“
Can I see you
again?”
I smiled. “I will return.”
He took a deep breath, satisfied. “I’ll be
waiting.”
As I turned to go, I realized I hadn’t asked
any of the important questions that had been nagging me. I’d have
to try harder tomorrow, stay on task. I ran back to the castle at
full speed.
Ruby cleared her throat and
I shoved the book into my pack. I glanced over at her but she was
still facing out the window. Chevelle walked in and I flushed as
the memory of his touch came back. Ruby threw him a wicked smile
and then left the room.
Great
.
“
Ready to resume training?”
he asked.
It was worse than I’d thought. He beckoned so
I stood in compliance.
I wobbled.
He was there in a second, steadying me. I
hadn’t stood since the incident and my head spun a little. He
looked concerned so I shook it off. “I’m fine… really.”
He took a step closer and I became wholly
aware of his hands at my waist. The grip he’d used to steady me
became softer and yet, at the same time, his fingers tightened
around me. My breath hitched as he pulled me against him, the
length of our bodies touching.
Black spots swirled in front of my eyes. I
fought to stay focused on his face, so close. His eyes grew
troubled and then he blurred out of vision as I went limp in his
arms.
“
Frey… Frey…”
I was looking at the sky when I opened my
eyes. “What happened?”
“
You seem to have blacked
out,” Chevelle said. I thought I saw a hint of a smile on his
face.
I flushed. He must have seen that coming,
held me because of it, to prevent me from falling on my face. I was
an idiot.
I tried to stand again and he helped me up,
this time holding me only by one arm. I took a deep breath. “I’m
okay now, I think.”
He smirked.
I attempted every type of magic he could come
up with, to no avail. I was beyond frustrated. Worse, I could tell
he was being gentle on purpose, afraid I would break. I thought of
what he’d said before, the dangers of messing with the
bindings.
He must have read it on my face. “That’s
enough for now. Rest, Freya.”
I didn’t argue.
Ruby came in, as if on cue, and Chevelle
excused himself. I laid down but irritation kept me from sleep. I
returned to the book.
I spent the next several weeks visiting him.
I had forgotten about the rest of the camp. He had become
absolutely infatuated with me and I couldn’t keep myself from
indulging him. I was thoroughly enjoying it, reveling in it if I
was honest with myself.
He persisted in trying to touch and kiss me
anytime I was close enough to allow, and I let him sometimes.
He surprised me one evening, when he knew it
was time for me to leave, grabbing my wrist and holding me there. I
was stronger than him but I didn’t resist his pull as he spoke
fervently. “Don’t go.”
I smiled. “I will return tomorrow.
Early.”
“
No,” he said, flush with
emotion. “I don’t ever want you to go.”
I laughed lightly and he drew me closer.
“Stay with me.”
I started to pull away and he reached up,
placing his hands on either side of my face, feverishly now. “Marry
me, Lizzy.” I had long since gotten used to the name, but I wasn’t
sure he was talking to me at first. Just the thought of it seemed
so ridiculous. I stopped myself from laughing; knowing from
previous experience this would hurt him, wound his fragile
emotions. I had come to realize he didn’t know what I was. He knew
I was different, of course, knew of the magic, though I’d shown him
nothing of my real power. But he didn’t understand I was an elf. I
didn’t explain, knowing it would do nothing but perplex his simple
mind. He merely thought I was something special, extraordinary.
Beauty and magic and something beyond. But did he actually think I
was human, marriable? I was incredulous.
But he was obsessed. The moment it slipped
from his lips, he became more focused on that than anything else.
Making me his bride. I couldn’t understand.
He tried to explain. “I want you, forever. I
need you, Lizzy.” The yearning in his voice was clear on the last
part and I was surprised that I ached for him a little, felt for
his pain and need. He touched me then and I thought I understood
when he continued, “We could be together…”
Marriage. Yes, he wanted to join us. I bit my
lip, undecided. Curiosity was there, too. And I couldn’t help but
imagine. He was unmagical. He had no idea what I could do to him,
for him, in such an intimate setting. What could it hurt, really?
Sure, I could marry him, but it wouldn’t be real, I knew that. But
the other part, well, I could do that without the marriage,
couldn’t I? Harmless fun…
I smiled as I leaned closer to him. This was
the first time I had initiated a kiss and he was grateful, more
than grateful… overwhelmed with pleasure. I laughed to myself at
what was to come, if this small, insignificant gesture brought him
so much happiness. Our lips touched and he gasped, and then the
breath turned to a low moan.
I flushed. The encounter was
very…
descriptive
.
I threw a wary glance over my shoulder, making sure Ruby was still
at the window as I continued.
The days we had spent coupling had done
nothing to diminish his desire. If anything, they had enflamed it.
And his obsession with marriage increased tenfold. I had not met
his family, but one morning when I arrived at the patch of forest
where we met, he proudly presented his mother’s wedding gown, a
gift for me. He wanted me to wear it, in our ceremony. I had never
actually agreed to the union, but I continuously avoided telling
him it was not possible. It would be only valid in his mind. But
then again, what would that hurt?
I accepted the dress from him, looking it
over. It was poorly made and ill fitting, but had potential as a
design. I sat, using magic to work on the seaming and arrange the
pearl strands and beading in a more pleasant pattern while deciding
how best to deal with him. He was watching me intently. “We will
have such prosperity. Think of it, with your magic, we will be able
to conquer anything. Whatever we need, whatever we want, it will be
nothing but a flick of your wrist.”
I froze. It was irrational, I knew, but anger
seethed. I couldn’t stop myself from thinking he was just like
everyone else. My powers. My magic. And how it would benefit him. I
turned to him, glaring, and he drew back, startled by my sudden,
intense fury. “Is that what you want, why you are so intent on
marrying? For my power?”
He shook his head, mystified, but regret was
still plain on his face for whatever he’d unintentionally done to
cause it. The rage had overtaken me, though. The weeks of drugging
Rune, sneaking out, my missing father - searching for a new wife I
was sure - all of it too much. I slipped. A small crack in my
stability let out enough magic to hurt him. I didn’t hit him, but
the surrounding trees and rocks were pulverized and I knew I had
done too much. He stared back at me… afraid.
I turned and ran without another word.
Straight back to the castle, home. In these few short weeks I had
started to think of it less as a home and more as a prison. My
limited freedom made me ache for more, my time with this human had
felt like living. This was wrong. I would return to him tomorrow,
set things right. As I ran, I realized I was still carrying the
dress with me. I couldn’t understand why I had bothered dragging it
along, but my grip on it was tight. I rolled it up, tucking it
under my arm as I approached the castle. My prison.
Prison
. I pushed the book into my pack and finally slept.
When I woke, I felt better. Stronger. I was
hopeful this applied to my magic as well. Chevelle sat quietly
against a wall, watching me. He seemed to recognize the change in
my mood.
“
Feeling better?”
I nodded. “I think I’d like to train
again.”
“
That is probably a good
idea. We’ll be leaving soon.”
I didn’t know if I
was
that
much
better.
“
Don’t worry. It is safe.
They will not attack again so soon.”
“
When?” I could hear the
worry in my tone, despite his assurance.
“
We will protect you,
Frey.”
Sure. I may have rolled my eyes.
“
We knew they were following
before. Our mistake was in assuming they meant physical attack. We
will not allow them so close again.”
“
So they’re still
following
?”
Panic.
“
No. Not now.” He paused.
“They have accomplished what they came for. Now they will regroup
and return. Which is why we need to move.”
“
Why would we leave a
fort?”
He laughed. “Trust me, Frey.” I must not have
appeared convinced. “Please,” he added.
I sighed. What choice did I have? And then I
laughed. I couldn’t even trust myself.
I expected him to look at me like I was nuts.
Instead, he looked like it was… endearing. He stood and walked over
to me, taking my hand to help me up. When he touched me, I tried to
fight the flush that ran up my neck. When I couldn’t, it
embarrassed me and caused my cheeks to color as well. I peered up
at him through my now dark bangs and could have sworn it amused
him. I laughed at myself, the silly romance I’d been reading in the
diary must have been affecting me.
I tried to stop my thoughts from returning
there as we practiced, but it was near impossible. He kept working
close with me, touching me. I knew I should have been focusing on
the magic, but it was useless. Each day ended with nothing but
frustration and exhaustion, naught to look forward to but leaving
the safety of the fort. But the book provided escape…
The moment I entered the castle, I knew
something was wrong. I had gone in through the servants’ quarters,
desiring to keep a low profile. When they saw me, they did not have
the standard reaction (pretending not to). Instead, fear crossed
their faces and they disappeared from sight. As I made my way
through the corridors, I found them turning away from me, ditching
into doorways. My heart sped. I wondered if something had gone
wrong with Rune’s spell this time. I decided to go check on him. I
realized I was running.
As I rounded a corner heading to the practice
rooms, I ran into something hard. The impact didn’t knock me down,
but the shock almost did. It was one of Father’s guards… one of the
guards he’d taken with him.
He had me by the arm, dragging me along
before I could think. I couldn’t decide whether to run, whether to
fight. And then we were in the throne room. My father’s face was
indescribable, his fury almost tangible. I couldn’t bring myself to
look away from him, but I saw Rune standing in my peripheral. I was
caught, completely busted. I frantically searched for some
explanation before he spoke. But he didn’t speak. He flipped his
arm, dismissing me. The tension showed in that small movement and I
blanched. I started to pull away from the guard but he didn’t
release me. I realized then I hadn’t been dismissed… it had been a
direction for the guard. He wrenched me beside him, jerking
unnecessarily, and then shoved me through the door to my room. I
listened but his steps did not recede. I tried the door; it was
already bound.
I threw myself on the bed. I felt absolutely
wretched. Actually, I felt worse than that, I felt as if I’d been
poisoned. The room spun and I heaved over the edge of the
mattress.
When I woke late the next morning, I was
covered in sweat. My head spun as I stood, but I steadied myself
and moved to the basin to splash my face. As I looked in the mirror
at my pallid complexion, my features twisted in horror.
Understanding came suddenly and would not be
denied. I scoffed at myself humorlessly as my words taunted me…
just harmless fun... what could it hurt? For half a second, I
wanted to scream. And then my hands found their way to my stomach
and rested there.
I felt a sharp intake of breath. I hadn’t
noticed I had gotten so deeply involved in the story.
I was unnaturally calm when they finally came
for me. I knew they would know right away, recognize the obvious
signs. But it didn’t matter now. I walked forward, resigned to my
fate.
What I didn’t expect was their response. The
throne room was full. And not one of them did not gasp when
comprehension hit. But my father, and each of those present,
seemed… pleased when they saw me. I had been resigned to my fate…
but now, now they were pleased. They had no idea there was a… a
human… growing in the belly my hands now cradled. I listened as
their voices began, and then rose, clamorously discussing the news
and what it could bring. I cringed as their words turned to the
possibilities, the power I might pass down, the strength the new
one might bring.
“
We will leave at daybreak,”
I heard Grey inform Ruby as I read. Perfect. The news brought on a
new round of worry so I went back to the book.
Eventually, my father did seek to find out
who the father was. I refused to tell him anything and he could not
force me in my condition. I could see his plans for it already
forming. I was almost happy it would not be powerful, half human
and unmagical. I wondered if it could even be brought to term, I
was ill so often now. The elders discussed it constantly, so
unusual to be sick but it must have been a result of the pregnancy.
Several of them were assigned to watch me and I had to listen to
their incessant chatter. They seemed thrilled not to know how or
when I had gotten this way, carrying on about young elves and their
quests.