CHAPTER SEVEN
Sydney found herself up super-early the next morning.
Maria was still asleep and it was a Sunday, so she went to the only other place that felt like home—the library.
Several hours later, she returned to her dorm room where Maria was up and working on a project: a lamp in the form of a flower.
Sydney stared at Maria’s art supplies scattered around her: the paint, brushes, shading pencils, drawing pad, the random materials related to the flower-lamp project.
“So that art stuff’s pretty easy then?” she asked Maria, as she put down her backpack.
Maria kind of laughed even though the rest of her face didn’t agree.
“What do you mean? You wanna know if I’m just cruising through?” she asked.
“Well yeah—I mean, you’re so talented, it must all come easy to you right?”
Maria laughed again.
“Well thanks. Sometimes, yes, it’s pretty easy. But just like you, who has to actually study sometimes to make sure you get what you need out of the work even though you’re naturally smart, I still have work to do too; I still have to think about things. What works, what doesn’t, how to solve problems when form and function conflict, coming up with new things or how to rework the old...”
She drifted off, gazing into space.
“You know, just the other day, I had a color problem—I still haven’t solved it actually,” she said.
“What do you mean? In your paintings?” Sydney went over to one she had hanging on the wall. “Because it looks like you have no problem with it to me.”
“Usually, no. But this time, I’m trying to find symbols, the right representation of an idea I want to bring to life. Some things are easy, prepackaged; for example, red is passion, green is envy or life or whatever, blue, sadness—stuff like that. But what is the color of forgiveness? The symbol of discovery? The color of change?”
Sydney was quiet for a moment.
“Okay Maria,” she said, switching gears. “I don’t mean to interrupt your project—I just want to know what happened last night.”
“What about it?”
“Well I know we went to a party—I remember up until Nicholas and I kind of fought and then...” She tried to stifle a smile at the memory of her kiss with him. “And then I was talking to this guy named Spike or something. And that’s it. I don’t remember anything after that. And how could that be? I have an exceptional memory!”
“That’s just it—the drug that guy gave you messes with memory. So not only does it make you like, unconscious, but it helps whoever gave it to you get away since you can’t remember anything over that short period of time.” She paused. “So what do you want to do about this? Nicholas beat the shit out of him, and I don’t know if the police were called but when we took you to the doctor we got evidence since the drug was still in your system.”
Sydney looked lost in thought for a moment.
“You think I should bring the law into this,” she said.
“Um, yeah!”
Sydney shook her head.
“I don’t stand a chance...”
“What do you mean? There’s evidence, you have eye witnesses. You just need to file a police report and...”
“And how seriously do you think my case will be taken? Especially with all the actual serious crimes on the waiting list? Murders, women who were actually raped...”
“What are you talking about Sydney? Don’t let him get away!”
“Maria listen: first of all, the rape did not get to happen; the doctors confirmed I was not violated. Second, that guy—he might be well off. You and I both know money talks, and it’s got one heck of a big mouth. And Maria...Maria!” Sydney silenced Maria’s intended protest. “He’s white.”
Maria was breathing hard, an indignant look on her face. She opened her mouth to protest again but this time, she silenced herself, as if finally absorbing the implications of Sydney’s statement.
“M, we both know how things are in the world right now. Who’s going to take this case seriously? I mean I’m not even a lawyer yet and I know I don’t have a chance. If he gets a good lawyer, they can put any number of spins on it.”
“But how...”
“Trust me, good money can buy good lawyers who can make up good stories. Who says it was him who put the drug in my drink for example? Who says he even knew I was under the influence? Suppose he was under the influence of something himself and therefore his judgment was really off? In any case, I don’t have the time or the strength to deal with a battle like this right now; I can’t deal with people prying, trying to ridicule me, belittle me. I thank my lucky stars, God, and my dead relatives looking out for me that it didn’t go all the way, but I am not going to pursue this.”
Maria sat silent, looking distraught.
“But it isn’t fair!” she finally said.
“I know Maria, but I’m pretty happy that Nicholas kicked his...butt.”
She smiled and Maria smiled back.
“Besides, it’s my own fault for going where I don’t belong.”
“Don’t you dare blame yourself Sydney.”
“How can I not? I knew it wasn’t my thing, knew I’d hate it, and all for what? Just to get the attention of some guy? I could have tried in the library...anywhere else but no—I had to come out of my own skin. I’m not going to any of those parties again Maria, and don’t try to make me.”
“Yeah I know Syd, I wouldn’t have tried again—especially after what happened. But besides that, I saw that you really didn’t like it, so I wouldn’t have pushed.”
“Really? Because I think you’re just saying that because I got drugged this time. What if I didn’t?” She stopped herself from saying next what she was thinking, that Maria would have still tried to take her down with her; it was just the nature of people.
“Okay, so I don’t know if I would have. But please don’t blame me either—I had no idea something like that would happen. I just wanted to help you...you know...”
“What, spread my wings? Open my petals to the sun? Get deflowered? Maria...” Sydney took a deep breath. “Look, I’m mad, but not at you. I don’t blame you. Like I said, I’m mad at myself because I knew I shouldn’t have gone. It’s the trouble not being yourself gets you into.”
Maria looked away.
After a few moments, she said:
“Are you gonna tell your parents about it?”
Sydney didn’t answer right away.
“No,” she said finally. “They’ll only insist on me doing something about it.”
“Well...”
“I told you Maria, forget it.
I’m
going to forget it. I’ll just be more careful in the future. I’m done with those parties; haven’t had a good time yet.”
“Yeah right,” Maria said. “You looked like you were enjoying the dancing.”
“I was laughing at myself that’s all.”
“Admit it. You enjoyed it.”
Sydney conceded and gave her a small smile.
“Okay, that one moment in time was fun. That’s it.”
“Do you think you and Nicholas are gonna hook up now?”
“What? No, he doesn’t want us to.”
“Yeah he does, Sydney. He’s just afraid. Syd, Nicholas is the type of guy women flock to. Meaning—yeah I’m gonna be blunt—he’s been around the world if you know what I mean.” She raised her eyebrows twice.
Sydney laughed.
“That’s the blunt version?”
“You know what I mean Sydney. He has access to lots of money as an heir of in influential family, and he’s easy on the eyes. Women are like moths to a flame, and I’m sure he takes advantage of his power. He’s probably used to easy women, gold-digging chicks, and probably used to casting them aside when he’s done with them too. Maybe he’s just not sure he’d get it right with you, and doesn’t want you to be the guinea pig of his first ‘real’ relationship.”
Sydney was impressed with Maria’s estimation.
“Not a bad assessment; quite convincing in fact. It’s just that I get the sense something else is going on with him. I just don’t know what.”
“You plan to find out?”
Maria was grinning at her.
“Maybe.”
Sydney smiled back.
Then their dorm phone rang, making them both jump. The girls looked at each other then at the phone. Sydney put it on speaker on the second ring, then turned to Maria and put a finger to her lips.
“Hi. Sydney?” a male voice inquired.
Sydney picked up the phone.
“How did you get my number?”
“I’m doing well thank you,” Nicholas replied. “We have a student directory remember? And you have a talkative friend,” he added. He had a smile in his voice.
Sydney turned to Maria who shrugged, looking away.
Sydney laughed.
“I’m sorry, I’m a little on edge I guess.”
“I understand.” He was quiet for a few moments. “How are you holding up?”
“I’m fine, really.”
“You’re pressing charges right?”
“No, I won’t.”
There was a moment of silence.
“Can I ask why not?”
“I just...I don’t want to deal with that whole process. I’m just glad things didn’t, you know, get any further.”
“So am I. Or else charges would have been pressed all right. Probably against me though.”
“Um...I appreciate that. Listen, I understand you were the one who found me and...defended my honor. Thank you,” Sydney said.
“No need to thank me. Just knowing I was able to help you out is enough.”
Sydney smiled to herself, forgetting Maria was in the room. Then she remembered and turned to look right into Maria’s grinning face.
“Ask him out!” Maria mouthed.
Sydney fanned away her words.
“Well, I was just calling to, you know, check up on you, make sure you’re okay,” Nicholas said.
“I appreciate that.”
“So, what are your plans for Christmas?”
“Oh, I’m going home. Spend time with my family—my parents, my brother. You know how it is—Christmas is such a family holiday. How about you?”
“Me? Oh, I’m going home too. You know, it’s like you said.”
“That’s nice.”
He cleared his throat.
“Well, enjoy your holidays Sydney. I don’t suppose I’ll be seeing you in the library anymore. I mean...”
Sydney giggled.
“You enjoy your holidays too and I’ll see you in January! In the library of course.”
“Until then. We’ll see what the new year brings.”
Sydney chuckled through their goodbyes and was still smiling to herself when she disconnected the line.
Maria brought her out of her reverie.
“See? Even Nicholas agrees you should press charges. Don’t you want to make sure the creep thinks twice about doing it again?” she asked. “And what about those other girls out there who...”
Sydney sighed.
“Maria, I feel like I’m playing that whack-a-mole game.”
“Okay fine, I get it. Can I ask one more serious question?”
“Shoot.”
“Can I ask what you and Nicholas were doing outside?”
***
A few days later, Sydney came back to their dorm room from the library early once again.
Maria was drawing in her art pad, but when she saw Sydney, she jumped up and told her she had something to show her then dug into her backpack for it. She pulled out a black folder then plucked a photo from it and held it hidden against her chest. She grinned wide before presenting it to Sydney.
“What?” Sydney asked, confused as she stared at the photo of herself.
Maria let out a frustrated sigh.
“Look at your eyes,” she said.
Sydney struggled to see what her friend was talking about. It was just a picture of her as she emerged from the dance floor at her second and last party, but it did seem she was glowing from the experience.
“The light’s pretty bright,” Sydney said.
“Amazing what love can do to bring out that light, huh?” Maria said.
Sydney looked at Maria.
“Have your paints finally gone to your head? What are you talking about?”
“You don’t think you’re in love with him?”
Sydney sighed.
“Maria I’ve had...what, three conversations with him? Been in the same social setting twice?”
“But how long have you known he existed?”
“Maria that’s not fair. The
Dhaltons are like celebrities at home. We’ve known about them for years and years...”
“Yeah but how long has he been making you feel self-conscious?”
“Maria, I would hardly call that love...”
“How long have you been waiting to talk to him? Or for him to talk to you? How long did you wait to kiss him?”
“Maria I still don’t see how...”
“I bet it was something like love at first sight.”
“Right. You can’t really think that exists? Honestly, do you know anyone who that’s happened to?”
Sydney looked at her, defying her to come up with an example but found herself lost in thought, thinking about her parents. They would probably be an example; in fact, it seemed to her they loved each other in a previous life and it had carried over.
“So you don’t think it’s possible? To fall in love with someone quickly?”
“I never said it was impossible in that case—I’m skeptical about that ‘first sight’ business...”
“Forget about ‘first sight’—you admit it’s possible over a short period of time?”
“Well, yeah I guess...”
“Syd, it only takes a spark. Besides, I think ‘at first sight’ could mean more than one thing. Not just literally at first sight. For example, say friends of the opposite sex never saw each other as beyond that...”
“That’s an issue in itself—what friends of the opposite sex never had a thought about being more than friends? Ever?”
“Stay focused Syd. Now say these friends for whatever reason—tragedy, a huge act of unselfishness, whatever—something forces them to see each other in a different light. That’s a form of first sight—they’re seeing each other for the first time in a completely different way. Besides, falling in love is not the same thing as loving someone fiercely—the kind you grow into. Infatuations count. Are you telling me you’ve never had an instantaneous crush on someone?”
Sydney looked at the wall.
“People grossly underestimate love Sydney. It can happen at first sight, at first word, at first kiss. It’s a sneaky little thing. No one can predict it or stop it once that arrow’s shot.”
Sydney gave her a look.