Disillusion Meets Delight (10 page)

“Natalie, how could you forget to call him?  That would be all I’d be thinking about the whole morning!  Actually, that is all I’ve been thinking about!  I have been waiting for you to call and tell me what’s going on!” 

“Mya, you’re crazy.  What is Kyle doing?  Is he back from Seattle?”  I ask, hoping to change the subject to something less focused on me.

“Yeah he got back a couple hours ago.  It’s Sunday, which means football.  Yuck!  He does this dumb fantasy football thing where he and his friends bet or something.  I don’t know, I don’t get it but Kyle loves it.  I guess it’s a guy thing.  I told him he could only have one football day a week.  So, Sunday I spend all day studying and then he has to pamper me on Monday nights.  I told him if the Seahawks played then he could get out of it though.  I’m not a total hag.”  Mya cackles.  They are so domestic.  They moved in with one another a few months ago and to listen to the stories, one would think they had been married for years.  It’s kind of amusing actually. 

“Anyway, stop changing the subject.  Are you calling that hot guy or not?”  Mya asks, not missing a beat.  I see that I will not be able to avoid this.

“What if he was drunk, Mya?  Maybe he doesn’t even remember.”  I reply, hoping that as I talk myself out of calling, Mya will jump on the bandwagon.

“Natalie Everett, it will be fine.  What do you have to lose, a night watching Golden Girls?  Please!  You are calling him and that is final.  Call me and let me know what happens.  Oooh this is so fun!  I’m so excited for you.”  Mya squeals.  “Now that I’m practically married, I don’t get this anymore.  First dates, first kisses-wondering if this might just be the ‘one.’  I kind of miss it.  I need to live vicariously through you now!”  As she continues, I can hear Kyle in the background shouting at the television.   

“Well, if I’m going to call I need to get off the phone with you.  I will call you with all the details.”  And with that, I ended my conversation with Mya to now psyche myself up to call hot Ben Affleck guy.  It is irrelevant how old you are or how many guys you have called in your lifetime, the first time you have to call a guy; it is just like being in 8
^th
grade again.

I paced the floor for about five minutes trying to figure out my approach.  After another ten minutes more, I evoked enough nerve to call, only to get his voicemail.  Of course, he is probably screening his phone calls because he knows that the desperate girl he met last night will inevitably call him.  Well, I called and that was the hardest part.  I left a message, simply saying hi and put the ball in his court.  I hate it when the ball is in their court.  A guy in control leaves too much opportunity for female neuroticism.  Perhaps it is simply Natalie Neuroticism, I don’t know, whatever it is, I don’t care for it and try to avoid it at all costs! 

I really have no motivation to do anything remotely active so I plop myself down on my IKEA sofa, ready to watch Ocean’s Eleven.  I decided that the best remedy to not think about hot men who don’t call is a movie with other hot men who would never call me because I am not a supermodel or movie star.

I sometimes wonder what would happen if I ever met a hot famous celebrity.  Maybe suddenly I would run in the same circle (don’t ask me how, that part of the fantasy is too complicated.)   Would Ewan McGregor see all of my fabulous qualities and forget that I am an ordinary chick with a maxed out credit card?  You know, I really think he would.  Yes, he would completely disregard any shortcomings I may have and totally fall in love with me.  I just need to get the chance to show him what I have.  We would stare into each other’s eyes and begin to sing love songs together, just like Moulin Rouge, without the courtesan part, of course.  Granted, I know in real life, he may be married but it’s my fantasy and that is where all hot famous men are eternally single, waiting for me-even Freddie Prinze Jr.  Oh yes, it’s true.  I will always love him.  He’s adorable.

The amusement of my delusions took my mind off of the phone call to the point that I had forgotten that he was even supposed to call me back.  You can imagine my surprise when the phone actually rang.  I had convinced myself that he wouldn’t call me because, let’s face it, they rarely follow through.  However, I hadn’t slept with him yet, which
does
increase the possibility quite a bit.  It’s getting the call afterwards that is usually slim to none.  Not that I have ever experienced that!  Well, if we’re going to be delusional, then I can just say that I’m a virgin and be done with it!  I know, who am I kidding?  Stop the insanity and answer the phone!

“Hello?”  I answer in my most aloof manner. 

“Hey, how’s it going?”  He asked with a slow, deep tone.  His voice was somewhat hoarse, as though he smoked too many cigarettes last night and was now reaping the consequences.  It was sexy though.  My stomach fluttered.

“I feel like I was run over by a bus, but apart from that, life is grand!  How are you feeling?” 

“I didn’t get up until an hour ago.  I just got out of the shower.  In fact, I’m standing in my boxers right now.”  He laughed.  The image of that hot piece of man standing in the middle of his room in boxers, wet black hair and glistening skin almost made me, well, you can just imagine. 

“So, I was thinking about going to see that new Tom Cruise movie.  Are you up for it?”  He was so confident and casual.  Although the mere thought of him made me flush, I was quite comfortable talking to him.  Perhaps his calmness helped me relax or it could have been the high that I felt from euphoria.  Regardless, I was going to the movies with an absolutely yummy man and it was about time!  Apart from a wretched blind date I went on a few months ago, I had not been out with a guy for close to nine months, which means I had gone without other necessities as well.  I was about ready to explode and in dire need of male attention.

“Well, what time were you thinking?”  Someone once told me that a woman shouldn’t seem
too
available when making plans with a new man.  The game is so difficult sometimes.  You can’t seem
too
eager, but you want the guy to know that you are still interested.  You want to go do things with him, but not
too
often because he will think you are at his disposal.  Why does it have to be so complicated?  Why can’t we just say,
“I like you, you like me, let’s hook up.  I will call you when I say I will and if I think it’s not going to work out, I will let you know instead of stringing you along and sleeping with you at least once.”  
Of course, that would be boring and I know that any man like that would lose my interest in about an hour.  No, I like to go for the ambiguous and horny male that loves me and leaves me. 

“There is a movie starting at 6:15 at the Cornell Cinemas.  That’s close to our neighborhood.  So, how about you meet me at 6:10?” 

“Um, okay.  Well, don’t you think that’s kind of pushing it close?  I mean, no, that’s fine.  I’ll be there at 6:10.”  God, Natalie, don’t let him know you are a neurotic freak by the first date!  You can handle the possibility of maybe walking into the theater as the lights go down.  Be cool!

“Tell you what.  I will get there at 6:00.  I’ll be there playing video games with the other 13 year old kids.” 

“Okay, sounds good.  I’ll see you later.”  Oh my god what am I going to wear?????  
  

Mya came over to help me put together some potential ensembles.  Apparently, Kyle was so absorbed with football that he hadn’t said more than a few mumbles to her all day.  She was studying for a test on Monday but was so annoyed with her boyfriend’s behavior that she couldn’t concentrate.  My desperate call was music to her ears. 

“Okay Nat.  I think you should wear your black skinny jeans with your black Nine West stiletto boots and the long red v-neck cashmere sweater.  Here, wear my leather jacket.  It looks great with the boots.”  Mya says as she takes the jacket off to put next to the rest of the outfit lying on my bed.

“Mya I am not wearing your leather jacket.  I’m a vegetarian.”  I respond indignantly.

“Yes, well, last time I checked, those were not Stella McCartney
fake
leather boots, so wear the jacket.  You will look hot.”  I didn’t feel like arguing with her and as ashamed as I was, the jacket did end up looking really amazing once it was all put together. 

“Okay my darling.  Hair is shiny and fizz free, nails look well rounded and breath is minty fresh.  If I were a man, I’d do you.  You are hot.”  Mya gave me the stamp of approval and I was out the door. 

When I got to the theater, I wasn’t sure if I was going to pay for my own ticket or not and I didn’t see Jake anywhere.  Logically, I would think that he should pay for them since he invited me.  However, he probably spent at least $50 on our drinks alone last night and so I wouldn’t be totally insulted if I had to pay for my own movie.  Luckily though, he did pay.  Jake walked outside to greet me with open arms, two tickets and a nice hug that allowed me to get a whiff of his scrumptious cologne-not too heavy, just right. 

“So, do you want some popcorn or candy?”  Jake asks as we walk toward the concession stand.  Unsure how I should respond as I don’t want to seem like a pig, but I also don’t want him to think I am too nervous to eat, I decide on the Junior Mints; the best of both worlds, chocolate and mint, very important for a first date. 

I have to say, that there is nothing worse than sitting next to a gorgeous male for two and a half hours with nothing but our shoulders touching.  He didn’t try to yawn and stretch.  He didn’t try to touch my hand “accidentally” while sharing the arm rest.  No, he didn’t do anything!  We exchanged looks when something exciting happened or a funny remark was made, but he didn’t try to cop a feel whatsoever!  When the movie ended, Jake walked me back to my car and I had assumed that I would get the “I’ll call you sometime” routine. 

“So, Natalie, what’s this week like for you?”

“Nothing too exciting.  Work will keep me busy probably, but apart from that, no plans yet.”  Dammit, now he’s going to think I’m a boring loser.  I could have lied and said I was having drinks with the girls or a concert to go to or maybe kick boxing class that I faithfully attend twice a week!  Something!  I might as well have told him my weekly line up of television watching since it
was
the new seasons of everything now. 

“I have a client coming in from L.A. this week, but if you have next Wednesday free, I’d like to see you.  Would you want to get dinner?”  His brown eyes glistened and he had a cute smile that was almost cocky yet sincere.  Who was this guy?  I had thought surely he was a player that had obviously figured out I was a spinster, put out to pasture and not worth the time, even with the help of Victoria’s Secret.  Maybe I was wrong. 

“Hmm, I think I am free that night.  Why don’t you give me a call later on this week?”  I reply with my own cocky and sincere smile. 

“Okay then, I will call you with details this week.  Goodnight.”  No kiss.  Another warm, squeezable hug that left me wanting so much more. 

Ian began his Monday morning ready to be refreshed and revitalized.  His morning runs with Jenna usually proved to be a great workout.  Although they rarely made specific time and meeting places, they had an unspoken connection and were able to meet up most mornings to run together.  Ian had learned to read Jenna by her way of running.  This morning was particularly stressful given her endurance and stamina.  After several morning meetings with her, Ian began to feel more comfortable engaging in personal conversation.  This morning, she was finally able to come out and let Ian in on the hypothetical questions and told him the whole story.  As he suspected, the wedding dress was purchased by her and it was obvious that she was already having doubts. 

“It was an impulse buy, Ian.  I don’t know what was wrong with me.  It just felt so right.  Of course, my best friend’s hate me now and I don’t know if I will ever make them feel any different.” 

“I don’t know your friends, but if they really care about you, they will come around.  You may need to be the first one to break the ice though, I’m afraid.  They may love you, but they sound totally pissed off!” 

“Thanks.  You aren’t helping, Ian!  You had better be nice.  If I ever make up with her, I still may try to hook you up with Nat.  She may be a bitch sometimes, but she really is fantastic.”  Jenna replied.  Ian could tell that the thought of losing her best friends was extremely hard for Jenna to fathom.

“As inviting as it sounds, I think you need to worry about your relationship with your friend first, then work on me.”  He was beginning to think meeting this friend of Jenna’s was never going to happen.  To be honest, he wasn’t sure that he was all that interested anymore. 

“Yes, I know.  It’s so hard though Ian.  I can’t talk to Rob about it because he has no idea that I bought the dress.  I can’t take it back to the boutique and to make matters worse, Rob and I haven’t been getting along the last couple of days.  He has been so busy with work that he hasn’t been around all weekend.  I barely get to see him anymore.  He works so hard and then we fight because I miss him.”