How to Give Her Absolute Pleasure (10 page)

shoulders, buttocks, backs of her knees, armpits, and everywhere else.

Here is where we return to the fifth sense. When you are touching all
The Picasso
. Many women also like a form of genital kissing. As areas of her body, overlook no surface. One man has said after one gentleman from my seminar said, “I love to kiss a woman ‘down giving his partner a massage, “I know I’ve done a good job when there,’ her nipples, or anywhere, and then go back to her mouth.” For she’s almost asleep or she gets mad when I finish.”

some women, your tasting her and being that open about it is a Of course, every woman is different and you may want to adhere special act of acceptance—one of the most powerful aphrodisiacs to the cardinal rule of “ask first.” It’s also just as important for you to and akin to a lady tasting and/or swallowing you.

enjoy her whole body. As one woman warned, “I felt like I was a machine with operating parts. He’d touch A then B then C and I was
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supposed to be ready for sex. My God—enough already. I’m not on Kissing is the number one way to get your lady’s motor running.

remote control.” That said, the key to amazing foreplay is in your willingness to travel her body, caressing it while at the same time staying away from the so-called action spots (i.e., her genitals).

The Hand Kiss
. One of the more gracious forms of courtly You may also want to keep in mind that the majority of us will behavior. When she extends her hand as if to have you shake it, touch someone the way we like to be touched. But very often there is grasp it lightly, just as you would if you were going to shake it. Then a difference between the pressure a man likes and what a woman turn it clockwise and kiss the back of her hand in the middle, making likes. Men tend to prefer deeper, stronger pressure, while women sure your lips are dry. Hold the kiss for two seconds, then release her respond more to gentler, softer pressure. Why? Because as a function hand. One woman recounted this story: “On our second date, we had of testosterone, the male hormone, a man’s skin is thicker and just ordered the wine. When the sommelier had left, my boyfriend denser. As a result, the touch that works for you may be too firm for turned to me and said, ‘I have wanted to do this all night.’ Then, ever her and may make her feel uncomfortable or actually hurt her.

¾ Gently play with her hair at the base of her neck, lift it, and
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kiss underneath.

The fascination with erogenous zones of a woman’s body is not new. During the eighteenth century, a miniature painting ¾ Hold her against you and let her feel your warm breath on appeared in India, showing the erogenous spots on the female her scalp; this will be subtle but deeply felt.

body. In that time it was believed that these spots changed each ¾ If your arm is around her shoulders, play with her hair as you day during the lunar month.

walk.

Gentlemen, I know you may not be comfortable with asking or
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receiving directions, so I have provided you with a topographical According to a hairstylist who could have been the model for guide, so to speak, of a woman’s body. What I have heard again and Warren Beatty’s character in Shampoo, the more hair on the nape again from men in my seminars is that you truly respond to maps and of a woman’s neck, the more abundant her pubic hair—some men guides, liking to peruse them at your leisure, in order to familiarize love lots of pubic hair, and some men just don’t. It’s all yourselves with various routes or the logistics of a trip. I am going to individualistic.

be systematic here and start at the top of her body and move down, giving you hints and pointers about how to enliven each particular area.

Face touching is a very gentle, intimate gesture, and the key to
HEAD

making it as sensual as possible is the intensity of eye-to-eye contact.

The majority of women like to have their head massaged and their But he aware of whether or not she is wearing makeup. If she is, ask hair touched, played with, and enjoyed. Remember the feeling of a her to remove it, then use the back of your hand or finger to trace good scalp massage? You need to employ that same kind of motion lightly the side of her jawline, down her cheekbone, and then down to your lover’s head. You may want to do this on a night that you are her neck. Believe me, women remember how you touch them.

not going out and she doesn’t mind having her hair mussed up.

You may also want to try running your fingertips or a hairbrush
TIPS

through her hair gently and steadily. If you have a daughter or a ¾ Use the tips of your fingers to outline her lips. Close both sister whose hair you have brushed, you may be at an advantage in your eyes and do the same to each other.

this area. Although the stroke can be a straight, downward motion, ¾ Ask her to suck on your finger once it is close to her mouth.

you can give yourself some varying moves by doing a J-shaped An interested lady will show you on your finger what else stroke, which is a long stroke through her hair with a little up tail at her tongue can do, and you can use this as a prelude to using the end. Remember to brush her entire head, not just the back. You your tongue elsewhere.

might also ask her to brush yours to show you how she likes her own ¾ Play a game in which each of you, eyes closed, kisses the hair brushed. This way, you can study how she varies the stroke, its other just on the side of the mouth. If your nose touches, you location, and its strength.

lose.

rather than a straight up-and-down motion. Your tongue, lips,
EARS

fingers, and chin will work well for you here. She is more than likely Remember how we spoke of being able to tell how your lover likes going to respond like a cat and nuzzle into you. Her skin here is very being touched by how she touches you? Well, the way in which a sensitive and thin, so you don’t need to use a lot of pressure. As one woman responds to touching of her ear is a perfect example of how woman said, “When he starts down my neck, I can feel my crotch men and women differ. As one male seminar attendee said, “A heat up. I can’t believe such a small area can cause my whole body woman who puts her tongue in my ear is a straight-line boner for to react. I shiver all over.”

me.” This makes sense, as men’s ears are an androgenic receptor The adage that variety is the spice of life is very true here. Don’t site; in other words, those cells receive signals from the male always use the same motion. Make your fingers and hands continue hormones, which is the reason men have hair in their ears.

down to her shoulders. Balance your touch on both sides—don’t For the majority of women, however, a tongue in the ear is like overlook what massage therapists have known for years!

having their head in a washing machine. (There are, however, women who love this sensation, but they are definitely in the
TIPS

minority.) The action I am referring to here is glomming onto her ear ¾ The sides of a woman’s neck from the base of her earlobes with suction and pushing your tongue into the ear. It’s best to use to the top of her neck are one of the more sensitive areas on your full wet mouth on other parts of her body, not at this tender her body.

conical opening. If you can’t resist her ear, best to try tracing along ¾ Start softly with fingertips, mix in lips and tongue, and be the outside rim and behind the back of her earlobe with your tongue sure to touch both sides.

or sucking on her earlobes. Be sure to use a full open mouth for a ¾ Lift up her hair and kiss down the back of her neck, and less direct, warm breath.

continue across her shoulders. This is a perfect move when she’s wearing anything strapless.

¾ Breathe lightly. She wants to know you are there, but you
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don’t want to risk sounding like a hurricane.

Ladies have asked that you please don’t go directly to action ¾ Be careful not to blow too forcefully into her ear; if too spots. Instead, delay arrival. They prefer a slow buildup. Paying harsh, this move, while tempting in a romantic kind of way, attention to the minor areas first is critical.

will not arouse her.

¾

Lick, then lightly blow. This technique causes the opposing sensations of heat/moisture and then cooling. You may also want to try this on her nipples, side of her neck, or the curve
BELLY BUTTON

of her back.

Some women love to have a tongue, finger, or nose in their belly button. For others this is decidedly not the case. “I love it when he
NECK AND SHOULDERS

plays with my belly button ring, because his mouth is hot. He says he This erogenous zone is invariably a doozy for women. Touching her likes that side of me—I’m an executive by day and a club girl by neck and shoulders can create goose bumps and shivers all over her night.” Another woman, a mother of three, said, “No way. Poking body if done in the right way. It’s best to use a circular, wavy motion anything in it makes me want to pee.”

love her buttocks. One woman from a seminar said, “When my boyfriend told me that part of me is the one part he loves to watch,
TIPS

touch, and taste, I was astounded. Now that I’m more comfortable, ¾ All points from the top of the pubic hair to the point between we read the Sunday paper and he rests his head in the curve of my the breasts can be massaged in a gentle, circular (clockwise) back with his cheek on the curve of my butt.”

motion with fingers or thumbs.

¾ Consider her belly button the perfect repository for

champagne or other beverages. As it is just north of a highly ¾ If you position your lady on all fours, you can lean your enervated area, any attention to her navel will spread there.

chest against her buttocks and caress her breasts at the same time.

¾ If she enjoys anal play, you can begin to heighten her The area across her back right above the curve of her buttocks, which sensation by gently spreading her cheeks; this will stimulate is called the sacral curve, is often a very sensitive pressure zone. By her anus, reminding her of things to come.

gently applying pressure with your entire hand, you may excite her in a way mysterious to you both. Stroking the whole of her back or
LIMBS

lightly tracing the area with your fingers is another inventive move.

Think of all the room you have here! Legs, arms, wrists, hands! As As one lady said, “This is why you have hot breath and why we with any touching, be sure to touch both sides of her, as balancing women wear backless gowns.”

sensation is important. When it comes to touching her limbs, you can use more pressure because the skin is thicker. Recently on a plane, I
TIPS

watched a couple as the woman leaned into him, half asleep. Her ¾ Some women may be self-conscious of your attention to this partner was gently circling her hand and wrist with his fingertips, area because of its proximity to her derriere, so be

and judging from the serene smile on her face, she was in bliss. It considerate and aware. Either tell her how much you enjoy was sweet to watch him watching her. He was making her feel so touching this area, or, if she’s too sensitive, concentrate on good.

the front of her body.

¾ Moving from her back down to her buttocks brings sensation
TIPS

from her groin into her genital area.

¾ Touching her limbs is a great way to enliven her nerve ¾ One way to build lubrication is to focus on the small dimples endings, creating radiating pleasure in the outer reaches of on her back. Tell her what you’re going to do and then put her body.

your tongue there.

¾ The other benefit to touching limbs is they are external—you can have as much fun as you want in public! Limbs are also
BUTTOCKS

a great place to do the Swirl (see later in this chapter).

Dare we overlook one of men’s more admired areas of a woman’s body? As I mentioned above, many women are sensitive or

uncomfortable about not only exposing but having their derrieres be In this area of the body, I have borrowed from the Chinese, who have the center of attention. It’s up to you to show and tell her that you used the feet as the entryway to the rest of the body. When rubbing Openmirrors.com

or massaging a woman’s feet, there are a couple of important things Massaging these points, based loosely on reflexology (see foot to remember. You both need to be in a comfortable position in which diagram), will

you can access both feet easily. Try sitting between her legs on the floor in front of her, or with her leg draped over yours as you face 1. Increase relief.

her toes. Use a body lotion to give you greater ease of stroking 2. Reduce anxiety.

motion and drape a towel over your knee so no lotion lands where it 3. Clear the mind.

shouldn’t.

4. Reduce neck tension.

The main aim in a foot massage is to release the tension of the 5. Reduce eye stress.

tiny muscles and ligaments holding the little bones in place. Your 6. Improve mood.

thumbs will be your best digits for foot massages. It’s best to use 7. Reduce stress.

small circular strokes from the heel up to the toes with both thumbs, 8. Regulate breathing.

the way a masseur would move up your spine. Don’t use a two-9. Reduce tension.

handed squeeze from the instep up to the toes. Any compacting, 10. Reduce nervousness.

squishing motion pushes all the little bones in the foot together, and 11. Increase circulation.

that hurts. If she is close to getting her period, the outer side below 12. Loosen stomach muscles.

her ankle may be very tender. Be gentle. Release toe pressure by 13. Reduce anxiety.

gently pulling each toe in an upward motion. Start with your thumbs 14. Reduce nervousness.