Authors: Hilary Storm
Thump Thump
Thump Thump
Thump Thump
Thump Thump
“It sounds like a heartbeat!” She sounds excited. I freeze.
Thump Thump
Thump Thump
Thump Thump
∞∞∞∞
∞∞∞∞∞∞∞
Eaven
This is fun. I am sitting on his lap and pretending to play the drums. I have managed to make him stop me because the sounds were so out of rhythm and hectic. Now that I am making the sound of a heartbeat, he has stiffened beneath me.
I stop and look over my shoulder and see his pain again. What did I do wrong?
“I am so sorry.” I whisper and frown.
He says softly into my ear “You have done nothing to be sorry about. I am sorry that I am not better company tonight. This is just a bad time for me.”
“You can teach me more another time.” I stand and turn to
face him. His hands grab mine and he pulls me toward him. He wraps his arms around my waist and hugs my stomach. I stand there for a while before I realize he has a tear running down his face. I wish he would tell me what is going on. I am confused, but the one thing I know for sure is that this guy is hurting very badly. If I can do anything to ease his pain then that is what I am going to do.
“Talon. Come lay down with me on your bed.” I turn away and try not to let him notice that I have seen
a tear. I go to the far side of the bed and sit down.
He turns off the light and sits on
the side of the bed closest to the door. I decide to kick off my shoes and crawl over to the side he is on. I lie on the pillow and reach for him. He crawls over me and lays his head on my chest and collapses his body on the bed next to me. He wraps his arm around my hips and we lay there in complete silence.
~
Chapter Three~
Talon
Seven months ago
Taron: Where are you?
Talon: At the club.
Taron: Dude, your girl is at the river near the bridge.
Talon: What? Are you with her?
Taron: No I was driving by and saw her.
Talon: Go back and find her, I’m on my way.
I
am driving like a lunatic to the bridge. Nicole has been very depressed lately. She told me that she couldn’t go through with the pregnancy. She said having a baby now will ruin her life. I begged her to reconsider and told her I would take care of it with her. She didn’t want any part of that. I got so pissed at her that I couldn’t even look at her. How could she think about ending the life of our child after she saw the heart beating on the monitor? We heard the swooshing sound that proved the baby was alive and well. How could she consider doing anything to stop that heart from beating?
I just stormed out on her not that long ago at her apartment
after she told me she wanted an abortion. What is she doing out at the river?
My headlights shine on the bridge and I see that she is on the outside of the rail hanging on. Taron is talking to her and
trying to hang on to her from the inside of the rail. I run to where Taron is standing and freeze because I hear Nicole sobbing and talking to Taron.
“I can’t go through with this. My life is over if I have a baby. I will never be able to finish college.
I don’t even love him anymore. Leave me alone Taron. Let me do this.”
“I am not letting you do this to my brother. He loves you and this baby.”
“What the hell do you know about love?” She mumbles to Taron.
“Just that my br
other is more capable of it than I am and that you are his everything.”
“He left me today.”
“I am sure it is just a misunderstanding.”
Taron tries to reassure her.
“Nicole, what are you doing?” I ask her.
“Talon, I told you that I am not having this baby. You won’t listen to me and I feel like I am losing control of my life.”
“I will listen to you, just get off the ledge and we will talk. I promise you that I will be here for everything. Please Nicole. Please get off the ledge.”
Taron is still holding on to Nicole. She is sobbing uncontrollably and no longer holding onto the railing. Taron manages to grab her in a bear hug and falls backwards onto the road with her in his arms. I grab her up into my arms and hug her as tight as I can. She scared the shit out of me and I am afraid to let her go. She is not hugging me back. She is standing there lifeless in my arms. “Why did you come here?” I whisper to her.
“I am done Talon.
I hate my life. I don’t want to be with you anymore. I don’t want this baby and you are pressuring me to keep it.”
“Let’s go and talk about this together somewhere.”
I notice Taron is standing nearby. He has always been there for me and now he is here when I need him the most.
“I don’t want to talk about it anymore, let go of me.” Nicole is getting pissed off. I release her. She takes a step back from me and just looks at me. She has a look in her eyes that I have never seen before.
“I am going to have an abortion. You can’t stop me. I am not in love with you Talon.” She says, and turns to start to walk away from me. I am standing there and I feel like my heart has been ripped out of my chest.
“How can you kill something that we created? How can you expect me to stand by and let you do that? I won’t be able to live with myself if I don’t try to stop you.”
“I knew you wouldn’t listen to me. We both want different things.”
“This is new for me too
, Nicole. Life will throw us curve balls and we have to learn to deal with them. I want to keep our baby. I will raise it myself. Don’t have the abortion. Please listen to me. You will never have to deal with it after it is born. My family will help me raise it. I will dedicate my whole life to giving it everything it needs.”
“Talon I am
already with someone else.” I hear this and I am instantly full of rage and anger.
“What are you talking about Nicole? Who else have you been fucking?”
“I just needed some pills. He told me that the only way he would give them to me is if I had sex with him.”
I can’t even think right now. I am so pissed that my mind won
’t focus on words to say to her. “Who fucking ‘gave’ you pills Nicole?”
“His name doesn’t matter. I just needed the pills
to figure out what I wanted to do.”
“What do you mean you needed pills to figure out what you wanted to do
, Nicole? Those fucking pills will not help you think straight. They will not fix everything that is wrong in the world.”
“You don’t know what you are talking about. It’s not like I have a
drug problem. I just wanted to be able to think straight and not feel like my life is crashing all around me.”
I can’t believe she is taking pills while carrying my baby. What am I saying? She doesn’t even want the baby.
Is it even my baby?
“Is the baby even mine?” I ask.
“Yes”
“I am taking you home to your
mom. You need help. I can’t deal with you.”
“You are over reacting. I am not going anywhere with you.” Nicole looks at me in disgust and starts walking toward her car. I run to catch up with her.
“We are not finished with our conversation, Nicole.” She gets in her car and slams the door closed locking it immediately. She starts the car and drives off like a bat out of hell.
Taron and I run to his truck and take off after her. We d
on’t catch up with her before she reaches Springfield. “I assume she is going home. Take me there.”
She is not there when we arrive at her apartment. “What would you like me to do Talon?” Taron said
, waiting patiently for my response.
I don’t know what to say
. I don’t know what to do. I am lost trying to come up with a plan. Where would she go? Who is her pill guy that demands sex for payment? I don’t even know where to start looking for someone like that. “I guess I wait here for her.”
“
I am here with you brother. I wish we knew where the hell she went.” We wait for two hours until she pulls up in her car. She rams her car up over the curb so hard that her front tires go over it and almost onto the sidewalk. I run over to her car as she opens the door.
“W
here the fuck did you go Nicole?” She stumbles out of her car and starts making her way into her apartment. “Did you take more pills?” She keeps walking until she reaches the door. She begins fumbling with her keys. She tries three different keys before I yank the key ring from her. I open the door. “Just go. I don’t want you near me.” She says in this slurring low voice, barely able to keep her eyes open. I know that voice and that look.
“Taron call 911.” I scream
at him. I turn to look in her direction and notice her going into the bathroom and closing the door. I rush over to the door only to find that she locked it. I find it ironic she couldn’t even unlock the other door, yet she can so quickly lock me out of the bathroom. I start beating on the door. “Open the door Nicole.”
She doesn’t reply. “OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR BEFORE I KICK IT DOWN.” I hear her flush the toilet and then hear water running. She must be washing her hands.
I decide I am tired of waiting and kick down her bathroom door. That is when I see the empty bottle on the counter right next to the sink. She can’t even stand on her own. She can’t open her eyes. I can’t believe we are back to this point again.
I grab her and yank her towards
the toilet and put my finger down her throat. She gags, but doesn’t throw up. I keep doing it. Fuck. Come on. She is passing out and going lifeless. Taron grabs her body to hold it up so that I can continue to try to get her to lose some of the pills. Finally, we hear the ambulance. I keep trying until the EMT’s take her from us. I can’t watch as they work on her. I walk outside to get air.
Taron stays with them, with her. I hear him tell the responders that she is pregnant. Not long after, they are bringing her out to the ambulance. Taron tells me to get in the truck. It is as though I can’t function without being told what to do. I am just watching life happen and I can’t speak or think. He calls Nicole’s mom and tells her about what happened and tells her to come to the hospital. These are things I should be thinking of, but I am not.
When we arrive at the hospital, we are forced to stay in a waiting room. I feel numb all over. I should be pissed and yelling at the nurse to let me back there with her, with my baby. Taron keeps asking the nurse if there is an update on Nicole or if we can go back there. I haven’t moved from my chair. Everything I care about is back there and I can’t move from this seat. It is as though the life has been sucked out of my body and I am just a shell consuming space. How could I fail my child so badly that I didn’t see this coming?
The doctor finally comes in and asks for Nicole’s family. Taron tells him that I am her fiancé. The doctor sits next to me and tells me that they had to pump Nicole’s stomach and that she is
finally responding. She will be required to go to a rehabilitation clinic to get help with her addiction and suicide attempt. I haven’t said a word to the doctor. My eyes haven’t moved from the spot on the floor that I have been staring at for hours.
“What about the baby?” Taron asks the doctor. I hear nothing, so I move my eyes from the spot to the doctor’s face.
He puts his hand on my shoulder and says “I am so sorry, the baby didn’t make it.”
~Chapter Four~
Talon
I wake up in bed alone. It is Sunday and the day I should be meeting my little girl or boy. I won’t be. I slept the best I have in months. I usually wake up from a nightmare, but last night I slept peacefully. I wonder when Eaven slipped out. I am going to have to call her sometime. She may never want to hang out with me again after the way I acted last night.
I roll over and notice a note on my night stand.
Talon,
Good morning handsome!
I really enjoyed spending time with you. I put my number in your phone so that you can call me sometime.
Eaven
Is it terrible that I want to call her right now? She doesn’t deserve to have to put up with all of my baggage and all of my demons. I should spare her my issues and delete her number right now, but I can’t bring myself to do it.
“You about ready bro?” Taron knocks on my door. He knows what today is. He knows that I will have a rough time today. He has been there through all of the stages of it.
“Yea, give me a couple and I will be out.”
I get dressed and head for the kitchen. I smell bacon. OJ and bacon will hit the spot.
“Did you have a good time with Eaven last night? I saw her sneaking out of here this morning. She looked rough.
She looked like you wore her ass out.” He says with a smirk on his face.
“Shut the fuck up Taron. I am not in the mood for your shit this morning.”
“Oh I am not starting anything, I am just happy to see you finally have some fun. You have been somber for months now. You seem like you really like her.”