Heart and Snow (Texas Highlanders Ice Hockey) (6 page)

“I’ll help you,” Cody said, trying to stand up, but his long legs caught on the table.

Cherry waved her hand at him. “Nonsense. I can handle a few dishes. Go make sure she’s okay.” She pointed toward the bathroom and then her pointed gaze fell on her other two children. “Maybe Michele and Doug can help me.” Michele groaned but stood up obediently and followed her mother into the kitchen.

Cody excused himself, and went down the hall to where the bathroom door stood closed. He knocked on it lightly. “Jo?” There was no answer at first. “Jo, are you okay?”

“I’m fine” came the muffled sound of her voice. It was shaky, unsure. Was she crying in there? He knew her mother’s opinion of her was important. Was she taking this whole thing too hard?

“Can I come in then?”

“No.” He heard the toilet flush, and a moment later, she opened the door. “She sent you to check on me?”

He didn’t like the dark circles he’d been seeing under Jo’s eyes lately. This pregnancy and the stress was taking its toll on her. “Not exactly. Cherry was worried about you.”

“I just… wasn’t feeling well.”

“Is it…” He looked around, saw no one and sighed. “Can’t we just tell them?”

She shook her head. “I’m not ready to deal with the family crazy over the first grandchild. You have no idea the insanity that will ensue. I just… I’m going to go make an appearance, prove I’m okay, and then I want to go to bed.”

Cody nodded. “Okay.”

“I’ll tell them soon, Cody. I just can’t tonight.”

“All right.” He’d play it her way for now. She knew her family better than he did, and it was her news to tell them. But not telling them was wearing on her, and he didn’t like seeing the stress on her, not to mention it wasn’t healthy at all for a pregnant woman to be stressed out.

As she disappeared into the kitchen, he heard her voice in the kitchen, followed by the slightly lower tone of her mother. He couldn’t hear exactly what they were saying, nor did he try for the moment. He was worried about her. The anger he’d felt a few days ago had melted away. Now that he’d had time to accept that there was a baby inside her, he’d morphed those feelings into anxiety and worry. He didn’t like how tired she looked all the time now.

He walked into the living room, the voices getting louder. He didn’t know where everyone else was. It seemed it was just Jo and Cherry in the kitchen. Cody glanced out the side window and saw the rest of the family outside. It looked like they were catching snowflakes. Ed was nowhere to be seen, which meant he had probably gone off to hide in his room. Lucky bastard.

“Neither of you ate much tonight.”

“It was a long drive, Mom. And Cody is always a little apprehensive when we come out.”

“Is he still nervous here? I thought we squashed that bug. He’s always welcome.” The corners of his mouth quirked up a little. It was still a strange thing to be more welcome at the in-laws than at his own mother’s house. He liked his in-laws though.

“It’s not that, Mom.”

“Then what’s wrong? You were a little short at dinner too.”

“There’s nothing wrong, Mom. Forget it.”

The rattle of dishware rang loud in the house, drowning out what else they might have said. Cody thought about going in, but Jo needed some family time. She was struggling with this baby thing, far more than he’d thought she would. She was always so put together, and seeing her frayed at the edges like this... He wasn’t sure what to do for her.

Sure she might act irritated by her family, but she did love them, and with as much stress as she was under, she deserved to let her mother take care of her.

Hell, he wanted to take care of her too. But her mom was probably in a better position to do that than he was. He was still lost.

*~*~*

Cody pulled out his phone and stared at the display as he walked back toward the bedroom. His dad was calling. Again. He glanced back toward the kitchen. He didn’t want to risk upsetting Jo right now, and she would get upset, seeing as he hadn’t spoken to his father in months. Not that she would be upset with him. She would just worry, and he didn’t want her to do that.

He grabbed his jacket and stepped outside the front door. He didn’t know what the man wanted, but it was clear that he wasn’t going to give up until Cody talked to him. He dialed the number back and waited as it rang.

“I’m glad you returned my call, finally.”

He didn’t miss the snippy tone in his father’s voice, and that just added to his irritation. “What do you want?”

“You’re my son. I can’t call to see how you’re doing?”

“Before you started calling me a week ago, you hadn’t tried to contact me in two years. What do you care how I’m doing?”

“Don’t get all bent out of shape, Cody. I’m calling because I’m moving back to Fort Glasgow.”

Cody sunk to one of the chairs on the porch. He was going to be in the same city as his father? Why? Why was he moving back? “You’re moving back?”

“Yeah. I’ll be in town Christmas Day. I’d like… to see you, if I could.”

Of all the freaking times… “I’m not in town right now. Jo and I, we go to see her parents on Christmas.”

“Oh.” Was that disappointment in his father’s voice? Of course, because he wasn’t getting his way for once. But after two years of silence, Cody wasn’t in the mood to rearrange his schedule for the man. “Well, maybe we can get together for lunch or something when you get back into town.”

“I don’t think that’s a great idea, Dad,” Cody said. Part of him, that nine-year-old boy inside him, really wanted to see his father. Craved it, almost. But the adult in him, the one that spent twenty-five years missing his father, didn’t want it.

“Come on, Cody.”

“Why the sudden desire to spend time with me? You never cared before.”

“That’s not true. I’ve always cared.”

“Right.”

“I just didn’t always have the ability to show you.”

“Ain’t that the truth. I suppose you could never show Mom either. But you sure loved to show the puck bunnies.” Cody’s voice came out as a sneer. He didn’t regret it. It was one of the reasons why he was so sensitive about being lied to. His father had spent years lying to his mother, cheating on her.

“That’s not fair, Cody.”

“It’s totally fair.”

“I’m not that guy anymore.”

“Prove it.”

“I’m trying to! God, Cody, you are just about the stubbornest boy I’ve ever known. Look, meet me for lunch when you get back. We’ll talk and I’ll prove I’m not that man you’re remembering anymore.”

“I should hang up on your ass.”

“But you won’t, because some part of you does want to see me.”

“Fuck you.” There was silence on the other side, and for a minute he thought maybe his father had hung up, but movement on the other line confirmed he was still there. He should have hung up. But the asshole was right. Part of him did want to see his father. “Fine. Lunch. An hour. That’s it.”

“Awesome.”

“Dad, I’m not convinced you’ve changed anything. I still think you’re a selfish asshole.”

“And you’d be right to think it,” his father said. “Let me know when you come back. We’ll set something up then.”

“Fine. Bye.” Cody ended the call without waiting for his dad to say goodbye. Maybe he was being a bit of a petulant kid. But it wouldn’t be the first time that Dad had called wanting something from him, and pretended to reform himself to get it from him.

CHAPTER SEVEN

Jo turned down the covers on the queen-size bed, her stomach still doing circles from dinner. She’d hoped that she was done with the morning sickness, but tonight had proven her wrong. Or maybe it was just stress of keeping it from her family. She wasn’t sure when she’d tell them, only that eventually she’d need to. She just wasn’t ready to spill her guts out. Just her dinner, apparently.

“How’s your stomach, babe?”

She turned toward her husband, his gorgeous blue eyes overflowing with concern. He tossed his shirt on top of the suitcase they’d brought, and watched her. Her eyes trailed from his broad shoulders down his corded biceps across his sculpted chest to the abs she could trace with her tongue and had, many times.

“It’s a bit rough.”

Attraction was never their problem. Their first date had ended up at her apartment, tangled in the sheets of her queen-size bed. But talking to each other… that had been more difficult. They’d really had to make an effort in the first years of their marriage. She’d thought it had gotten better, but this baby thing just outlined why it hadn’t. They just didn’t know how to talk to each other.

He walked over to her, and ran his palms over her arms, up and down. “It hadn’t been easy for us lately, has it?”

Was he a mind reader too? Or was it just written all over her face? She shook her head. “I feel like we failed each other, Cody. “ She plopped herself on the edge of the mattress, crossing her arms. “We didn’t want children. This was not in the plans. Stupid fertile body.”

Cody sat down beside her, one arm placed behind her back on the bed. “You know I’m not really mad at you, right?”

Jo turned her head so she could look at him beside her. God, he had that puppy dog look on his face. The one that always melted her heart, turned her legs into jelly.

“This whole thing has been rough for us. I was frustrated and worried. It’s not that we can’t afford the kid… but I was just caught unprepared. There’s so much more to being parents than money.”

“I know.” She leaned her head on his shoulder. “We both were. I mean, I was on birth control.”

“I don’t want you to get an abortion,” he blurted out. “I get that it’s an option that you’ve considered, and maybe I’m being a horrible husband by not supporting an abortion… I understand if you don’t want the kid. But… we could find a different solution. I mean…” He trailed off with a frustrated grunt.

Jo frowned and tilted her head up to see his eyes. “Cody, who said anything about an abortion?”

The choice might have been right for other couples, for other women, but she knew deep inside it wasn’t right for her. She didn’t have the strength for it.

“No one, I guess. I just thought—”

“Cody, what do you want to do?”

“I-I don’t… I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately about this… I just can’t imagine not having you in my life. And if that comes with a child, then it comes with a child. We’ll do what we need to do together, yeah?”

She nodded. “Okay.” God, this was why she loved him. And yet, something niggled at the back of her consciousness. “You still don’t want a child, though, do you.”

He pulled her into his lap, his strong arms wrapping around her in a protective cocoon. She wrapped her arms around his neck while his hand rested on her back. His arms were safe, warm. She never wanted to leave them. “It’s not that, Jo. We were set with no kids. This is… just… going to take some time. To adjust.”

“I know.” She tried not to sound disappointed. Time was one thing they really didn’t have. This baby inside her was growing. In half a year, it would be there, in the flesh.

Of course, she couldn’t expect him to flip that fast. Even she hadn’t and the baby was inside her. She’d spent a good two weeks in denial, and now… it was more resignation than wanting it. Maybe that made her a horrible person.

He smiled. “Look, obviously, someone up there wanted us to have this kid. So… we’ll adjust our plans to compensate.”

“Okay.” She didn’t have anything else to say. He needed time. She’d give him some. Of course, hopefully, he wouldn’t take the next six months to adjust. They didn’t have that kind of time.

“Now, tell me we’re done fighting about this.”

She chuckled lightly. “I hope so.”

“That sounds like a yes to me,” he said, leaning in toward her. She tilted her head up as his lips brushed hers. His bare chest was warm underneath her fingertips, the light blond hair on his chest tickling her palm.

His mouth opened and his tongue snaked into hers. She welcomed his kiss, relished in it as it had been way too long since they’d been this comfortable with each other.

When they separated, she smiled, the warmth of her emotions filling her. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

“For a while there, I thought—”

She frowned and leaned away from him. This was a hard thing to admit, that maybe at one time…

“I thought maybe you didn’t, anymore.”

“Joey Baker…” Cody cupped her face so she had no alternative but to meet his eyes. “You are my Barbie doll. You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. You’re perfect, in every way. And you’re my wife. I married you because I love you. And soon, you’re going to be the mother of my child. There’s no person more attractive to me. There’s no person I could love more.”

She blushed, sure her face was a deep red. He had no idea how much she needed to hear these things. How many weeks had she toiled over how to tell him and when to tell him, and if she should at all? How was it he still left her breathless with how perfect he was?

“Look, I know you’re afraid. Having a kid is a big thing. I’m scared shitless.”

“You’d make a great dad,” she whispered. That was something she’d long known. But it was something he didn’t believe. She understood why he didn’t, even if she didn’t agree. She’d watched him at the public events, how he was with the kids. He really would be the best dad.

“I’m not so sure. You know about my dad. He was an absent sonovabitch.”

“You’re not your dad.” As if punctuation, she leaned toward him.

His head tilted, and the heat of his lips on hers nearly scalded her. The soft tender kiss grew into a deep, tangling embrace, leaving them both breathless. After a decade of marriage, Cody still had that way of making her lose herself in him. Her bottom pressed against his jeans, the noticeable bulge growing as she wiggled against him.

He pulled the sweater top over her head, and dropped it on the floor. The cool air coaxed gooseflesh out to pepper her skin. Pressing her hand against his blond-dusted chest, she glanced at the closed bedroom door. “What about my family?”

He cupped her chin, and a mischievous smirk took over. “We can be quiet.”

“Since when? Getting caught doing it in my parents’ home isn’t my top thing right now.”