Get In Her Mind, Get In Her Bed (2 page)

As you are out looking for targets, survey the room with your eyes. When you find a girl you like, hold your gaze in her direction. When she looks at you continue to keep eye contact for four to five seconds. If she is interested she will respond, if not forget her and move on to the next target. Once you get that look do not hesitate, approach her and start up a conversation. If you are unsure of the signal, continue to catch her eye about every five minutes, no need to stare. Every time she holds eye contact with you, she reaffirms her interest in you. After the second or third glance, make your move otherwise she will start to lose interest waiting for you.

All body language is important, but eye contact and a little smile will get you far. It tells you, “I’m interested in you and I’m available.” Of course, you will use body language to do a variety of other things such as getting her interested in you, creating and building sexual chemistry, and skewing the interaction in your favor. If you want to be good with women, you need to know it all starts with your eyes.

The Alpha Male

I hear a girl ask Nick, "Hey what’s your friend’s name?" He replied, "Taylor." She continues, "Does he have a girlfriend?" At this point I turn around and say to the mystery woman, "Why don’t you ask his friend?" I ended up dating this girl for few months. I found out from her later that the reason she approached me was the way I walked in. We were in a group with about five other guys and she said we all walked in looking good and having a good time. I distinctly remember her saying, "You walked in like you owned the place." She obviously picked me out of the group, but we all looked like somebody worth getting to know. Based on our body language alone, we were interesting, and appeared to be an attractive fun group of guys.

Body language is king in the game of pick up and in everyday life. Remember only ten percent of what you say comes across in the message, the rest is body language. What you say is directly tied to your body language. If you are displaying confident body language, the dialog in your conversation will be coming out in a confident manner. You won’t be tripping over your words. The words will be seemingly meaningless. They will start to flow out rather than seem generic or rehearsed. You will care less about what you are saying and your conversations will become more fluid.

When I walk, I walk with purpose. I walk with an aire of confidence and a little cockiness. I walk like I am somebody. Some would say I walk around like I think I’m better than everyone else. When I walk into a club or bar, I walk in the same way. If I enter with girls, I am arm and arm with one of them, with the others close by. I walk tall with my head up, chest out, and I am smiling, perhaps even laughing. I am having more fun than anyone there. I walk in with a purpose, like I own the place. If I walk in with a group of guys, I walk in the same way. I walk tall with a confident gait, head up, chest out, and smiling. All of the things I am doing are putting off body language signals that say I am confident, I am interesting, I have something to offer, I am having fun, and I am fun to be around. I enter, and everyone in the bar wants to know me.

Let’s break some of this down. Going places with women, being seen with women, is a good thing. It gives the women observing you peer approval. Meaning that other women will think, “All those girls are with that guy he must be really cool.” The women you are with know you and like you, and are giving their "approval." So if I walk in with women it gives all the other women in the bar approval from my peers. I'll take it one step further by locking arms with them and laughing. Now not only are these girls with me, but they are with me and touching me. On top of that we are laughing and appear to be having an awesome time. So all the girls in the bar, that I will be gaming on later, are already thinking, “This guy must really be interesting, he has girls all over him, they are laughing, he is fun, he has something to offer, I want to meet him.” You portray all that just by walking in the door.

Now if it’s boys night out, I do the same thing but I want to out Alpha Male them. We have taught all of our friends this so we kind of all walk into the bar the same way. It’s kind of a joke now, but again, we all walk in confident, with our shoulders back, heads up, and chest out. We are all usually laughing and joking around, and we all have smiles on our faces. We are showing everyone in the bar that we are about having fun, we are the life of the party, come join in. Now I want to out Alpha Male my friends, but not by making them look stupid, I want to do subtle things that will make me stand out from the group. You always want to be the one that stands out. You want to be the guy that women notice and say to themselves, “There is something interesting about that guy and I’m going to find out what it is."

When most guys are starting out learning how to be an Alpha Male, they make the mistake of not telling their friends about these hidden signals. They fear that if they tell their friends what they know, then there will be too much competition. While this is true to some point, you will see better results by being in a dominant group than you would by being the lone Alpha Male. People hang out in groups. Within the groups there is a pack leader, or Alpha Male. When we go out to bars or clubs we go out in our groups, as does everyone else. The people at the bars and clubs are a big collection of many groups, each with their own pack leader. When we are at the bar not only do we compete against each of the other Alpha Males, but every dominate group as well. The dominate group, is the group women will focus their attention on the most. Within that group they will be looking for the pack leader. Therefore you must teach those that you go out with how to be the dominate group. My group is the one that is seen as the dominate pack. Everyone in the group works together to display confident body language, and all the looks will be heading our way. From here, all you need to do is place yourself as the Alpha Male in the group. When they sit I stand. I might place my hand on their shoulder when I talk to them, or give them a pat on the back when I tell a joke. Both are subtle signals of dominance over the other. We are all there to help each other out, not get in the way.

The first step in becoming an Alpha Male is to carry yourself in this confident manner. This is something you can practice all the time. You don't just flip a switch when you get to the bar and become a confident person. Girls will see right through you. If you want to be better with women you need to make a change in your lifestyle. Start carrying yourself in a confident manner all the time. Even if you are a shy person, if you act confident you will become confident. Have you ever heard the expression fake it till you make it? Same theory applies here. Carry yourself in a confident manner and you will become a confident person. If you exude confidence, you will be perceived as a much more interesting person. This will help you with your career, with your peers, family, everything, not just with girls. If you’re serious about getting better at interacting and picking up women, you need to make a concerted effort to become a more confident person. Women will see you in a whole new light.

The second step in becoming an Alpha Male is learning to claim your space. You want to be seen, the center of attention. So when you are looking for space to claim, move to the center of the room and begin marking your territory. Place your drink down, place a lighter down, place your jacket or coat down. You are sending out the signal, “If you want this space, you are going to have to take it from me!” The more space you take up, the bigger your territory. The more territory you have claimed, the more of an Alpha Male you will be.

Where ever you go, immediately head for the center. Sitting on a couch, walking into the bar, entering a room, it doesn’t matter. Make a direct line with no hesitation. From the moment you walk into a room, all eyes will be on you if you in with a confident manner. Walk tall, shoulders back, chest out, relaxed, with your head up and smiling. This is what we mean when we tell you to walk in a confident manner. You may not notice people looking at you, but they will definitely notice you. The women will think you are interesting and want to get to know you. The guys will all be jealous because they know the attention is on you, and the women find you interesting, not them. The next time you are at the bar, take a moment to watch the girls currently not talking to any other guy. What are they doing? They are watching the door to see who will come in next, to see if the next guy that enters is the one for them. Take your time to get where you are going, there is no rush, let the women see everything you have to offer. Confident body language will carry you. If you have poor body language but have a killer opener and you approach a girl, whether she finds you attractive or not, she will shortly become uninterested. If you have great body language it doesn’t matter what you say, she will be interested. Now obviously you do not want to open her and be tripping over your words, but if you just say the first genuine thing that pops in your mind and have random conversation, your confidence will carry you.

So you have walked into the bar in a confident manner displaying your Alpha Male body language. You have made a direct line for the center of the room, claiming your territory. Now it is time to expand on your space. Start making your rounds, talk to you friends, order a beer. At each stop you make, continue displaying the confident body language. You always want to be on the prowl, looking for extended eye contact from a cute female. This is not a linear process you need to follow step by step. It is a fluid dynamic. You must be ready to pounce at every given opportunity. As you are talking with your friends look around. You may notice a girl that you did not see when you first walked in. She may not have seen you make your entrance, or claim your territory. Therefore, it is important to continuously display these qualities.

If I am standing in a group with my friends, I like to stand with my feet roughly shoulder length apart. You want to take up room to portray dominance in your group. Stand up tall with your shoulders back, and chest out, but in a relaxed fashion. Do not put your hands in your pockets. That is a sign of nervousness. Remember, you are going for confident. Another thing I see people do is hold their beer in front of their chest. Make sure you do not do this. It makes you look small and closed off to conversation; you are putting up a barrier. You want to be taking up a reasonable amount of space and putting out signals that say, “I’m open and inviting.” Point your toes out slightly as opposed to pigeon toed. This may seem like something small with little meaning but it is not. Women notice these things. Something else I like to do that puts out an aire of confidence, is I sort of thrust my hips forward. Not pushed way out looking like a retard but ever so slightly. I lock my thumbs in my belt or pants pockets depending on what I’m wearing and let my hands hang down my legs. I have my fingertips pointed slightly at my cock. This is a confident pose that also appeals to a woman's sexual subconscious.

When you are standing at the bar, waiting for a beer, you want to be scanning the room for potential targets, while at the same time trying to get the bartenders attention. Use the bartender as a guide to how well you are projecting confident body language. They will notice you and serve you well before anyone else. The women around the bar will notice this, so will all the other guys, further strengthening the idea that you are the Alpha Male. Continue to stand tall, make eye contact, and take up space. The bar area is always crowded with people trying to get drinks, it is a true test of your abilities.

Being Alpha Male is about portraying a certain appearance. You don’t have to be the greatest looking guy, the biggest guy, in perfect shape, or even the funniest. It all comes back to your appearance and the message your body language sends out. You want to send out a message of sexuality. You want to scream center of attention, so when women see you they think, “Wow! What is it about this guy that is exciting me? I don’t know what it is but there is something and I want to find out what it is that is so special about this guy.” The ultimate goal is to be able to send out a message of sexuality that makes other guys jealous and arouses a woman’s excitement.

You have to learn to look, think, and act like an Alpha Male. You need to move around and have the body language that screams, “I’m big, I’m bad, you don’t want to mess with me!” Becoming the Alpha Male can be broken down into three categories, size, strength, and attitude.

Becoming Alpha Male: Size

One way to show dominance is by being bigger than everybody. We are raised to believe that bigger is better. Large men appear more powerful and are rated more attractive than smaller men. That doesn't mean you have to be a muscle bound, cock diesel, ape. You just need to learn how to appear large in your own frame. If you are a big guy, learn to move and stand in a way that is large in stature, not fat. If you are a small guy use certain techniques to appear larger.

Standing Tall

Tall men appear more dominant, but why is this? Think about a business meeting, everyone is sitting at the table, with the boss at the head of the table. When the boss talks, he is the only one standing signaling to everyone that he is in charge. When a police officer walks up to your car, you are sitting there waiting for them to walk up to your window. When he gets there he is standing over you. Those are all situations where the authority figure is displaying dominance. Now think of when you eat out at a restaurant, the waiter will bend down, or sit down next to you while taking your order so that they are at eye level with you. They don’t want to be dominate because they want the customer to feel comfortable so they receive better tips. A waiter will portray inferiority.