How to Defeat Harmful Habits (Counseling Through the Bible Series) (33 page)
“As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another”
(P
ROVERBS
27:17).
•
Don’t
assume that you are helpless if anorexics won’t eat. Offer to hand-feed the person as a short-term
emergency
response (not a pattern of behavior). Because anorexics possess a negative mind-set that tells them not to eat, hand-feeding can relieve their self-imposed pressure of guilt and fear of overeating.
“Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ”
(G
ALATIANS
6:2).
•
Don’t
stock or eat “trigger” or unhealthy foods in your home if an anorexic or bulimic lives with you. Just as you would not flaunt alcohol in the presence of a recovering alcoholic, realize the anorexic’s great struggle to eat healthily and tremendous need to avoid temptation.
“Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one”
(M
ATTHEW
6:13).
•
Don’t
compliment positive changes in body weight by saying, “You look healthy.”
The word
healthy
, to strugglers, means “fat.” To say they look healthy translates into telling them they look fat. Don’t mention any weight gain. Tell them their eyes look sparkly and alive again, their skin youthful, their hair shiny and silky, and their energy level high.
“Each of us should please his neighbor for his good, to build him up”
(R
OMANS
15:2).
•
Don’t
give up. Patience, persistence, and perseverance are essential for helping restore your loved one to wholeness.
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud…. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails”
(1 C
ORINTHIANS
13:4,7-8).
Religious Obsessions and Disordered EatingQ
UESTION:
“Why would some anorexics view
not
eating as an ‘act of faith’?”
A
NSWER:
If they come from a highly structured or authoritarian religious background, their refusal to eat helps them feel a sense of control in the midst of a life that’s gotten out of control.
Lovingly remind them of these biblical principles:
• Using Scripture to justify destructive choices does not honor God. Remember, Satan twisted Scripture to match his twisted thinking.
“‘If you are the Son of God,’ he [Satan] said, ‘throw yourself down. For it is written: “He will command his angels concerning you, and they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.”’ Jesus answered him, ‘It is also written: “Do not put the Lord your God to the test”’”
(M
ATTHEW
4:6-7).
Is it possible that the sufferer is misusing Scripture to justify his or her flawed attitude toward food?
• While Christ calls us to lay down our lives for Him, He never calls anyone to murder themselves (suicide), but desires for us to be “living” sacrifices.
“Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship”
(R
OMANS
12:1).
What does it mean to be a “living” sacrifice to God, and how could suicide (by refusal to eat) ever qualify as a “living” sacrifice that is “holy and pleasing to God”?
• Christ intends for us to demonstrate to the world the fullness of life that only He can make possible.
“I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full…Let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven”
(J
OHN
10:10; M
ATTHEW
5:16).
How does one’s attitude toward food demonstrate the fullness of life that Jesus provides?
• A biblical perspective on life and caring for one’s body assumes that proper nutritional needs are met.
“After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church—for we are members of his body”
(E
PHESIANS
5:29-30).
Jesus takes care of His spiritual body, the church. Doesn’t He expect us to care for the physical body that He gave us?
Help strugglers to understand their inestimable worth to God and know that by refusing to eat, they are challenging God’s assessment of their value. God provides food for birds, but if the birds were to reject God’s gift of food, they would die. Rejecting food is not an act of dependence on God, but a rejection of the good gifts that God has provided.
“Look at the birds of the air;
they do not sow or reap or store away in barns
,
and yet your heavenly Father feeds them
.
Are you not much more valuable than they?”
(M
ATTHEW
6:26).
“O L
ORD
, I have come to you for protection; don’t let me be disgraced. Save me, for you do what is right.”
I am Your child—heal me, O Lord. I give myself to You.
“Turn your ear to listen to me; rescue me quickly. Be my rock of protection, a fortress where I will be safe.”
I am Your child—heal me, O Lord. I give my heart to You.
“You are my rock and my fortress. For the honor of your name, lead me out of this danger.”
I am Your child—heal me, O Lord. I give my will to You.
“Pull me from the trap my enemies set for me, for I find protection in you alone.”
I am Your child—heal me, O Lord. I give my soul to You.
“I will be glad and rejoice in your unfailing love, for you have seen my troubles, and you care about the anguish of my soul.”
I am Your child—heal me, O Lord. I give my life to You.
“Have mercy on me, L
ORD
, for I am in distress. Tears blur my eyes. My body and soul are withering away…I am wasting away from within.”
I am Your child—heal me, O Lord. I give my all to You.
“I am trusting you, O L
ORD
, saying, ‘ You are my God!’”
I am Your child—heal me, O Lord.
(S
EE
P
SALM
31:1-4,7,9-10,14
NLT
)
If we struggle with an eating disorder, we feel we have no control. We conclude, “Food is the only thing I can control—how much or how little I consume.” Yet our deepest need is not
getting
control, but rather
giving
control of our lives to Christ. He is the One who sets us free.
—J
UNE
H
UNT
A
NOREXIA
& B
ULIMIA
: A
NSWERS IN
G
OD’S
W
ORD
Q
UESTION
:
“Why would a person with an eating disorder despise himself?”
A
NSWER
:
“He who ignores discipline despises himself, but whoever heeds correction gains understanding”
(P
ROVERBS
15:32).
Q
UESTION
:
“Why does my appetite work against me and my hunger drive me?”
A
NSWER
:
“The laborer’s appetite works for him; his hunger drives him on”
(Proverbs 16:26).
Q
UESTION
:
“Don’t I have the right to refuse to eat or drink and to do whatever I want to do?”
A
NSWER
:
“Whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God”
(1 Corinthians 10:31).
Q
UESTION
:
“Why, if I put in my mouth one bite of certain foods, do I feel fat, undisciplined, and ‘unclean’?”
A
NSWER
:
“What goes into a man’s mouth does not make him ‘unclean,’ but what comes out of his mouth, that is what makes him ‘unclean’”
(Matthew 15:11).
Q
UESTION
:
“What if I’ve hidden my food and hidden my fixation with food so that people know nothing about my problem?”
A
NSWER
:
“Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account”
(Hebrews 4:13).
Q
UESTION:
“What would I gain if I trusted God and heeded instruction?”
A
NSWER
:
“Whoever gives heed to instruction prospers, and blessed is he who trusts in the L
ORD
”
(Proverbs 16:20).
Q
UESTION
:
“Why shouldn’t I have the right to do whatever I want with my own body?”
A
NSWER
:
“Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own”
(1 Corinthians 6:19).
Q
UESTION
:
“Even though God created everything, isn’t eating food bad for me?”
A
NSWER
:
“Everything God created is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving”
(1 Timothy 4:4).
Q
UESTION
:
“Why would the heavenly Father care about my needs? After all, I’m of no value to Him.”
A
NSWER
:
“Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?”
(Matthew 6:26).