Gambling With the Crown (11 page)

Emily closed her eyes and somehow managed to fall asleep against the bouncing of the vehicle. When Kadir awoke her later, the first rays of dawn were beginning to peek over the horizon. They drove into the oasis and she was surprised to find it wasn’t empty, as she’d thought it might be, but filled with tents and animals. A couple of dark bodies moved between the animals, feeding them.

Kadir exited the Land Rover and stood beside it. Emily climbed out, her feet landing with a squish in the sand. She walked around to Kadir’s side and stood there as a tall, dignified man in dark robes made his way to them. He was worn and weathered, his face brown and wrinkled with sun and wind. His eyes, however, were dark and glittering as he looked at them both.

Kadir spoke to the man, and his old eyes drifted closed. Then he sank to his knees and intoned something in Arabic. Kadir reached out and touched his shoulder and the man stood again. Soon, other men appeared and the contents of the Land Rover were whisked into a tent set aside from the rest.

Kadir turned to her and held out his hand. Emily slipped her hand into his and let him lead her inside the tent. It was opulent, with colorful carpets blanketing the floor and walls. Copper and gold gleamed on tables and in low cabinets. There were cushions spread liberally across the floor for seating, and a separate area that contained a large bed covered in furs.

The oil lamps were lit and the soft scent of incense wafted to her nose. Someone brought a tray with food and coffee and then disappeared. The man who had greeted them was the last to go and Emily found herself blinking at Kadir and wondering what would happen now. Twenty-four hours in the oasis. For what?

She wanted to go to him, wrap her arms around him and hold him tight, but she didn’t dare. Because she didn’t know if she could stop once she did.

“How are you feeling?” she asked softly.

Kadir spun toward her, his eyes sparking with emotion. “How am I feeling? Trapped.”

It wasn’t quite what she’d expected. “I don’t know what to say to you, other than I’m sorry.”

Kadir closed his eyes and tilted his head back. And then he said something she didn’t understand. When he shook his fist at the top of the tent, she assumed it was probably something she didn’t want to hear anyway. He was angry and emotional and she understood that he needed to vent.

“Do you want to know what the worst part is?” he said suddenly, his gaze hard on hers again. Daring her, maybe.

“What?”

“I think I got what I deserved.”

Emily’s heart squeezed at the raw pain in his voice. “I’m not sure I understand you.”

He shook his head. She didn’t think he would speak, but then suddenly the words tumbled from him. “I am a rotten brother, Emily. And when I tried to make it right again, Rashid did not come. I tried to make sure the throne was his, as it should be, but it no longer matters. My father is dead, Rashid is not here and the council will formally choose me before the world—if my father did not leave a will already proclaiming me heir. He claimed he had not chosen, but I believe he did. I think the old bastard was just manipulating us one last time.”

Emily tried not to be shocked, but she knew she hadn’t succeeded when one corner of his mouth curled in a hard smile.

“I failed to tell you what kind of dysfunctional family I have, didn’t I? Well, here it is—my father is dead, and I don’t feel much of anything at the moment but anger. And not for the reasons you would suppose.” He clenched his hands into fists as his side. “He wasn’t a kind man, or a loving man. He was exacting and proud, and though I loved him when I was a child, I grew to fear him. And then I despised him.”

She couldn’t imagine feeling that way about her father, but her mother was a different story. She’d been angry with her mother for years now.

“If you mean to shock me, you are doing so. But not for the reasons you suppose.”

“You aren’t horrified to your sweet little core that I couldn’t stand the man who left me a crown? That his death doesn’t bother me nearly as much as the situation I now find myself in?”

“I didn’t live your life, Kadir. It’s not my place to decide how you should be feeling right now.”

He laughed. It was a bitter, angry sound. And then he ripped his headdress off and tossed it on the cushions. “Damn, Emily, I wish we’d been more honest with each other a long time ago.”

Her heart beat hard. “That’s not the kind of relationship we had.”

He stalked toward her, stopped before he got too close. He vibrated with suppressed energy. “No, it’s not. But I wish it had been.” His gaze slid down her body, back up again. “I wish I’d noticed what was under those dull suits of yours. I wish I’d taken your hair down years ago and plundered your mouth until you begged me to strip you naked and kiss the rest of you.”

Emily’s breath shortened. “You don’t mean that. You’re just angry and upset—”

He moved closer and her voice died in her throat. All he had to do was reach out and touch her. She found herself wishing he would do so. Holding her breath waiting for him to do so.

And wondering how to say no if he did.

“I am angry, but I’ve wanted you for days now.” He picked up the braid she always wore to bed and undid the elastic while her heart pounded hard. Then he started to unbraid her hair, shaking it loose with his fingers until it flowed over her shoulders and down her back. “I think I’ve wanted you for a very long time.”

Emily swallowed. “Don’t say that. You didn’t look at me twice before Guido—”

“I did look, Emily. I looked a lot. And yes, I brought Lenore home—so many women home—but I looked at you and I wondered what it was about you. Why I was comfortable with you. Why I tried to provoke a reaction out of you. Why it made me happy when you frowned at anyone I was with. Why I looked forward to mornings and you being there—”

Emily cried out as she put a hand over his mouth. She couldn’t bear to think of any of it just now. To think of it ending. “Stop! Don’t say these things. Don’t make me want...”

He took her arm and tugged her closer. His mouth landed on the inside of her wrist, his breath against her skin. A fiery current of need shot down her spine and into her sex as his tongue slid over her.

“Want what, Emily? This?”

He licked her skin again and an answering shudder rolled through her. She had never, not once in her whole life, wanted a man as desperately as she wanted this one. It was crazy but true. She’d had boyfriends, she’d had sex—though not in a very long time—and she knew what it felt like to be wanted and to want.

But oh, God, not like
this.
Not as if every nerve ending she possessed was on fire. Not as if she needed this man to breathe, to survive. Not as if she would never be happy if she didn’t have him.

And yet how could she do this with him and survive it? Because they were finished and she had to walk away soon. No, he would
send
her away soon. He had to. They’d failed and she had to go so he could be king.

“We can’t.” The words were wrenched from her.

He dragged her into his arms then, dragged her hips against his body until she felt the strength of his need for her. His voice was thick. “Why not? Why not just this once?”

Emily put her forehead against his chest, felt the quick beat of his heart. There was nothing she could say except the truth. “Because I’m afraid it will destroy me.”

He pushed her back and searched her gaze. She was too weary to care what he saw there. Did she love him? Maybe she did. She didn’t really know anymore what this feeling was or why it made her so desperate. She’d thought she was afraid of herself, afraid of what she might become if she let her hair down and allowed the sensual creature inside her to emerge from the shell again—but maybe she was afraid of him, of what he could do to her.

To her heart. Oh, she was no match for a man like Kadir. She’d worn her defenses around her like a shield for so long and she’d grown weary. Living with him these last few days had destroyed any pretense she had of not liking him.

He pushed her hair back off her cheeks and cupped her jaw in both his hands. The look he gave her was filled with so many emotions: tenderness, frustration, rage, desire. Finally, he took a deep, shuddering breath before tilting her head down to kiss her on the forehead.

Then he backed away from her and grabbed the headdress he’d tossed aside before striding from the tent.

CHAPTER ELEVEN

T
HE
SUN
SANK
below the horizon again before Kadir returned. Emily shot up from the cushions, her heart in her throat. He’d been gone all day and she’d been worried about him. But no one at the oasis understood her queries for his whereabouts. They brought her tea and food, and left her alone for long hours.

“Kadir.” She somehow managed to say his name even as tears filled the back of her throat. “I was worried about you.”

He looked weary as he waved a hand dismissively. “It is part of the ritual,
habibti.
I have been in prayer from sunup to sundown.”

She let out a shaky breath. “I did not know. I thought...” She shook her head. “Never mind. Are you hungry? One of the women has just brought food.”

“Yes, most definitely.”

“Sit, then. I’ll get it for you.”

He took a seat on the cushions and she brought the tray with meat and cheese and fruit over to the low table in the center. Then she poured cool water into glasses and handed him one.

He took a long drink and set the glass on the table. She refilled it.

“I apologize for not explaining the ritual to you,” he said.

She shrugged and studied the food. What could she say to him? That she’d missed him? That she’d been worried about him? That she’d spent the last several hours filled with regret that she’d pushed him away? “It’s fine. I’m just glad you’re well.”

He reached out and touched her hand and her nerve endings tingled in response, flooding her senses with too much heat, too much emotion. She was such a mess, and all because of him.

“I left rather abruptly. I’m sorry.”

“I don’t know that I gave you any choice.”

“I would never want to cause you pain, Emily.”

“I appreciate that.”

But she hadn’t been able to stop thinking about the things he’d said to her earlier. He’d said he wanted her, that he’d been thinking about her for far longer than she realized. She wanted it to be true, and yet she doubted. But did it honestly matter? Once this was over, once they went back to the palace and he took his place as king, it was the end. She would leave Kyr and probably never see him again.

And that thought nearly doubled her over as fresh pain streaked through her body, curling and writhing in her belly, her limbs. It had been this way each time the thought crossed her mind today. Never see Kadir again? Never hear his voice stroke across the syllables of her name?

It was unbearable. Except that she had to learn to bear it. Somehow.

Emily picked up a handful of grapes. When she plucked one and held it up to Kadir’s mouth, she thought she might melt at the heat flaring in his eyes.

“Emily,” he said softly. “What is this?”

She looked at her hand. “I believe it’s a grape. But don’t quote me on that.”

He snorted softly. But then he leaned forward and took the grape from her fingers with his mouth, his eyes never leaving hers. She plucked another grape and fed it to him, and then another, her heart skipping wildly in her chest.

The next time she fed him, he gripped her hand and sucked her index finger. Emily gasped as her body became a lightning rod. Sweet sensation streaked from her finger down to her sex and her feminine core grew wet as his tongue swirled and licked.

It was perhaps the most innocuously erotic thing anyone had ever done to her.

“You play with fire,
habibti,
” Kadir murmured when he finally let her go. “My control is not so strong right now.”

Her heart raced a little bit faster than before. She could admit the truth, or she could push him away again. “I’m not sure mine is either.”

Insane to divulge such a thing. Dangerous. But if she left this oasis without ever knowing what it was like to be Kadir’s lover, just for one night, she would never forgive herself.

His eyes glittered in his devastatingly handsome face. “What has changed your mind?”

She dropped her gaze, her pulse throbbing hard. “Regret. I don’t want any.”

He put a finger under her chin and brought her head up to meet his gaze. “And what if you regret giving yourself to me?”

“I’ll find that out in the morning, won’t I?” She put her hand on his chest, smoothed his robes against the hard muscles beneath. “Besides, I rather thought we could give ourselves to each other. I didn’t exactly intend to be passive.”

With a growl, he pushed her back on the cushions until her body was beneath his, until the delicious weight of him pressed her down and made her shiver because she knew what was coming next. He spanned her rib cage with his broad hands. “Emily, I ache for you.”

How thrilling it was to hear those words from his mouth.
For her.
“And I for you,” she said breathlessly.

His mouth claimed hers in a hot, wet, deep kiss that made her back arch up off the cushions. “There’s nothing here I want more than you,” he said urgently, kissing her again and again while she moaned and writhed beneath him.

There was nothing—
nothing!
—better than having the full power of Kadir al-Hassan focused on her. Oh, no wonder all those women had lost their minds....

No,
she told herself.
You will not think of that, of them. You will think of nothing but him.

And it wasn’t difficult, not really. Not when his mouth performed such magic on her. He kissed her like a man starved, demanding her passion, her soul. Their tongues met, dueled again and again, sucked each other deep and hard. He found the hem of her shirt and tugged it up and over her head. She thought he would move to her breasts, but he kept kissing her while she wriggled beneath him, flexed her hips and found his hardness. His groan was gratifying.

Emily tried to get her hands beneath his robes, but they were too voluminous and she made a choked sound of frustration. Kadir rocked back on his heels and ripped everything over his head until all that was left was a pair of briefs with a mouthwatering bulge....

Oh my...

“There is nothing in this world more exciting than to have a woman look at me as you are doing right this moment.”

Emily’s gaze flew to his and she realized she’d been staring. Drooling, perhaps.

“You’re a beautiful man, Kadir. Any woman would look at you like I am right now.”

“Yes, but I find it’s more satisfying when it’s you.”

He crawled over her again, lowered all that glorious flesh down onto hers, and she gasped when his naked torso met her skin. She was still wearing her bra and jeans, but right now she wanted to be free of everything and just feel her naked body against his. She ran her hands up his sides, her heart throbbing at the fact she was finally caressing his skin, his muscles.

Kadir was beautifully formed, and he knew it. Right now, she didn’t care that he knew. She only cared that she was finally, finally getting to touch him the way she’d dreamed.

A part of her hated that anyone else had touched him like this. She focused on her hands, on the way her skin was so light against his darkness. He caught one of them and brought it to his lips.

“You are thinking too much, Emily. About other women, other nights. This is about us. There is only you and me here tonight. And there is no one else I’d rather be with.”

She ran her fingers over his sensual lips. “I’ve spent four years escorting women out of your bedroom. You can’t expect me to forget that. Or to forget that I’m no different than they are after all. Wanting you. Craving you. Going mad with the thought of having you.”

His smile was tender. “You are
very
different.” He dipped his lips to her throat and she arched her neck, moaning softly. “Because I am mad with the thought of having
you.
And that, you may rest assured, is not a common occurrence.”

He flexed his hips against her center and she caught her breath at the feelings rolling through her. He made her feel special, though she told herself it was only a line. He was good at this, so good.

“The things I want to do to you, Emily,” he said on a groan. “This night is not nearly long enough.”

He kissed her again, his mouth taking hers in a hard, deep kiss. Emily arched up to him, wrapped her arms around him until he slipped her bonds and pressed openmouthed kisses to her neck, her collarbone, the valley between her breasts. Her bra had a front clasp and he did away with it handily. A moment later, his hot mouth was on her aching nipple. Emily cried out as she arched her back, thrusting herself greedily into his mouth.

He sucked hard and soft, nibbled and bit until her body was on fire. How could so much pleasure come from such a tiny spot? But he didn’t stop there. He did the same to her other nipple until she was writhing on the cushions and panting his name.

When he unzipped her jeans and tugged them down her hips, she had a crazy moment of panic that she was completely naked before him. He knelt and peeled her jeans and panties off and dropped them. His gaze flicked over her and her breath caught in her throat while she waited for him to say something.

“Emily.” He caressed her calves, her knees, the insides of her thighs as he moved over her body again. “So lovely. How stupid I have been not to make love to you before now.”

“It wouldn’t have happened.” She sounded breathless. “Not while I worked for you. And if it had, I would have handed in my resignation.”

He blinked. But he didn’t stop caressing her. “Then perhaps it’s good we have waited.” He pushed her knees apart, his gaze dropping to the juncture of her thighs. “But we have much to make up for.”

He bent and pressed a kiss to the inside of her thigh. Emily’s body felt tight, like a rubber band stretched just under the breaking point. Another inch, and she would snap. Her breath came in tight, shallow little gasps and her skin burned with excitement.

Kadir’s breath against her thigh was hot and moist—and then his fingers found her, his thumb skimming over her clitoris while she gasped.

“You like that,” he murmured.

“Oh. Oh, yes.”

He did it once more, and again her body tightened. “And what will you do if I lick you, Emily? Will you come for me?”

She was so aroused it physically hurt. Her body throbbed with pain and need and all she wanted was for him to ease the ache. She nodded, unable to speak.

His grin was wicked—and beautiful. He pushed her thighs farther apart. And then he bent and licked the wet seam of her sex.

Emily’s back arched off the cushions as if someone had touched her with a live wire. The sound coming from her throat was high-pitched and desperate.

And she didn’t care. She wanted more. She wanted everything.

Kadir tongued her again and again, until she was fisting giant handfuls of cushion and panting his name. She was so, so close, her body wound tighter than any spring ever could be—but Kadir was skilled and he knew how to keep her from soaring over the edge.

“Kadir,” she begged. “Please.”

He stopped abruptly, getting to his feet while she cried out. She lay there in shock while he walked out of the room. But then he was back, ripping open a condom and shoving his briefs down before rolling it onto his thick length.

Emily’s heart beat harder as he stretched out over top of her again, pressing her into the cushions. His hand went between their bodies, stroked the bud of her sex.

“I have to be inside you, Emily. The first time you come with me, I want to feel it happening.”

He captured her mouth, his tongue sliding deep. He tasted like her and it made her feel wildly possessive. She kissed him harder and he responded with a surge of passion that left her breathless.

A moment later, she felt the head of his cock and she reached between them, both to touch him and to guide him into her. He stiffened as she wrapped her hand around him, and then he groaned when she pumped her fist over him once, twice.

In response, he hooked an arm behind her knee and spread her wide before plunging into her. Emily tore her mouth from his as a scream erupted from her throat. Her body was so ready for him, so primed and on edge, that she came immediately, shuddering around him while he rocked into her in short, quick strokes that dragged out her release.

“That’s it,” he said thickly. “Like that. Lose yourself in it, Emily.”

It had been so long since she’d had an orgasm that it seemed to last and last and last. But it ended finally and she went limp beneath him. He kissed her cheeks, her nose, her jaw.

“You needed that.”

She managed a laugh. “Yes.”

He was still deep inside her, his body as hard as stone. “Has it been a long time?”

She moved her hips, surprised when fresh fire streaked through her. “There was no time for dating while working for you.”

He spanned her hip with a broad hand and shifted her upward before stroking into her again. She moaned with pleasure.

“I am very glad for this,” he said tightly. “I cannot imagine you with anyone but me.”

He moved hard inside her then, branding her with the strength of his possession. Emily wrapped her legs high around his back, locking her ankles as he drove into her harder and faster, building the tension all over again. She didn’t think her body could respond so quickly to this fresh assault on her senses, but once again she was surprised by how well Kadir seemed to know her.

Their bodies strained together, rising and falling and melting, over and over, until Emily couldn’t hold on another moment. She spun out of control with a cry, falling off the edge and into the blackness below. She thought she might have sobbed his name, but she couldn’t be sure. Her every sense was suddenly overwhelmed with pleasure—and love so sharp it sliced her to ribbons inside.

“Emily,” he said in her ear, his voice urgent and tight. And then it broke as he found his own release, his body shuddering deep inside hers. He said her name again, but it cleaved in half with a groan.

She lay beneath him, stunned with the intensity of everything she was feeling. She was wrapped in his heat and the scent of sex, her body shuddering, her pulse pounding. All her worst fears had come true, in spite of her caution.