‘Go on,’ I said.
‘So . . . at first I just worked as a bodyguard, no weapons, just muscle. I did that for a month or so and it was well paid, but I had no idea who Bentham really was. Then we came back to
London which is where Bentham is based and I started to realise that some of the business things he was doing were probably dodgy, but I thought it was more to do with fraud not violence. Anyway,
it got to February or so and Siobhan had called to say Mum needed money and I’d been sending her cash but I didn’t have enough to cover what she owed and just at that exact moment, Cody
asked if I wanted to earn some extra cash. A
lot
of extra cash. All I had to do . . .’ he lowered his voice, ‘. . . was hide a gun for Bentham. He moves them about because
it’s illegal to own them but he needs them nearby to protect all his money. So . . . so I stashed a revolver for him in my flat.’
‘But that’s . . .’ I covered my mouth with my hand.
‘Illegal . . . stupid . . . dangerous . . .’ Flynn rubbed his forehead, then took a long swig of coffee. ‘I know.’ He set his cup down again. ‘I did it for the
money for Mum. I thought that would be it, but of course Bentham got all heavy and threatened me if I didn’t do it again. Which I did because I was scared.’ Flynn sighed. ‘I
can’t tell you how much I regret having anything to do with Bentham or Cody or any of them.’
I sat back and sipped at the froth on my cappuccino. In a way, my worst suspicions had been fulfilled. Flynn had been breaking the law. Bentham was an out and out gangster, Cody almost as bad.
And yet I believed Flynn when he said he’d never actually used a gun himself.
‘Can I ask
you
something now, River?’ Flynn hesitated.
I nodded, my mind still on everything he’d told me. ‘Go on.’
Flynn leaned forward. ‘Tell me . . . what do I need to . . . how can I make up for everything I’ve done wrong? I hurt you by running away. I was a coward. I never stopped loving you,
but I didn’t . . . couldn’t do the grown-up thing and just talk it through. So now, after all that, what can I do to make things better?’
I gazed into his expressive eyes. All his emotions were there: hurt and anger and love and longing.
‘The more time that passes,’ Flynn went on, ‘the more I realise just how stupid I was to overreact about you kissing James. It was never really about that. I was . . . it was
my whole life, feeling I didn’t know who I was or what I wanted. So . . . so how do I say sorry now?’
I shrugged. ‘I don’t know,’ I said truthfully.
We sat in silence for a bit.
‘I need to be able to trust that you won’t fly off the handle,’ I said at last. ‘That’s one thing.’
Flynn nodded.
‘And you need to be honest with me,’ I went on. ‘You need to tell me how you’re feeling, what you’re going through.’ I paused. ‘Are you really going
back to college?’
‘Yes, I’m going to retake this whole year. Maybe not at Norton, but somewhere nearby, so I can see you every day. It’ll mean we’ll be in the same year, so we can apply to
college together.’
‘Do you still want to do Law at uni?’ I asked.
‘No, History. I’ve decided I don’t want to be a lawyer. But History is interesting and doing a degree will give me a chance to work out what comes next.’
‘Wow.’ I drank some more of my cappuccino. ‘You sound determined.’
Flynn smiled. ‘Once we’re sure Cody has calmed down, then I’ll look for a place to stay and a job.’
‘Where are you living now?’ I asked.
‘In my car,’ Flynn said.
‘
What?
You can’t sleep in your
car.
When did you learn to drive, anyway?’
‘Earlier this year.’ Flynn smiled at the look of horror on my face. ‘I got the car with some of the money I made. I was going to get rid of it, but right now I need it to help
me watch over you. Honestly, Riv, it’s cool. I drive around when I know you’re safe, take thirty-minute breaks, go to where I can get a wash, do my laundry. Once I find a flat
I’ll sell the car for the deposit and look for a proper job.’
‘Sounds like a great plan,’ I said drily. ‘My mum and dad would be impressed.’
‘Don’t,’ Flynn groaned. ‘I know they hate me.’
I made a face. ‘Let’s not talk about them now. We can work out what to say to them another time.’
Flynn finished his coffee. ‘Can I walk with you up the road for a bit? My car’s parked around the corner. And . . . and maybe we could fix our next date?’ He hesitated.
‘I was wondering if it would be okay if I called you as well?’
‘Yes.’ I stood up. A few calls and texts and another date didn’t amount to a proper relationship, just as loving each other wasn’t enough to make that relationship work.
I needed to find out if I could trust Flynn again, and that would only happen over time, after we’d done a whole bunch of small, ordinary things together, away from all the drama of
everything that had happened with Cody. And away from other people’s fixed opinions. Because Flynn was right that Mum and Dad would hate me seeing him, but in the end it was my life, nobody
else’s business.
Flynn and I left the café. It was still raining, and Flynn put his arm across my shoulders as we hurried up the Broadway and into the shelter of a doorway.
‘We should say goodbye here,’ I said. The closer we got to home, the more danger there was of someone I knew seeing us. ‘Thanks for a lovely first date.’
‘Thank you,’ Flynn murmured, then he took my face in his hands and drew me into a long, sweet kiss.
Eventually I pulled away. ‘That wasn’t a very “first date” kiss,’ I said.
Flynn’s eyes twinkled. ‘Let me try ag—’
‘Hey!’ A rough hand grabbed my arm. I gasped.
It was Cody. He stood beside us, his hair damp against his face, one fist thrust into the pocket of his jacket, the other still holding my arm.
‘Get off me!’
‘Let her go!’
Flynn and I spoke at once. Cody ignored us. He fixed his eyes on me.
‘My gun is pointing right at you, River,’ he muttered. ‘If you don’t come with me now, I’ll shoot.’
‘What?’ Panic rose inside me.
‘What the hell are you doing?’ Flynn demanded.
‘Back off.’ Cody swore. ‘It’s River I need to speak to.’
‘Please
,’ I said, my voice a hoarse whisper.
‘Please,
I prom—’
‘Shut up.’ Cody moved closer, prodding me with the gun in his pocket.
He glanced at Flynn. ‘I only want to talk to River for a moment, okay? Walk away.’
With a desperate look at me, Flynn took a couple of steps back. Cody grabbed my arm and dragged me across the pavement. I wanted to shout out, but fear kept my scream in my throat. We reached a
sports car. Cody opened the passenger door and shoved me inside. As he raced around to the driver’s seat, I looked in the wing mirror. Flynn was pelting along the road. I peered more closely,
watching as he stopped running and got into a car himself. I caught a flash of a door slamming, then he was out of sight.
Cody jumped into the car beside me and before I knew what was happening, we had roared away.
The car sped along. Within seconds we were zooming fast, heading across the roundabout and towards the main road. I shrank back, into the corner of the passenger seat.
‘What are you doing?’ I found my voice at last.
Cody glanced across at me. His gun was in his lap. Beads of sweat glistened on his forehead. ‘I just need to talk to you,’ he muttered.
‘
Talk
to me?’ I shook my head. Panic swirled in my guts. ‘We could have
talked
on the pavement. You didn’t have to force me into a car at
gunpoint.’
Cody said nothing.
‘What are you going to do with me?’ My heart was beating so fast I felt sick.
‘I had to get you away from Flynn,’ Cody said. His hands gripped the steering wheel, his eyes darting over the road ahead.
I glanced into the wing mirror again. Was Flynn behind us somewhere? I cursed myself for not having asked him about his car. I’d only seen a flash of the door as it shut. I wasn’t
even sure what colour it was, so, unless it was right behind us, I wouldn’t be able to spot Flynn at all.
‘Come
on.
’ The traffic had slowed up ahead. Cody swore at the stationary cars. He looked seriously unhinged, his eyes wide and staring and his pale brown hair sticking up at
the back.
‘Please, Cody.’ I glanced at my door. We were barely moving right now. Maybe I could try and leap out. I put my hand on the door handle.
‘Stay
still
’ Cody’s voice rose. His hand reached for the gun in his lap. ‘Stay
still
, you bitch. You ratted me out, went to the police. You told them
everything.’
‘I
didn’t
.’ I bit my lip, my whole body trembling. ‘I made one anonymous call.
Please.
’
The traffic ahead moved. Cody pressed on the accelerator and we sped away again. I looked around, but I couldn’t see Flynn in any of the nearby cars. It was too much to hope he’d be
able to follow Cody through all this traffic anyway. I slid my hand inside my jeans pocket. If I could get my phone out without Cody seeing, I could dial 999.
‘No!’
Cody raised his gun again. He glanced angrily across at me. ‘Give me your mobile. And your bag.’
I handed everything over. My bag contained both my purse and Flynn’s wallet. I felt lost without it.
‘Where are we going?’ I asked as we careered, too fast, around a bend in the road. ‘You can’t just—’
‘Shut up,’ Cody snapped. ‘This is all your fault.’
‘What?’
‘You shouldn’t have seen what you saw . . . Bentham giving me that cash, the order to . . . to . . . And you shouldn’t have called the police.’
‘Okay, but . . . but . . .’ I hesitated, the enormity of my situation hitting me. It struck me that if I didn’t go to the police now, I really was turning a blind eye to Cody
and Bentham’s horrific activities. Still, my first priority was to get away from Cody. I could still go to the cops even if I told Cody I wouldn’t. ‘You’re not thinking
straight,’ I insisted. ‘I just made one, anonymous call . . .’ I caught my breath. ‘Cody, I don’t understand. This is all . . . totally outside anything I’ve
ever done or seen or . . . or known.
Please,
I’m
terrified.
’
I turned, my eyes filling with tears, and stared out of the window. We were zooming past rows of terraced houses. They blurred in my vision. How could this be happening? I had never felt so sick
with fear. Another minute passed. From the signs outside I could see we were heading north, towards the M1 motorway. As Cody turned on to another main road, he cleared his throat.
‘You went to the police,’ he said. ‘I have a record already. It didn’t take much to convince them I was guilty, even if they couldn’t prove it. Plus Elmore –
the guy I was supposed to “deal” with – has gone into hiding and Bentham is furious.’
‘Okay, but . . . but that’s over now,’ I said. ‘There’s no point making things worse.’
Cody shook his head, muttering under his breath. We drove on, soon reaching the motorway. As we headed north a heavy rain started to fall from low, grey clouds. It struck me that I was nearly
halfway to the commune. I badly wanted to be there again, among all the comforting and familiar sights and smells, with Dad and Gemma and Lily.
‘How old are you?’ I turned to Cody.
‘Nineteen. Almost twenty,’ he said. ‘Why?’
I took a deep breath. ‘You don’t have to do any of this . . . work for Bentham . . . kidnap me . . . you’ve got
choices
. . .’
There was a long pause.
‘I haven’t kidnapped you,’ Cody said.
‘Okay, then . . . then stop the car and let me out.’
Cody swore but, to my surprise, he slowed the car.
‘Well stop and talk,’ he snapped. That’s all I’m promising.’
‘Okay,’ I said. ‘Thank you.’
A moment later we pulled off the motorway and into a service station car park. It was still raining hard. Cody headed to the back of the car park, away from the other cars. As we drove past, a
man got out of his mini. Pulling his hood up he hurried into the building with the shops and cafés. Apart from the few people who were huddled in the shelter of the entrance, puffing on
cigarettes, there was no one else in sight.
Cody drove past all the parked cars, towards the trees that separated the shops and cafés from the petrol pumps. He pulled up, parking roughly beside a little corrugated iron shelter in a
gap between the trees. As soon as he stopped, I grabbed the handle and pushed open my door.
‘Come back!’ Cody ordered. He lunged for me but I slid under his arm and out of the car. I charged across the tarmac. Cody reached me seconds later. He gripped my shoulder, swinging
me around. The rain drummed down, cold on my shoulders.
‘You stupid bitch,’ he roared, raising his fist.
I flinched. But instead of hitting me, Cody yanked on my arm, pulling me backwards until we were under the corrugated iron shelter. Three large bins overflowed with rubbish. Cody shoved me
against the nearest bin and stood over me, panting heavily. His gun was in his fist, at his side.
I stood facing him, my heart thumping. All I could see was his face and the shelter wall beyond. All I could hear was his ragged breathing and the rain beating loudly on the iron roof. The
stench of rotting meat filled my nostrils. I was totally hidden here from both the shopping area and the petrol pumps beyond. For a terrifying second I felt sure I was going to die, that –
whatever Cody had said about talking – he had brought me here to kill me.
But Cody didn’t move. He just stood over me, his whole body rigid with tension. I turned away, fear racing through my head. I couldn’t think, couldn’t focus. And then it
suddenly struck me that maybe Cody was as terrified as I was, that he didn’t really want to hurt me, that he simply didn’t know whether he could trust me to keep quiet or not.
Which meant that all I needed to do was convince him and he would let me go.
I made myself look at him. ‘Cody?’ I said, keeping my voice as soft and steady as I could.
He glared at me.