Ignite (24 page)

“I won’t lie,” I promise.

“You still love Addie, don’t you?”

“Well, aren’t you subtle?” I smirk, watching her shrug. “I mean… yeah, of course I do. She’s been my best friend since we were kids.”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it,” she says, rolling her eyes and handing me my cup. “I know you love her, I mean are you
in
love with her? Do you pine for her, need her? Yada yada yada… all that crap.”

Once the shock wears off, I’m strongly considering lying to her anyway. Telling her the truth can only make things more complicated, especially knowing she’s most likely going to turn around and tell Addie. I think the smart thing to do is deny any feelings I have, but try as I might, I can’t.

Just the thought of denying that Addie Greyson owns every part of my being feels wrong.

Letting out a low sigh, I start to speak when I’m cut short.

“Hey,” Addie says in a quiet voice, entering the room.

“See what I mean?” Brittany shakes her head, letting out an exasperated sigh. “Totally annoying.”

“Hey,” I say with a chuckle, turning to face her.

Her hair is still damp, the familiar smell of her shampoo assaulting my senses as she reaches for the coffee cup Brittany’s handing her. Taking a small sip, she leans against the counter and takes us in with a curious expression.

“What are y’all talking about?”

“The weather,” Brittany says quickly. “I was asking Zeke if he thought it was going to rain today.”

“Really?” she asks suspiciously.

“Yep,” Brittany nods. “He didn’t answer me yet.”

“Oh,” she says, shrugging slightly before facing me with an apologetic look. “Have you been waiting long?”

“No, just a minute,” I reply, feeling Brittany stare into the side of my face, waiting for me to answer her real question.

“Yep, he just got here,” Brittany says. “Which is a real pity because I have to get going. My super awesome aunt is visiting and I haven’t seen her in forever, so I should take off. Especially since I still don’t know about that
rain
.”

“Do you want me to walk you out?” she asks, setting her coffee cup down and missing my amused reaction to her friend.

“No, I’m good, thanks. Just give me a hug,” she says, squeezing her tight. “Call me soon. I love you.”

“I will,” she says. “I love you, too.”

After a moment, Brittany pulls away and turns to me, extending her arms.

“You, too,” she says. “Get in here, big guy.”

“Okay,” I chuckle, returning her hug.

“Keep an eye on her for me,” she says quietly, her tone more serious than usual.

“I will,” I promise before glancing over at Addie as she walks her to the door. “Hey Brittany?”

“Yeah?” she asks, turning back to face me.

“Drive safe,” I tell her, holding her eyes. “I did hear something about getting a lot of rain.”

“Really?” she asks, a look of understanding creep over her features.

“Absolutely,” I nod immediately. “The more I think about it, the more positive I am.”

“I guess I better get going then,” she smiles. “A storm’s brewing here, too.”

“I don’t think so,” I sigh, glancing over at Addie before facing her friend.

“Oh I am,” she argues, pulling the door open and looking over her shoulder and throwing me a wink. “Matter of fact, I heard about it just last night.”

Zeke

As I suspected, there was a slight adjustment period for us over the first couple of days I was around her. Since Chad left for work early and I worked nights, it was easy for us to find time to hang out. Addie still hadn’t found a job, but she was determined to find something by the end of the month. Lucky for me, her class schedule next semester required her to find something at night, leaving her mornings free for at least a few more weeks.

At night, sometimes I’d come home to find her sitting on the steps, looking up at the stars. It wasn’t the roof, but it was the closest I’d come in a long time to feeling like I was where I was meant to be.

I wasn’t naïve. I knew this was a dangerous game I was playing since I feel the way I do and she’s with someone. Even knowing that, I still can’t bring myself to stay away from her.

I can’t say it’s been easy to be around her knowing we aren’t together. We hadn’t slipped back into the same easy, platonic friendship we’d once shared, either. I think we both knew that we could never go back to that place again. Somehow, we’d been able to compromise between the two.

I can’t touch her the way I want to, the only way that felt natural now, but neither of us fought our incessant need to be close. When we were alone together, we sat closer than necessary, both of us finding excuses to the other. Our normal conversation held a flirtatious undertone that it hadn’t before the summer that changed everything.

From the outside looking in, it could be said that this was just a natural progression, that it was something we did automatically, never thinking of it. I’d wondered that the first day myself, but I knew better.

We both did.

Addie

“Addison, are you almost ready?” Chad asks from the hallway.

“Yes,” I reply, keeping the sigh that leaves my lips silent.

Smoothing my dark skirt over, I lift my purse over my shoulder and plaster on the best version of a smile I can manage before swinging the door open to face him. Per our agreement, I’m dressed nice and ready for our date. I had no idea where we were going, but it didn’t really matter. Although I had to admit his demeanor toward me had improved, I can’t say I’m looking forward to spending the next few hours with him. 

“You look nice,” he mutters, the way his eyes travel over me making my skin crawl. “Thank you for making an effort.”

“You’re welcome,” I manage with a small smile at his compliment.

Following him to the truck, I’ve barely got my seatbelt on before he’s peeling out of the parking lot. As the smell of rubber assaults me, I stifle an eye roll and stay quiet as I do my best to drown out his immaturity.

There’s one old lady in the parking lot, dumbass,
I think to myself.
Even if you were cool, who are you trying to impress right now?

After the movie I had no interest in, we went to dinner at a small Italian restaurant Chad had mentioned earlier that day. We usually didn’t talk much during the time we spent together, which I was fine with. When we did talk, it was normally him droning on and on about himself, me giving him the occasional smile and nod. Tonight though, he surprised me by making an attempt at friendly conversation for once.

“Did you enjoy the movie?”

“Yes,” I lie. “Thank you for taking me.”

“You’re welcome,” he starts, taking a sip from his drink and clearing his throat. “How have you been getting settled?”

“Fine, thanks,” I say with a small smile. “I’ve got a couple interviews lined up for tomorrow so fingers crossed.”

“Good,” he says simply, growing silent for a moment before continuing. “I really like this place.”

“I’ve never been here before, but it’s pretty good,” I reply, lifting my wine glass and trying my best to not empty it in one sip. “This wine is delicious.”

Watching me finish the glass, he gestures for the waiter to bring me another and I sing my silent praises to the heavens that at least one good thing has come from this night. The bulk of our meal continues like this and by the time I’m on my fourth glass, I’m feeling ballsy.

“Chad, can I ask you something?”

“Yes,” he says, the surprise in his eyes not lost on me.

While I’m almost always polite to him, answering his questions and responding to him when he speaks, I never initiate communication with him. For most of my life, I’d been this way with most people, but with Chad it’s different. Before, it was out of shyness, the natural feeling of not belonging. Before, I didn’t ask because I was out of the loop. With him, I don’t ask because I don’t care. The only thing I care about is getting home from work right now and with any luck, will be waiting for me on the steps later.

Refusing to taint his image with the stupidity that is this ‘date,’ I shake my head clear and replace my attention on the task at hand. Looking across the table at him, I take in his short blonde hair, his green eyes and his athletic build and ask the question I’d been wondering for weeks.

“You’re not a bad looking guy. You make good money, have a nice apartment, enjoy going out…” I start, piquing his interest as I begin gesturing between us. “Why this? Why not go out somewhere and find someone who can give you the things you actually want?”

“I think you’ve had enough wine,” he says, irritation staining his voice.

“I’m sorry, I’m really not trying to insult you. If anything, I’m trying to understand you, help you even. Yes, there are certain things I’m not interested in sharing with you, but that wouldn’t be the case with every woman, Chad. You have qualities that a lot of woman look for in a guy,” I say, shaking my head. “I just don’t understand why you don’t date someone who’s willing to give you the things you want.”

Wiping the linen napkin over his mouth, he lets his thought wander before leaning forward slightly.

“I work a lot, so it doesn’t leave me much time to date. I know I could just walk into a club and pick a random girl to fuck, but I don’t want that. I want you,” he starts with a shrug, sending a chill up my spine. “Besides, sometimes I crave companionship and I’m sure you will agree that one night stands aren’t much for that.”

“I guess,” I say quietly.

“What do you mean you guess?” he smirks at my response. “Have you had a lot of deep and meaningful ones?”

“No,” I shake my head. “I mean I’ve never had one so I can’t say for sure, but I would imagine you’d be right.”

You shouldn’t have had so much to drink. It always makes you say stupid shit
, I think to myself as I curse the wine glass in my hand
. I thought we were cool.

The look of surprise on his face at my words is enough to have me kicking myself.

Maybe you haven’t had
enough
to drink, Addie. Maybe
that’s
your problem.

“Never?” he asks, raising his eyebrows when I shake my head. “Well, if you’re interested…”

“I’m not,” I say bluntly as I toss back the last of my wine. “I’m not interested in sex at all.”

“Wow,” he starts with a snide chuckle. “Someone must have done a real number on you.”

“Nope,” I tell him, leaning back as I push my half-eaten plate away. “That’s just not something I have any interest in.”

“So, what are you telling me you’re a virgin?” he laughs in disbelief, staring across the table to find my eyes deadpan.

The drunk part of me wants to scream across the table at him. Tell him how I lie awake at night, struggling to drown out his snoring while I fantasize about the perfect man who lives across the way. I want to rub it in his smug face that I loved having Zeke inside me. How even after two years without him, I still crave the taste of his sweat on my lips as he fucks me into oblivion.

Luckily though, sober Addie kicks in and reminds me that Chad would make my life miserable if he knew about me and Zeke. Not only would he take away the only thing keeping me breathing right now, he doesn’t deserve to know about us. Even if I never have Zeke like that again, us together was perfection… magic.

There’s no way I’ll ever let Chad taint that.

“Looks like you found out my secret, Chad,” I lie, internally rolling my eyes at his expression.
Idiot.
“I’m a virgin.”

Zeke

“Hey,” I say as I pull the door open to find Addie sitting on the steps outside.

Its midday, so I’m a little surprised to find her out here, but happy nonetheless.

“Hey,” she says, looking over her shoulder and giving me a smile. “I thought you had to work today?”

“My boss gave me the day off because I worked a double yesterday,” I explain as I sit down beside her and take in her attire, remembering her interviews. “How’d you do?”

“I dunno,” she admits. “I’m waiting to hear back from that one place, but I don’t think I’ll get it. They wanted someone with clerical experience and I don’t have any.”

“Sorry, babe,” I start, watching her shrug. “I know you wanted that one.”

“Doesn’t matter,” she sighs, clicking away on her phone. “I just need a job, like… a month ago.”

“Yeah,” I nod. “What are you doing outside? You’re usually inside this time of day.”

“Chad’s home,” she says simply.

“Oh,” I nod. “You two fighting or something?”

“No,” she shakes her head, still tapping on her phone.

I’m about to speak when I hear the distinct sound of a woman’s moan coming from her apartment. Darting my eyes back and forth between her and the door, I can’t help but keep the shock from my face.

“Addie... Is that…?”

“Yeah,” she says, seemingly unaffected.

“Chad’s cheating on you?” I ask her, my mind reeling.

“Apparently,” she says with a smirk.

Although she’d made it clear from the first night I saw her she wasn’t really feeling their relationship, I still can’t help the way my eyebrows shoot up in surprise. Not only is her lack of interest in the subject a complete contrast from the Addie I’ve always known, I can’t wrap my head around having her and even thinking about anyone else.

Even after two years without her, she still dominates my every thought.

“Addie, that’s fucked up,” I blurt out, the look on my face one of disgust.

“Hey, better her than me,” she says with a small smile.

“What?” I ask. “You’re fine with it?”

“What the hell do I care what he does?”

“Sounds like you really love him,” I say sarcastically.

“I don’t,” she says bluntly, holding my eyes. “I don’t love him.”

“So why are you living with him, Add?”

“Long story,” she sighs, shaking her head.

“I don’t have anywhere to be.” Looking over at me, she seems to consider her next words for a moment. “Besides, I always liked your stories and this one sounds like a doozy.”

“Yeah, well, this one’s a doozy alright, but I don’t think you’d like it,” she says with a sad smile. “So far, it’s kind of a drag.”

“So why are you still writing the story, Addie?” I ask, holding her eyes as she looks over at me.

“Because it’s almost over,” she smiles. “And if all the stars align, I’ll be writing a better one very soon.”