Before Linder could
respond, the server handed him two ice cream cones, Caroline claimed
hers, and the deputy stepped up to the counter to order.
Caroline and Linder
retraced their steps along Main Street, stopping from time to time to
window shop and chat about what they would buy if they had all the
money in the world. At the corner of Center Street, as they waited
for the traffic light to turn green, Caroline changed the subject.
“Do you believe in
ESP?” she asked, gazing up to register his response.
“Do you mean things
like mind-reading and predicting the future?” Linder responded.
“Yeah, or finding
stuff that’s lost,” Caroline added. “I do that for my mom all
the time. She’s always losing things. Keys, especially.”
“Well, I’m not so
good at finding lost objects,” Linder answered, “but I’m pretty
good at reading people. And I’ve had some dreams of the future that
came true. So, I guess that makes me a believer.”
“I get dreams like
that sometimes, too,” Caroline agreed. “Now and then they seem
even more real than life. And they often come true, too. But mom
hates it when I tell her about them. She never wants to hear the
future, even when it’s good. She says it creeps her out.”
Linder laughed. “It’s
just the opposite with me,” he said. “I want to know the future
whether it’s good or bad. Probably more when it’s bad. Because if
I can’t change things, I want to prepare for them. So, tell me,
have you had any special dreams lately?”
“Yes, and you were in
one,” she answered. “From the moment I saw you outside our old
apartment, I knew you were going to change things. And I think you
already are.”
Linder gave an uneasy
laugh. For an instant, he thought of telling Caroline about the dream
that had led him to her mother, but decided against it.
“And how do you feel
about that?” he asked her. Does it creep you out?”
Caroline shook her head
and gave him a knowing smile.
* * *
In the days that
followed, Linder stayed rent-free in Jay Becker’s spare room in
return for keeping the apartment clean, handling household chores and
cooking an occasional meal. This suited Linder quite well, as it
enabled him to save more of his salary and kept him fully occupied
during the evenings when Jay worked late. The two men grew closer
week by week as Linder took on more responsibility at the plant and
Jay came to rely on him to handle special assignments. All the while,
Linder noticed a restless energy in Jay not unlike his own, and
wondered whether Jay’s brief time in the camps might continue to
haunt him.
Once or twice a week,
Linder dropped by the 50th Street bungalow to visit Mrs. Unger. When
he did, he sometimes crossed paths with Patricia, who greeted him
politely but kept her distance. According to Mrs. Unger, Patricia
took her work at the truck depot very seriously, paid off the back
rent promptly to her former landlord, and caught up quickly on her
rent payments to Mrs. Unger after receiving an unexpected promotion.
Her life and that of Caroline had seemed to stabilize.
Though Linder remained
determined to earn Patricia’s and Caroline’s trust, he took pains
not to impose himself on them. Now and again, he would catch sight of
mother and daughter together in town, and whenever he did, it took
his entire force of will not to approach them. Before long, he came
to realize that, though Patricia had rejected him long ago and later
married two other men, he had still not shaken off his infatuation
with her. He knew, however, that even with Roger Kendall missing and
very likely dead, he had virtually no chance of winning her heart.
The sad truth was that, once having decided to enter her life as
Mormon Joe Tanner, he dared not confess it or she had every right to
recoil from him in disgust, not only for his role in her capture, but
for having opted twice to conceal it.
His penance, he
reasoned, would be to follow Patricia at a distance and serve her as
best he could. A week later, that service began in earnest. Early
Wednesday evening, Mrs. Unger telephoned him to report that she had
found an empty gin bottle hidden in the trash, and two other full
ones cleverly secreted around the bungalow. Worse than the clear
violation of the house rules, Patricia had risen late that morning,
oozing alcohol from every pore, and had departed late for work. If it
happened again, the landlady said, it was only a matter of time
before others noticed it and Patricia’s job would be in jeopardy.
While Mrs. Unger didn’t want to evict mother and daughter, she felt
she must do something more than stand by while Patricia’s life
careened out of control.
“Until now, have you
noticed any other evidence that she’s been drinking?” Linder
asked.
“Sometimes she comes
home a bit wobbly or with liquor on her breath, but nothing
scandalous,” the landlady replied. “And if she brought home any
bottles before, she must have been a genius at hiding them.”
“Has anything
happened lately to push her over the edge? Was there a fight with
Caroline, or a problem at work?”
“No, but an envelope
arrived in the mail yesterday from the Corrective Labor
Administration,” Mrs. Unger went on. “She took it into her room
to read it and when she came out, she seemed very upset and left the
house for several hours. She didn’t return until just before
Caroline’s bedtime and we were both very worried for her.”
“As you should be.
Where is Patricia now?” Linder asked.
“She and Caroline are
out grocery shopping. They’re due back any minute and I’m not
sure quite what to do about it.”
“Would you like me to
come over?” Linder offered. “After all, I introduced Patricia to
you, so I feel responsible.”
“Nonsense, Patricia
is a grown woman and she’s fully responsible for her own actions,”
the landlady responded. “You’ve shown her and her daughter
nothing but kindness ever since you found them. No, I just wanted you
to know what’s going on. It’s up to me to take Patricia aside and
warn her what will happen if I find another bottle. Frankly, I’ve
also been considering taking Patricia to an AA meeting, if she’ll
have it. Those people saved my late husband’s life, bless their
hearts. Maybe they can help her, too.”
The next afternoon,
Linder left work early to visit Mrs. Unger before Patricia and
Caroline came home. Over coffee, the landlady reported that the
warning had gone well, and that Patricia had promised not to bring
any more alcohol into the house. But even more significantly, she had
shared the reason for her drinking binge two nights earlier. The
envelope from the CLA had contained a postcard sent to her former
address in Coalville. The postcard was from her husband, who had been
transferred some days earlier from the Yukon to the men’s division
at Kamas. Though alive and well, Roger Kendall was now trapped inside
a camp under siege.
Patricia had then gone
on to tell Mrs. Unger of her own ordeal in the Kamas camp, and how
she had managed to protect her daughter from the worst of the abuses
there, but only because the DSS had singled them out for some kind of
protected status.
The landlady was about
to offer more detail when Patricia entered the kitchen, looking pale
and exhausted. Her eyes seemed vacant and unfocused, as if her mind
were far away. When Linder exchanged concerned looks with Mrs. Unger,
the landlady’s eyes seemed to brim with tears at seeing Patricia in
such a weakened state. To their relief, Caroline remained outside on
the porch.
Patricia mumbled
something to herself before apologizing for not having bought
groceries on the way home.
“I’m not feeling
very well just now,” she remarked. If you’ll excuse me, I think I
might lie down for a bit.”
“Why don’t you let
me pitch in?” Linder offered. “How can I be helpful?”
“If you really want
to be useful, you could go with Caroline to the food store,”
Patricia responded in a weary voice. “She has the shopping list.”
As Patricia left the
kitchen, Mrs. Unger followed her out of the room with her eyes and
bit her lower lip to avoid revealing the depth of her unease. A
moment later, Caroline stepped into the room.
“There’s been a
substitution in the lineup,” Linder announced in a cheery voice.
“I’ll be filling in for your mother at the grocery store. Do you
have the shopping list?”
Caroline brightened.
“Sure do,” she
chirped. “I’ll get the money from Mom.”
“No, let her rest.
She can pay me back later,” Linder answered, and led Caroline back
outside. In truth, he looked forward to spending some time alone with
Caroline. Though she could be sullen and irritable at times, when she
was away from her mother, she seemed delightfully levelheaded and
resilient for a girl of fourteen. As they passed out of view from the
bungalow, Caroline slowed her pace and looked up at him.
“Do you mind if I ask
you a personal question?” she asked.
“Shoot,” he
answered.
“How did you happen
to be hanging around that day when our old landlord picked a fight
with my mother over the rent?” Caroline inquired. “And why have
you done so much to help us? I know my mom is good-looking and all
that, and you’re both about the same age, but there’s got to be
more to it. Did you two maybe know each other from before?”
“Have you asked your
mother that question?”
“Yes,” Caroline
answered. “She told me to ask you.”
Linder smiled.
“Well, if your mom
says it’s okay, I guess I can tell you,” Linder replied. “But
you’ll have to promise not to tell anyone else. Can you do that?”
“Absolutely!”
Caroline agreed.
“All right, then,”
Linder began. “A long time ago, when your mother and I were around
your age, we both lived in Cleveland and went to the same ballroom
dance class after school. Whenever we had a choice of dance partners,
I picked your mother and she chose me.”
He went on to describe
how he had lost contact with Patricia when she left for boarding
school and ended the story with their chance encounter at the dance
in Concord. By that time they had reached Main Street and were only a
couple of blocks from the food store. It was not yet dusk and, as the
night was balmy, more people than usual were on the street. In a few
minutes their conversation would no longer be private.
“Okay, then, so you
two did know each other from before,” Caroline noted impatiently.
“But how did you find us here?”
“Are you ready for a
shocker?” Linder asked, stopping short of the curb.
“Go for it!”
Caroline urged.
“About a month ago, I
had one of those special dreams you and I talked about,” Linder
confided in a low voice. “In that dream I saw your mother in some
sort of classroom and got the sense that the place wasn’t very far
away. So, I started searching in all the places I thought she might
be. And the last place I looked was right here in Coalville. I found
her looking exactly as she looked in my dream, right down to her blue
jeans, white blouse, and ponytail ribbon. So, what do you think: ESP
or coincidence?”
“Wow!” Caroline
exclaimed. “Does Mom know about your dream?”
“Not really,”
Linder answered with a sheepish smile. “I thought it might creep
her out.”
Caroline threw her head
back and laughed.
“It might if she
heard it from you,” she said. “But would it be okay for me to
tell her?”
“If you want,”
Linder replied. “Just be sure the two of you are alone, okay? If
anyone else knew, it might be kind of embarrassing.”
Caroline agreed and
then suddenly fell silent. At that moment Linder offered Caroline his
arm as they stepped off the curb to cross the street. She took it
with a faraway look and released it on reaching the far curb. A
moment later, the teen let out a deep sigh and spoke slowly, as if
revealing something for the first time.
“When I was little, I
remember how Mom used to be so calm and sweet and kind to everyone.
Then, when Dad died and we had to leave Cleveland during the
fighting, everything changed. Mom hated London from the moment we got
off the plane, even though granddaddy was there to take care of us.
That’s when she started to drink a lot. It got better when she met
Roger, but then the drinking started up again and became even worse.
When Roger asked her to stop, she just hid it from him.
“And then Roger
started having problems at the bank and had to travel a lot. Around
that time, we noticed men following us around and Roger said the way
to fix everything was to make peace with the government and move back
to Cleveland. But Mommy thought that was a terrible idea. So we all
went to see Granddaddy in Beirut and that’s when everything really
went to…”
Caroline’s voice
broke and her walking slowed and Linder saw tears welling in her
eyes, as if she were reliving the experience.
“I know, but that’s
all finished now,” Linder interrupted. “You don’t need to think
about it any more. Just leave it alone until you’re older. Right
now you’ve got enough to do just growing up.”
“That’s what mom
and my teachers keep telling me,” Caroline replied in a small, sad
voice. “But I have to think about it sometimes or nothing makes
sense. I mean, I know life is unfair, but why can’t it be unfair in
my favor once in a while?”
Linder laughed and gave
Caroline’s small hand a gentle squeeze. They were less than half a
block from the grocery store.
“When you get the
answer to that one, be sure to let me know. Now, is there anything
else on your mind or shall we buy some food for dinner?”
“We can go in now, if
you want,” she continued, though her thoughts did not yet seem
settled.
“What is it?” he
asked.
“It’s just that…
Something’s not right about my mom any more.”