgeous rack of yours. I’m coming to get ya. Best you make sure you’re ready and waiting, no fucking panties would be good.’
‘That’s easy, I’ve run out of clean ones anyway.’ I laughed at our easy banter and teasing.
‘Tell Brock to keep his goddamn eyes on the road.’ He disconnected the call and I laughed and cried with equal exuberance. Stood in the open doorway was Brock, with Max holding tightly onto his leg, his eyes like saucers as he watched me laughing and crying at the same time. The poor kid didn’t know what to make of it and I started to pull myself together for his sake, as I watched Brock cup and rub the back of his son’s head in reassurance.
I want that. I want Nathan to hold our son to him.
‘We need to go please, Brock, as soon as we can.’ I met his eyes and gave him a small smile.
Shaking his head at me, he answered, ‘Going nowhere, Bella until you eat some breakfast.’
I started to protest and watched as he brought his finger to his mouth to sshh me.
What was it about these men? Bloody alpha male, control freaks.
I hurried behind them as they made their way back to the table. We all sat down and in between struggling to calm my breathing down and the hiccups that had started, I managed to swallow the food and it was SO bloody good. I chased the food down my throat with a cup of almost decent tasting tea.
He was alright, he was safe and so was I.
‘Nate’s OK, Brock,’ I forced out in my relief, just loving the sound of those few words as they tripped off my tongue. He already knew by my earlier response, but I needed to say them. I wanted to roll the words around with my tongue, liking the way they felt and sounded.
The tears began to flow once again at the thought and I quickly held the palm of my hand up to Brock, he had started to stand up at the table to make his way around to where I sat. Once he saw me shake my head at him he sat down with a sigh, looking at Max.
‘Daddy I don’t understand… what has Uncle Nathan done to make Bella cry?’
‘I know it doesn’t look like it, Max, but she’s happy… honest,’ he let out a chuckle after the comment, and ruffled the top of Max’s head.